Funny / The Prophecy II

• Gabriel's first lines when he finds Thomas, now a monk, praying in a monastery:
  Gabriel: The monkeys never did get that one right. It's not "willing servants of Heaven"; it's "winged."
  • Gabriel's assessment of Thomas's quarters:
    Gabriel: This place looks lived in.
  • Followed by him trying to get information from his old foe:
    Gabriel: What about these visions, Thomas? What do you do? You write 'em on a scroll, a stone tablet—I know how much you prophets enjoy doing that. Or...maybe a picture?
• Gabriel taunting Danyael (who's recently had sex with Valerie in order to conceive The Chosen One) after he attacks Raphael.
  Gabriel: Take a deep breath, Danyael. It's not too late to fix this. Come back...now. As far as I'm concerned, nothing happened. She was a momentary lapse in self-control, Danyael, but I'll find her.
  [Danyael runs away]
  Gabriel: DON'T WALK AWAY! [throws arms up in exasperation] Kids! They don't listen these days.
• Gabriel visiting the dry cleaners and trying to get the clerk to look up info on Valerie, only to blow it by calling the clerk by his name, at which point he says "Don't ask me how I know" and executing his instant death touch.
  • Gabriel then tries to use the store's computer, only to end up grabbing it and chucking it across the room in a fit of frustration before stalking away.
• Gabriel greeting Izzy after bringing her back to life following her suicide attempt in what could be seen as a Call-Back to the first film:
  Gabriel: Hi! Nice hair.
  • When Izzy tries to wake up Julian, Gabriel offhandedly informs her that her boyfriend is dead, THEN tries to enlist her assistance. His light and conversational tone is what makes it hysterical.
    Izzy: Julian?
    Gabriel: He's gone. He's dead. He's taking a dirt nap. Listen, I'm a little short-staffed at the moment.
  • When Izzy starts to cry:
    Gabriel: Don't start. Don't start, please. He's the cold eye. He's spilled milk.
    Izzy: Julian!
    Gabriel: C'mon, c'mon, kiddo! We got to work to do.
  • As the two head off:
    Izzy: Didn't I just kill myself?
    Gabriel: Yes and no. The answer to that is up to me.
• At the dry cleaners as Izzy works the computer:
  Izzy: You brought me back to life because you don't know DOS?
• "Monkey wannabe. Wanna dance?"
• As Gabriel and Izzy pursue Valerie in a car, Izzy ends up crashing through a fence and into a yard where a dog starts barking. Gabriel orders Izzy to "Back it up!", then tells her:
  Gabriel: Try not to hit the dog.
• After Gabriel is knocked unconscious:
  Izzy: [to Valerie] I'd get the fuck out of here if I were you.
• Gabriel being questioned by a cop before taking notice of the cop's police scanner, calling it a "miracle," and executing his death touch to get his hands on it and the officer's gun.
• The look on Gabriel's face as he glances from Izzy to a shopkeeper after Izzy attempts to shoot herself, followed by:
  Gabriel: Are we having a communication problem? What? [points at the shopkeeper who's dialing 911] Take it easy.
• For some nice Black Comedy, when the police arrive at the church where Gabriel is dragging Valerie out of the building, Izzy comes up and hands him the stolen handgun. Gabriel then looks at the police officers, holds up his hands, and tells them "No, wait!" in an utterly confused tone of voice right before the cops gun him down.
• Gabriel casually strolling into the interrogation room, putting on his Badass Longcoat after recovering from being shot multiple times, and killing the cop questioning Izzy.
• After Gabriel announces they're going to Eden:
  Izzy: I'll find another car.
• Gabriel's remark upon arriving at Eden:
  Gabriel: What a dump.
  • When Izzy reaches for a fruit hanging off a tree:
    Gabriel: Don't eat that! Trust me.
• Gabriel's greeting to Danyael right before their final battle:
  Gabriel: Well, if it isn't the honeymooner.
  • In the middle of their fight, Gabriel asks Danyael "What are you, in love?!"

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