Take a drink:
- Every time Cartman has a Jerkass moment or denies that he's fat.
- In other words, just drink whenever he's the focus point in a scene (free advice: avoid Cartman-centric episodes like the plague if you try this).
- Alternatively, drink whenever he doesn't have a Jerkass moment when could easily have one.
- Every time Kyle's Judaism is mentioned.
- Twice if Cartman acts anti-Semitic.
- Finish your drink if someone in Kyle's family exhibits Jewish stereotypes.
- Down the next one if it's Kyle who exhibits the stereotypes.
- Every time Stan is the voice of reason. Take two if it's Kyle instead.
- Every time Kenny dies.
- Twice if it's a reference to the gag post-season 6.
- Every time Butters is grounded.
- Two even if the reason for his grounding wasn't his fault.
- Finish it if Butters actually stands up for himself.
- Every time Craig flips someone off.
- Every time a scene change is accompanied by banjo notes.
- Every time Chef says "Hello there, children!"
- Two if he asks them how they're doing and they say "Bad."
- Every time Mr. Garrison is portrayed in a homo/transsexual way.
- Every time Mr. Garrison has a Boomerang Bigot / Have I Mentioned I Am Heterosexual Today? moment.
- Every time Mr. Garrison teaches the class about TV shows or something equally unimportant.
- Every time someone says : "I learned something today..."
- If it's Kyle, take two.
- Every time a censor bleep occurs in the censored versions.
- Every time Cartman calls Kyle's mom a bitch.
- If you're a hater of Cartman, down the drink in cathartic satisfaction when she catches him.
- Every time Randy acts like an idiot.
- Two if Stan or Sharon Face Palm because of his antics.
- Every time when Mr. Mackey says "mkay."
- Every time Jimmy stutters.
- Twice if he says "What a terrific audience!"
- Every time Timmy successfully manages to spell any word other than his name.
- For the sake of not poisoning your brain, telepathic speaking, both shown or implied, such as in Fractured But Whole don't count.
- Every time Stan stutters the word "friend" in "Kenny Dies".
- Every time Cartman sings an especially campy song.
- Every time the show takes pot shots at a celebrity.
- Play the in-episode curse counter Drinking Game with "It Hits The Fan". That is, if you want to die of alcohol poisoning. Even if you had a relay race with fourteen others, you'll probably all die of alcohol poisoning.
- The same goes with South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut.
- Every time Michael Jackson says the word "ignorant" in "The Jeffersons".
- In "Man Bear Pig", every time the word "serial" is said instead of "serious".
- In "The Poor Kid", every time Mr. Adams mentions Penn State, shows his head shot, or says "we like to have fun here" or anything along those lines.
- In "Fatbeard", every time Cartman says "the fuck?"
- In the three episodes between "Black Friday" and "Titties and Dragons", every time Cartman takes a character through the unnamed homeowner's garden devising a plan to help him and the other character get consoles, and that the rest are there to "help them get through those doors".
- In the same episodes, take a shot for each mention of wieners.
- Give yourself a pat on the back if you actually do it. Two pats and an alcohol poisoning treatment if you manage to keep up with the song.
- In the same episodes, take a shot for each mention of wieners.
- Any time an adult says "My God".
- Any time a Canadian farts.
- Twice if a Canadian says "buddy".
- In Season 19, take a shot for each mention of Whole Foods
- In Season 20, every time Cartman claims girls are funny, take a drink.
- Get out your liquor of choice and chug for the duration of Skankhunt_42's trolling.
- In "Skank Hunt", if you are male, then chug for the duration of the mass breakup scene.
- In "Wieners Out", if you are female, then chug as soon as a penis is visible on screen.
- Take a shot every time the Member Berries say "member". Chug if they 'member something other than Star Wars.
- For that matter, take a shot whenever Star Wars is mentioned outside Season 20.
- Take a shot when Tuong Lu Kim saying "shitty" which it was mispronounce as "city".
- Take a shot every time a character (usually Cartman) makes fun of Kyle for being Jewish, Kenny for being poor, or Token/Tolkien for being black.
- Randy: "This is for what? Arresting me for what? I'm sorry, I thought this was supposed to be America!"