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Who's a good raptor?note 

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    Universal 
  • Some of the gear.
    • There's 2 (3 with Requiem Pack) explosive rubber ducks. They aren't considered suspicious, and thus are likely the best available explosives.
    • Similarly, the reward for Mastering "The Icon" gives an explosive The Icon action figure. Doesn't help that Rocco, the half-naked chef in Sapienza, will say "Wrong address. Unless that's my Icon figurine" if you ring his doorbell while dressed as a delivery man.
    • "Mixtape 47". Judging from its title, you'd think that it would play some sort of classical music. It actually plays foreign Pop songs.
    • Mastering Professional difficulty in Paris gives access to an explosive Napoleon Bonaparte doll called Napoleon Blownaparte.
    • On the disguise end of things, if you obtained the Santa Claus disguise from the Christmas Bonus Mission and use that during the normal levels, people will acknowledge you in various ways ranging from wishing you a Merry Christmas to expressing skepticism at Santa's existence. And yes, the film star in Bangkok still says "Ooh, there goes my next ex-husband" even if 47 is wearing the outfit. She certainly has an interesting taste in men. Likewise, Jason Portman still berates 47 for stealing his idea.
    • The GOTY version includes Blood Money's clown outfit from the mission "A New Life", as well as a baseball bat (named "A New Bat", after the level itself) that has "unique sound and visual effects" to go along with it.
    • Trying to go into restricted areas has guards say some amusing lines:
    “No, no, no. I'll never let you through here. I would shoot myself first.”
    “Sorry, the parade is next month, can't let you through right now.”
    “You really think that was going to let you through here? Move along now.”
    • The Corky Commotion escalation starts with a shot of a guard smoking, and 47 rises from just offscreen, below in the goofy clown outfit.
  • Another new outfit is called "Cowboy suit", which, while not as absurd as the clown outfit, is a stereotypical southern suit with a large belt buckle. Of note is that his idle animation has him doing a western-style duelling pose.
  • Drowning every single one of your targets in their own toilets.
    • The fact that you can just follow them into the bathroom as their guard stands outside not questioning this at all (though only if you already have access to the bathroom and the room it adjoins).
  • If you subdue someone but choose not to knock out or kill the victim for some time, the victim will point out the awkwardness of the situation. Some will comment on his choice of clothes, ask if he's seen any movies, or ask how long he is going to take because they have an appointment to make.
    • “Is… is this the first time you're doing this? Cuz… ah… it doesn't seem it's working.”
    • Male victims will often attempt to humorously insult Agent 47, like saying, “My girlfriend hugs me harder than this” or “You must play too many video games.”
    • Some male guards may even comment on how Agent 47 seemed a lot stronger in Blood Money.
    • Is that a gun in your pocket? I hope it's a gun.”
    • What makes most of these even funnier is how the music intensifies as you continue to choke the victim… before it slowly fades away, in time for the victim to speak their tension-breaking dialogue.
  • If you incapacitate/kill a target without their bodyguard(s) noticing the act, the bodyguard(s) will say some rather hilarious lines as they wander around the map.
    Bodyguard: Oh... Did I lose the package? Where's the goddamn V.I.P!? Hello?! You can come out now!
  • If you approach a bodyguard while wearing the Requiem Suit:
    Bodyguard: Is that...Pitbull?
  • Standing VERY close to people for a few seconds while within their field of view would cause them to react as expected.
    Male NPCs: Ok...this is awkward.
    Female NPCs: Uh sir, could you please go away? You're...kinda in my personal space.
    • Also, others would react to you crouching or hiding in plain sight, with most people asking why you're hiding and a few others making snarky remarks. Staying that way long enough would cause them to react with annoyance.
    Male NPCs: Do I need to make a call to your psychologist? Because you need help.
    Female NPCs: Um...sir? Are you alright? Do you need medication?
  • If you get in a shootout with security guards, get hit repetitively and prolong the shooting, there is a chance that the guards will comment about 47's apparent invincibility.
    Security guard: Why is this not over?! How many bullets we have been firing into this guy?!
  • Getting into a fistfight with a guard will will sometimes cause another guard to yell "Yeah get him Steve!" and if 47 wins the fight they say "Uh, next time Steve."

    Tutorial 

  • During the Tutorial, you are railroaded into killing one of the ICA employees playing one of their targets for real by sending him up in a rigged ejector seatnote . This results in his screaming demise but the funny part comes from the fact that everyone in the simulation breaks character to call out 47 for this. It also gets 47 a passing grade.
    • And in a morbidly amusing way, 47 does this by disguising himself as part of the flight crew and details to the soon-to-be-ejected step-by-step instructions that he thinks are part of a safety check. All while speaking in a peppy, cheerful tone.
    • All There in the Manual materials heavily imply that the ejector seat opportunity is canonically not only what 47 did to pass the final test, but also what Soders did to the real Jasper Knight way back.
  • The other special way of killing the target is to sabotage the projector by turning the fusebox with a plainly visible wire leading to the projector off and then back on. If you turn the fusebox off while the target and KGB officer are in the room together, the target will start fiddling with the projector, then the officer will walk over and turn on the fusebox in what ends up looking like a very deliberate decision to kill the target himself.
  • If you assault any of the actors while in view of other NPCs, they'll break character and comment on how that must've been painful, etc.
  • One of two guards in the beginning of the Final Test will comment on how he wants to put more security on the roof. The other guard will ask him, "Why? Expecting someone?", thus confirming that the actors knew that the ICA test was rigged. The guard was reminding the first guy that he had no reason (in-character) to suspect that someone might be coming from the roof.
  • During the montage showing 47's career, there's a shot of a table with the tools of the trade. Things like the garrote, guns, passports, a rubber duck, a switchblade…
  • In the warmup training mission, you are instructed to knock out the yacht's chef by throwing a wrench at him to get his uniform. After completing the mission, you have to run the scenario again and are allowed to explore different methods of elimination. The chef you knocked out? He now has a heavily bandaged head.

    Paris 

The Showstopper

  • You can walk in between the news reporter at the start of the level and the recording cameraman to get this frustrated response. Doing this multiple times will get them to go away:
    Reporter: Ugh, cut!
    Cameraman: Yeah, thanks a lot man. Real considerate.
  • If you sabotage the Auction laptop, Dalia goes to try and sort it out while her aide runs off fearing reprisals. Dalia huffs that she, “knows computers,” which judging by the frustrated mumbles that follows is a clear lie. Made even funnier by Dalia being voiced by Mary Elizabeth McGlynn, who is known for voicing a certain character considered godlike in her hacking ability.
  • Once disguised as Helmut Kruger, Agent 47 has to complete a model runway walk before heading up the stairs. 47 looks absolutely fabulous doing so.
    • While in-character as Kruger, 47 will almost gleefully praise Dalia's choice of cyanide as a last resort.
  • Blowing up Viktor with a blogger's camera is hilarious as he literally is blasted into a nearby fountain by the explosion. Doubly funny because he's only doing the online interview as a snub to the more mainstream reporters.
  • Also, possibly Gameplay and Story Segregation, that all of the guards are racist/stupid enough to mistake the tri-racial (Hispanic, Chinese, and Caucasian) 47 for a Middle Eastern prince.
  • One option for eliminating your targets during the Paris level is to push Dalia over the balcony so that she lands on Viktor, killing them both. It's even a Challenge.
  • Killing your targets dressed as "The Vampire Magician" which is considered Trespassing in the entire Paris level (except the fashion show—for obvious reasons). Doubles as 47 being awesome.
  • Equipping certain outfits on the Paris map will illicit various snide responses from the security guards that guard routes to restricted areas:
    • Dressing up as the Vampire Magician will have guards making vampire trope cracks and naming you "Dracula."
    • Dressing up in the Tuxedo will have guards calling you James Bond and making references to the films.
  • One of the ways to remove the security guard blocking access to the saber is to use the vacuum cleaner in the adjacent utility room to lure him in. If allowed to turn off the vacuum, the canned response can be interesting.
    Guard: (in a robotic monotone) Conserve energy.
  • The lighting rig kill, where you cause the massive lighting rig to collapse right on top of Viktor. According to Hitman 3, this is actually the canonical way 47 eliminates him.
  • You overhear a reporter of some sort force her reluctant underling to infiltrate the auction and get some dirt on Dalia. You follow the poor woman into the bathroom and then beat the shit out of her in order to swipe her invite for yourself. For exploration's sake, you decide to pop into the next room over. It's another bathroom, and sitting next to the sink is another auction invite, free for you to take. Oops.
  • If you initiate the lockdown protocol via Novikov's bodyguard's phone, you can listen in on Dalia and Victor having a snark-filled conversation.
    Dalia: Well, this is cozy.
    Victor: Save it, Dalia. It's simple procedure. We'll be out of here as soon as the threat is neutralized.
    Victor: *sigh*
  • If you happen to overhear Sebastian Sato in the dressing room savagely criticizing the outfits he felt coerced into designing for Novikov, his speech on the stage becomes one of these because it's clear his entire speech is one big Double Meaning spiel about how much he hates Novikov, who is standing right next to him, and it goes clear over Novikov's head.
  • The auctioneer on the top floor has randomised voice clips for all the things IAGO is selling, which by itself is funny enough. It also means a specific item of interest ("A conflict in the middle eastern part of"...) is paired up with a totally random country (..."Ukraine"); which as the example displays, they're auctioning off "goods" that are impossible to happen due to where they're apparently situated.

Holiday Hoarders

  • The entire premise of Holiday Hoarders. Somehow the ICA has heard about two thieves named Harry and Marv planning to steal some Christmas presents. The solution? Send Agent 47 to eliminate them. The mission also marks the return of the legendary Santa suit.
  • Completing all 5 challenges in the holiday mission unlocks the Santa suit for every level. If 47 manages to assassinate someone while wearing the outfit, he says, “Ho, ho, ho,” in an extremely dry manner.
  • There's a special escape in "Holiday Hoarders". If you're wearing the Santa suit, you can escape via chimney.

    Sapienza 

World Of Tomorrow

  • The various ways to murder Silvio Caruso tend to be a lot more funny than Francesca De Santis. These include blowing him up with an explosive golf ball, blowing him up with an antique cannon, blowing up his seaplane with an antique cannon, detonating the exploding rubber duck while it's in his plane as he's escaping, and killing him as the Medieval Plague Doctor with a circumcision or amputation knife.
  • If you destroy Silvio's body in a woodchipper after delivering flowers to his mother's grave after he asks to be alone, his bodyguards will be confused as all get out what happened to their VIP and wonder if they're going to get fired.
  • For those who like Black Humor, stalking your targets through the mansion as a Medieval Plague Doctor. It transforms Hitman into a slasher movie where you can and do jump out at targets left and right.
    • Trying to enter through the front gate of the mansion while dressed as the Plague Doctor can net you this response.
    Guard: Looks like someones been playing too much Assassin's Creed. This is not a cosplay event. Please step back, sir, you need to leave.
  • 47 dressing up as a hippie and putting a joint in Silvio or Francesca's cigarettes.
  • 47 can knock people out by throwing cans of Spaghetti at their heads with Bullseye levels of accuracy.
    • In missions where they appear, 47 can also do this with soda cans.
  • This NPC's hilarious phone calls.
  • Silvio's family tape music starts off as an old fashioned love song but gets darker.
    Singer: I watched that swine drink to his fill.
    Get rid of him or I swear I will,
    Ritorna a me! I'm begging you! Come back to me!
    Ritorna a me! I'm seeking you, thinking of… 47 ways to make you pay!
    • The fact that the very first line is "I put 47 spices in the pasta but it still tastes like ashes in my mouth..." would guarantee a chuckle from every player despite its being an emotional moment for Silvio.
  • At the end of this elusive target, one player is astonished that he failed to get Silent Assassin, despite not being spotted and having no bodies found. He only learns what happens in the comments: 47's car ran over a pedestrian during the ending cutscene.
  • If you poison a particular female scientist in the secret Ether laboratory, she might commit unintentional suicide by walking into the biohazard area of the lab and suffocating to death rather than going outside of the lab and puking. She actually passes a door that leads outside.
  • You can let yourself into Rocco's apartment and steal his keycard and kitchen uniform right before he gets changed to go into work. That, or push him off the balcony right after his sister demands he gets down there at once.
  • While blending in as a corpse in one of the church morgue's caskets (or starting at the church morgue), the priest will sometimes stop by it and pray. Getting up from it while he's praying will scare the priest into fainting; from his point of view, a corpse he was praying for just got up on its own.
  • One of the scientists is setting himself up to be fired. How? By stealing one of Caruso's vintage wine bottles and drinking it near the garage. And despite the wine storage being close to the garage, none of the housekeepers are able to catch him.
  • While searching through his files, Francesca will find a drawing of Silvio as a superhero, with the rather ridiculous titles "The Host", "Contagion", and "Virulent Man". Despite her normally serious attitude, this elicits a chuckle from her.

Landslide

  • You can encounter one of Abiatti's bodyguards psyching himself up in a mirror.
    Bodyguard: You are strong, you are sooo sexy. You are the man! And let no one tell you otherwise!
  • Exposing Abiatti for the bastard he is by sabotaging the stage and turning on a mic as he berates a stage crew member.
    Stagehand: Marco, wait. We have a problem. I don't know, some kind of technical glitch…
    Abiatti: You listen here, you little twerp! I need these pathetic people's votes! So you get your act together or I will crush you!
    (the crowd turns to him and boos)
    Stagehand: Marco, I think I left the mic on.
    Abiatti: The mic on? Oh. Hey, I was only joking. It was just a joke! Something the opponent would say!
    (crowd continues booing)
    Stagehand: Yeah, right.
    • Electrocuting Abiatti when he tries to explain himself to the crowd.
  • Abiatti can also be electrocuted by sabotaging an extension cord near a grave he proceeds to piss on.
  • When Abiatti takes a glass of wine from a vendor, he'll complain that the wine is "too fermented" for his taste. The waiters decide to continue serving him from the same glass out of spite because they think he won't taste the difference. Indeed, he never does notice.
  • A man in the bathroom area in the town can occasionally be heard grumbling about his smartphone addiction, which has led him to do things like post his half-eaten sandwich on Instagram.

The Author

  • If you attend the photoshoot disguised as the "superfan", the target asks if 47 has any questions before they start. 47 actually does, and it's about the book, without a hint of irony. So either 47 prepares for every possible scenario and read the books just in case they come up, or he read them for some other reason. He actually calls the writer out for some poor writing he noticed, implying the latter.

Elusive Targets

  • The entire premise of the Gary Busey elusive target, for starters. Busey ran off the set of a commercial for a male hygiene product and now 47 has been hired to assassinate him. Evidently, he ran off screaming, “You'll never find me! I have the power of invisibility!”
    • And immediately after this, the mission briefing displays a section of "Additional claims by Gary Busey"
    Teleportation (Debunked)
    Fire Breath (Debunked)
    Mind Control (Debunked)
    Invincible Robot Man (Undetermined)
    • The following is Gary Cole's (comparatively more believable) dossier, much of which is actually atrocities he claimed to commit during the promotional campaign to vote who between him and Busey was the Worst Gary that the community wanted to kill for the mission:
    Biting and sarcastic
    Clips nails on public transportation
    Bludgeoned baby seal with another baby seal
    • Busey's antics have racked up more than 840 (and counting) emergency calls… and one Bigfoot sighting.

    Marrakesh 

A Gilded Cage

  • The mission briefing shows a news ticker calling back to the Paris and Sapienza missions. This includes noting that the grisly murders at the fashion show somehow caused Sanguine as a brand to become more popular, something that prompted Sebastian Sato to quit.
  • 47 can disguise himself as a masseur to get to Strandberg. During the massage, 47 can break Strandberg's neck. The kicker? The challenge awarded for this is called "(Un)Happy ending"
    • The masseur himself can be found in the conference room, pleading for his stubborn boss to get him out of massaging a criminal.
    Konny Engstrom: Well that's easy for you to say. You're not the one whose supposed to be doing deep tissue massage in a freaking war zone.
  • You can kill Strandberg by dropping a moose statue on him during the interview. The achievement for doing so? A Room With A Moose!
  • Two soldiers in the school are busy badmouthing Zaydan while they think he can't hear. The intercom controls are right behind them, which 47 can turn on. Cue them panicking when they notice the mic is on, ending with them hoping Zaydan didn't hear them. He did.
    • And when Zaydan shows up to chew them out, 47 can kick a toilet at his head. Target down.
  • If you follow Strandberg in the consulate long enough, he will receive a call from his daughter, whom according to the briefing he conned out of her deceased mother's inheritance. He thinks she has called out of concern… but then informs him she is part of the protesters and holding a sign that reads, “String him!”.
    Strandberg: Children. What a sham.
  • Dismiss all the soldiers in the abandoned school and a radio spawns near the intercom. Turn it on and…
  • There are probably better ways to free the prisoner than throwing a wrench at his head, then unceremoniously stuffing him in the closet. Probably…
  • The NPC dialogue in the consulate can get pretty ridiculous.
    • One guy is trying to put together an IKEA chair with nonsensical instructions and parts. He calls the person demonstrating the instructions "naked silhouette guy". He calls the company and the "wheel" is a "graphical representation of the user tightening a 5mm flathead screw in a counter-clockwise motion". He gets instructions and once he hangs up he say that it didn't make any sense. He gives up and angrily says that if anyone asks there were screws missing.
    • A woman who is scared for her life is trying to convince her friend that she isn't just trying to get out of her bridesmaid duties. She gets more and more frustrated that her friend is putting her wedding over her possibly dying in a riot. She eventually yells that she does hate her bridesmaid dress.
    • One NPC hiding upstairs, a parody of Julian Assange, rants to a guard about the exposure Strandberg (whose situation is also based on Assange) is getting compared to him.
    Alden: Unlimited information was supposed to make people smarter.
    Guard: You see, that's your problem, Alden. Most people, when left with a choice, will gravitate towards the dumbest thing available. We now have the accumulated wisdom of mankind at our fingertips. We also have a billion hours of "keyboard cat".
    Alden: I, uh... I don't know what that is.
    Guard: Of course you don't, Alden. Of course you don't.
  • Infiltrating the Swedish Consulate while in your starting suit makes it so that everyone besides the guards won't be suspicious of 47, since 47's default outfit for the level is a linen suit that fits in with the rest of the workers.. However, this can be done with any starting suit, including ones that stick out like a sore thumb, such as the clown outfit, and the level's fortune teller's outfit.
  • The fact that all the furniture in the Swedish consulate is out of the Ikea catalogue.

A House Built On Sand

  • At the end of a "Kill Everyone" challenge, a Youtuber is shocked to find out 47 killed 945 NPC's on the Summer Bonus map, not even expecting that amount on the map itself.
  • Having 47 disguise as the fortuneteller and blend into the shop while the real guy's previous customer is still there, the customer will continue their conversation with 47. The conversation is random but one stood out: The fortuneteller correctly predicted that the customer uses an alias, and he's asking the fortuneteller to make sure there's no one else in his life who knows his true identity, as he really doesn't want to have those people killed to maintain it. What really makes it funny is the nearly nonchalant way the customer talks about not wanting to resort to murder, as if it would be a minor inconvenience for him to have people killed. It also makes you wonder who the hell this guy is and what kind of secret life he's lived that's worth murdering people to keep under wraps.
  • Summer Bonus mission target, Kong Tuo-Kwang, is normally calm and collected, even when threatened at gunpoint. However, he doesn't react well to you throwing stuff around.
    Kong: What!? Who's throwing shit around!?
  • You can overhear a conversation between two friends, where one says that a fortune teller told him that a Frenchman would come and ask for a fortune teller, which actually happened, and the man believes that this is actually part of a grander plan where he is actually supposed to tell his friend, but it comes across that the grander plan was the he was supposed to tell 47, who is listening in, who can then use said fortune teller disguise to kill said Frenchman, making it seem like the fortune teller actually has powers. Of course, the man's friend is more interested in the first man's sister and barely pays any attention.
  • The option for executing the target when they come in for a fortune reading is "Kill Client". One wonders if 47 would spike anyone who sat across from him at that table.

Elusive Targets

  • Upon the death of Mr. Giggles, Diana has a Not So Above It All moment and goes for a one-liner.
    Diana: At the risk of seeming flippant, the clown has expired, and the money has been wired. Exit 47, stage left.

    Bangkok 

Club 27

  • 47 can kill Jordan Cross by suffocating him in his birthday cake.
  • If you complete the "Oops, I Did It Again," challenge Cross pushes Morgan out his suite window before immediately panicking and calling his father to say he "did it again," prompting Diana to make a quip. You can also take the opportunity to push Cross out the window as well, in the exact same way he killed his girlfriend.
    Diana: Target down. I see you're outsourcing, 47.
  • A piece of dialogue from the chef arguing with Dexy Barat about Jordan's cake topper.
    Chef: It's only numbers! I'm sure Jordan Cross doesn't need a cake to remind him how old he is!
    • He'll also complain about how it specifically has to be a vegan cake, and go on a grumpy little rant about the ever changing dietary restrictions millennials have.
      Chef: First it was "High carb, low fat." Then it was "High fat, low carb." And now sugar is just evil incarnate, isn't it?!
  • A piece of dialogue between Ken Morgan and his bodyguard:
    Morgan: Say, Otis, that ear piece of yours. Would you be able to tune in on the game?
    Otis: What game, sir?
    Morgan: "What game?" he says. England vs. Argentina. It's the WSF semi-finals, man! I had Sky box tickets and everything and now I'm halfway across the world watching the score online like a chump!
    Otis: Is that cricket, sir?
    Morgan: You're dead to me, Otis.
  • It's possible to kill both targets by dropping coconuts on them.
  • One NPC is busy telling his friend that because everybody loves him, he could easily become the next president.
  • 47 doing an epic drum solo while sporting his trademark stonefaced expression and Abel de Silva's colorful outfit.
  • If confronted by 47 at gunpoint, Ken Morgan will mention, among other things, that he's a "good guy" because he has a dog named "Pickles", in an attempt to beg 47 not to shoot him.
  • One challenge requires 47 to be dressed as an exterminator and have Jordan Cross' recording area evacuated so that he can inspect it. Normally, you'd use this opportunity to gas the entire room where Jordan and his friends are staying so that you'd knock them all out, or lead him to Morgan and watch them fight... or you could actually go up to the recording area, play La Cucaracha on the keyboard, and bear witness to the titular insect in all of its...colossal glory?
  • At the end of describing the On The House opportunity, Diana suggests that 47 escort Morgan up, quipping "I know how you love to grovel".
  • Morgan asking 47 to clean up a "calcium stain" in his suite's bathroom.

The Source

    Colorado 

Freedom Fighters

  • Whenever Ezra Berg is not in the shed, the two soldiers guarding it will have a chat through the window; topics vary, but they invariably involve the insane ramblings of the guard outside the shed and the guard inside telling him to get psychiatric help.
    • Similar to Bangkok, the guard standing outside will chat admiringly about a certain billionaire presidential candidate with a famous hairdo. And then, his partner becomes agitated and chews him out for suddenly talking about such an odd and random subject out of nowhere.
    • Alternatively, the conversation can be about the outdoor guard's quest to able to breathe underwater. The conversation doesn't go… swimmingly.
    • The two guards can talk about how the moon is a conspiracy. It's not real and what we're seeing is the other side of the sun. Somehow.
    • With barely any warning while the indoor guard is still walking to the window, the outdoor guard strikes up a conversation about where to shoot someone to "pacify" them.
      Outdoor Guard: I'd go for the soft parts of his thigh, or maybe try to graze him on the neck. A nice, uh, like, flesh wound. I think that would stop him.
      Indoor Guard: What are you rambling about? Is this your nonstop stream of consciousness?
  • Two guards in Colorado will remark about various incidents, based on videos uploaded to Youtube. For example: In one conversation, two guards discuss a rumor of how somebody killed over 70 people at a fashion show in Paris by luring them into an electrified puddle.
  • If you complete the training mission while Rose is observing, he will be impressed with the disguised 47's performance and, in a moment of irony, compliment him by noting that 47 would make a good assassin.
  • Rose's reaction to getting blown up by his watch. The implication that 47 purposefully wrote an email with nothing but the word "boom" in it is particularly funny, considering his usual professionalism.
    Rose: Email. Boom? What the—
  • The fact that you can instantly kill someone by dropping a bale of hay on them.
  • Activating any of the radios causes them to run some commercials.
    • One is for a wrestling match, featuring a wrestler named "The Hitman". The announcer is as hammy as one can possibly be.
    • One is for a movie in which a diseased dog goes on a journey to find his owner, and befriends a cat on the way. To take it one step further, one of the songs in "Mixtape 47" is apparently from this film.
  • One of the level exits has 47 scooting away on a child's scooter named Mr. Raptor after gathering a bunch of apricots and feeding them to a toy scooter inside the main house. The fact that he takes the time to rub and pat the toy's head is the icing on the cake. If that's not enough for you, there is a chance that 47 might say this in his usual deadpan tone when he rides it.
    47: Vroom, vroom, vroom. Ding, ding, ding.
  • Unlike most targets, Maya Parvati taunts 47 instead of begging for her life when confronted by him at gunpoint. Some of her taunts are especially humorous.
    Maya: What are you waiting for, you bitch!? C'mon, bitch tits!!

The Vector

  • Diana will be confused and impressed if you somehow manage to kill targets before she gives you intel on them:
    Diana: Wait... Okay, target kill confirmed. That wasn't the one I was providing you intel on though, 47.
    Diana: Skipping ahead are we? Target killed.
  • Diana will also be disapproving of any targets using their laptop for less scrupulous means.
    Diana: Someone on a laptop, 47. The Target is playing a game of "Legendary Battle Lords"... and not doing well.
    Diana: The Target is on a laptop, 47. Not sure why. Let me check his SQUID logs. Ah. I do hope... he has someone to clear his browser history.

Elusive Targets

  • The Bookkeeper's audits of the various Freedom Fighter's factions incites increasingly bizarre justifications on the expenditures during each subsequent observation. Some border on the bizarre.
    • The perimeter security guy tells Jarnefelt this gem of an anecdote:
      This is a mountain state, man. You have crazies out here like you wouldn't believe. We had an SUV turn up at the gate just yesterday. There was this couple inside, they asked us if we were taking new members. We've got ops for that, of course. Pretended we were a pro-choice, gay-marriage, prepper community, and they turned around and drove away. [laughs] Best cover story ever.

    Hokkaido 

Situs Inversus

  • One opportunity involves stealing a remote control to a doctor's emotion-regulating neural implant to create a distraction. It's funny enough turning the implant up and watching him burst with giddy euphoria, but press the switch again, and he'll fall into deep, very melodramatic depression. Follow him long enough in his depressed state and he'll find a quiet cliff to throw himself off. Then again, you can always flip the switch to turn "Happy Mode" back on, or off, or on, or off again… He actually has over five minutes of unique dialogue for every mood swing!
  • The yoga instructor broke his leg while trying to do a yoga pose his 12 year old brother challenged him to. He'll attempt to call his brother to try get him out of the situation, only for him to pass the phone to his mother instead.
  • Agent Smith is back! After 47 rescues him, he recognizes 47 immediately from their last "meeting". He sounds like he's actually gotten used to his constant Butt-Monkey status, and references how he's in debt to 47 for the previous rescues. Even if you don't knock out anyone in the room you free him in as he will chat with 47 next to the people who kidnapped him talking about other matters.
  • A piece of dialogue from a man leaving the sauna after you tampered with the temperature:
    Sauna Guy: Excuse me while I go and roll in the snow for a while!
  • Talking to Jason Portman in your default suit.
    Portman: Shut up, Helmu— wait, you're not Helmut. Hey, bad form, dude. You stole my idea. Hey, look, asshole, maybe you can find someone else to emulate? How about… I don't know, Jordan Cross? He's hot right? Wow, this is super embarrassing. At least we don't share the same social circles. Shut up, we don't, right? I've got connections! I can make you disappear for good!
  • The "Ghost In The Machine" Opportunity requires you to disguise yourself as the hospital director in order to gain access to KAI's control room. However, said director has black hair, making you wonder how the hell this is going to work… It's a wig.
  • If 47 disguises himself as the surgeon and kills Soders during the surgery, this exchange can occur between him and a nurse:
    Nurse: Doctor! That's terrible about Mr. Soders. What happened?
  • One of the toilets in the lobby bathroom has a button prompt for "Request Permission". If pressed, 47 looks down to it, and says the famous line…
  • Apparently 47 does Yoga, as he knows all the positions names when posing as an instructor.
    • Not to mention said opportunity involves 47 calling out positions that make Yamazaki edge progressively closer to the edge of a cliff, culminating in making her stand on one foot right at the edge of said cliff followed by a swift kick over the edge.
  • 47 crushing Erich Soders' replacement heart with a single bare hand then casually tossing it in a trash bin manages to be simultaneously hilarious, creepy, and utterly badass.
    • It is still possible, albeit unnecessary, to kill Erich Soders after destroying the replacement heart. There is a challenge that requires you to do this, while another requires you to do it in reverse. The latter challenge is even named "Overkill".
  • Dexter, a Texan patient at the hospital, engages in some aggressive verbal behavior on the various employees at GAMA.
    • Him going full Eagle Land on an employee who blocks his access to the kitchen:
    Dexter: If it wasn't for us you'll be speaking German "Ach Ja" and Japanese "Konechiwa".
    Employee: I do speak Japanese, and I am Japanese, but this area is staff only.
    • Another with a Security Guard:
    Security Guard: This leads to the Helipad, sir.
    Dexter: Helipad? That's awfully fancy for a hospital.
  • Starting the mission with the ninja outfit, complete with dramatic pan over ninja 47 looking over the GAMA facility perched on a snowy cliff. Given that this costume is actually part of a loadout unlike the other wacky 100% suspicion costumes (Vampire Magician, Plague Doctor, etc.) that have to be found in the actual stage, it makes you wonder if 47 is actually enough of a dork to indulge in his ninja cosplay fantasies on the job.
  • By killing the two guys dancing on the worker's quarters (one needs to die from the game), 47 can use the game himself, with the button prompt even assuring you are "Alone. No one can watch". 47 can't keep up with the game and just awkwardly moves around the controller carpet.
    • Wearing the ninja disguise while dancing, however, results in 47 getting over 20 million points and taking the first spot on the leaderboard as "Barcodeman_47".
  • There's something deeply hilarious about disguised 47 telling Yamazaki that they have inside info about an possible assassination attempt. When she points out that surely the hospital checks patient's backgrounds, 47 explains to her how easy it is to get a fake identity.
    • 47's dry sense of humor really shows near the end of the conversation, when Yamazaki turned her back on him and leaned on the nearby railing (providing the perfect opportunity to eliminate her by pushing her over it).
    47: Yes, miss. In the meantime...watch your back.
  • Yamazaki, unlike other targets, sounds more annoyed than scared when confronted by 47 with his gun pointed at her, complete with a fairly deadpan delivery. Instead of begging, she instead requests that she gets one last cigarette or tells 47 (who she nicknamed "Baldy") to relax.
  • One of the Easter Eggs in the level introduces you to KAI's predecessor, a prototype AI named Ayakashi, stored in a Portal-esque metal ball. He requests 47's help in escaping the facility (so he can plot his revenge against KAI for replacing him). You can kick him around while he provides commentary ("Shooting me does not help. Wait. Maybe it does?"), and eventually, you can lead him outside and roll him to the boundary of the map, free at last.
    Ayakashi: Thank you for setting me free! (starts rolling downhill) I will always remember yooouuu…
  • A series of challenges involves killing or subduing people in contracts wearing a familiar yellow motorcyclist outfit.
    • Better yet, wearing the disguise and turning the sauna's temperature up allows 47 to relax in the sauna without dying. Yamazaki simply stares at him while staying silent.
  • If you are wearing the Elite Bodyguard Suit and you pass the Female Doctor in the garage:
  • One way of killing Soders is to take over the controls to the surgery table and... play Hitmine. When you beat the game, the operating room explodes. And the victory tune is an 8-bit version of Ave Maria!
  • The default way to enter the level is, unlike all the others with 47 smoothly entering from off screen, him instead laying in a hotel bed in a robe, stiff as a board with his usual stone-cold expression, trying and failing to relax.

Elusive Targets

  • Pavel Frydel, an Elusive Target, can be found having a conversation with a security guard, where he mistakes the guard's requests for steroids (specifically, the guard talks how he wants to try an experimental therapy all his friends have gotten, and how they all compare their sizes, and he hates to have the smallest muscles of the group) for something else and mentions he experimented in medical school. The guard does pick up on what Dr. Frydal was implying, but is quick to clarify Not That There's Anything Wrong with That. Frydel tells him to shut up.

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