Funny / Phelous 2020 Episodes

Beauty and the Beast (The Insane Elephant One)

• The Same Language Dub of the movie in Russian leading to Phelan doing the same to his review of Resident Evil (2002).

Ghostbusters (Goodtimes)

In this April Fools Day video, Phelous "reviews" a non-existent "lost" version of The Real Ghostbusters made by Goodtimes Entertainment that he (didn't) found. Except it's not even about that, since the video deteriorates into ridiculously nonsensical Blatant Lies later in the video. Highlights include:

• The theme song for the cartoon is a ridiculously slow and soft version of the Ghostbusters theme with the lyrics "Happy old Ghostbusters, bustin' all the old ghosts..."
• Phelous: "Ghostbusters is a rather intriguing property as it's both there, and not there at the same time."
• In addition, the cartoon was produced by Old Man and Bill Gates!
• The cartoon was also influenced by the movie Spook Chasers, a Ghostbusters knockoff toyline that Phelous himself previously covered in Bootleg Zones. Even better is why the toyline supposedly ended:
  Phelous: Spook Chasers had a toyline, but upon further research, it was racist, so it was canceled fortunately.
• In addition to Goodtimes Entertainment and Bill Gates, Dingo Pictures was involved!
  • And Wabuu even replaces Slimer in this cartoon!
  Wabuu: My ghost is sooooooo stupid!
• The fact that Shredder apparently made an appearance in the cartoon, and was stolen from ''Batman''.
  • Actually, he was apparently named after the classic pizza topping, "shredder".
    • Phelous then goes on to say that there's no actual proof of Shredder ever being in this series to begin with, due to every piece of footage apparently being destroyed.
    Phelous: But I'm reporting it as fact anyway, because I suck.
• Walt Disney, despite dying in 1966 and the original Ghostbusters film initially coming out in 1984, was involved with a Gorilla that appeared in the show, and it was "tougher than he'd imagined it". It's also believed to have inspired the character of Goofy!
• To make the episode convincing despite the above mentioned Blatant Lies already making it an obvious April Fools video, Phelous even got Harry Partridge to make a short animation for it, complete with references to his other Goodtimes reviews, with Janine resembling Beauty's Dull Surprise stare, and Peter Venkman resembling Prince Charming.

Rumpelstiltskin (Britannica)

• The intro to Rumpelstiltskin itself:
  Pat Morita: In Germany, people tell the story of a strange little man who thought that as long as nobody knew his secret, he could cause all kinds of trouble.
  (The camera zooms into the globe and shows the title card of...Smallville)
  Phelous (as Pat): This is the story of Smallville and the super-gaslighter Clark Kent, who could have saved himself a nemesis if he was just honest. (beat) ...It's true, isn't it?
• Phelous pointing out that the King is an untrustworthy prick who wants the girl to make gold for him, or be locked up for life. And that when Rumpelstiltskin came to collect her child, she should have said "Hell yes! Can you take us both out of here."

Bunny the Rabbit (Dingo Pictures)

• The Running Gag about the Bunny Police, represented by Judy Hopps.
• The Call-Back to the review of "Nice Cats" on how Mrs. Mcdonald and her cats left to elude the Bunny Regime.

Resident Evil 3 (Re-Make)

The Secret of Mulan

• UAV Entertainment’s bizarre decision to make Mulan and the other characters insects earns a lot of snark from Phelous.
  Phelous: But Disney famously screwed it [Mulan] up because... they didn't make it about bugs.
• “And finally, we have Lisa De Simone reprising her role as ‘Voice’ from The Secret of Anastasia”
• Singing along to Mala Khan’s awful Villain Song:
  Phelous: ♪ Mala Khan, da da da daa! ♪
  ♪ Shabing, ba ba wuuh! ♪
  ♪ Mala Khan, what am I saying? ♪
  ♪ Mala Khan, Mala Khan, me me me meeh! ♪
• Immediately after that:
  Woody Allen Bug: ♪ He gets to rule the world! ♪
  ♪ But I get to take whatever's leeeeeeeft! ♪
  Phelous: ♪ And all that’s left is a really shitty freeze-fraaaaame! ♪

Mortal Kombat: Scorpion’s Revenge

Dalmatians 2 (Dingo Pictures)

• The video begins with Phelous introducing us to Dalmatians’s Sequel Number Snarl:
  Phelous: Dingo Pictures only made two Dalmatian movies, but you can find these movies labeled as not only Dalmatians 3 on Playstation 2, but Dalmatians 4 on the DS and Wii!
• Phelous making fun of how the horrible art makes some mushrooms that were growing beneath a tree look like popsicles.
• Whoever voiced the crow narrator was… very bad at animal noises.
  Narrator Crow: Haah! Haah!^note ”Haah!” is an attempt at an impression of a crow honking Isn’t that idyllic?
  Phelous: I did not find that idyllic at all. It was actually quite annoying you stupid crow!
  Narrator Crow: ZZST!
  Phelous: It's that classic crow noise, ZZST!
• Playing back a scene of Krummel saying “Stupid” in slow motion.
• The Dingo writers (or at least the dubbers) apparently don’t know what “inquisitive” means.
  Narrator Crow: Haah! I almost felt sorry for Krumel, but as I'm very inquisitive, I didn't worry about him.
  Phelous!Crow: Apparently I think being inquisitive means being an uncaring ass! HAAH! ZZST!
• “Am I a robot? ZZST!”
• “Dear Dingo Pictures, we did NOT need pedo dogs!”
• Phelous repeatedly calling the crow narrator out on being a character in the story, but never interfering, despite the suffering that goes on around him.
  Phelous: Stupid Starfleet Crow and his Prime Directive!
• Mocking the fence’s bizarre graffiti, which consists of a lone “No” and “We like chicken”
  Phelous: Tupfelchen and Krumel go looking for the kidnapped dogs by the good ol ' "No" fence. And we also learn that some people like chicken. Though there's not a cock in sight on this graffiti, so that's not very realistic.
• When Krummel needs to stop to pee, the movie for some reason decides to use the term “piddling”.
  Phelous (snickering):Pfft, Piddly diddly doo!
• Phelous’s reaction to the introduction of the Backstreet Dogs (the gang in the junkyard). Highlights include calling Freddy (a dog who for some reason wears a baseball cap and sunglasses) a “Poochy wannabee cool dog”, being annoyed by Tramp (a blatant copy of the Disney character of the same name), and complaining about how Vera is drawn in a different art style from the rest of the movie.
  • His reaction to Bloom is especially funny:
  Bloom: Will [sic] your permission, Bloom the bookkeeper.
  Phelous: Any good dog gang has a bookkeeper. Gotta keep up with those biscuits, debits and credits.
• And, of course, “And I’m Butcher. That means butcher”
• When the crow narrator delivers a line that’s completely unintelligible:
  Phelous: Probably the smartest thing you’ve said yet.
• Talking about the movie’s Padding: “Dingo dares to be pointless.”
• Phelous editing in a scene of the annoying crow being Duck Hunt-ed.
• “That's uh, seriously all the crow adds during this cutaway, by the way. Just wanted to highlight that wonderful bit of storytelling.”
  • Does that mean it was a SCENE INTERRUPTING CROW?
• Phelous’s growing frustration at how the Backstreet Dogs’ “search” consists of just dicking around and chasing Charlie the cat up a tree.
• When the gang dogs get sidetracked from their search (for about the eleventh time) to bark at Charlie that cat, only for some reason the bark SFX doesn’t play.
  Wabuu: I love when you can put a dog’s bark on mute! Stupid barkers!
• For some bizarre reason, the Aldi logo can be seen on a bag of sausages.
  Phelous: I’m sure Aldi loved the brand placement.
• When Butcher walks into a sofa (accompanied by Dingo’s trademark “DUNNN! Of death”)
  Phelous: Well, to be fair, that sofa came out of nowhere.
• Calling out a bit of misused mathematical terminology.
  Crow (observing Pollux putting in the code to disable the factory’s alarm): 23574. And that's supposed to be a secret number. It's just a simple mathematical equation.
  Phelous: How is that an equation, you stupid crow?
• “Oh, good, just like in Animal Soccer World, Krumel's been turned into ‘Krummer’ again.”
• When the crow narrator defeats Castor and Pollux by putting in the code to activate their own traps on them:
  Phelous: So, THE NARRATOR saved the day… I don't know if this is the best or worst use of a Dingo narrator.
• This exchange:
  Vera: Rubbish!
  Phelous: It sure was. Rubbish: The Movie!
• Recapping the movie at the end of the review: “This was another Dingo classic where they strayed from copying another story that closely, so it just devolved into dinking around forever.”
  • To sum up Dingo Dalmatians 2, I can say only this: “Haah! ZZST!”

Dalmatians 3 (Dingo Pictures)

• Commenting on the odd sequel numbering in Dingo Pictures’s Dalmatians series:
  Phelous: Let's finish up the Dingo Dalmatians quadrilogy of two movies with the second movie, Dalmatians 3! Also known as Dalmatians 1. And Dalmatians 4.
• This movie has a particular bit of Special Effects Failure that the original Dalmatians lacked: Whenever a Fade Out or a Fade In occurs, the opacity of the characters and the backgrounds is lowered independently, with the end result being that characters always look like ghosts for a few seconds whenever a scene begins or ends. Phelous is shocked that somehow Dingo Pictures’ animation somehow managed to get worse.
• Being baffled when the opening uses an instrumental version of Wabuu’s theme song, when the raccoon doesn’t appear at any point in the film.
• The movie starts out by almost completely recycling the opening of Dalmatians 2, something Phelous snarks about.
  • They also reuse the animation models of Tupfulchen and Krummel to represent their puppies, which earns a clip of Krummel in Dalmatians 2 saying “I think that’s very stupid”.
• When a shot of Charlie the cat is accompanied by a bizarre white quarter-circle floating near the bottom of the screen:
  Phelous: And Charlie is still being haunted by that piece of white cat butt all these years later.
• The next scene involves Charlie carrying what looks like a VHS case of the first Dingo Dalmatians movie, only it’s titled “Dogg 1” (Yes, “Dogg” with two “g”s). Phelous speculates that this could be the fabled first movie in the “Dalmatians trilogy”.
• Being baffled when the “VHS Case” actually turns out to hold a “doggy cake” (which looks an awful lot like a bunch of dog biscuits).
  • The biscuits being called a “cake” earns a clip from the Pokémon dub where Brock calls onigiri “jelly donuts”.
• The transparent fade-ins lead to him making a joke about the characters being haunted by “the ghost of Annoying Narrator Crow past”.
  Phelous: Sadly, Dalmatians 3 actually has some of the best Dingo voice continuity, and I really never wanted to hear that annoying crow again.
  Phelous: Ghost crow this time doesn't constantly go HAAH! or ZZST. So I take back what I said. This is horrid continuity.
• Commenting on Dingo’s tendency to reuse character names:
  Phelous: If this is the same Charlie, does he ever wonder why he keeps running in to Lucys? Oh, good grief.
• “So if you want slow shots of dogs walking into town while Narrator Crow follows and nothing happens, Dingo has got you covered!”
• Due to Dingo’s recycled animation, said town is inhabited by “Anastasia, Manastasia, the old man who adopted her, and the ugly brat from Balto/Peter and the Wolf”
  • “And there's more of the Janis family going to dog food land! Quick, stick them in an Aldi bag!”
• When Charlie randomly produces a laptop computer and invites Lucy to go online with him:
  Phelous: Well, there is a new area of weird we haven't explored in Dingo Pictures yet!
• And when Charlie somehow immediately finds out what happened to the arrested puppies…
  Phelous: I miss year 2000 Internet, where we got immediate results on dog arrests with super generic searches.
  Charlie must have been using AltaVista! Remember AltaVista?
  No? Google it.
• “It's like it's a challenge for Dingo to find new ways to mess up!”
• “Oh no! Honey, we shrunk the Butcher!”
• His exasperation at the eight minute flashback to Dalmatians 2.
• Said flashback actually redubs the lines instead of reusing the old audio track, which Phelous is impressed by… at least, until he realizes they somehow managed to add a whole new bunch of line screw-ups that weren’t there in the original.
• The crow’s “It’s just a simple mathematical equation” line got changed to “It’s just a… ssssimple mathematics” in the redub.
  Phelous: That makes more sense
• Butcher (well, “Butch”) saying “YEE”
• When Charlie is climbing up a metal pipe
  Wabuu: ♪ Spider Charlie, Spider Charlie, does whatever, I don’t care! ♪
• When it’s revealed that there are secret passages underneath the dog pound
  Phelous: Many years later, Dingo Pictures will make a movie to explain WHY their secret passage is under the dog pound. Which will somehow be the best movie in the new Dingo Expanded Universe!
• As Charlie the cat digs through a trash can…
  Phelous: Oh, you’d better watch out, Charlie, sometimes those bins have eyes.
  //Cut to a clip of the Animate Inanimate Object trash bins in The Toys Room//
• “Sunglasses need a blink animation! We’re weirdos!”
• When Bloom says “That’s done”, Phelous edits him into an Argument of Contradictions with a clip of King Mah God saying “That’s not done”.
• In the secret passage:
  Lucy: Oh my, it’s really spooky in here!
  Phelous: If by that you mean it’s poorly drawn in here, I agree.
• Popping up a still frame of Wabuu when his theme plays again during the movie’s attempt at a “dramatic chase sequence”.

Dragon Ball Z: The Tree of Might’s 5 English Dubs

The Bye Bye Man

The Bye Bye Man

• The introduction, which has Phelous dressed as Mankind, mimicking the characters' panic in the movie.
  Phelous: Don't think it! Don't say it! Don't think it! Don't say it! Don't tell the story to a friend! Don't let that friend put the story into his book! Don't let the story in the book get adapted into a film! (holds up the DVD) Bye! Bye!
• "Let's look at the serious tale of Mr. Toilet Man."
• The Running Gag picture of the Bye Bye Man holding For Dummies guide books.
• When the three main characters are looking over the house, Phelous splices in scenes from Ghostbusters. In particular, when they find an obscene shower curtain that John is way too impressed over.
  Ray Stantz: Wow, this place is great!
• There's a scene in which the titular antagonist stalks Elliot in the library. However, he disappears when the librarian scares Elliot leaving Phelous to speculate that "librarian jumpscares are just too scary for Bye Bye Man".
• At a crime scene, The Bye Bye Man appears only to Elliot, but is positioned as if he's talking to police officers.
  Phelous!Bye Bye Man: Can you guys believe that stupid Elliot, I keep getting him with my great pranks.
• When Phelous points out the flaw in The Bye Bye Man's modus operandi of driving people to kill themselves despite needing them alive to spread his name around.
  "Bye Bye Man, you idiot!"

---