Funny / Sheldon

Have a seat, you're going to be here a while...

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• Sheldon MELTING due to playing a video game for too long.
• Sheldon is seeing problems with Dante's Halloween costume.
• Arthur really wants Sheldon to make him a pancake.
• This glorious Lampshade Hanging of Carnivore Confusion as Arthur eats a Thanksgiving turkey.
• "You're a duck wearing little pants."
• When a girl that Sheldon likes is in love with Dante, Dante has a fool-proof plan to fix the situation...
  • From the same storyline...
  Sheldon: OH HE'S JUST GOT SCHEMES WITHIN SCHEMES, DOESN'T HE?!!
  • And...
  Dante: Ask her if she's ready to have little mannequins with you.
  Sheldon: JUST LEMME PRACTICE!
  • Eventually Sheldon manages to get a date with the girl, and he overdresses a bit.
  Sheldon: Girls like it when you dress up. I distinctly remember that from those ZZ Top lyrics... "Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp-dressed man."
  (Beat)
  Sheldon: Should I be worried that I'm taking fashion advice from guys with three-foot long beards?
  Arthur: YES.
• "Fo' shizzle on the plastizzle bizzle."
• Sheldon just wants to have applesauce for dinner.
• "BUT WHAT'S THIS?? A giant T-Rex is attacking Microsoft."
• Sheldon and Dante agree to never take Arthur fishing with them again.
• Sheldon's surfing.
• "Must... not... throttle... duck..."
• The perfect little village sleeps peacefully. Imagine their surprise when...
  Arthur: Godzilla ATTACKS!
• What Gramp thinks of pop musicians.
• Gramp struggles with the DVD Player.
• Sheldon has difficulty controlling his remote-controlled plane.
• Arthur has pinned his Christmas list on the fridge and he's going to make sure that everyone else knows about it.
• "AUTO-SAURUS REX!!"
• Sheldon suggests that he and Arthur give the lake they're in a name. Arthur replies that it already has a name. That name is...
  Arthur: "Lake Arthur Fantastico Supremo".
  (Beat)
  Arthur: I named it.
  Sheldon: (pretending to be shocked) No.
• "Can you PLEASE not give him "Super Choco Fudgies" Cereal for breakfast?"
• "You gotta admit, it's not natural for socks to do that."
  Gramp: You wanna deal with their attitude, YOU wash 'em.
• Gramp frying Arthur's brain.
  Arthur: BUT... PURCHASES... MAKE... DUCK... HAPPY...
• Dante tries his hand at some still life.
  Dante: My still life drawing sort of got away from me.
  Arthur: No, no... I think Godzilla holding a taco was a natural choice.
• Arthur has been stealing office supplies. It culminates in him STEALING A CHAIR FROM THE OFFICE.
  • And then he attempts to steal one of Sheldon's employees.
  • Sheldon tries to help him kick the habit. It doesn't work.
  • "Just give Gramp his teeth back."
• Sheldon pretends to be Wolverine.
• Dante is a superhero named Stickboy. He conquers all with his mighty stick.
• "It looks like our hero is starting to crack. Let's watch!"
• From a storyline in which Sheldonsoft's stock goes down...
  • Sheldon has a two-step plan to fix it. Step 1? Buy a monkey for the company. Step 2? Everyone laugh at the funny little monkey.
  • Arthur meets Zesto the Magnificent - who Sheldon summoned to fix the problem.
  • And he does! At least, he claims he does.
  • "AND LIKE MAGIC, ANOTHER LETTER FLOATS INTO THE ROOM!"
  • Arthur can do magic.
• Arthur realizes that he's naked all the time. This starts off a hilarious storyline involving Arthur deciding to get some clothes. Highlights include...
  • Arthur doesn't at ALL look like Danny Devito in formal wear.
  • "Don't clothes your mind to new possibilities!"
  • Sheldon asks how Arthur got the tie on when he doesn't have hands. According to Arthur, it took him three hours.
  Arthur: But the trickier part was how I got these undies on.
  Sheldon: NO ONE'S ASKING!
• One advantage to being a billionaire is that you get to buy pretty awesome Halloween decorations.
• Arthur eats all of the trick-or-treat candy. But he saved Sheldon a Tootsie Roll.
  Sheldon: Did you save it for me, OR DID YOU GET SO FAT YOU COULDN'T REACH IT??
  Arthur: A little from "Column A", a little from "Column B"...
  • The next day...
  Sheldon: I can't believe you ate all the Halloween candy!
  Arthur: I didn't mean to! Initially, I just ate one. And then I ate one more.
  Sheldon: AND THEN YOU ATE 48 MORE!
  Arthur: And then I ate 48 more.
  • "See? Now I'm sitting."
  • "I CAN'T JUST MAGICALLY FLY INTO THE KITCHEN!"
• "Put it on my bill."
• Gramp's attempts at Loophole Abuse when he goes on a liquid diet.
  • "Melted ice cream isn't technically a 'liquid'."
  Gramp: I KNOW! AND IT HAS COOKIE DOUGH CHUNKS!
  • "A Twinkie is a SOLID, not a LIQUID. And your 1976 blender can't change that fact."
  • It eventually culminates in Gramp somehow getting his hands on a beaker of hydro-chloric acid and pouring it on a steak in order to create liquid steak. It backfires spectacularly.
  Gramp: AIGH! MY GOOD CHINA!!
• "You're all tremendously huge nerds."
  Sheldon: MUST YOU RUIN IT EVERY TIME I WATCH STAR TREK?!
• From a series in which Sheldon's house is infested with a colony of ants...
  • "GIVE US CHEESECAKE. FRIDGE. THIRD SHELF. BEHIND THE MILK."
  Gramp: And their spy network is pretty good.
  Sheldon: As is their penmanship.
  • "MY EYEBALLS! THEY'RE IN MY EYEBALLS!"
  • "JOIN US. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE."
  Gramp: And now they're getting all cocky!
  • "AIGH! MY SHIRT!"
  Arthur: Not the pants, fellas, not the pants! Trust me on this one!
  • Arthur takes care of the ant problem - for a price.
  • "Look, I'm only one duck!"
• "Maaaaaaybe you've had enough chocolate milk..."
  Sheldon: IT'S THE ONLY THING KEEPING ME GOING!
  • From the same storyline, "We're experimenting with product placement."
• Arthur wishes that he had some cheesecake.
• Sheldon and Arthur go shopping for a new computer.
• Sheldon thinks that his teleporter would work better as a time machine.
• Arthur has to stop trying to swallow fish whole.
• And speaking of fish...
  Sheldon: What marketing genius came up with the name "fish stick"? Those two words should never be combined. "Do you enjoy fish, buy wish it had more of the down-home flavor of a stick?"
  Arthur: "Are you pining for more pine in your seafood?"
  Sheldon: "Why not branch out and try our new, treemendously tasty fish sticks!"
  Arthur: "Go on, give it a try - just for the halibut!!"
• "How 'bout them Red Sox?"
• The League of Extraordinary Nerds.
• Arthur meets Mister Pixie-Mix, the Pancake Fairy.
• Sheldon is getting a pair of shoes.
• "I've made a little diorama."
• From a storyline in which Sheldon gets a segway...
  • Sheldon is now a dork on wheels.
  • He's also a bit of a sucker for unnecessary technology.
  • Gramp's reaction to Sheldon buying a $4000 segway.
• Arthur regains his feathers after molting.
• "I suddenly have desire to buy bicycle for small American child!"
• "Side effects. Side effects. I also can't control my bladder. Side effects."
  Arthur: (dryly) Lovely.
• "They assured me this was the loudest, most annoying model I could buy."
  • And the next day...
• From a storyline in which Sheldon, Arthur and Gramp go on a road trip...
  • "Ah, the good ol' summer family roadtrip!"
  • "Travel America: See its gas stations."
  • Sheldon and Arthur play a rousing game of "Alphabet Bingo".
  • "The pool holds all the answers!"
  • They arrive the Grand Canyon.
  • "Can you run the Boston Marathon? Then don't even TRY to hike the Grand Canyon in one day."
  Sheldon: I love how he's still considering it.
  Arthur: YOU GET WINDED ON YOUR SECOND TRIP TO THE FRIDGE!
  • "Keep watching. This is how evolution happens."
  • "Oh man. This car smells like FOOT."
  • "It's $30 to get into Yellowstone National Park?"
  • It turns out that the park's backup rangers are the Power Rangers.
  • "Hold on, I need to fight this tree."
  • Gramp is throwing all of his hatred into the Yellowstone Hot Springs.
  • A bison is following Sheldon around.
  • "LIKE THE WIND, MAN! DRIVE LIKE THE WIND!"
  • "A cliff-hanger!"
  • Sheldon and Arthur discuss "Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper".
  • "Guess where I'VE been!"
  • "Goot eve-a-ning."
  • "Can't... feel... feet... and yet delicious shrimp... still calling... to me..."
• Arthur doesn't understand Japanese animation.
  Arthur: Why is there always a secondary character that grunts while the main character talks?
• "Dr. Zaius, look! He has precious RAZORS!"
• "Don't you DARE make a joke."
• "Gramp, I'd like you to meet Bobo the dancing circus bear."
• "Did you add the E-Stamp?"
  • The next day...
  Gramp: (to Sheldon) I sent you an e-mail! Me! All by myself!
• Gramp meets a mime.
• "Water scientists have done, like, water studies on it."
• The image of Arthur licking Sheldon's Oreos is funny enough, but it gets even better from there.
• "Are you spreading jelly ON the peanut butter??!?"
• This glorious Who's on First? routine.
• Dante's Halloween costume. He's a hatrack.
• Speaking of Halloween costumes, there's Arthur's. He's white trash.
  • And then he decides to dress as SHELDON.
• "MUST... TAKE... CANDY... BATH..."
• "Guess I might as well use it..."
• "Eat your own dang peas."
• Gramp goes to the Gap and meets an employee there that is going insane from having to listen to holiday music.
  "MIGHT I INTEREST ME IN SOME KHAKIS? WHY YES, THANK YOU!!"
• Arthur demonstrates to Sheldon that the song "Stayin' Alive" has the power to make anyone dance. And that includes Gramp.
• Arthur wants to know Gramp's "big Christmas secret".
• Dante plays the Christmas Porpoise in a Christmas Pageant with 76 kids and only so many costumes.
• When Arthur discovers that Gramp is planning on getting Sheldon a pet...
  Arthur: Why buy Sheldon another pet? I'm, like, the coolest pet ever.
  Gramp: You are. But he needs a NORMAL' pet! One that just plays and barks and waits by the door. He needs a pet that doesn't make fun of him for watching "Stargate".
  Arthur: But c'mon... it IS a pretty lame show.
  Gramp: SEE?
  • The next day, Arthur attempts to show Gramp how cute he is. It doesn't work.
  Arthur: Cwap.
• "Lookit me! Defying gravity!"
• Arthur teaches Oso tricks.
• If you wait too long to wash dishes, "life" begins to form in your sink.
• "I was designed in the bowels of Hell!"
• "You and I lead very different lives."
• "WHY SO MUCH GUILT WITH THE FREE SAMPLES?"
• "The ONE DAY I take the metro to work."
• Part of a storyline in which Arthur finds an egg and sits on it^note The egg, for those unaware, contains Flaco, Arthur's lizard son...
  Sheldon: Look, I agree with you. A duck NEEDS a nest for their egg. But... you're not in touch with your duck instincts, you know? No one's ever SHOWED you how to build a nest.
  Arthur: What are you trying to say?
  Sheldon: Most ducks don't use bean bags from IKEA.
  Arthur: Then most ducks are chumps. This puppy was $4.99.
  • The next day, Sheldon asks how long it'll take for the egg to hatch. Let's just say that Arthur has no idea and leave it at that.
• "That is AMAZING. This tree has totally lifted up the sidewalk."
• "You so just got Arthured."
  • "Now you're just Arthuring YOURSELF."
• Arthur has mastered the art of hovering.
• "Go on. I'm waiting for the snide comment."
• Sheldon is EL STAPLERO!
• "...Such a fine line between a trick rider and a TERRIFIED rider."
• "Approach the wild horse with CONFIDENCE."
• Arthur singing "Deep in the Heart of Texas".
• "What's the difference between a goblin and a HOBgoblin?"
• How to survive hellishly hot summer nights.
• A limerick about Youtube.
• Gramp believes that Wheat Thins are a diet food.
• "Is it ironic that the IKEA catalog is ten times sturdier than their actual furniture?"
• Gramp won't admit that he has a coffee addiction.
• Sheldon asks Gramp if any of their cousins are coming for Thanksgiving. Gramp says no, it's just them... and the duck... and the lizard... and the dog...
  Gramp: And I'm sure an orangutan, five turtles, and a Jack Russell Terrier.
  Arthur: I disinvited the orangutan... that dude still owes me, like, six grand.
• "This is unbelievably ridiculous."
• "GAAAAAH! MAKE YOUR COWBOY STORIES MAKE SENSE!"
• Arthur supplies the Balrog's frame of mind.
  Arthur: "RARR! I WANNA WATCH THE VIEW! RARR!"
• "Ni Hao, little grasshopper..."
• "I bet their battle cry was 'Nobody gets me.'"
• Gramp learns about the "Three Bites Diet".
• Arthur has a sip of coffee.
• "Ham."
• Sheldon and Dante are horrified to discover that pickles are in fact cucumbers.
  Sheldon: I've been eating a well-balanced diet all along... LIKE A CHUMP!
• "NO READING OUT LOUD."
• "Land of the Switzers?"
• "I'M IMMENSELY INTERESTING!"
• "I SHOULDN'T BE ABLE TO HEAR YOU BREATHING FROM FOUR BLOCKS DOWN!"
• "The scientific name of the dinosaur is 'the supersaurus'."
  • "Dude, I way 4.95 tons."
    • "SITTING is my super-power."
• Arthur isn't really built for the Wii.
• After finding out that the velociraptor had feathers, Sheldon starts to wonder if ALL dinosaurs had feathers, then what a t-rex would look like with feathers.
• One storyline begins with Gramp pointing out to an employee at Starbucks that the name of the shop should have an apostrophe in it - because it's named after the character Starbuck from Moby-Dick, it should be "Starbuck's". The employee replies by threatening to give his coffee to somebody else.
  • The next day, the employee tells Gramp that they won't be serving him coffee ever again simply because he brought up the fact that the name should have an apostrophe in it.
• This strip, which perfectly summarizes what a trip to IKEA is like.
• One Halloween costume that Sheldon apparently considered is a Pokémon character he made up using math.
  "DODECAHEDRON!"
• "Disneyyy is gonna milk this property for all it's worrrth..."
• Sheldon meets the Living Embodiment of Wikipedia.
• "Is a television steam-powered?"
• "I'm moderately whelmed."
• "I shall make it a date!"
• "Daddy's a massive dork."
• Arthur reads about blue whales.
• Arthur invites a Douglas Fir Tree to defend eBooks.
• "Why are you looking at us like that? Go watch your stupid show."
• "Flaco, my son: SECURE THE PANCAKES!"
• "I love that chicken dish. Best dish we have. CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN."
• Arthur randomly singing "Rapper's Delight".
• The entirety of this strip, but especially the panel where Ant-Man shows up. And it's even better now that Captain America, Doctor Strange, and Ant Man have indeed gotten movies.

"I am Ant Man! My power is to shrink down to ant size! Which is a totally useful crime-fighting power, right?

Also, my costume is TOTALLY not dated!"

• "How do you pronounce this word: e-n-s-e-m-b-l-e?"
• Gramp's rant about Blu-Ray.
• "Super sassy color SPLASH!"
• "Do ducks normally TALK? Do ducks normally KNOW junk? Do ducks normally SING famous show tunes?"
• The top of Sheldon's head peeking out of the water in this strip is amusing enough, but Arthur's rant makes it even better.
  Arthur: My new game? "Ten-Pound Ham Toss... the lawn game for kids."
  • "Who came up with horseshoes??"
• If Arthur spreads out his feet just right, he has just enough surface tension to stand on water.
  • And the next day...
  • And then Flaco wants to get in on the fun.
• "Must... choose... most... obnoxious response..."
• Gramp explains how a microwave works.
  Arthur: "Food particles" was the best bit.
• Books 'n kids in the internet age.
  • From the same storyline...
  Arthur: So, with this library reading contest, how do they TEST you to make sure you really read books?
  Sheldon: (reading a book) They don't.
  Arthur: They DON'T? They don't quiz you or anything?
  Sheldon: Nope.
  (Arthur smiles like an idiot)
  Sheldon: Your smile is creepin' me out.
  Arthur: In life, you either lead, follow, or circumnavigate the whole process.
  • "Can't... resist... super-dated special effects... surprisingly... awesome. NNNGH."
• "Spatula."
• "Why not develop some sort of PIT-SOCK, soaking up offendables all day long?"
• Arthur doesn't believe that Brachiosaurs were vegetarians.
  Arthur: Those dudes were huge. You don't build up that much mass just eatin' LEAVES.
• "New VELCRO! For dudes!"
• "Enough with the dang pony."
• From a storyline in which Sheldon, in an effort to save his company, goes to Dubai to ask for a loan...
  • Gramp has reached the point where nothing surprises him anymore.
  • Arthur is having difficulty handling the desert heat because he, unlike Flaco, is hot-blooded.
• How "Weight Watchers" works.
• Sheldon and Arthur talk about chimps.
• Gramp doesn't know what a Blu-Ray disc is.
  • And the next day...
• Gramp is a cast-iron pan. He's seasoned by life.
  Arthur: Also: unwashed.
• Sheldon and Arthur talk about giraffes and evolution.
  Arthur: Hey - did science ever figger out why giraffes evolved so basketball-player tall? Was it because of high leaves in the tall trees? 'Cause if so, why not just stay short and evolve a ladder, instead?
  Sheldon: Wait... what? How do you "evolve a ladder"??
  Arthur: You, uh... you take a nearby thing, and you slowly evolve it into something else.
  Sheldon: That makes no sense. Explain how I'd "evolve" this water into a ladder?
  (Beat)
  Arthur: (whispering) I think we've figured out why giraffes didn't evolve a ladder.
  Sheldon: A big win for science.
• Sheldon and Arthur recite a poem clearing up the reasons for eggnog's disgustingness.
• "Lord Sauron finds your gingerbread structure wanting."
• How to have Christmas start at 6 AM.
• Three words: UNEXPECTED YOGURT CANNONBALL.
• Arthur and Flaco demonstrate why you can't team-read a "Choose Your Own Adventure" book.
• "Do you realize how insulting that is?"
• Arthur gets into an elevator with a man who has a fear of ducks.
  • And then it gets stuck.
  • Then the man discovers that Arthur can talk and starts freaking out even more.
  • Arthur tries to help the man overcome his fear of ducks.
  "Four... mallards in... my... shorts."
• On "Point Watchers", you're constantly looking for foods that fill you up, but have low points. But you can't eat the same four foods forever, so you stay on the lookout for new, low-point foods... but it can get out of hand.
  Gramp: Cardboard's edible, right?
  Arthur: (thinking to himself) Don't say no. Don't say no. See where this goes.
  • Speaking of "Point Watchers", you can EARN more food points by exercising, as Gramp demonstrates.
  Gramp: COME ON, LIFE.
• Gramp discovers that Arthur has been driving his car.
  • "You can NOT drive my car."
• Sheldon is ticked-off at Arthur for something that he did in a dream. Specifically...
  Sheldon: In my dream you had fourteen camels and you wouldn't give me one and then you flew them to the moon and left me in Maine and you were a jerk.
  • And in the next strip...
  Gramp: Why wouldn't you let me feed your Pegasus at the 1910 World's Fair??
  Arthur: COME ON.
• From a storyline in which Arthur and Flaco go to Hawaii...
  • "I ain't seein' the cockpit, am I?"
  • Arthur goes snorkeling.
  • "You know what?? I'M ON VACATION. The English language can cram it."
  • "Hawaii is famous for having the most mico-climates on Earth."
  • "It says 'KARL'."
• Gramp asks Oso if he wants to go for "walkies".
• "Dang, man. JUST LET ME HAVE THIS."
• "The thing with the blinky and the red flashy."
  • And the next day, we get Sheldon explaining to Gramp why the mail-merge on his computer isn't working.
  "Give back the dang shrimp, Excel!"
• "YES IS NOT AN ANSWER!"
• Sheldon tries to get Oso to sit.
• "You, my friend, are a truthsayer."
• Arthur has realized what it takes to be a successful fantasy novelist.
• Arthur points out that there's one problem with Aquaman's power to command sea life. It might be handy if he's by the water, but what criminals capture him in Montana?
  (Gilligan Cut to a giant squid and a sperm whale, both very exhausted, crawling across dry land)
  Giant Squid: Just... 800... more miles... to go...
  Sperm Whale: I HATE YOU SO MUCH, AQUAMAN.
  • The next day, Sheldon points out that there was a moment in that strip that could've been handled better. So instead, the giant squid chews out the sperm whale for using the word "hate", and the sperm whale says this:
  Sperm Whale: I DISLIKE YOU SO MUCH I COULD POP YOU IN THE CAKE-HOLE, AQUAMAN.
• "ZIS EEZ WHAT I DO."
  • "AND IF YOU SAY IT'S BECAUSE USING VIGOR ALONE BECOMES VIGOROUS I WILL BE ALL UP IN YOUR BUSINESS."
• "I shouldn't need an art contest to tell me if I'm any good or not."
• "When I got my pug, I was told that 'they only shed once a year.' I now realize this is true. They DO shed only twice a year: once throughout the first six months, and again throughout the second six months."
• "I come in search of knightly games!"
  • From the same storyline, we have Arthur having fun with homophones.
  • Apparently, Arthur let Flaco pick their names.
• Arthur discovers that safety pins spontaneously generate in hallway drawers - people don't BUY them. He's also discovered that his new outfit is pretty rockin'.
• Arthur sings "Ten Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed"... then starts to wonder what the heck the backstory to that song is.
  • He then proceeds to write down all of his problems with the song.
  "Ten (Ten? It's hard enough to get ONE monkey! Ten??) little monkeys jumpin' (Believable. Monkeys do love jumpin'.) on the bed,
  One fell (Also believable. But to have them ALL fall off, sequentially? There's an odd causality at work, there.) off and bumped his head.
  Mama (This is where it gets weird - WHOSE mama? The monkey's mama? If so, why the unnecessary clarification in Line One? A human mama wouldn't say "ten little humans" jumpin' on the bed, so why would a monkey? And if she's NOT the monkey's mama, why in the world does she have monkeys in a house with kids?? Dangerous!)called the doctor
  And the doctor (Okay, A) You'd call a vet. And B) Why does this doctor seem unfazed with this whole situation?? Were there previous conversations between he and Mama? Or is he one of those jaded, "I've-been-in-medicine-40-years-and-I've-seen-everything" doctors?) said
  'No more monkeys jumpin' on the bed' (Yeah, great, awesome. Thanks for the hot tip, Captain Brilliant.)"
• Arthur points out how weird it is that English still uses phrases from the Steam Age.
  Arthur: (to Gramp) That's GOTTA make you feel better about your vocabulary.
  Gramp: Scram, you. I don't take sass from two-bit murgatroids.
• From a storyline in which Arthur is sued for libel by a Mr. Lord Biggles Chiggles...
  • Sheldon assembles all forty-nine of his "Sheldonsoft" corporate lawyers to help Arthur win the lawsuit. Then Arthur asks how many of them know ENGLISH laws. The reply does not fill him with confidence.
  • Gramp books their flight to London. And per Arthur's request, he made sure to get them a flight with video games in the seats (it's a nine-hour flight!).
  • Upon arriving, Gramp tells the others that they can get to London via fast-train in Paddington. This causes Sheldon and Arthur to assume that they have the chance to meet Paddington Bear. Then they ask if they can also visit Hogwarts and see Peter Pan.
  • "And THAT'S my complete philosophy on fig-based food products."
• Flaco's Halloween costume.
• "Then let the battle begin! For nothing can stop me!"
• "You've had enough dang pie."
• Arthur talks about the universe.
• "PanCAAKE."
  • Speaking of pancakes...
• Arthur wants to know who Gramp is the "Secret Santa" for.
• "LAY DOWN MORE DANG TRACK!"
• Arthur writes a letter to Almond Butter.
  • And the next day, he writes a letter to PEANUT Butter.
  • Then he invents "Mega Butter".
• Arthur attempts to use an iPhone.
  • Eventually, he comes up with a new method... with some help from Flaco.
  Arthur: "My dearest Shakira..."
  Sheldon: NO! I'm literally covered in spit.
• Sheldon tells Dante about the "Sarcasm Mark".
• Gramp orders a pizza online.
• "I'm waitin' for you to order a dang ALBANIAN pancake or something."
• Arthur finds out that the Green Lantern's weakness is the color yellow.
• Arthur pretends to be Luke Skywalker's snowspeeder.
• "I am FAR MORE efficient in my awesomeness."
• Gramp will not run a washing machine that isn't one hundred percent full.
• "This is not a duck."
• Arthur and Flaco have a "spontaneous awesome-off".
  • Eventually, Arthur needs to sit down... but he must do it in a suitably-awesome way.
• Gramp is baking cookies.
• Arthur got a letter in the mail, and he's going to make sure that Sheldon and Dante know it.
• "MIGHT I SPEAK WITH YOU GENTS AT THE FRONT DOOR?"
• Arthur, Flaco and Oso have come to an agreement - instead of cranking up the heat, they'll all take turns sitting on Gramp's head to keep warm.
• "Ain't foolin' anyone, peaches."
  • And the next day, Arthur has him try out a NEW sales pitch on Flaco. It works!
• Sheldon's bath toy.
• "It's a LAND LOBSTER."
  Arthur: BUT... "Landlobster" sorta sounds like a nice Wisconsin family if you say it fast enough: "I'm Gene Landlobster, this here's my wife, Tootie Landlobster, and these rugrats are the little Landlobsters."
• Even among the Transformers, there are massively huge nerds. What makes it even better is that the Nerd Transformer looks like a character from Futurama.
• Arthur sings a song about a chair.
• Arthur signs up for match-harmony.com.
  Sheldon: Internet dating? Really? Won't that be... tricky? Once ladies... see... your... actual... photo?
  Arthur: No. Yeah. You don't gotta say it. I hear ya. I already Photoshopped the wart off my foot.
  • Answering questions for the site takes a very long time, as Arthur discovers.
  • "Are you basically looking to date a tub of ice cream? Like, an ACTUAL tub?"
  Arthur: (whispering to Sheldon) They're on to me.
  • Eventually, the site manages to find a possible match for Arthur. Specifically, a chicken.
  • He calls the site to complain.
• Flaco ate Arthur's "ham sammich".
  • The next day, Sheldon and Arthur discuss Arthur's referring to sandwich as "sammich".
  Sheldon: English is sort of a language that looks at life and goes "Mehhh."
• Gramp has difficulty with Twitter.
  • But eventually, he gets the hang of it... more or less.
  Arthur: It's not THAT micro a micro-blogging service!!!
• Flaco does some weightlifting.
  Arthur: It'd be WAY more impressive if it wasn't six coffee lids on a straw.
• Punctuation marks that never caught on.
• Gramp is doing interpretive dance.
  • Wait for it. Wait for it. Wait for it...
• "ACTIVELY DRINKING COFFEE WHILE WE TALK."
• What's really being said between you and your dentist.
• Arthur reads the instructions of a box of frozen pizza.
• How to tell if you're a massive geek.
• Arthur flies onto Gramp's head and...
• "Best friends! Best friends!"
  • "Lookit me! Lookit me!"
  • "Let's play! Let's play!"
• Arthur decides that knitting needs a slogan.
  • "I know what this needs. You know what this needs? I'll TELL you what this needs."
  • Extreme Knitting.
  • Eventually, Arthur gets carried away with the knitting...
  • Even Gramp gets a cozy!
• "That was MY dang cookie."
• Sheldon admits that he kinda doesn't understand Transformers.
• Arthur wants a device that makes instant Indian food.
  • The next day, he attempts to invent that device.
• Has Dante given any thought as to what he's going to do with the mud pies that he's making? The answer is YES. Yes he has.
• The answer to the question that all pug-owners have been wondering...
• Gramp has a sign up that says "Garage Sale"... yet, he's holding the sale on the lawn.
  • "I'll give you seven cents for this apple!"
  • "You take 20 cents for it?"
• Sheldon is using his imagination.
• Arthur doesn't understand the name of the Nebraska Cornhuskers.
  • Then Gramp finds out that their ORIGINAL name was "The Bug Eaters".
• Gramp is annoyed by Oso's near-constant barking.
• The next day, he remembers what Arthur said in the previous strip.
  Gramp: NO! NOT ON THE HALLWAY RUG!
• It's time to play "Spot Where The Lyricist Kinda Went Off-Track: Frank Sinatra Edition"!
• How do you send astronauts to Mars? Arthur has the answer.
• Sheldon and Arthur realize just how ridiculous the word "Eighth" is.
  Sheldon: It's totally ridiculous. How many H's do we need in there?
  Arthur: Well how are we supposed to spell it? Aith? Ayth?
  Sheldon: That's just it. English spelling rules are totally chaotic.
  Arthur: It's like ten dudes orderin' toppings for one pizza: it's loud... messy... and everyone's bummed how it turned out.
• Arthur wants to be a moa.
  Arthur: (standing on Gramp's head) "Oh, tough guy wants some moa, eh? I'll give you moa."
  Gramp: Get off my head.
  Arthur: "WHO ELSE WANTS SOME MOA?" MO-AAA.
• Sheldon and Arthur are thinking about human migration.
• "Should I have a cookie?"
• "Arthur has poked you."
• "I'm just sayin' he's not the BEST choice for the campaign."
• Arthur finds out that Gramp is going to start using "these coffee-pod things".
• Arthur meets a bird who is pecking at nothing.
  "ARE YOU THE DUMBEST."
• Oso is Batpug.
• "JOOOOOIN USSSS. STOPPP FLOSSSING."
• Gramp is starting a quest to find THE BEST CUP OF COFFEE IN TOWN.
• "Good shopkeep! I seek the finest coffee among your offerings!"
• "DON'T YOU TAKE THIS FROM ME, TV. DON'T YOU DO IT."
• Any time you tuck in a turkey, someone says, "Phoo! That tryptophan has tired me out." But there's ALWAYS the know-it-all cousin who's gotta be "That Guy"...
• Gramp discovers the "Neti Pot".
  • Speaking of the "Neti Pot", the next strip has Arthur pointing out that the concept of it sounds like it was thought up by "an old mountain hick".
  "Oh thassa snoot squirtin'."
• "Are you SUPPOSED to smell like a naked mole rat with a glandular problem?"
• Arthur talks about the scientific word for kneecap - "Patella".
  Arthur: Sounds like an Italian dish, to me, "Patella". "Oh, the Patella, madame? Exquisite! It is chef's masterpiece, the Patella. He drizzles the Patella in a white wine reduction, then serves it on a bed of orzo. It's our #1 item... the Patella."
  Gramp: STOP TALKING ABOUT PATELLAS.
  Arthur: "Oh indeed, madame! Who can stop talking about our Patellas..."
• "THAT BETTER BE YOUR BRUSH."
  • It gets even funnier the next day.
• Gramp gets insecure about recycling.
• "It's time to kick back and relax!"
• Gramp doesn't know what an AT-AT is called.
• Arthur and Flaco read The Monster at the End of This Book.
• Arthur and Flaco decide to become a superhero.
  "EAT IT, [[Comic Book/Aquaman AQUAMAN]]!"
• Sheldon's home.
• For whatever reason, Flaco is REALLY SENSITIVE about Arthur Breaking the Fourth Wall.
• The secret history of kale.
• Sheldon thinks that it'll be awesome when science is able to bring back the woolly mammoth. Gramp disagrees.
• Gramp has a fever of 104. And it's making him hallucinate.
• Gramp thinks that the pizza delivery boy is judging him.
• "NERDS, THEIR TALK PAINFUL."
• Oso has a sailor suit on and Arthur is giving him a hard time about it.
• Arthur points out that the word "butterfly" makes no sense as a word.
• This strip, showing off the "George Lucas Swimsuit Line", was more gross than it was funny. But it led to this strip, which is HILARIOUS.
• Gramp's diet suggests that he try "cauliflower mashed potatoes".
  Arthur: What, you mix cauliflower into your mashed potatoes?
  Gramp: No, you make "mashed potatoes" out of cauliflower.
  Arthur: But that's not mashed potatoes. THAT'S NOT MASHED POTATOES AT ALL.
  Gramp: Why does me eating healthy so often involve someone lying to me?
  Arthur: THAT'S NOT MASHED POTATOES AT ALL.
• "Hey! You're a pug!"
• Arthur just tried Thai sweet chili sauce for the first time.
  • The next day gives us Arthur's opinion on ranch dressing.
• It doesn't matter how much Flaco tries. That TRON light-cycle ain't appearing.
• "YOU SWIM LIKE MY NIGHTMARES."
• MORE punctuation marks that never caught on.
• Gramp and Arthur discover "Easter Candy Corn".
• "Snap-a-doo: it is WINDY today."
• "God forbid we take two seconds and HAND WASH the dang knives."
• Gramp's back went out - can you spot when he's finally given up?
• Flaco saw Arthur's post on Facebook. He didn't like it, though.
  • "And hey, look. There's my posted pic. Showin' up in your stream."
• How Flaco photobombs.
• The first swim of spring.
• "Make up YOUR OWN stories! Invent YOUR OWN worlds!"
• Flaco meets another lizard while in the desert - specifically, a horned lizard.
• Camping at the beach requires a "Yes" to all these questions...
• Gramp is making brownies.
• Things that confuse a pug...
• Sheldon doesn't wanna play Hamlet.
• Emily meets Arthur.
• "We've established a little pattern, he and I."
• Li'l Butter has been served dinner, but he doesn't seem to understand what he's supposed to DO with it.
• Gramp has a dog on his head.
• "Mr. Moon, what are YOU doing out? It's 3 PM!"
• Arthur doesn't get narwhals.
  Arthur: In what evolutionary scenario does a whale need a WEAPON? They pickin' up park litter down there? WHAT POSSIBLE USE IS IT?
  • The next day, he's STILL talking about narwhals.
• The lies we hope dinner guests believe.
• "Why do people still believe the lie that we 'only use ten-percent of our brains'?"
• Arthur writes a letter to The Netherlands.
• "Sheldon got some KEEEEEEEESH."
• Why garages were invented.
• "So.... New Zealand. That's a place that exists."
• "So many new nooks 'n' crannies. SO MANY."
• Arthur overthinks Angry Birds.
• Arthur meets a square-toothed rattlesnake.
• "ATTENTION, WORLD. IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT REGARDING HOW HOT I AM."
• Arthur loves it when tightly-wound people go on vacation.
• Gramp finds out about Starbucks' eggnog latte.
• Arthur wrote a Christmas-List app.
• "Does Spring sprung, or does Spring sprang?"
• Arthur uses his word balloons to keep dry during a rainstorm.
• "This where the garage sale is?"
  • And here's the aftermath of the garage sale...
• "I am the night. I am justice. I am vengeance."
  • "Only his resolve can save the city."
• Gramp would like to speak with Arthur about his... editorializing.
• "Why did you WAY over-pack all MY stuff during the move?"
• After Lil' Butter gets stuck in a tree and the gang gets him out...
  Sheldon: Thank goodness! Now we gotta make sure he never does it again.
  Emily: Oh don't worry: Lil' Butter never makes the same mistake twice.
  (Cut to that night. Lil' Butter gets stuck in the tree again)
  Lil' Butter: Maow.
• Arthur notices that Gramp has little holes in his nose - pores, in other words.
• Arthur sings that "Rain, Rain, Go Away" song...
• "CRY HAVOC! AND LET SLIP THE DOGS OF WAR."
• Arthur wants somebody to push him on the swings.
• Oso usually greets Sheldon when he gets home from school - but Sheldon had to go to the library, so he asked Arthur to read some notecards to him.
• "And what's with that hat?"
• Gramp has one nostril that's WAAAY bigger than the other one, as Arthur points out.
• "JUST CLICK LIKE."
• What would happen if Dora the Explorer processed all FedEx packages.
• Sheldon and Arthur talk about Leonardo Da Vinci.
• Sheldon points out that humans took wolves, bred them over 20,000 years, and made dogs.
• Sheldon returns home from school and greets Oso.
• "You seen those DVD packs where you also get a Blu-ray and free download OF THE SAME MOVIE? Who's that for?"
• "THREE MOVIES, Newly-Thin Peter Jackson? THREE?"
• "FREE Popsicles for fish?"
  • The next day...
• How to keep all the ice cream for yourself.
• Judgement Pug is judging. you.
• "WHAT ARE WE EVEN TALKING ABOUT?"
• "ACTING."
• Sucks being a tree sloth.
• "Can you hear that? It's the sound of a million Japanese mailmen screaming in frustration."
• Sheldon and Arthur play "Marco Polo".
• "You got bats."
  • "This got weird."
  • "Have Sheldon do it! THIS is why people have kids!"
• Arthur and Flaco play with LEGOS.
• Arthur's cosplay for Theatre-Con. The goofy grin on his face is what makes it.
  • From the same storyline...
  "Have some pride, man."
  • "Ice-cold Stella! Five bucks."
• The return of Batpug!
• "What if our moon... HAD ITS OWN MOON?"
• Arthur wishes that he had a time machine.
• Arthur and Flaco find an empty turtle shell - and this is what they decide to do with it. Eventually, they wind up stuck on their back.
• Gramp buys deodorant.
  Gramp: Is it preposterous that a man might also like to smell like "fresh linen"? IS IT?
• How to deal with life's trickier moments, according to Arthur? Two words: VIDEO GAMES.
• Sheldon and Dante try to pronounce "Smaug".
• Sheldon claims that a book is like "a friend you carry with you". Arthur finds this comment lame and makes sure that Sheldon knows it.
• "You know what goes great with coffee?"
• Sheldon decorates the Christmas tree.
• Arthur realizes something.
• Emily enlists the help of Sheldon and Dante with getting ready for the Chinese New Year. This week is "The Week of the Mop".
• Sometimes, Gramp looks into Oso's eyes, and he sees beauty in them. Beauty and genuine WISDOM. Actually...
  Oso: (thinking to himself) Durrrrrrrrrrp.
• "Noticed you haven't answered our emails."
• Gramp gets the coolest, stream-of-thought ideas when he's soakin' in the tub.
• How to build your own pug.
• Gramp has a secret power - as the tallest person in the house, he has the power to hide things WAAAAY up high. Such as Choco-Fudgies, for example. There's just one problem with this: Arthur, who also lives in the house, can FLY.
  Arthur: (standing on top of the fridge) SHELDON! THERE'S "FATTY CHUNKLINS" UP HERE! HE'S ALSO BEEN HIDIN' "FATTY CHUNKLINS".
  Sheldon: Bring them. Bring these things of which you speak.
• Spring has sprung. What really makes it is Sheldon's horrified reaction in the fourth panel.
• Arthur needs Sheldon to like something on Facebook.
• "MUST THE YELLING FILL OUR LIVES?"
• Sheldon found a stick. Dante, meanwhile, found a great rock.
• Dante shows Sheldon the MOST satisfying thing in human life.
  Dante: The thoop sells it.
• To be honest, Sheldon DOES look like a naked mole rat in the fifth panel.
• Sheldon, Arthur and Flaco are playing "Dinosaur Dogs". They're dogs who are also dinosaurs!
• Speaking of dogs, here Sheldon shows Arthur something neat with a rare breed of dog known as the Himalayan Squishie.
  • Also part of this little storyline is a strip where Arthur takes advantage of how many folds there are on the dog.
• Today Arthur saw a tow truck towing another tow truck.
• "I'M A PIECE OF WORK!"
• Gramp treats his body like a temple.
• "All aboard the hug train!"
  • "COME ON."
• Arthur getting swarmed by a flock of little red birds.
  • Eventually they all fly off.
• Gramp encounters the Coffee Mafia. The entire storyline is just so STRANGE and ludicrous that it's hard not to find it funny.
• This is how it happens.
• Sheldon sings "Walking in a Winter Wonderland".
  Arthur: WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING.
• Sheldon and Arthur discuss hash browns.
• Arthur has an important announcement.
• You may not realize it, but your dog has superpowers. As does your cat.
• How lazy is Gramp?
• Pecking order.
  • And just what are those birds doing? Not just pecking at nothing - They're stealing cable.
• Arthur tells Sheldon an interesting fact about blue whales.
• "Y'all SENG."
• Dave Kellett tells us why he's always been freaked-out by Mickey Mouse.
• "Hello! I'd like to return this shirt that smells like foot..."
• Sheldon tells Arthur that they're going to do some time-traveling, leading to a Lampshade Hanging of how little Sheldon's company is brought up nowadays.
  • After traveling back in time, the gang gets on a train... which Arthur believes is the Hogwarts Express.
  • After meeting J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis, Sheldon finds out that Lewis keeps encouraging Tolkien to write more of Tom Bombadil. His reaction is priceless.
  • They return to the present hoping that they haven't changed the future. As a matter of fact, they did - Oso can talk now.
• "Countries are basically 8-year-old boys."
• "Surely there's more to a pug's life than just SLEEPING."
• Netflix presents: the bottom of the barrel. The caricatures of Chandler, Ross and Joey in particular are hilarious.
  Joey: How YOU doin'?
  MODOK: MODOK DOES NOT SWING THAT WAY!
• Gramp lists things that do indeed taste as good as thin feels.
• Gramp thinks that LEGO pieces are too specific these days.
• "It's naan-negotiable."
• This strip, detailing the anatomy of a rooster, gives us this:
  "This is a tiny Velociraptor. We eat tiny Velociraptors at KFC, people."
• Sheldon tells Oso to cool it with the shedding. Can Oso do that? SPOILER ALERT: NO.
• Space museum.
• "Is that supposed to be a RHYME?"
• Gramp notices that Arthur has little holes on the side of his beak.
• Gramp tries to get Sheldon to eat his broccoli by saying that Batman eats it.
• If Dave Kellett were a character in The Chronicles of Narnia, it would've been a twenty-page book.
• "History's so full of them tricky FACTS."
• "HE UNDERDANDS MY WUBBB."
• Gramp has cereal for lunch.
• This strip doubles as a "Hidden Pictures" puzzle. Can you find everything?
• Gramp's reaction to winning a trip to the Fatty Chunklins Chocolate Plant.
• Yet another strip about how much of a coffee addict Gramp is.
• Dave Kellett has a complicated relationship with the cookie industry.
• The anatomy of a koala.
• At Swim Camp, Dante gets really excited when he sees Sheldon without his glasses on. Sheldon is annoyed, but then he gets to see Dante's eyes (as do we for the first time)...
• Oso talks to another dog.
  "I AM STANDING ON CEMENT!"
• "Still gotta eat them broccoli."
• "It's a bird! It's a plane!"
• Oso talks to another dog... in the rain this time.
  "I AM WET!"
• [[http://www.sheldoncomics.com/archive/170215.html Arthur finds out about the Oort Cloud.
  "People of Earth! We mean you no harm! We are Oorts from the Oort Cloud! And here are our little Oortlings! OORT OORT OORT."
• Arthur's reaction to that "Stone Soup" story: "Sooo... we're just gonna ignore that there's A ROCK in this?"
• Why does Gramp have a flask when he doesn't drink?
• Arthur believes that Gramp scooped more ice cream for Sheldon than he did for him.
• The Anatomy of the Bony-Eared Assfish. Every little "factoid" - if you can call them that - is just pointing out how baffling the name of this fish is.
  "The bony-eared assfish: making you feel better about your life since 1915."
• "No matter how small you are... you can be super annoying on the internet."
• "THEY GO TO BED EVERY NIGHT NOT EATING ICE CREAM THEY OWN."
• "THERE'S NO GOOD WAY TO MAKE FIRST CONTACT WITH ALIENS."
• Sheldon and Dante discuss "reptile guys".
  Dante: And they're all named Dale.
  Sheldon: They ARE all named Dale.
  Dante: Vaguely creepy Dales.
• Arthur and Gramp discuss Chewbacca. Meanwhile...
• Arthur goes after Gramp for his fat. Yet again.
• "Together, twins Bruce and Bryce Wayne are: THE Batman BROTHERS!"
• Arthur talks about the galaxy.
• What are the fastest animals?
• When your dog goes nuts barking the DAY, it's okay. When they do it at NIGHT...
• How exactly did the narwhal get its iconic horn?
• The Tree Pugs of Madagascar.
• "TELL ME AGAIN ABOUT THE BIRBS."
• "You humans think you're so smart."
• HOW DOG DOG?]
• [[sheldoncomics.com/archive/180326.html Sheldon shares an interesting fact about the fennec fox]].
• Arthur would love for someone to walk a mile in his shoes.
• "How come superheroes have COOL alter-ego names?"
• Arthur meets a peregrine falcon.
• A spider has infinite choices of where to build its web...
• Behold Arthur's mind-reading powers!