Funny / Marvel One-Shots

The Consultant

• The explanation for why Tony talked to General Ross instead of Nick Fury or Agent Coulson; the World Security Council wanted the Abomination for the Avengers Initiative, and demanded that SHIELD send an agent to get him from Ross. Coulson and Sitwell were well aware that was quite possibly the worst idea ever, so they sent Stark in to sabotage the meeting.
• Then the end.
  Coulson: It worked. He had General Ross so mad he tried to have him removed from the bar.
  Sitwell: How'd that go?
  Coulson: Stark bought the place. It's scheduled for demolition on Tuesday.

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Thor's Hammer

• The title, for starters.
• Coulson casually purchasing donuts at a gas station after saving the cashier from two rifle-toting robbers.
  Cashier: Wait! What do I tell the police?
  Beat
  Coulson: Tell them the Tae Bo tapes really paid off.
• (casually) "Excuse me, but I also have this gun." Oh, Coulson, you're such a Troll.

Item 47

• The Snark-to-Snark Combat between Sitwell and Blake over the mission.
• Blake's look of surprise when Sitwell has Benny and Claire join SHIELD. With Claire as his assistant.
• Blake asks if she can make coffee, only for her to say no.
• The Stinger where Claire spins around in her chair in her office at SHIELD; bored.
• Sitwell fighting Benny and Claire, then the gun goes off... and destroys all the stolen money.

Agent Carter

• After handcuffing a thug, Peggy deliberately attracts the other guards by ordering him to scream for help. He does so... even after all the other guards are knocked out. Then, after coming back after knocking out the guard he didn't tell her about...
  Peggy: (looks at the bound guard sternly) Learn to count.
• The Stinger, where Dum-Dum Dugan beholds a recent invention: the bikini. Which is much larger than its modern incarnation.

All Hail The King

• The fact that several hardened prisoners have become Trevor Slattery's fan club.
• It's hilarious to see Jackson Norris, a serious reporter/Ten Rings agent, doing all he can to keep a straight face listening to Trevor and failing.
• Trevor's dirty little secret:
  Jackson Norris: Trevor, you told me that when you got this role that you'd researched it thoroughly.
  Trevor Slattery: Yeah, but when an actor tells you he's "done the research" it means he's switched on his computer, googled his own name and had a quick wank!
• Jackson Norriss reveals that the Mandarin is real and he's pissed off at Trevor for stealing his name.
  Jackson Norriss: There's someone who wants to meet you.
  Trevor: Do I know him?
  Jackson Norriss: No, but you took his name, and now he wants it back.
  Trevor: (Beat) Sorry, still don't get it.
• Justin Hammer's cameo in The Stinger.
  Justin Hammer: Who does [Trevor] think he is? I led an army of robots. What's he got, a funny accent? Looks like the lovechild of Bin Laden and Benny Hill.