Groin Attack / Web Videos

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Groin Attacks in Web Videos.

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Played for Comedy:

• Analyst Bronies React: Midnight Sonata drops a stack of binders on Thespio's lap. He shouts "OH, MY HORSE APPLES!"
• The Angry Joe Show: At the end of his review of the Deadpool game, Joe is confronted by Deadpool, angry at dissing his game. Joe manages to convince him the game was lacking... in kicking guys in the balls. Deadpool agrees, and thanks Joe... with a punch to the nuts. After that, Joe swears to not review any Deadpool game again.
• After viewing Zardoz, Oancitizen takes the "Gun is Good, Penis is Evil" message too literally and goes to the bathroom to shoot off his groin. He somehow misses.
• When Cinematic Excrement was reviewing The Host (2013), his "Soul" makes him punch himself in the groin after he tried to stop her.
• Bart Baker: This happens a lot in Bart's parodies.
  • The parody of Eminem's Love The Way You Lie ft. Rihanna, titled Used To Be a Guy has Eminem's grandfather cut his own penis out with a pair of scissors to become his grandmother.
  Eminem: He took scissors and cut off his man pipe.
  • Robin Thicke's parody of Blurred lines has this happen to Robin twice, one at the start of the video and one by the girl he knocked up.
• Channel Awesome:
  • During the First Year Anniversary Team Brawl, The Angry Video Game Nerd hammers The Nostalgia Critic in the groin with a rapid-fire series of punches (essentially working his nuts like a speedbag), causing him to reel backward and squeal out "I'm in pain!" in a high-pitched voice.
  • In a Nostalgia Critic Halloween episode, when the evil Teddy Ruxpin doll bites the Critic in the crotch because of his "mean" review on Teddy Ruxpin dolls.
    • Aaaand...there was the first Nerd vs Critic battle, when they fought with light sabers, but the Critic accidentally had his upside-down...
    • And during his series, video game confessions, where he's a bartender at a restaurant that sees many video game characters, Samus is apparently the giver of 2 crotch shots, and I mean "with the lazer gun" shot, to both Justin Bailey, and Leisure Suit Larry, because she hates it when people ogle her.
  • Bennett the Sage claws That Guy's nuts when That Guy tries to shoot Bennett for being such a sick bastard.
  • In Kickassia, the Critic finally got to do this to someone else, showing Lee one of the few downsides of being three-dimensional.
  • In Nostalgia Critic's review of Casper, an animated Casper infuriated by the Critic's panning of his film states that if he can't have a lasting impact on popular culture, he can still have one on his balls. Cue Groin Attack.
  • In the "You're A Dirty Rotten Bastard" Christmas Special, before meeting his guardian angel, the Critic clamps the poor guy's balls.
  • Happened a few times in Suburban Knights, especially with Malachite using magic to force Nostalgia Critic to hit himself in the balls, 15 times.
  • At the end of the Nostalgia Critic's review of Man of Steel, Superman opts to defeat Zod by Heat Vision castration instead of killing him.
  • In the NC's review of Nicolas Cage's The Wicker Man (2006), in order to get Critic to reference the infamous NOT THE BEES scene, Tamara holds onto him while Malcolm hits his groin with a baseball bat. Every time the Critic is hit, his voice gets higher.
• Happens every so often on Critical Role, including one memorable scene in which Vax trades Grog a free hit at his own balls for a spare healing potion. The sheer glee as Grog slowly lines up his shot is really something to see.
• "Deadpool: The Musical":
  • In the first video's song parody of "Gaston," Deadpool drops to his knees and sings as he acts out the lyrics, "No one punches you right in the dick like Deadpool!" He leaves his victim clutching his groin in pain.
  • In "Deadpool: The Musical 2" during the Moana parody, Deadpool uses a slingshot that strikes with a carnival game bell sound as he sings, "I hit this guy, right in the nuts, why do the fans seem to like that so much?"
  • In the Mulan parody of "Deadpool: The Musical 2", Black Widow sings "don't know if we're friends or if I'm a fool", with Deadpool immediately quipping "with benefits?!" She responds by using her baton to electrocute him from his crotch.
• Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog: As part of a montage of Captain Hammer's jerkass humiliations against a helpless Dr. Horrible, he gives the doctor both a knee to the groin and an extremely painful-looking wedgie.
• Dragon Ball Z Abridged
  • Cooler Returns has Meta-Cooler kick Vegeta in the groin. Multiple times during the fight with him, but that first one...ouch.
    Vegeta: He keeps kicking me in the dick! Why?! Why does he keep kicking me in the dick?!!
  • When Goku and Vegeta take on a whole multitude of Meta-Cooler clones, they are both captured.
    Goku: Wow. I can't believe every single one of them kicked you in the dick!
    Vegeta: [whimpers in high-pitched pain]
  • In Super Android 13, Goku gets hit with this when the titular villain punches him in the groin hard enough to knock him right out of Super Saiyan mode. So hard, in fact, there is a Flash Forward scene with his future son, Goten, fading out of existence, making the implications very clear. Naturally, Vegeta doesn't hesitate to respond to the irony.
    Goku [with really squeaky voice] He punched me in the dick! Why?! Why did he punch me in the dick?!
    Vegeta: Not so funny now, huh Kakarot?
    • Thanks to the Senzu Beans, he got better.
  • In Cell Vs. Bobby Hill, Cell lets Bobby to take the first shot. Needless to say, Bobby makes that first shot count.
    'Cell: C'mon, Bobby-boy! Let's rumble-
    Bobby Hill: THAT'S MAH PURSE! I DON'T KNOW YOU! (punts Cell in the groin)
    Cell: (bloodcurdling scream)
• Enter the Dojo: A staple of the slapstick humor on the show:
  • The prime MO of Ameri-Do-Te and Rachel's specialty, as demonstrated in "Destroy the Groin".
  • A sparring match between Billy and a student from a rival dojo consists entirely of groin grabs in "Kung Foolishness".
  • "100 Ways to Attack the Groin" is by far the most watched video Enter the Dojo has yet produced.
• Final Fantasy VII: Machinabridged has Tifa inflict this on Reno, complete with X-ray showing his crushed pelvis. A few episodes later, Reno visits the doctor who explains just how destroyed his dick was after that encounter.
• Game Grumps: While the action itself wasn't shown on camera, Danny recounted one time where he met Matt Thompson (One of the executive producers for Archer) at a convention, where Matt was so drunk he punched Danny right in the dick. Though he later sent him an apology e-mail after he sobered up, and they met in much better circumstances a few times after that.
• In The Gamers, when the party needs to buy time for the Wizard to cast Polymorph on The Shadow, one of the other party members decides to try a "Called Shot to the Nuts", arguing that the groin is a weak spot, and any attack hitting an enemy's weak spot will stun them for one turn. It somehow works.
• The Horribly Slow Murderer with the Extremely Inefficient Weapon:
  • When Jack tries to go after the Ginosaji with a buzzsaw, the Ginosaji makes him saw his own crotch instead. Even the Ginosaji cringes.
  • In "Save Jack", one of the options you can pick is Jack kicking the Ginosaji in the crotch. Like every other attempt to stop the unstoppable Ginosaji it doesn't end well.
• The Comedy Central/Atom.com online series Hot Sluts also plays this trope as well, with the girls of the nightclub (most notably Irena) kicking or kneeing perverted men from within sight.
• During InTheLittleWood and Strippin's golf challenge, the latter hits the former in the balls with a club, causing him to wince in somewhat comedic pain.
• A series of videos on YouTube entitled "Kicked in the Nuts" involves a man in an orange afro wig kicking (supposedly) unsuspecting people in the nuts. They invariably react at first with pain and/or anger, until he points at the camera and informs them that "You've been kicked in the nuts!", at which point they're just happy to be on camera.
• In a (mercifully non-canon) comedic scene at the beginning of insideLG15's "An LG15 Wedding", lonelygirl15's Danielbeast is shot in the crotch by Lucy.
• Inverted in One Punch Stan, in which Sonic attacks Stan's fist with his own groin. Twice.
• Ozzy Man Reviews: "Cricket Nut Shots" and "Nutcracker Compilation" are videos with guys getting hit in the balls or being injured in that very sensitive area with comedic commentary. It looks extremely painful, but it's also absolutely hilarious. Sometimes it's accidental, but at times the guys brought it on themselves.
• Taken to the extreme and done wonderfully over-dramatic by Rocket Jump in their Balls of Steel - The Ultimate Nutshot video, where it's delivered by Superman to a serial killer.
• The Spoony Experiment: Done to a headless (played by Miles) at the end of Spoony's Ultima Underworld 2 review.
• In one of Thomas Sanders' Vines, he gets the "Left foot, red!" cue in Twister and applies that foot to a guy wearing red shorts.
• Todd in the Shadows made a Top Ten List of movie groin shots. (In the spirit of Hypocritical Humor, he included Ow, My Balls! from Idiocracy, noting that it would have to be a hideously stupid world where audiences liked a show that was just a series of people being hit in the groin.) Also, he still missed one.
• Nash is bitten in the groin by Domo-kun in the episode of What the Fuck Is Wrong with You? featuring JesuOtaku. (Groin attacks are a semi-regular appearance on the stories featured on WTFIWWY.)
• The Yogscast song "Carrot for a Cock" shows that the snowman with the titular vegetable appendage is apparently "terrified of rabbits". Can't imagine why.
• Pretty much any boyfriend/girlfriend or brother/sister "prank war" on YouTube will feature the guy getting whacked in the nuts at some point.

Played for Drama:

• The second installation of The Awkward Compilation contains two in quick succession. First Alex against Lester in a staged fight to make Kevin look like a hero (which later leads to some unforgettable mental imagery when Lester remarks, "It's like a cat tried to suck my dick."), then Henry against Kevin. He takes a run at it.
• In the ridiculously So Bad, It's Good video, The Death Of Batman, the Caped Crusader is stabbed in the crotch with a taser and electrocuted before being dropped to the ground with a kick to the groin. It's meant to be dramatic, but it comes off as ridiculous.
• In the KateModern episode "Back on Brick Lane", Gavin, who is having a mental breakdown, chases after and pounces on Jennifer — a complete stranger — mistaking her for Kate. Jennifer knees him in the groin and runs off, yelling hysterically. Gavin lies on the ground, coughing and sobbing.
• Happens three times in Slug Street Scrappers:
  • Bruiser defeats Peaches in the first video by kicking her square between the legs.
  • Peaches suffers it again in the second video, this time from Shizuka except the second time, she's faking the pain — she learned from the first encounter and trained specifically to counter that particular tactic.
  • In the third video, one of the Slugger Squad members gets in a cheap shot on Knuckles by kicking her in the crotch, from behind, defeating her in the process.
• TierZoo:
  • While the narrator talks about the hyena's powerful bite force in "Top 3 Underrated Animals," we're treated to a shot of a hyena biting at a water buffalo's testicles. Ouch.
  • In "Are Rhinos OP?", it's repeatedly pointed out that the rhino's perineum (the area between the anus and genitals) is its weak spot, and several video clips show it being attacked right there.

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