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Detective Heart of America
"Detective Heart of America, the feature film!"
AMERICA!
- Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Berserk Button:
- Naturally, he doesn't take kindly to people who threaten or attack the United States. Doing any of those things is sure to get him to take action.
- He doesn't take kindly to certain series being mentioned or alluded to, such as Garfield and Lost. When Heart of America finds out that Garfield still exists even after the United States have been dissolved, he is not pleased.
- He also happens to take great offense to Pinocchio telling him to "Put on a dress and go home", claiming that he's going to wear a dress and defeat Pinocchio in it. When he shows up in the next day in a dress, the others admit how nice it looks.
- Deadpan Snarker: He's prone to questioning the odd situations he ends up in and doesn't hide his disdain for things he dislikes.
- Eagle Land: Type 1.
- Medium Awareness: Heart of America directly acknowledges his life as fiction, as seen in the quote above. However, he only ever addresses this once.
- Only Sane Man: Often plays this role, reacting to the odd characters and their bizarre behavior.
Reggie the Rabbit
"This job could be uh...very consuming"
Detective Heart of America's partner, who is relatively down-to-earth and tries to assist whenever and wherever he can. Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Made of Iron: Reggie fell from the upper atmosphere, onto the roof of a factory with only a few bandages to show for it.
- Nice Guy: He is very reserved and polite.
- Semi-Divine: Seemingly. Reggie's mother is a 'fifth-dimensional demigod.'
Gorslax
"Oh no, I seem to have gotten myself stuck in a time vortex again, heaven be!"
Reggie's mother, who is prone to giving Reggie grief about his father's garden. Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Deadpan Snarker: Possibly the most snide character in the series, putting even Heart of America to shame. Exemplified by this exchange:Heart of America: Nice beige, family sedan you got here Goreslax.Gorslax: If only I had some fine leather seats for you to sit your precious little asshole on.Heart of America: Alright, sorry. Geez.
- Running Gag: She sometimes gets caught in a vortex that appears out of nowhere, but her reactions to this happening are that of mild annoyance at worst. This even happens when the aliens invade the hotel the Resistance is staying at, but the epilogue states that she managed to survive.
- Sugary Malice: She's good at hiding her scathing remarks beneath a kind, welcoming voice.Gorslax: I wanna make sure my Reggie's okay, and make sure his garden stays good and healthy while he recovers.Heart of America: That's a garden?Reggie: No, it's just weeds. Mom's being an asshole.
Brendan
"'Liquid cool!''"
The last remaining son of Slamzone, who embraces a radical personality. Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Fantastic Racism: Hates Claireland and everyone in it for replacing Slamzone. He doesn't hate America for being the country that replaced Claireland, most likely due to his disdain for the latter.
- Last of His Kind: The last son of Slamzone. Up until he runs out of cube energy and passes away.
- Nice Guy: Is actually fairly friendly and even offers Heart of America some Capri Sun and Sunny-D to drink.
- Totally Radical: Practically the living embodiment of this trope.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: A possible reason why he hates Claireland so much. It was filled with scorpions and nobody did anything about it.
OUYA
"Hello, Heart of America"
The main antagonist of the film, who kickstarts the plot by buying the United States with bitcoin. Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Fiction 500: He buys America with Bitcoin, and it's implied he's done similar with at least three other countries.
- Hero Antagonist: His true goal is to create true freedom by retroactively preventing reality-rewriting devices from ever existing in the first place
The Invaders
"DRR...."
A race of strange aliens who appear not long after the Fug colonies are established.
YLEM
- Hero Killer: They're responsible for the deaths of more than half the cast, including Heart of America himself. It's only due to Jesus's cube energy that Heart of America can return to earth to continue his mission.
- Implacable Man: They slowly but relentlessly pursue anyone who's unfortunate enough to be in their vicinity. Chess Mate happens to be the only character who ever manages to take them by surprise.
- One-Hit Kill:
- Anyone that gets touched by their long fingers instantly explodes in a bloody mess. The only exception is Ouya, who survives getting attacked by one but is left on the brink of death.
- On the flip side, one of them gets killed in one hit by Chess Mate's falling suitcase.
"Native Fugmericans"
"This is how it has been for millions of years"
The native people whose culture involves things such as knots, bugs, and death. They're totally not a troupe of actors who got lost. Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Badass Boast: "Lesson 2: Don't fuck with Y'vonne."
- Blood Lust: Y'vonne is delighted at the notion of her and Madison Square Garden beating each other to death.
- Eerie Pale-Skinned Brunette: Y'vonne, full stop.
- Suspiciously Specific Denial: "We are Native Fugmericans, and definitely not a troupe of actors who got lost in the woods."
- Thousand-Yard Stare: They all do this, on account of being dolls, but Y'vonne's in particular is rather unsettling.
Ulathar
"(guttural noises)"
A strange, horse-like being who Goreslax knows. Voiced by: Jason Steele
- The Unintelligible: Heart of America spends their entire 'conversation' trying to figure out just what the hell Ulathar is saying to him.
Pinnochio
"Oh hey asshole, how's it goin'?"
A former enemy to Detective Heart of America. Even after his previous defeat, he still gleefully embraces chaos and evil. Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Enemy Mine: Cooperates with Heart of America in order to stop Ouya, but makes it perfectly clear that he's not doing it for Heart of America's sake but rather so that he can bring chaos back into crime.
- Jerkass: Loves being evil and treats pretty much everybody with equal disdain.
- Poke the Poodle: Of all the things he could have done, he suspiciously denies that he will dip his balls into Heart of America's iced tea in the fridge and stand completely naked in his bedroom for a couple hours.
The Baby
"Justastupidbabeh!"
A former enemy to Detective Heart of America. After his previous defeat, he seems to have ceased his criminal activities. Voiced by: Jason Steele
I'm just a stupid baby!
- Cloudcuckoolander: Constantly refers himself as a "stupid baby" and just generally acts very oddly. When Heart of America seeks him out for assistance, he's seen jumping all over a garage while making unintelligible noises.
- Enfant Terrible: A baby. Who commits crime. 'Nuff said.
- Heel–Face Turn: While he opposed Heart of America previously, he sides with the heroes once the aliens start attacking and the Resistance is formed.
Madison Square Garden
"My mom, ♪~trampled all over my soft baby face when I was born!~♪"
Voiced by: Jennifer Alex
- Abusive Parents: If what she says about her mother happens to be true, then it can hardly be argued that it was an amicable relationship. Madison Square Garden claims that she was named after an escaped zebra that killed a bunch of children, and that her mom trampled all over her when she was a newborn.
- Blood Knight: She seems to enjoy fighting and violence, if her exchange with Yvaughn is any indication.
- Cloudcuckoolander: One of the first things Heart of America sees her do is go out in the middle of the night to a park, go down a slide once, and promptly return to her residence.
Jesus
"Farewell and good luck. Hullallulluh."
Voiced by: Robert Benfer
- Hypocritical Humor: After Heart of America is killed by aliens, Jesus only has the following to say.Jesus: JESUS CHRIST, WHAT WAS THAT?Heart of America: Iunno, you're Jesus, you tell me!
The Shark Council
"Trespasser! We are the Shark Council!"
Voiced by: Jason Steele
Fannie and Earl
- Voiced by: Jason Steele
Chess Mate
"Checkmate, Heart of America!"
Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Expy: He's more or less the Riddler to Heart of America's Batman.
- Harmless Villain: The closest he gets to killing Heart of America is unintentionally distracting him long enough to get hit by a truck. He still tries to take credit for it.
- Insufferable Genius: He constantly flaunts his intellectual superiority and wit to Heart of America, much to the latter's annoyance.
- Remember the New Guy?: Chess Mate acts as if he's known Heart of America for years, when Heart of America clearly has no idea who he is.
Sabina
"I am the Germans."
Voiced by: Jason Steele
- Affably Evil: Even when confronted by Heart of America after she kidnaps Reggie, she is polite and complies with his demands.
- Creepy Monotone: Though, aside from her introduction, Sabina's really not all that malicious.
- Heel–Face Turn: She's later seen as a member of the Resistance after her brief stint as an antagonist.
