As a Moments subpage, all spoilers are unmarked as per policy. You Have Been Warned.
General
- The Steam page's bullet-point features list includes the following:So many Dad puns. Like, to the point where it made us all uncomfortable
- The conga line of grill puns at the barbecue.
- The amount of Dad Jokes in the entire game. Ranging from the above-mentioned pun-storm to available options at various dates.
- Amanda's response at the cookout when the player character asks if she's a goth is just a long unintelligible tangent which she yells across the yard:Amanda: I WOULDN'T NECESSARILY TRY TO FALL UNDER ANY ONE SPECIFIC LABEL, BUT I GUESS IF I HAD TO CHOOSE I WOULD MORE DESCRIBE MYSELF AS TWEE HIPSTER WITH SOME NORMCORE LEANINGS. BATS ARE COOL THOUGH.
- If you don't sleep with Robert the night of Amanda's sleepover in the prologue you can wake up early and go to the gym with Craig. Where if you try to keep up with him on the treadmill, you will shoot off the end of the treadmill and crash into the wall.
- At the cookout, if you choose to talk to Craig, Mat, and Hugo the four of you will have a conversation on being a cool father. Mat insists that once your kid is a teenager it's impossible to be cool in your kid's eyes. The player character tries to prove him wrong.Player character: Amanda's 18 and she still thinks I'm cool.Player character: AMANDA, I'M COOL, RIGHT?Amanda just laughs. She keeps laughing.Player character: I see your point.
- From the game description: "Are you ready? Hi, ready, I'm Dad."
- When you meet Joseph for the first time, the player character will remark that kids are tough and that anyone with more than two is clearly insane. Joseph will then admit that he has four.Player Character: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.
- And not only that, but Joseph asks where is the missus (if you chose for Alex to be a man, MC will correct him). When MC says that they are dead, Joseph has a look that clearly mirrors the Player Characters Internal Monologue above.
- Afterwards, he asks MC to close the door and starts fresh. "Hi neighbor. I'm Joseph! I'd like to invite you to our barbecue! I will not mention your dead spouse this time!"
- When the player character responds that he'll come to the barbecue, he hastily adds, "Also four children is a perfectly normal amount to have."
- Amanda knows a lot of Emmas. Emma P., Emma R., Emma S. (who stole a bunch of people's pets). There may come a point where you feel MC's confusion.
- Despite mostly known for being creepy, the removed cult ending only accessible through datamining has some lines which are so (purposely) hammy that one can't help but chuckle:Joseph:Nothing is a coincidence, idiot. No town in America has such a concentration of eligible, willing Dads.Joseph: And I will fuck each Dad whose life I destroy until the shame and stink of their failures has returned our eternal king to life.
- Not to mention...
Joseph: All along you've been living a dream, Daddy. - Amanda's entirely genuine reaction to Mary being... Mary at the barbecue.I love her.
- The MC really takes his rivalry with Brian to extremes. Even just running into Brian on others' dates has the rivalry take over, and gives an option to be extra competitive.
- On Joseph's first date, Brian will brag about how many brownies he can eat, giving the MC the option to brag about how many more he can eat.
- On Hugo's second date, the MC has the option of delivering a full-blown rant about how he will "destroy" Brian and Mat, taking it way over the top.
- Between dates, the MC can be invited to various hangouts with the other neighborhood dads/families, one of which is a tea party held by Briar and Hazel, Craig's twins... and the invitation to which comes in the form of the girls messaging MC from their dad's Dadbook profile, pretending to be him. It comes across the way you'd imagine from a couple of elementary school-age kids who think they're being mischievous by impersonating someone else.MC: How's it going?
"Craig": im still storng.
"Craig": strong. im am strong.
Damien's Route
- Lucien trying to The Cask of Amontillado Ernest. It takes Ernest 20 minutes and Lucien laughing manically to understand what's happening. Bonus points for Hugo pointing out that they spent two weeks studying the story. The other teacher involved is understandably exasperated, claiming they're going to file this whole experience under, "What the hell." To cap it all off, when you get home, Amanda reveals Lucien livestreamed the whole thing.
- Mary's map which includes such wondrous details as:
- Nicknames for every dad:
- Brian is "Mario Batali"
- Craig is "Kale" with a little dumbbell next to his house.
- Mat is "Coffee Dad"
- The player character is "Nerd's house" To which the player character will express dismay and Damien will reassure him with , "At least you're not "Other Nerd's house" and insisting he's moving up the pecking order, to which Mary will agree.
- Joseph doesn't get a nickname. Instead his house is marked "Mary's SICK PAD"
- Robert is just "Smalls" with a little bottle of beer next to his name.
- Damien is "Dames", which Mary consistently calls him, with a little heart. Because you just find out that they're actually very close friends and you later find out they go back very far. It's implied they were childhood friends.
- Hugo is "Other Nerd's House"
- the ocean or whatever
- She went to the effort of drawing a compass in the bottom right corner but she screws up East and West, scribbling them out to correct them and writing "shit" in brackets next to them
- Everything on the map has a drawing of some kind
- She drew cats in the bottom left corner for no discernible reason.
- And she titles it "Mary's map" in the top left corner.
- Nicknames for every dad:
- When you text Damien for your first date he keeps typing. And typing. Eventually the MC gives up and goes to make coffee instead of waiting until Damien sends the message. It's even funnier because the first text he sends is literally just the player's name.
- For Damien's second date, Amanda insists that, because Damien went to all the trouble of writing you a letter, you have to write him a reply via letter too. It can range from very flowery to...very casual. Not to mention, Amanda get a wax seal for you too (for an added effect). It's the face of a cat emoji.
- The player can give Damien a speech in his third date to lift his spirits. This results in the main character recounting a time he shoved ten raisins up his nose just to prove to his father that anything is possible. He then promptly wound up in the ER.Damien: Young children really are resilient, I suppose.
Player Character: Haha, yes. Young children. [internally] I was sixteen. - On Damien's second date, you can meet Robert in the graveyard accompanied by...Robert: This isn't my dog. I found her wandering in the street, I put a leash on her, and now we're walking around this graveyard together. Hunting cryptids.
- This moment is even funnier with the reveal in the second comic that Robert adopted Betsy from Damien at the shelter. So Damien is completely aware of how bold face of a lie Robert is spouting and just plays along.
- The reveal that Damien's day job is systems administrator for an IT company. Somehow seeing the flamboyant Damien in a polo shirt and thick glasses is weirder than seeing him in a cloak and ruffled shirt. He apologizes for being so boring in reality, saying his likes Bruce Springsteen and owns five pairs of tennis shoes.
Craig's Route
- When Craig strips down to his boxers on his final date:Look at Craig's ButtDon't look at Craig's Butt
- If you wind up courting Craig even once you're officially dating, the pair of you will continuously call each other "Bro". It brings "bromance" to a whole new level. There's even a choice that exemplifies this:Hell yeah.Hell yeah, bro.
- On Craig's dates River will have some amazing reactionary facial expressions. For example, on his first date, if you get Craig to kiss your forehead after missing a catch, she'll give you a very nonplussed/unamused look while Craig is very oblivious to your flirting. She also looks ecstatic when you get hit in the head with the ball.
- On your first date with Craig, you take Amanda to watch his team play softball. Since Amanda's relationship with the sport is...troubled, she expects to see at least one child cry, and expresses disappointment at the possibility it won't happen.
- When a softball mom blatantly hits on Craig and invites him out for pizza, Amanda has this to say:So, we're going to Thirsty's Pizza? ...What? It's a real place.
- And it gets better immediately afterwards, when you find out it actually is a real place.
- While eating, a mom named Martha will blatantly hit on a very uncomfortable Craig. The player and Amanda will make a cringe-worthy attempt at helping out Craig.
Joseph's Route
- After being rejected by Joseph in his good ending:Player Character: This ice cream cake is my new boyfriend.
- On Joseph's second date you discover that Ernest has put up a banner that reads "Jesus is cuming". You have to fix it and the MC thinks of three options:"Jesus is cumin""Jesus isn't cuming""Jesus is calming"
- For what ever reason "Jesus is coming" never occurs to the MC. If you choose one of the wrong answers then Joseph will point out the obvious solution.
- During the third date with Joseph, you and he go out on a boat, but get stranded. While repairing the radio, the two of you start having a sweet, romantic moment...until you discover you were leaning on the talk button, and the Coast Guard was listening. The best part? They ship you. They even pull a Leave the Two Lovebirds Alone by saying they can't be there until the morning!Joseph: Hey...were you...listening to us?
Brian's Route
- Can't switch daughters. Amanda is your only daughter.
- The entirety of the second date. Even the correct options lead to hilarious situations. Like stabbing oneself when hooking the bait.
- And then there's this gem:
Player Character: Hey, fish. FUCK YOU!
- The third date, the MC starts to think that maybe Amanda has a point, and then you find out the last game you're about to play is ski ball;
- Player Character: ...I'm the best as Ski-Ball.
Mat's Route
- On Mat's first date, he takes you to see the real-life Canadian punk band PUP. During the mini-game you'll hear them play their song "DVP". If you have the safe-streaming option on though, you'll hear Barry Kramer singing a dull acoustic song about YouTube Content IDs. All while people are moshing in the pit.
- On Mat's third date when he needs someone to fill in for his last act and the player character volunteers the player character thinks to himself:Player Character: YOUR UNENDING THIRST WILL BE YOUR ULTIMATE DOWNFALL accompanied by a very sad trumpet noise.
- Come home from a successful first date with Mat and exclaim to Amanda, "Manda Panda. MAT THINKS I'M COOL."
Robert's Route
- "This is where I come to masturbate."
- Get an S rank on a date with Robert and you might hear him say, "Uh-oh! Where'd my pants go?"
- Another thing he can say is, "I may be bad, but you make me glad." You can literally hear Dan Corpsing as he says it.
- When Robert texts you on the first date, tell him you're working on your motorcycle:you've never been on a motorcycle in your lifei don't think you've ever even touched a motorcyclenice try tho
- If the player is only introduced to Robert at the cookout, you'll discover that Robert does not like it when Joseph calls him Rob. The player calls him it later and he gets equally as testy. So on the third date the player character tries a different nickname:Player Character: Do you really think I would turn down the opportunity to share a fine alcoholic beverage with my treasured friend and accomplice Mr. Robert "Bobert" Small?Robert: If you ever call me Bobert again I will kick you right in the shins. Both of 'em.
- There's a hidden achievement called "Let Amanda say [censored]". On the third date with Robert, when she says she's listening to sad shit, instead of admonishing her for her language, choose the "Fuck it" option and she'll start cursing.
- Robert's texts before each date are very manchildish and just clash with his general demeanor:
- On the first date he comes off like a fuk boi:
you up?wyd- On the second date, which he sends when the player character has already gone to sleep:hey[Player Character]heyhey [Player Character]hey i'm outsidecome outsidedon't make me honki will honkget out here
- And on the third:[Player Character]hey [Player Character]guess who's getting their drink on tonightguessit's youalso me but mostly you
- Select Yeah dude from your options and his response is even better:[Player Character]: Robert, buddy. Tonight we ride.
Robert: yeeeeeeeeeeeeeees - The MC is also just glad to have had prior warning since this is the first text Robert doesn't send in the middle of the night.
- Select Yeah dude from your options and his response is even better:
- Val at the BBQ for Amanda in the end of his route. After giving you the Shovel Talk regarding Robert, decides to go and befriend Mary after, in her own words, seeing her dual wielding wine glasses.
- She also gives her card to Amanda, and offers her to call her over any internship she might be willing to do. Amanda and the PC squee over Amanda's first networking.
- Robert being proud of her threatening you with physical harm.
- While there are a lot of potential goofy moments in the whittling minigame on Robert's second date, of note is that if you choose to tell Robert that the fourth object you carve is a chicken nugget, after he tells you that you'd better not eat it, instead of the screen that follows telling you that "You Made a Chicken Nugget" in keeping with the pattern set by naming the prior objects, it will tell you that "You Made Robert Uncomfortable".
Hugo's Route
- Hugo's biggest problem student, Colin, is a pain but his absurd shenanigans are pretty funny from the outside:Hugo: Colin is still being a humongous shithead, he won't stop sending the same picture of Jackie Chan in a mesh shirt to the printer and it's a nice picture, but it's wasting all my paper.Hugo: Whoops, sorry, meant that for another teacher.Hugo: But seriously, he's insufferable. There's pictures of Jackie Chan everywhere.
- Turns out Colin was doing this to cover up a gambling ring he was running, and bartering in rubber band bracelets of all things.
- "See you in class... bitch."
