Funny / Rush Hour (1998)

• Carter doing his victory dance after blowing up Clive's C4-equipped car with Another Part of Me in the background had everyone in knots and doubles as a Moment of Awesome.
  • Carter being confronted over the C-4:
    Captain Diel: Two officers were shot, one man lost a pinkie!
    Carter: But didn't nobody die!
    Captain Diel: You destroyed half a city block!
    Carter: That block was already messed up.
    Captain Diel: And you lost a lot of evidence!
    Carter: We still got a little bit left.
• The first day we see Soo Yung going to school in America (granted, two months after she and her father moved to L.A.), she's quite exuberantly singing Mariah Carey's "Fantasy" in the back of the car. The looks on the faces of her bodyguards in the front seats are just hilarious.
• Lee pretends he can't speak English: When Carter asks him, Lee sports a dorky grin.
  Carter: Please tell me you speak English. I'm Detective Carter, Do you speaka any English? DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMIN' OUTTA MY MOUTH?!
• When Carter calls his captain to complain about the "bullshit" assignment, it's revealed that a good chunk of the force is in the same room, listening over the speaker and snickering:
  Carter: Captain, I don't think this is funny. No, I'm serious, Captain. Tell the FBI you made a mistake.
  Captain Diel: I can't do that. I'm sure that you and Mr. Lee will have a nice time together.
  Carter: I'm warning you, you better call them or I drop his ass at Panda Express.
  Captain Diel: You drop this case, Carter, you're suspended for two months without pay.
  Carter: Aight, you can forget about being mayor then.
  Johnson: Congratulations, Carter. Looks like you finally got yourself a partner. (hangs up; everyone in Diel's office bursts out laughing)
• After Carter finds out Lee can speak English, Carter spins into his car, and Lee imitates the move, only fancier. Carter responds: "I'm gonna kick yo ass. Don't nobody do that but me. You want me to kick your ass, don't you?"
• The scene with Carter's car radio:
  Lee: (Surfin' USA plays) Ah! Beach Boys!
  (Beat)
  Carter: Oh, hell no! You didn't just touch my goddamn radio!
  Lee: The Beach Boys are great American music.
  Carter: The Beach Boys gonna get you a great ass whuppin'. Don't you ever touch a black man's radio, boy! You can do that in China, but you can get your ass killed out here, man! Let me show you real music.
  [He changes the song to Jay-Z's "Can I Get A..."]
  Carter: Yeah, that's real music. You hear that?
  [He starts moving his head like a snake, while Lee gives him a funny look]
  Carter: Now can you do that to the Beach Boys? Can you do that to the Beach Boys? Hell no!
• The chat between Carter and the "ciga-weed" man in the bar, with Carter taking his cigarette and the poor guy stuck his hand out until moments after Lee beats the crap out of everyone in the pool area, Lee himself takes the man's last cigarette and says "That's bad for you!"
  • Carter faking his cousin Luke that he doesn't know him.
  • Lee drops an N-bomb in imitation of Carter's style. Problem is, Carter (a black man) said it to some nearby "homies". Lee (not a black man) said it to a black bartender. Hilarity Ensues.
• When Carter and Lee visit Clive in prison, the guard tells the white Clive, "Your two brothers are here to see you."
  • Later in the scene:
    Clive: I don't know anything about that, so you can kiss my fat ass.
    Carter: Clive, it'd take me all day to kiss your fat ass, man.
• WAR!
  Carter: Man, you don't know nothing about no War.
  Lee: Everybody knows War. (singing) Huh! Yeah! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! Good God, you all!
  Carter: It ain't 'you all', it's "y'all"!
  Lee: Yaw.
  Carter: Y'all!
  Lee: Yaw!
  Carter: Man, you sound like a Karate movie, y'all!
  Lee: Yoll.
• Carter arguing with the Chinese food vendor.
  Carter: Damn, Chin, this some greasy shit. You ain't got no better food, like some chicken wings, some baby back ribs, some fries or something?
  Chin: Chinese food, no soul food here!
  Carter: I didn't say nothin' 'bout no soul food, I said you got some better food. I don't want that greasy shit. How you gonna sell a big box of grease?
  (Chin complains in Chinese)
  Carter: (turns) I'm chinny-a-what?
  Lee: (grabs Carter) Come on!
  Chin: I'm no punk bitch!
  Carter: I ain't no punk bitch, neither!
  Chin: I'm no punk bitch!
  Carter: I'm about to knock that hat off your head, Chin.
  • What's funny about the last parts of that exchange is that the vendor brought up the "punk bitch" line for nothing because he misheard and assumed Carter called him the supposed insult.
• Carter gives Lee his badge so that he can pose as LAPD if anything goes wrong. Lee takes a look at the bug-eyed, enormously grinning photo of Chris Tucker and isn't so sure:
  Lee: This won't work. I am not 6'1".
• Carter pretending to be Juntao's lawyer at the Chinese restaurant:
  Carter: I'm here for a meeting with Mr. Juntao.
  Waitress: I'm sorry, I don't know Mr. Juntao.
  Carter: Maybe you don't understand. I'm Mr. Juntao's lawyer. Legal adviser. He got into some shit again. I'm a very busy man. I ain't got time to be coming down here. My wife wants me to come home, my baby's shitting all over the house. Would you please get Mr. Juntao?
  Waitress: But I have already told you, I don't know-
  Carter: You think I came here for nothing? You gonna give me gas money? You got $5 on you? Would you please go tell Mr. Juntao to get his ass here? (waitress has a baffled look) Thank you.
  • While Carter's waiting, he stops another waitress carrying food and sniffs it, but is repulsed and gives a "get that away from me" hand gesture.
• Carter trying to blend in with Juntao's gang:
  • "OK, you gonna kill me? Okay, put the gun down, fight me like a man. That's right, fight me like a man. Shit! Anybody can shoot somebody. That's what I'm talking about. Back, back. Give me some room. You don't know who you messing with. I'm gonna knock that yellow— (a foot comes from out of frame and smacks Carter in the face) ...Which one of y'all kicked me?"
  • Also him trying to pass as Juntao's cousin and explaining that he's "blackinese" and the goons aren't fooled one bit (because Juntao is actually a white Brit).
• Thomas Griffin, whom the audience already know to be the villain behind Soo Yung's kidnapping, gives a helpful piece of advice to Consul Han and the FBI: Pay the money.
• Carter and Soo Yung calling out Juntao is both funny and awesome.
  Carter: Push the goddamn button!
  Soo Yung: Push the goddamn button!
  (Beat)
  Carter: You heard what she said.
• Lee does his very best to save a Priceless Ming Vase in the middle of a fight with two mooks... then gunfire shatters it moments after he's won.
  Lee: SHIT!
• Carter's unabashed flirting with Johnson. Particularly when he apologizes for spreading rumors that the two slept together on Christmas and later trying to initiate phone sex with her right after practically begging her to help rescue Soo Yung back.
• Carter's response to Juntao falling to his death and crashing into a nearby water fountain.
  Carter: Woooooo! You know he dead!
• After Carter saves Lee from a falling death, causing Lee to slide onto him:
  Lee: Thank you, thank you! (kisses Carter on the cheek)
  Carter: (pushes Lee off him) Man, what the hell are you doing?!
  Lee: I was just being... polite.
  Carter: Well next time, be polite to my nuts!
• Carter is stoked about going to Hong Kong for two weeks, until Lee informs him that the flight is fifteen hours (Truth in Television, by the way: they're going from LAX to Hong Kong International Airport, which the average flight time is about fifteen hours). Carter really loses it when Lee starts singing "War" while listening to his headphones.
  Carter: Aw hell no! Stewardess! Stewardess, get me another seat!
  Lee: (singing) Listen to me, y'aaaaaaaalll!