Funny / Jon Lajoie

• From "Brent Horst: Politician"
  Brent Horst: *when asked about Economic Prosperity* I'm not sure what that...means, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with trains
  Brent Horst: *asked about Education* If elected, I will make reading books very important. Kids should read books, instead of shooting guns at each other.
  Brent Horst: I am very much against murder. If elected, I will make it illegal to murder someone
• From "Everyday Normal Guy"
  Everyday Normal Guy: When I go to the clubs, I wait in line, motherfucker
  Everyday Normal Guy: Last time I had sex was in 2003, and I'm ashamed to admit it, but it wasn't free
  Everyday Normal Guy: I get constipated once a month, motherfucker
  Everyday Normal Guy: I make pretty good spaghetti sauce, motherfucker
  Everyday Normal Guy: When I get into a fight I usually leave on a stretcher
  Everyday Normal Guy: I have an According to Jim personality, I'm as entertaining as a fucking STD
  Everyday Normal Guy: I don't have many friends who would back me up, my friend Steve would, but he doesn't look very tough
  Steve: You want some of this, bitch?
• From "WTF Collective 3"
  MC Vagina: You can't spell chorus without... vagina.
  MC Final Verse: Um, yes you can.
  MC Vagina: That's racist.
• Everything MC Doesn't Know What Irony Is says.
• "Merry Christmas Exclamation Point," the perfect Christmas song circa-2013.
• In "WTF Collective 2," MC Knows Too Many Facts About Bees claims that knowing a lot about bees doesn't mean that he's gay. He's also MC In the Closet Homosexual.