Funny / The PreDespair Kids

The Predespair Kids takes the quirky weirdness of its source material up to eleven. Even at its darkest, there's still some things to laugh about.

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The Predespair Kids

• All the antics Leon often finds himself in. There's a reason the blog is also called "The Leon Kuwata Abuse Diaries."
  • Special mention goes to the gnome incident.
• The characters' typical reactions to pickup lines.
• When Maverick attempts to Blackmail Kyoji with fake pictures of him and Mikan doing "less than decent things", Kyoji's (presumably deadpan) response is
  Kyoji: I gotta say your editing skills leave a lot to be desired. You made my arms too long in the first one, Mikan’s eyes are off center in the fourth, and come on, her breasts are not that big.
• When an anon asked Junpei if he would rather date Karma or Naomi, he responded with "Can I choose to shoot myself?"
• The Cookie Jar Exchange
• This little exchange when Hajime and Chiaki try playing Mario bros together.
  Chiaki: Wow, you really are bad at video games.
  Hajime: You don’t have to be so blunt about it...I warned you, after all.
  Chiaki: You got killed by the first Goomba in the stage, Hajime. That’s inexcusable.
• Class 77 and 78's return from their vacations is accompanied by a cavalcade of chaos and confusion. Kyoko and Sakura, meanwhile, are busy playing chess.
  Anon: Hope all the noise outside didn't interrupt the chess match... how goes it, Kiri and Ogami?
  Kyoko: Hmm…? *looks outside* Oh. Mondo’s on the flagpole.
  Sakura: ...
  Kyoko: ...
  Sakura: It's your move, I believe.
• After Peko agrees to teach Rina how to use a sword, Rina gets so excited that she accidentally sends Peko's sword crashing out a window.
  Peko: Well...I’ll have to explain that to Taka and Mahiru at the next Disciplinary Committee meeting...
• Rina, suffering from stage fright before the practical exams, hides in a storage closet in an attempt to calm herself down. And Akane hears her as she walks by.
  Rina: Okay... okay, calm down Rina... You're gonna be okay... You're gonna... be... oh...
  Akane: Huh? *Knocks on the door* Someone in there?
  Rina: Eek! *she grabs bunches of her hair and pulls it over her face, trying to hide behind it* N-No, nobody's here! Just an empty closet!
  Akane: Oh. Alright….*About to walk away but stops*…….wait a second…..empty closets don’t talk! Unless someone’s in them!
  Rina: AH! *she jumps and crashes into multiple cleaning supplies* NO! I'M JUST A CLOSET! AN EMPTY, EMPTY CLOSET! *she tries to bury herself in empty garbage bags*
  Akane: Rina, come out of the closet.
  Rina: NO! I'M NEVER COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET! NEVER, NOT EVER!!! *in her struggle to hide, she loses her headband*
  Akane: You sound like my brother. *Kicks the door open* Rise and shine!
• Whenever Mod J starts shitposting.
  • Many of Mod J's comments on certain asks, which range from casual commentary to utter bafflement.
  • And Mod J's yandere tendencies whenever someone tries to hit on Leon.
• Several asks trying to get Komaeda to run, all of which end up being interrupted somehow.
• This random picture done by Therealantisepticeye, Rogue's creator.
• The responses to Mod J's list of crack pairings
  • Fight me!
  • #LetJunpeiFindLove
• The kinks!
  • Canon Characters:
    • Kyoko's into bondage.
    • "Intimate stuff" for Fuyuhiko.
    • Hiro likes red underwear
    • Kazuichi likes it when girls make innuendos without realising it
    • Mukuro's got a biting fetish.
    • Taka's into S&M
    • Mondo's got an embarrassment thing
    • And, of course, Junko's got her despair fetish.
  • Named Anons:
    • Maverick's a sadist.
    • Naomi may or may not have a slavery fetish.
    • Kyoji may or may not be into food play, and likes the idea of multiple partners. But no more than 2, he's bad at multitasking.
    • Mage is into S&M, Bondage, she's submissive, biting, uniforms and having more than one partner.
    • Karma likes tentacles, physical pain, handcuffs, blindfolds and Vore. She's more dominant than submissive, but does enjoy the occasional submissiveness (especially if she's being treated like a dog)
    • Junpei's a submissive masochist.
    • Suzumu's a masochist, and one of her turn ons is men in suits.
    • Daisuke's into BDSM and enjoys playing the submissive role.The creator later revealed that Daisuke has no Kinks.
    • Unfortunately, Rock and Rina are asexual, and have no kinks to be discussed.
    • Similarlrly, Dragonus and Kiyo are too innocent for kinks, and blush furiously at the mention of them. Aren't these 4 precious?
    • Oceanis likes to, ahem, "eat", is super-submissive, and doesn't mind doing "Frisky stuff" if it's someone close to her.
    • Rogue is into neck biting.
    • Kumi is a switch (both submissive and dominant) and a masochistic "ropebunny"
  • And then there's Mod J, saying how much he don't want to hear about this.
• The Truth or Dare arc of the hope games started off really, really funny...but then this happened.
• The many circumstances that prevent Michael from finding Mukuro, which just continue piling up.
• An anon asked the named anons who they would sacrifice themselves for. Most of them gave fairly heroic answers, but Maverick got around to answering... well, see for yourself
• Schadenfreude. Class 75 edition.
• Crossing with Heartwarming, Junpei admits he cares what would happen to Karma. And then He realises what he saidand runs away
• When Kyoji gives Karma a concoction designed to give her a Perception Filter ability, her first ideas on how to use it are... to sneak into the men's locker room and spy on Junpei.
• The named anons were asked what would their ideal relationship with the students of classes 78 and 77-b would be:
  Maverick's creator: Maverick would want everyone in the classes to be his slaves. Or dead, dead works too.
• During the invasion of Hope's Peak, Richard and Oceanis have this exchange:
  Richard: Dear oh dear….this conflict simply won’t do…why the person that’s responsible for must be one hell of a sadist-
  Oceanis: Usually I love hearing your kink diagnostics, but now really isn’t the time!
• While the event itself is horrifying, checking out the replies on the posts documenting The fall of Hope's Peak. View some of the highlights here, seperated by post:
  • "Tick":
  Commander Bubbles: OH FUCK, IT’S BEGUN
  • "Tock":
  foolbio: This is going to be… A blast… I’m sorry
  anya554: Well FUCK. But, not gonna lie, I laughed along with the demon bear.
  • "An Outside View":
  Vesper Lord: Please, let none of these precious characters die… I say in vain.
  • "Trio Up":
  The Real Anti Septic Eye: IF NAGITO GETS HURT I SWEAR ON MY LIFE I WONT TOUCH THIS BLO G OM F…..ITS ALSO MAKING ME MAD THAT MAHIRU ALMOST D I E D YA MEME
  • "Despair Arrival":
  Vesper Lord: The bitch came back the very next day/Oh, the bitch came back, I thought she was a goner/But, the bitch came back, she won’t stay the fuck away
  • The Truth Of A Girl
  Vesper Lord (Part 1): I need to go pick up my jaw now...
  Vesper Lord (Part 2): Junko you %#^Y&U*I*$%^&*#$*&%^#&$@*@$&%#^$&%#%^#%&^*3%&^&$*@%#&^&&&^#&%*&^#
  • Reminiscing:
  Vesper Lord: So essentially, Miaya and Kyoji are Ryoko’s parents? Biotherapy FTW!
  Anya554: S-so… U-uh… T-that. Well, let’s try for the bright side… We got to hear Munakata and Juzo, and Ruruka, Seiko, Chisa, and kinda-sorta Miaya. So…that’s cool?(blatantly trying to avoid depression) Also, I wonder how the parents are going to react…(Bio Therapy FOREVER!!)
  • The Online Goal:
  Vesper Lord (In 3 separated comments) :What. WHAT. WHAT?!
  Anya554: I'm so FUCKING CONFUSED. JUNPEI'S A GOOD GUY?! THIS IS THE BIGGEST PLOT TWIST YET. WHY AM I TYPING IN ALL CAPS?!!
  • The Detective, The Swordswoman, and The Affluent Progeny:
  Vesper Lord: Chisa’s sending them to the roof? Where Monaca is? WHERE JUNKO IS? I am very, very suspicious of her now…
  Commander Bubbles: Y'all think you know what’s gonna happen….but I know the truth ^^
  • "The Soldier":
  Vesper Lord: KICK SOME ASS MUKURO!
  Commander Bubbles: Mukuro is the hero we deserve!
  • Rooftop Rescue:
  bubhh: Did you just….? *Slow clapping* Congratulations, Mod J. You went above any expectations I had.
  sdhl-artist: Oh dear god its coming soon what no one wants
  baka2niissan (In 3 seperated comments): Oh fuck. oh fuck. SHITE
  therealantisepticeye: NONONONONONONOOMOMOMHKINONGMJNNONINOMNONONONOMONKNONO
  • The Nurse:
  Anya554: YES. THIS SHIP MUST SAIL. I DON’T GIVE A CRAP ABOUT THE WORLD RIGHT NOW AS LONG AS THESE TWO MAKE IT OUT OF THIS!
  bluehairedlance: SHIP IT LIKE FEDEX. SHIP IIIIIIT!
  • The 77th Lucky Student and The Musician:
  baka2niissan: OH MY GOD. HOLLY SHIT. MIKE IS PROUD! SUCH PRECISION
  therealantisepticeye: OMG MIKE IS PROUD?!! nOOOOOOOO THIS IS UPSETTING MAN
  Anya554: My mind cannot comprehend. But, in all truth–yes I can comprehend. I can’t believe it. Nagito’s dead. Ibuki’s evil. It’s amazing. I always wanted to see an evil Ibuki… Now, if you’ll excuse me…(stalks off to strangle Ibuki)
  foolbio: Oh no… Ibuki’s a despair… I shall remember you as our gnome friend and cookie boobies chick.
  therealantisepticeye: I juST *pencil dives out the window*
  Commander Bubbles: I…I did not see that coming. At all. Goddamn. And there are still FOUR casualties left to come. And TWO despairs in the group.
  swirly592: FUCK NAGITO. INSANE HUSBAND NO! AND WHY MUST IBUKI BE EVIL?! MUSICAL WIFE NO!
  therealantisepticeye (Over 2 seperate comments): EVEN IF SHE STABBED HIM IN THE HEART BETWEEN THE RIBS HE DONE DEAD AND I FUCKIGHN- I WILL FIGHT MIKE MYSELF!!! IDC IF HE’S PROUD OR NOT!
  thebluehairedlance: NOOOOO! Ibuki..Ibuki was despair and I failed her! I thought she’d stay hopeful….I wish I’d seen this sooner. What were the signs? When did she change and how?
  bubbh:''' Ibuki is what now? You better have a REALLY good reasoning for this, Mod J. (Oh, and Nagito is dead. But that’s not the important thing here.)
  Vesper Lord:''' One of my favorite characters… just killed another one of my favorite characters… I… I… Oh my god…
  baka2niissan: Oooh vesperlord is feeling the despair xD
  therealantisepticeye: Vesperlord is feelin’ it now Mr. Krabs xD
  • The Gymnast, The Gangster, and The Photographer:
  Anya554: Oh thaNK GOODNESS YOU 3 ARE STILL ALRIGHT NOW JUST FOCUS ON GETTING THE FUCK AWAY FROM HOPE’S PEAK. Oh, and don’t dare look back.
  Swirly 592: … Why do none of you have a bad feeling about this?
  therealantisepticeye: I'mnotready
  foolbio: Nooneisready
  • The Princess and The Mechanic:
  Vesper Lord (Over 3 comments): WHAT THE FUCK. I DID NOT. WHOA.
  baka2niissan: WHAT THE HOLLY SHIT
  youngsly3: NOOOOOOOOO
  bluehairedlance: MECHANIC BRO NOOOOOO!
  bubbh: I’m not even going to start with everything wrong is this one.
  Anya554: *can’t even post, too busy sobbing* Oh, wait…I just posted, didn’t I?
  • Writing A Lament:
  foolbio: Everytime I see the notification of the blog I feel bad and sweaty, is it normal?
  • The Murderous Fiend and The Writer:
  Commander Bubbles (Over 2 comments): Toko plz. There’ll be plenty of time to do that when Monokumas aren’t trying to kill everyone
  • Hunting In Destruction:
  Commander Bubbles: On one hand, it’s sad seeing your best friend turn out to be a despair the whole time. On the other hand, SEIKO TO THE RESCUE, BITCHES!
  • The Chef and The Fortune Teller:
  Anya554: Oh, YEAH! We all kinda forgot Teruteru exists…
  • The Fighter, The Reserve Course Student, and The Programmer:
  Commander Bubbles: I was not ready for today.
  theantisepticeye: What the fUCk
  baka2niissan: I… i can’t breath… I… omg
  sdhlartist: Fuck Mod you have destroyed me forever
  ladymage: K WHAT THE FUCK!!!! NO YOU DO NOT KILL SAKURA THE AWESOME! YOU DO NOT KILL SAKURA THE AWESOME! ALSO CHI?! A DESPAIR?! WE WANTED TO PROTECT YOU WHY!? WHY!? WE SHOULD HAVE SAVED SAKURA
  Vesper Lord: Ha… ha… ha…. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH I’M NOT EVEN ALL THAT SURPRISED HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
  • This Interlude Post:
  Commander Bubbles: You’re a bastard. I love you, but you’re a grade A bastard.
  ladymage: we aren’t booing, we are sobbing and going boo-hoo: also did you get a skull goblet from Kotaka or something? Cause seriously you are becoming him, becoming the man that really killed leon…
  cuteshirokuma: You’re death to me
  foolbio: I’m not crying, cause there are no more tears in my eyes.
  Commander Bubbles: Man, remember when this blog was about shipping, bad pick-up lines, and pranks? Those were good times.
  Vesper Lord: I’m literally laughing my head off right now. In a really, really uncertain way. I’m glad today’s a late start at school and nobody’s around, else I’d have to explain to everyone why I sound like a crazy person.
  Commander Bubbles: : EIGHT PEOPLE ARE DEAD. AND SO AM I
• "The Nurse," a Lighter and Softer section of the Fall of Hope's Peak, has quite a few Awesome and Heartwarming Moments between Mikan and Kyoji. And right after he says that he needs her...
  Mikan: ……………I-
  Chisa: *appears at the door* Tsumiki! Nakamura!
  Mikan: Y-Yukizome-sensei!
  Kyoji: (GODDAMMIT CHISA!) Chisa! Has the cavalry arrived?
• "The Murderous Fiend And The Writer" finally brings Toko's fantasies to the blog... sort of. She's worried about Byakuya being tortured... well... no... not worried, exactly...
  Narration: -18+ TOKO FUKAWA FANTASY HERE-
• From "The Chef and The Fortune Teller"
  Teruteru: W-we made it out of there! Thank goodness!
  Hiro: I dunno what you mean! We were fine the whole way through!
  Teruteru: We were attacked 7 times, Hiro!
  Hiro: True….but we survived right? That’s the important part!
  Leon: How the hell did you mange to survive again…?
  Hiro: Been dodging bullets all my life! This is nothing!
• After "The Team Manager and The Breeder" was uploaded, many of the blog's followers began to panic since Ethos was seen in the update but Mukuro (who was with him, last we knew) was not. Mod J quickly replied, saying
  Mod J: WHY DID EVERYONE SIMULTANEOUSLY MESSAGE ME ABOUT MUKURO? PEOPLE SHE’S FINE. GOOD LORD
• When Kyoji finally reveals his true appearance to the group.
  Kyoji: *takes out a small syringe and pricks himself in the neck. His hair and eyes shift from brown to dark teal* Agh, that always feels weird. Kyoji Nakamura, former Ultimate Geneticist and current doctor in training.
  Toko: Wh-wh-wh-what the hell was that?!
  Aoi: What kind of injection was that?!
  Kyoji: Phenotype alterator. With this, I change my whole appearance down to the genetic level. Makes me untraceable. For the most part.
  Gundham: I see….as if you have made artificial magic!
  Toko: Does everything have to supernatural with you?!
• "City Travelers" shows Class 79 has not only found supplies and shelter, but also manages to find some levity in their situation.
• This little exchange from "The FF Survivors"
  Izayoi: *Messing around with some metal parts in the corner*
  Chisa: Izayoi? What are you doing…?
  Izayoi: I figured that Oroya is probably going to need a prosthetic. I’m looking at what would be suitable metals.
  Chisa: ….wait…we’re in the middle of the air, and you didn’t have those when we got here. Plus all you have is weapons in that jacket….Izayoi, where did you get that metal…?
  Izayoi: ………………..
  Chisa: Izayoi. If I get this helicopter inspected, and there are pieces missing-
  Izayoi: Well, if it helps, none are necessary pieces for it to work.
  Chisa: Izayoi!
  Toko: Geez, would you two shut up?!

The Despair Kids

• Even during the Tragedy, some people can't resist.
• Ethos dons a godzilla onesie. Enough said.
• MEANWHILE
• Orichi proves himself to be the master of defusing tension. While Junpei and Kyoji are having a serious discussion concerning the state of the world, he suddenly shows up dressed in a maid outfit.
• Rogue seems to have made it her mission to mess with Toko as often as possible.
  Byakuya: It’s like being stuck in a room with bickering children.
• Is Junpei YokozawaGay or European?
• After a long-term communications blackout with the team in Towa City is finally broken, Ethos suggests they take a car to try and meet up with them, though he notes that he couldn't make it in time, especially not with the surveillance around the city. Chiaki's response is priceless.
  Chiaki: Ethos….we’re on an island. We couldn’t go by car anyway.
• During the Battle Of Future Foundation Arc, the competitors are forced into various little challenges. Kin and Teruteru have one called "Word Poison", all about word association. Kin wins, with this exchange causing Teruteru to stutter and lose.
  Teruteru: Meat
  Kin: Dick.
• The Despair Kids: The Musical is a tag collecting the various song parodies that have been made, including:
  • The Mob Song-DK Edition
  • It's Our School Now
  • Sincerely Me- DK Edition
  • I'm Number One (Maverick and Junko Edition) and The Interrogation Song-DK Edition
• Strip Poker: Mage is invited by her boyfriend Toson to play with him, Yuuki, Kobo and Orochi. She ends up winning via royal flush, causing Orochi to have to strip, while the other three boys watch in their underwear cheering her on