History Recap / OneThousandWaysToDieSeason2

* #146: Belly'd Up: An aspiring belly dancer practicing for an upcoming contest gets her scarf caught on a ceiling fan and accidentally hangs herself.

* #297: A Turn for the Purse: A bike-riding mugger robs a former stripper's (who quit after marrying a rich man) purse at screwdriver-point. He makes a run for it when a neighbor gives chase, but ends up falling off his bike and [[HoistByHisOwnPetard on his screwdriver, piercing him through the heart.]] Just to add insult to injury, his would-be victim then strides over and reclaims her stolen purse.

** Becomes HarsherInHindsight when you consider how many ''successful'' murder attempts of this type there are.

* #412: S**t Canned: A jealous man attends the wedding of a woman he wanted to marry and plans to prank her with a laxative-spiked martini. The waiter he hired to help in the prank, however, [[HeelFaceTurn has a pang of conscience]] and gives the jealous man the tainted drink. When the drug takes effect during the toast, he rushes to find a bathroom, but the bathroom is occupied by a couple having sex. He finds relief in a trash can, but gets stuck. His attempts to get out causes him to tip over and roll down a hill, causing death by brain injury, internal bleeding, breaking every bone in his body, and then some. HumiliationConga at its finest!

* #157: Hydro-Co-Done: A couple get drunk on booze and pills while relaxing in a hot tub. The hot tub malfunctions and continues to drive up the temperature. The couple is too drunk to notice that their hot tub is turning into a pot of boiling water and are quite well done (and we do mean ''done'') by the time they're discovered.

* #590: [=UninTented=]: A nymphomaniac dumps her boyfriend during a desert hike because he can't satisfy her and decides to zip herself in her tent and [[ADateWithRosiePalms jack off]]. The tent is soon carried away by a strong gust of wind and comes crashing down on the roof of a shack, killing her on impact.

* #224: Snakey Breaky Neck: A spoiled rich tool goes off a jungle trail against the warnings of his guide ([[WhatAnIdiot whom he would rather bang than listen to her advice about surviving in the wild]]) and lies down for a nap, only to wake up with tarantulas on his leg. He flees in fear and thinks he's safe, but ends up getting choked out by a boa constrictor.

* #204: Cream-Ated: A man who was (most likely sexually) abused as a child by his deranged uncle wearing a cow costume develops a fetish for [[{{Squick}} drinking milk straight from a cow's udder]]. On this occasion, the cow kicks his head in and causes fatal brain damage.

* #202: Reef Stew: A South Pacific tribe of cannibals who has gone without meat for the better part of typhoon season come upon a couple of drug runners who wash ashore. The overjoyed natives beat the two drug runners unconscious, strip them naked, and boil them alive. At last, [[ImAHumanitarian fresh meat!]] [[AndThereWasMuchRejoicing Praise the gods!]]

* #202: Reef Stew: A South Pacific tribe of cannibals who has gone without meat for the better part of typhoon season come upon a couple of drug runners who wash ashore. At last, [[ImAHumanitarian fresh meat!]]

* #235: Wrin-Killed: A purse-snatcher gets the snot beat out of him when his mark, an [[BadassGrandpa elderly woman]], puts her 30 years of experience in Tae Kwon Do to good use and caves in his windpipe while passersby laugh, cheer on the old woman, and even record the attack on their camera phones. Always remember, NeverMessWithGranny.

* #157: Hydro-Co-Done: A couple get drunk on booze and pills while relaxing in a hot tub. The hot tub malfunctions and continues to drive up the temperature. The couple is too drunk to notice that their hot tub is turning into a pot of boiling water.
* #218: Samu-Fry: Two bored Japanese-American teenagers fight with katanas after spending their afternoon watching samurai movies. As one is about to land the killing blow on the other, his sword hits a power line and zaps him.

* #297: A Turn for the Purse: A bike-riding mugger robs a former stripper's (who quit after marrying a rich man) purse at screwdriver-point. He makes a run for it when a neighbor gives chase, but ends up falling off his bike and [[HoistByHisOwnPetard on his screwdriver, piercing him through the heart.]] As he lies dying, [[InsultToInjury, his victim then strides over and reclaims her stolen purse]].

* #297: A Turn for the Purse: A bike-riding mugger robs a former stripper's (who quit after marrying a rich man) purse at screwdriver-point. He makes a run for it when a neighbor gives chase, but ends up falling off his bike and [[HoistByHisOwnPetard on his screwdriver, piercing him through the heart.]]

* #333: Booty Trapped: A gold digger plays with money she swiped from her stingy father in a secret vault until a freak earthquake shakes the room, causing the bags of money to crush her.
* #412: S**t Canned: A jealous man attends the wedding of a woman he wanted to marry and plans to prank her with a laxative-spiked martini. The waiter he hired to help in the prank, however, [[HeelFaceTurn has a pang of conscience]] and gives the jealous man the tainted drink. When the drug takes effect during the toast, he rushes to find a bathroom, but the bathroom is occupied by a couple having sex. He finds relief in a trash can, but gets stuck. His attempts to get out causes him to tip over and roll down a hill, causing death by brain injury, internal bleeding, breaking every bone in his body, and then some.

* #948: Titty Titty Bang Bang: A wannabe actress working low-level temp jobs decides to give up and become a stripper, but first goes to a plastic surgeon to get insanely large breast implants. Unfortunately, the surgeon was a quack who gave her the equivalent of water balloons instead of silicone implants. A while after the woman boards a plane, the faulty implants inflate due to the changes in atmospheric pressure as the plane flies up, eventually exploding.
* #714: Forked Up: Two pot smoking workers decided to goof around by having one drive a forklift while another rides on a platform while tied to the forklift with a rope. The rope ends up getting caught on another vehicle, constricting one of the stoners until [[HalfTheManHeUsedToBe it cut him in two.]]
* #590: [=UninTented=]: A nymphomaniac dumps her boyfriend during a desert hike because he can't satisfy her and decides to zip herself in her tent and [[ADateWithRosiePalms do it herself]]. The tent is soon carried away by a strong gust of wind and comes crashing down on the roof of a shack, killing her on impact.

* #515: Vike-O-Done: A Viking defeats and beheads a rival. While swinging the severed head in triumph, its teeth hit his leg, causing a deadly infection, which kills him as there was no such thing as antibiotics and doctors back in the Viking days.

* #76: Crash-Endo: A talented, yet very clumsy violinist falls down a flight of stairs while on her way to an audition for her city's philharmonic. More concerned for the upkeep of her hands than her own safety, she makes no attempt to stop her fall and ultimately fractures her skull.
* #505: Vermin-Ated: A robber on the run from the law gets himself stuck in a drainage pipe. He cries and shouts for help, but no one can hear him. Things get worse when rats come to feast on him, [[EyeScream starting with his eyes]] and working their way to his brain.
* #105: French Fried: A FrenchMaid wraps herself up in Christmas lights to do a sexy dance for her employer, an old man already near-death and kept alive by his bedside respirator. Because the wiring in the house is old, a short circuit causes the respirator to shut off, asphyxiating the old codger.

* #186: Die-Agra: A wife in a dying marriage tries to kickstart her husband's sex drive by putting some ground-up erectile dysfunction pills in his beer. The man takes some more ED pills before paying a visit to his mistress, who also puts ground-up ED pills in his drink. This ultimately results in a heart attack due to 900mg of ED pills causing too much blood to rush from his brain to his pecker.

* #485: M-R-Ouch!: During her night shift at the urgent care, a nurse who worked as an Army medic is held hostage by a drugged-out robber. She calmly gives him narcotics from the pharmaceutical cabinet, but it isn't enough, as the robber also wants to rape her. The nurse lures the robber to the MRI room by slowly stripping her clothes and tries to keep him distracted so she can disarm him with the magnets from the MRI machine. When she activates it, not only does it pull the gun away from the fiend's hand, but it also pulls him in and gives him fatal brain damage from the ensuing head-on collision because the robber had a metal plate in his head.

* #611: Boris Bititoff: A group of bumbling Russian soldiers are sent to Chernobyl due to their incompetence. When one of them is denied the chance to get it on with a female comrade, he tries to get his rocks off with a raccoon.[[note]]Even though raccoons aren't native to Russia.[[/note]] The creature bites his penis off, and he bleeds out.

* #712: Rub-a-Dubbed Out: A scumbag who just robbed a blind, pregnant woman of her groceries is running for a cop and hides in a car wash. When the owner activates the maintenance cycle, the robber gets disoriented and falls back on a water nozzle. He gets impaled through the skull, which is filled with so much water that it [[YourHeadAsplode pops like an ugly zit.]]
* #616: Cock-a-Doodle-Die: A cockfighter cheats by putting razor blades on his cock's feet. When it becomes known that he's a no-good cheater, the angry mob causes him to fall on the ground, and he ends up having his jugular sliced by his own cock's blades.

* #332: Little Person, Big Death: After a wrestling match, two midget wrestlers wreck a motel room to impress a couple of groupies. They run headlong at a wall, with one of them busting his head through. The other, unfortunately, hits a stud, causing his brain to bleed and swell, killing him.

* #144: Vegged Out: After getting a date with a well-endowed bicyclist, a gardener decided to practice fellatio with a zucchini. She steps on a hoe, which jams the vegetable into her windpipe and chokes her to death.

* #528: D.U.Die: Two drunks go for a joyride. One of them gets carsick and leans out a window to puke. [[OffWithHisHead He gets his head taken off by a mailbox.]]

* #177: Jack 'n' Croaked: Real world whiskey distiller Jack Daniels (named "Jasper" in this story) tries to come up with the perfect recipe for a new whiskey. After seven tries, he comes up with the perfect mix and tries to put his secret recipe into his safe. Unfortunately, Jasper is too drunk to remember the safe combination and ends up kicking it, causing his toe to be infected to the point that he comes down with sepsis and dies.

* #96: Poi Vey: An Orthodox Jew tries to win the affections of a hula dancer, but his attempts come off as stalkerish and the hula dancer blows him off after he tells her that he wants to marry her, but only if she'll convert. He drowns his sorrows in booze, takes part in a fire dance, and ends up catching fire and burning to death.
* #412: [=ReTired=]: A blind, elderly man sits in his classic Chevy and reminisces before quietly passing away. At the same time, a hoodlum holds up a gas station. The old man's car brakes gives out, causing it to roll down a hill and run down the hoodlum as he makes an escape.

* #655: Two Stoopid: 2 deaths for the price of 1! At the same time, on opposite ends of the country, two idiots decide to partake in extreme sports after drinking beer. One decides to try do-it-yourself bungee-jumping, and dies when he hits the ground because the rope was too long. The other invents a sport called "mattress surfing," in which you ride on a mattress tied to a car going 60 mph. The mattress surfer wipes out and becomes road pizza when he hits the asphalt.
* #204: Cream-Ated: A man who was (most likely sexually) abused as a child by his deranged uncle wearing a cow costume develops a fetish for drinking milk straight from a cow's udder. On this occasion, the cow kicks his head in and causes fatal brain damage.

* #332: The Choke's on You: A midget tries to do musical stand-up comedy so he can make money for his bitchy girlfriend. She gets fed up with his unfunny jokes and hits him in the face with her purse, causing him to swallow his harmonica and choke on it. She doesn't realize that he's not being funny until he finally buys the farm.

* #333: Booty Trapped: A gold digger plays with money she swiped from her stingy sugar daddy in a secret vault until a freak earthquake shakes the room, causing the bags of money to crush her.
* #412: S**t Canned: A jealous man attends the wedding of a woman he wanted to marry and plans to prank her with a laxative-spiked martini. The waiter he hired to help in the prank, however, has a pang of conscience and gives the jealous man the tainted drink. When the drug takes effect during the toast, he rushes to find a bathroom, but the bathroom is occupied by a couple having sex. He finds relief in a trash can, but gets stuck. His attempts to get out causes him to tip over and roll down a hill, causing death by brain injury, internal bleeding, breaking every bone in his body, and then some.

* #238: Washed and Fried: A group of strippers pose as college coeds holding a charity car wash. While washing the van of a [[DirtyOldMan dirty old widower]], the faulty wire of their electric buffer touches some water and electrocutes them all.

* #88: Pussy Whipped: A man volunteers to look after his girlfriend's cat, despite that he has allergies and hates that his girlfriend loves her cat more than him. While drunk, he tries to kick the cat, but slips, knocks himself out on the fireplace, and falls face first into the cat's water bowl, drowning.
* #457: Blend-Dead: A health nut who makes smoothies from the fruits and vegetables in her garden inadvertently poisons herself because her landlord sprayed her garden with rat poison once a week while she was at work and, stupidly, the woman kept drinking her poisoned smoothies in a failed attempt to heal herself.

* #521: Toilet Rolled: A functioning alcoholic construction worker with his own steamrolling business uses a porta-potty, but forgets to put the brake on his steamroller, which flattens him like a soda can getting run over by a car.

* #140: Bitch Zapped: A nagging wife rags on her HenPeckedHusband for his inability to mow the lawn right. When she shows him how she wants him to do it, she runs over the cord to his arc welder (which he was using for his car) and electrocutes herself. [[AndThereWasMuchRejoicing The husband takes a sip of his now dead wife's martini and sighs, "There is a God!"]]

* #198: Samurai Death Squad: Japanese American twentysomethings engage in a dangerous sport where they joust at each other with tuner cars. The fun and games end when one guy gets [[EyeScream a spear through the eye]].

* #115: Lady & the Trampled: At the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally in South Dakota, a chauvinist pig of a biker learns the hard way why men aren't allowed to touch strippers during their performance after ripping a dancer's top off and being stampeded to death by other rowdy bikers.

* #118: Blown Job: A woman with an addiction to energy drinks refuses to give her boss a blowjob in order to get a promotion.[[note]]Yet she tolerates his other acts of sexual harassment, such as staring at her cleavage when she talks to him and pinching her rear end while she's bent over.[[/note]] When another worker, [[BiTheWay who is a man]], does the deed and gets the promotion, the woman chews out her boss for being a pig, and ends up dead from a massive heart attack caused by her energy drink addiction and her anger.

* #235: Wrin-Killed: A purse-snatcher gets the snot beat out of him when his mark, an elderly woman, puts her 30 years of experience in Tae Kwon Do to good use and caves in his windpipe while passersby laugh, cheer on the old woman, and even record the attack on their camera phones. Always remember, NeverMessWithGranny.

* #218: Samu-Fry: Two bored Japanese-American teenagers fight with katanas after spending their afternoon watching samurai movies. As one is about to land the killing blow on the other, his sword hits a power line and fries him.
* #236: Screwged: A Christmas-hating Grinch chases off some carolers with rotten fruit. The spirit of Christmas pays him back with a skull fracture from a large hailstone.

* #202: Reef Stew: A South Pacific tribe who has gone without meat for the better part of typhoon season come upon a couple drug runners who wash ashore. At last, [[ImAHumanitarian fresh meat!]]
* #889: Fiddle Licked: A Middle Eastern terrorist posing as a rug salesman is dispatched by a CIA agent disguised as violinist. Her weapon of choice? [[FrickinLaserBeams An experimental laser gun]] concealed in her violin case which fries the terrorist's brain with gamma radiation.
* #224: Snakey Breaky Neck: A spoiled rich tool goes off a jungle trail against the warnings of his guide (whom he would rather bang than listen to her advice about surviving in the wild) and lies down for a nap, only to wake up with tarantulas on his leg. He flees in fear and thinks he's safe, but ends up getting choked out by a boa constrictor.
* #540: Beer Bashed: A rugby team throws a party after losing a big game. One player, drunk and angry, throws the keg into a bonfire because he wants his beer to be warm like in England. Bad idea: the heat from the fire causes the keg to [[StuffBlowingUp explode like a giant frag grenade]], slicing the player up with large chunks of shrapnel.

* #176: Tree Mugger: To prevent a tree from being cut down, a hardcore environmentalist chains himself to a tree. His plan succeeds, but it turns out to be a bad idea when a [[BearsAreBadNews wandering bear]] sees the man as a free meal and pigs out on his guts and genitals.

* #115: Lady & The Trampled: At the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally in South Dakota, a chauvinist pig of a biker learns the hard way why men aren't allowed to touch strippers during their performance after ripping a dancer's top off and being stampeded to death by other rowdy bikers.

* #485: M-R-Ouch!: During her night shift at the hospital, a nurse who worked as an Army medic is held hostage by a drugged-out robber. She calmly gives him narcotics from the pharmaceutical cabinet, but it isn't enough, as the robber also wants to rape her. The nurse lures the robber to the MRI room by slowly stripping her clothes and tries to keep him distracted so she can disarm him with the magnets from the MRI machine. When she activates it, not only does it pull the gun away from the fiend's hand, but it also pulls him in and gives him fatal brain damage from the ensuing head-on collision because the robber had a metal plate in his head.
* #229: Succu-Offed: Two stoners make off with a stolen cactus to add to their collection. Soon, the two end up having a very bad drug trip after drinking mescaline, causing them to flee in fear. One of them falls on an Agave plant and gets [[ImpaledWithExtremePrejudice stabbed through the heart.]] The other runs into the stolen cactus and gets stabbed through the [[EyeScream eyes]] and brain.
* #432: Coming & Going: A make-up artist with a biker boyfriend ends up having an orgasm while riding on a bike, due to the motor's vibrations. She ends up falling off the bike as it's moving and dies of broken bones rupturing her organs.

* #89: Greased Is the Word: A wanna-be jewelry store robber, unable to see well thanks to the pantyhose he used as a mask, accidentally holds up a gun store. The patrons and clerks, all legally armed and well within their rights to defend themselves, riddle him with bullets, one shot nailing him square in the heart.
* #110: Blades of Gory: A washed-up hockey player in a city league gets into a brawl with an opponent. When his victim is knocked over, the blade from his ice skates slices through his carotid artery, causing the bully to bleed out.
* #611: Boris Bititoff: A group of bumbling Russian soldiers sent to Chernobyl due to their incompetence. When one of them is denied the chance to get it on with a female comrade, he tries to get his rocks off with a raccoon (even though raccoons aren't native to Russia). The creature bites his penis off, and he bleeds out.

* #217: Suck Her Punched: A boxer, [[BerserkButton who doesn't take lightly to being called a lady]], also happens to be a WholesomeCrossdresser. When a rapist tries to attack him (thinking he's a female boxer), the boxer (in a cocktail dress, wig, and heels) knocks him out with a strong right cross (triggered whenever someone calls him a "lady"), hitting him in the temple, causing fatal bleeding in his brain.
* #177: Jack 'n' Croaked: Real world whiskey distiller Jack Daniels (named "Jasper" in this story) tries to come up with the perfect recipe for a new whiskey. After seven tries, he comes up with the perfect mix and tries to put his secret recipe into his safe. Unfortunately, Jasper is too drunk to remember the safe combination and ends up kicking the safe, causing his toe to be infected to the point that he comes down with sepsis and dies.

* #113: Tanks for Nothing: While a female Buddhist meditates in a specially constructed sensory deprivation tank, she is unknowingly joined by a Florida water moccasin, one of the deadliest snakes in America. The snake bites her and kills her with its powerful venom.
* #332: The Choke's on You: A midget tries to do musical stand-up comedy so he can make money for his bitchy girlfriend. She gets fed up with his unfunny jokes and kicks him in the face, causing him to swallow his harmonica and choke on it. She doesn't realize he's not being funny until he finally buys the farm.

* #300: Bad Hair Day: In the 1950s, a woman who loves her bouffant and slathers hairspray on it to keep it lofty refuses to have sex with her boyfriend to keep her hair from getting mussed. While the two sit out on Lover's Lane to smoke cigarettes, the flame from her boyfriend's lighter turns her hairspray-laden 'do into a towering inferno that quickly spreads to her scalp and fries her brain.

* #457: Blend-Dead: A health nut who makes smoothies from the fruits and vegetables in her garden inadvertently poisons herself because her landlord sprayed her garden with pesticides and, stupidly, the woman kept drinking her poisoned smoothies in a failed attempt to heal herself.
* #116: Shanks for the Memories: A washed-up golf player and her husband go at each others' throats during a day golfing. When they argue and confess to cheating on each other while riding a golf cart, the cart rolls down a hill, crushing and battering the angry couple.

* #118: Blown Job: A woman with an addiction to energy drinks refuses to give her boss a blowjob in order to get a promotion (yet she tolerates his other acts of sexual harassment, such as staring at her cleavage when she talks to him and pinching her rear end while she's bent over). When another worker ([[BiTheWay a male one]]) does the deed and gets the promotion, the woman chews out her boss for being a pig, and ends up dead from a massive heart attack caused by her energy drink addiction and her anger.

* #157: Hydro-Co-Done: A couple get drunk on booze and pills while relaxing in a hot tub. The hot tub malfunctions and continues to drive up the temperature, but the couple are too drunk to notice that their hot tub is turning into a pot of boiling water.

* #204: Cream-Ated: A man who was (most likely sexually) abused as a child by his deranged uncle wearing a cow costume develops a fetish for [[{{Squick}} drinking milk straight from a cow's udder.]] On this occasion, the cow kicks his head in and causes fatal brain damage.

* #186: Die-Agra: A wife in a dying marriage tries to kickstart her husband's sex drive by putting some ground-up Viagra in his beer. The man takes some more Viagra before paying a visit to his mistress, who also puts ground-up Viagra in his drink. This ultimately results in a heart attack due to 900mg of Viagra causing too much blood to rush from his brain to his pecker.

* #103: Work of Fart: A fraternity student hires a trainer to help him produce [[FartsOnFire flaming farts]] for a contest. The trainer uses a blowtorch to ignite a fart, only to get burnt by the fireball the student produces.

* #712: Rub-a-Dubbed Out: A scumbag who just robbed a blind, pregnant woman of her groceries is running for the cops and hides in a car wash. When a worker activates the maintenance cycle, he gets disoriented and falls back on a water nozzle, getting impaled through the skull and filling it up with so much water that it [[YourHeadAsplode pops like an ugly zit.]]
* #616: Cock-a-Doodle-Die: A cockfighter cheats by putting razor blades on his cock. When it becomes known that he's a no-good cheater, the angry mob causes him to fall on the ground, and he ends up having his jugular sliced by his own cock's blades.
* #534: Chucked Up: A woman playing out a bondage fantasy for her husband at work via webcam is subjected to a burglary. Unable to do anything since she put duct tape over her own mouth and cuffed herself to the chair, the burglar tauntingly thanks her for her laptop, subjecting her to his wretchedly bad breath. So bad was the odor that she vomits, but because her mouth was taped up, she ends up choking on her own barf.

* #254: Booby-Zapped: A man suffering from crippling paranoia over world events has his house rigged with multiple booby traps. He takes sleeping pills to help him sleep, which have the unfortunate side-effect of inducing sleepwalking. One night, he sleep walks his way to his fridge for a chicken sandwich, evading all of his traps along the way. When he sits to enjoy his midnight snack, he accidentally activates one last trap: [[BoomHeadshot a laser-activated shotgun.]]
* #234: [=ReToaded=]: Two stoners head to Peru for the ultimate high, hearing of a toad that secretes a powerful psychoactive. The mistake a poison dart frog for this toad, and the secretions they lick off the frog are actually a powerful neurotoxin that paralyzes them and stops their hearts.

[[folder:Episode 17: Bringing In the Dead]]

* #297: A Turn For the Purse: A bike-riding mugger robs a former stripper's (who quit after marrying a rich man) purse at screwdriver-point. He makes a run for it when a neighbor gives chase, but ends up falling off his bike and [[HoistByHisOwnPetard on his screwdriver, piercing him through the heart.]]

* #599: Mercury in Uranus: [[TooDumbToLive A pervert who has repeatedly been in the hospital for sticking objects up his butt is in the hospital again]] after "accidentally" getting a shampoo bottle stuck there. After having the bottle removed, the doctor leaves for a while, leaving the man to indulge in his [[{{Squick}} squicky]] hobby by sticking ten rectal thermometers up his rear. When the doctor comes back, he lays back on the bed to hide his actions, only to have the thermometers break in his ass, lacerating his rectum and exposing his blood to mercury. He dies of mercury poisoning while bleeding out.
* #297: A Turn For the Purse: A bike-riding mugger robs a former stripper's (who quit after marrying a rich man) purse at screwdriver-point. He makes a run for it when a bystander gives chase, but ends up falling off his bike and [[HoistByHisOwnPetard on his screwdriver, piercing him through the heart.]]

* #310: Cult Evaded: A Goth teen orphan is subject to an exorcism by her hardcore Christian foster parents and neighbors (who only took her in because they wanted the money and immediately assume she's possessed by the Devil because of her Goth look, piercings, and tattoos). They burn coal and incense in an enclosed tent, which causes the foster parents and neighbors to die on the smoke and fumes. The goth, having been tied to the ground, survives, since the air close to the ground was still fresh, and runs off to go to the mall.

* #714: Forked Up: Two pot-smoking workers decided to goof around by having one drive a forklift while another rides on a platform while tied to the forklift with a rope. The rope ends up getting caught on another vehicle, constricting one of the stoners until [[HalfTheManHeUsedToBe it cut him in two.]]

* #451: Ass-Phyxiated: A chubby-chasing salesman seduces a particularly large-bodied woman. She passes out from orgasm on top of him and [[MarshmallowHell inadvertently asphyxiates him with her ample bust.]]

* #803: Bomb-Bino: A man indebted to the mob and unable to pay them back is forced to [[DigYourOwnGrave dig his own grave]] while a couple mobsters watch him over a relaxing picnic lunch. The man finds an old grenade while digging and, not knowing what it is, throws it at the mobsters. The grenade goes off and kills the mobsters, while the grave-digger is spared thanks to the dirt mound from his digging making a barrier.

* #254: Booby-Zapped: A man suffering from crippling paranoia over world events has his house rigged with multiple booby traps. He takes sleeping pills to help him sleep, which have the unfortunate side-effect of inducing sleep-walking. One night, he sleep walks his way to his fridge for a chicken sandwich, evading all of his traps along the way. When he sits to enjoy his midnight snack, he accidentally activates one last trap: [[BoomHeadshot a laser-activated shotgun.]]
* #234: [=ReToaded=]: Two stoners head to Peru for the ultimate high, hearing of a toad that secretes a powerful psychoactive. The mistake a poison-dart frog for this toad, and the secretions they lick off the frog are actually a powerful neurotoxin that paralyzes them and stops their hearts.

* #177: Jack 'n' Croaked: Real-world whiskey distiller Jack Daniels (named "Jasper" in this story) tries to come up with the perfect recipe for a new whiskey. After seven tries, he comes up with the perfect mix and tries to put his secret recipe into his safe. Unfortunately, Jasper is too drunk to remember the safe combination and ends up kicking the safe, causing his toe to be infected to the point that he comes down with sepsis and dies.

* #412: [=ReTired=]: An elderly man sits in his classic Chevy and reminisces about his life before quietly passing away. At the same time, a hoodlum holds up a gas station. The old man's car brakes give out, causing it to roll down a hill and run down the hoodlum as he makes an escape.

* #332: The Choke's On You: A midget tries to do musical stand-up comedy so he can make money for his bitchy girlfriend. She gets fed up with his unfunny jokes and kicks him in the face, causing him to swallow his harmonica and choke on it. She doesn't realize he's not being funny until he finally buys the farm.

* #479: Fore Head: A would-be burglar hides behind a virtual golf game's projection screen, waiting for closing time before raiding the arcade. When he gets bored, he cuts a whole in the screen to peer out, just in time for a player to send a golf ball at him, hitting him in, and breaking, his skull.
* #333: Booty Trapped: A gold-digger plays with money she swiped from her stingy sugar daddy in a secret vault until a freak earthquake shakes the room, causing the bags of money to crush her.

* #521: Toilet Rolled: A functioning alcoholic construction worker with his own steamrolling business uses a port-o-potty, but forgets to put the brake on his steamroller, which flattens him like a soda can getting run over by a car.
* #559: Mile Die Club: An abusive man follows his now ex-wife onto a plane to stop her from leaving. He sneaks into the cargo bay of the plane she boarded (this story takes place in the late-1990s, when airport security wasn't as tight prior to 9/11), not noticing or caring that planes have that "No Animals in the Cargo Bay" sign for a reason. The man is found dead later from suffocation and freezing to death.

[[/folder]]

* #948: Titty Titty Bang Bang: A wannabe actress working low-level temp jobs decides to give up and become a stripper, but first goes to a plastic surgeon to get insanely large breast implants. Unfortunately, the surgeon was a quack who gave her the equivalent of water balloons instead of silicone implants. After the woman boards a plane. the faulty implants inflate due to the changes in atmospheric pressure as the plane flies up, eventually exploding.

* #948: Titty Titty Bang Bang: A wannabe actress working low-level temp jobs decides to give up and become a stripper, but first goes to a plastic surgeon to get insanely large breast implants. Unfortunately, the surgeon was a quack who gave her the equivalent of water balloons instead of silicone implants. The faulty implants inflate due to the changes in atmospheric pressure as the plane flies up, eventually exploding.

* #590: [=UninTented=]: A nymphomaniac dumps her boyfriend during a desert hike because he can't satisfy her and decides to zip herself in her tent and [[ADateWithRosiePalms do it herself]], which ends up carried away by a strong gust of wind and comes crashing down on the roof of a shack, killing her on impact.

* #444: Deadliest Munch: After burning the roast for dinner, a lesbian tries to lighten the mood by showing her lover the string candy bikini she's wearing under her dress. Her lover partakes of the edible underwear until a piece snaps off and chokes her to death.
* #913: Dead Meat-Eorite: A devout Christian tries to invite people at a pool party to his prayer circle, but ends up getting ignored or made fun of. His antics are brought to a spectacular end when a stray asteroid falls towards the earth and blasts him through the torso.

* #485: M-R-Ouch!: During her night shift at the hospital, a nurse who worked as an Army medic is held hostage by a drugged-out robber. She calmly gives him narcotics from the pharmaceutical cabinet, but it isn't enough, as the robber also wants to rape her. The nurse lures the robber to the MRI room and tries to keep him distracted so she can disarm him with the magnets from the MRI machine. When she activates it, not only does it pull the gun away from the fiend's hand, but it also pulls him in and gives him fatal brain damage from the ensuing head-on collision because the robber had a metal plate in his head.

* #150: Coffin Nailed: A [[ILoveTheDead necrophilic]] morgue worker [[{{Squick}} has sex with a corpse]] before delivering her to the funeral home. He forgets to secure the coffin in the hearse after the deed is done, and when he makes a sudden stop, the coffin hits him in the back of the head and severs his brainstem.

* #657: Dead Heat: A woman has her boyfriend sample some exotic spices. The boyfriend suffers from asthma, which she doesn't know about. He keeps breaking out an inhaler to keep his asthma under control, but when it runs out, he dies from a massive asthma attack.

* #412: [=ReTired=]: An elderly man sits in his classic Chevy and reminisces about his life before quietly passing away. At the same time, a hoodlum holds up a gas station. The old man's car's breaks gives out, causing it to roll down a hill and run down the hoodlum as he makes an escape.

* #599: Mercury in Uranus: A pervert who has repeatedly been in the hospital for sticking objects up his butt is in the hospital again after "accidentally" getting a shampoo bottle stuck there. After having the bottle removed, the doctor leaves for a while, leaving the man to indulge in his [[{{Squick}} squicky]] hobby by sticking ten rectal thermometers up his rear. When the doctor comes back, he lays back on the bed to hide his actions, only to have the thermometers break in his ass, lacerating his rectum and exposing his blood to mercury. He dies of mercury poisoning while bleeding out.
* #297: A Turn For the Purse: A bike-riding mugger robs a former stripper's (who quit after marrying a rich man) purse at screwdriver-point. He makes a run for it when a good Samaritan gives chase, but ends up falling off his bike and [[HoistByHisOwnPetard on his screwdriver, piercing him through the heart.]]

* #310: Cult Evaded: A Goth teen orphan is subject to an exorcism by her hardcore Christian foster parents and neighbors (who only took her in because they wanted the money and immediately assume she's possessed by the Devil because of her Goth look, piercings, and tattoos). They burn coal and incense in an enclosed tent, which causes the foster parents and neighbors to die on the smoke and fumes. The goth, having been tied to the ground, is spared, since the air close to the ground was still fresh, and runs off to go to the mall.
* #463: Smoke-A-Doped: A sex-addicted woman is given an ultimatum by her boyfriend: either she gives up smoking cigarettes or she doesn't get any more sex from him. The woman covers herself in a month's worth of nicotine patches to stop cold turkey, but dies of a heart attack caused by the excess nicotine from the patches.
* #655: Two Stoopid: Two deaths for the price of one! At the same time, on opposite ends of the country, two idiots decide to partake in extreme sports after drinking beer. One decides to try do-it-yourself bungee-jumping, and dies when he hits the ground because the rope was too long. Another invents a sport called "mattress surfing," in which you ride on a mattress tied to a car going 60 mph. The mattress surfer wipes out and becomes road pizza when he hits the asphalt.

* #559: Mile Die Club: An abusive man follows his now ex-wife onto a plane to stop her from leaving, sneaking into the cargo bay of the plane she boarded (before the 9/11 attacks, airport security wasn't as tight, and this story took place in the mid-1990s), not noticing or caring that planes have that "No Animals in the Cargo Bay" sign for a reason. The man is found dead later from suffocation and freezing to death.
* #140: Bitch Zapped: A nagging wife rags on her HenPeckedHusband for his inability to mow the lawn right. When she shows him how she wants him to do it, she runs over the cord to his arc welder (which he was using for his car) and electrocutes herself. [[AndThereWasMuchRejoicing The husband takes a sip of his wife's martini and sighs, "There is a God!"]]
* #331: Texas Fold 'Em: When he was revealed as a cheat while playing poker, a junkyard worker tries to hide from the mob in an old car. Unfortunately for him, that car was scheduled to be crushed, and he ends up crushed with the car, unable to escape when a claw pins his leg to the car.

* #118: Blown Job: A woman with an addiction to energy drinks refuses to give her boss a blowjob in order to get a promotion (yet she tolerates his other acts of sexual harassment, such as staring at her cleavage when she talks to him and pinching her ass while she's bent over). When another worker ([[BiTheWay a male one]]) does the deed and gets the promotion, the woman chews out her boss for being a pig, and ends up dead from a massive heart attack caused by her energy drink addiction and her anger.

* #101: Weenie Roast: Some Christian campers enjoy a drunken game of Truth or Dare. One dare is to go pee on an electric fence. The guy who follows through on it gets a shock up his pee stream and through his weenie, electrocuting him.

* #101: Weenie Roast: Some Christian campers enjoy a drunken game of Truth or Dare. One dare is to go pee on an electric fence. The guy who follows throw on it gets a shock up his pee stream and through his weenie, electrocuting him.

* #254: Bobby-Zapped: A man suffering from crippling paranoia over world events has his house rigged with multiple booby traps. He takes sleeping pills to help him sleep, which have the unfortunate side-effect of inducing sleep-walking. One night, he sleep walks his way to his fridge for a chicken sandwich, evading all of his traps along the way. When he sits to enjoy his midnight snack, he accidentally activates one last trap: [[BoomHeadshot a laser-activated shotgun.]]

* #948: Titty Titty Bang Bang: A woman dreams of being a famous actor, [[ACupAngst but feels she's not well-enough endowed]]. She has cosmetic surgery, then takes a plane to Vegas. Unfortunately, the surgeon was a quack who gave her the equivalent of water balloons instead of silicone implants. The faulty implants inflate due to the changes in atmospheric pressure as the plane flies up, eventually exploding.
* #714: Forked Up: Two stoners decided to goof around by having one drive a forklift while another rides on a platform while tied to the forklift with a rope. The rope ends up getting caught on another vehicle, constricting one of the stoners until [[HalfTheManHeUsedToBe it cut him in two.]]
* #590: [=UninTented=]: A nymphomaniac dumps her boyfriend during a desert hike because she couldn't keep up with her urges. She decides to [[ADateWithRosiePalms entertain herself]] in her tent, which ends up carried away by a strong gust of wind and comes crashing down on the roof of a shack, killing her on impact.
* #123: Tali-Bombed: Two aspiring terrorists build a bomb to attack a police station with. They forget to take into account Daylight Savings Time, realizing their error too late when the bomb goes off an hour beforehand, blowing the two would-be terrorists to smithereens.
* #515: Vike-O-Done: A Viking defeats and beheads a rival. While swinging the severed head in triumph, its teeth hit his leg, causing a deadly infection.
* #444: Deadliest Munch: After botching dinner, a lesbian tries to lighten the mood by showing her lover she also lingerie made of string candy. Her lover partakes of the edible underwear until a piece snaps off and chokes her to death.
* #913: Dead Meat-Eorite: A devout Christian tries to convert people at a pool party, but to no avail. His antics are brought to a spectacular end when a stray asteroid falls towards the earth and blasts him through the torso.

* #76: Crash-Endo: A talented violinist falls down a flight of stairs. More concerned for the upkeep of her hands than her own safety, she makes no attempt to stop her fall and ultimately fractures her skull.
* #505: Vermin-Ated: A robber on the run gets himself stuck in a drainage pipe. That night, rats come to feast on him, [[EyeScream starting with his eyes]] and working their way to his brain.
* #105: French Fried: A FrenchMaid wraps herself up in Christmas lights to do a sexy dance for her employer, an old man on a respirator. The wiring in the house is old, though, and a short circuit causes the respirator to shut off, asphyxiating the old codger.

* #485: M-R-Ouch!: An nurse finds herself being held up by a drug fiend looking for pills. When the pills she gives him doesn't do the trick, he tries to rape her. Thankfully, the nurse was a former Army medic, and she tricks him into coming to the MRI room. When she activates the MRI, not only does it pull the gun away from the fiend's hand, but it also pulls him in because of a metal plate in his head, resulting in fatal brain damage from the ensuing head-on collision.
* #229: Succu-Offed: Two stoners make off with a stolen cactus to add to their collection. Soon, the two end up having a very bad drug trip, causing them to flee in fear. One of them falls on an Agave plant and gets [[ImpaledWithExtremePrejudice stabbed through the heart.]] The other runs into the stolen cactus and gets stabbed through the [[EyeScream eyes]] and brain.
* #432: Coming & Going: A female biker ends up having an orgasm while riding on a bike, due to the motor's vibrations. She ends up falling off the bike as it's moving and dies of broken bones rupturing her organs.
* #150: Coffin Nailed: A [[ILoveTheDead necrophilic]] morgue worker [[{{Squick}} has sex with a corpse]]. He forgets to secure the coffin in the hearse after the deed is done, and when he makes a sudden stop, the coffin hits him in the back of the head and severs his brainstem.
* #89: Greased Is the Word: A wanna-be jewelry store robber, unable to see well thanks to the pantyhose he used as a mask, accidentally holds up a gun store. The patrons and clerks, all with legal firearms and well within their rights to defend themselves, riddle him with bullets, one shot nailing him square in the heart.

* #611: Boris Bititoff: When a Russian soldier is denied the chance to get it on with a female comrade, he tries to get his rocks off with a raccoon. The creature bites his penis off, and he bleeds out.

* #712: Rub-a-Dubbed Out: A real scumbag jacks groceries from a blind pregnant woman and tries to hide from the cops in a car wash. When a worker activates the maintenance cycle, he gets disoriented and falls back on a water nozzle, getting impaled through the skull and filling it up with so much water that it [[YourHeadAsplode pops like an ugly zit.]]

* #254: Bobby-Zapped: A man suffering from crippling paranoia has his house rigged with multiple booby traps. He takes sleeping pills to help him sleep, which have the unfortunate side-effect of inducing sleep-walking. One night, he sleep walks his way to his fridge for a chicken sandwich, evading all of his traps along the way. When he sits to enjoy his midnight snack, he accidentally activates one last trap: [[BoomHeadshot a laser-activated shotgun.]]

* #144: Vegged Out: After getting a date with a bicyclist, a gardener decided to practice giving head with a zucchini. She steps on a hoe, which jams the vegetable into her windpipe and chokes her to death.

* #528: D.U.Die: Two drunks go for a joyride. One of them gets carsick and leans out a window to yack. [[OffWithHisHead He gets his head taken off by a mailbox.]]
* #146: Belly'd Up: An aspiring belly dancer gets her scarf caught on a ceiling fan and accidentally hangs herself.
* #217: Suck Her Punched: A boxer, [[BerserkButton who doesn't take lightly to being called a lady]], also happens to be a WholesomeCrossdresser. When a would-be rapist tries to attack him, the boxer knocks him out with a strong right cross, hitting him in the temple, causing fatal bleeding in his brain.
* #177: Jack 'n' Croaked: Real-world whiskey distiller Jack Daniels comes up with the perfect recipe for hooch, writes down the recipe, and keeps it in a safe. He was drunk all the while, though, and couldn't remember the safe's combination. He kicks the safe in annoyance, hurting his big toe, which becomes infected and causes death by blood poisoning soon after.

* #96: Poi Vey: An Orthodox Jew tries to win the affections of a hula dancer, but to no avail. He drowns his sorrows in booze, takes part in a fire dance, and ends up catching fire and burning to death.
* #412: [=ReTired=]: An elderly man sits in his classic Chevy and remembers the good ol' days before quietly passing away. At the same time, a hoodlum holds up a gas station. The old man's car's breaks gives out, causing it to roll down a hill and run down the hoodlum as he makes an escape.

* #599: Mercury in Uranus: A man ends up in the hospital yet again for [[AssShove having shoved a shampoo bottle up his tocus.]] After having the bottle removed, the doctor leaves for a while, leaving the man to indulge in his [[{{Squick}} squicky]] hobby by sticking ten rectal thermometers up his rear. When the doctor comes back, he lays back on the bed to hide his actions, only to have the thermometers break in his ass, lacerating his rectum and exposing his blood to mercury. He dies of mercury poisoning while bleeding out.
* #297: A Turn For the Purse: A mugger steals a former strippers purse at screwdriver-point. He makes a run for it on a bike when a good samaritan gives chase, but ends up falling off his bike and [[HoistOnHisOwnPetard on his screwdriver, piercing him through the heart.]]
* #102: Dead Weight: A drunk weightlifter lifts up a 350-pound I-beam. He loses his grip on it, though, and it falls on his windpipe.
* #310: Cult Evaded: A gothic girl is subject to an exorcism by her hardcore Christian foster parents and neighbors. They burn coal and incense in an enclosed tent, which causes the foster parents and neighbors to die on the smoke and fumes. The goth, having been tied to the ground, is spared, since the air close to the ground was still fresh.
* #463: Smoke-A-Doped: When denied sex by her boyfriend because of her smoking habit, a woman covers herself in a month's worth of nicotine patches to stop cold turkey. She dies of a nicotine overdoes giving her a heart attack.
* #655: Two Stoopid: Two deaths for the price of one! At the same time, on opposite ends of the country, one idiot tries to bungie jump off a cherry picker and hits the ground due to the bungie cord being too long, while another idiot tries bed surfing on the back of a truck, falls off, and breaks his ribs, dying of internal bleeding.
* #204: Cream-Ated: A man who was abused as a child by an uncle wearing a cow costume develops a fetish for [[{{Squick}} drinking milk straight from a cow's udder.]] On this occasion, the cow kicks his head in and causes fatal brain damage.

* #113: Tanks for Nothing: While a female Buddhist meditates in a specially constructed sensory deprivation tank, she is unknowingly joined by a Florida water moccasin, one of the deadliest snakes in the US. The snake bites her and kills her with its powerful venom.

* #120: Grateful Bed: To avoid getting thrown out of his home when the landlord comes to evict him, an aspiring musician hides in the wall behind his Murphy bed. He ends up trapped, however, and no one can hear his cries for help since his room is soundproofed with egg cartons. He eventually suffocates to death.

* #333: Booty Trapped: A gold-digger plays with money she swiped from her stingy sugar daddy in a secret vault. An earthquake hits, causing her to be buried by her bags of money and asphyxiating.
* #412: S**t Canned: A jealous man attends the wedding of a woman he wanted to marry and plans to prank her with a laxative-spiked martini. The waiter he hired to help in the prank, however, gives him the spiked drink. When the drug takes effect, he runs for a trash can to relieve himself, but gets stuck. His attempts to get out causes him to tip over and roll down a hill, causing death by brain injury, internal bleeding, breaking every bone in his body, and then some.

* #238: Washed and Fried: A group of strippers put on a cheerleader's car wash. The faulty wire of their electric buffer touches some water and electrocutes them all.
* #300: Bad Hair Day: A woman accidentally [[ManOnFire gets her bouffant set on fire]]. The flames reach her scalp and sizzle her brain.
* #539: Micro-Whacked: A junkie high on several types of drugs at once sticks a lava lamp in a microwave to speed it up. The lava lamp [[StuffBlowingUp turns into a deadly grenade.]]
* #88: Pussy Whipped: A man volunteers to look after his girlfriend's cat, though he hates (and is allergic to) cats. Drunk to pass the time and pissed at the pussy, he tries to kick the cat, but slips, knocks himself out on the fireplace, and falls face first into the cat's water bowl, drowning.
* #457: Blend-Dead: A health nut tries making garden smoothies, but poisons herself, since she didn't know her landlord sprayed her garden with rat poison. She drinks more smoothies to try and make herself well again, but just drinks more poison until her brain hemorrhages.
* #116: Shanks for the Memories: A washed-up golf player and her husband get into a spat while driving a golf cart, tumble down a hill (still in the cart), and get pinned under the cart.
* #142: Snake Du Jour: A chef specializing in serving endangered animals tries to cook a king cobra, but [[TheDogBitesBack gets bit and lethally envenomed]].

* #662: Phone Boned: To cure her texting addiction, a woman goes for acupuncture therapy. It doesn't take, though: while the therapist goes to get more needles, she tries to reach for her phone, only to fall off the table and stab herself through the heart with a needle.
* #521: Toilet Rolled: An alcoholic construction worker uses a port-o-potty, but forgets to put the break on his steamroller, which steamrolls over him while on the can.
* #559: Mile Die Club: An abusive man follows his wife onto a plane to stop her from leaving, sneaking into the cargo bay of the plane she boarded (security was pretty lax before 9/11). The drop in atmospheric pressure when the plane flies causes death by a double-whammy of asphyxia and hypothermia (he froze to death while suffocating to death).
* #140: Bitch Zapped: An angry wife gets annoyed by how poorly her HenPeckedHusband mows the lawn and tries to show him how it's done, only to run over an arc welder for the car and die of electrocution.

* #168: Written Offed: When facing foreclosure by a particularly douche-y banker, an immigrant military surplus store owner tries to warn the banker against using a particular pen. The banker really should've listened: the pen had a small-caliber gun concealed in it which shoots him in the head.
* #817: Ball 'N Pain: Two idiots steal a Zorb Ball (a ball you can roll downhill inside) and try to play in it, but end up going down a very sharp incline, breaking every bone in their bodies and their skulls against one another as it rolled at 75 mph.

* #198: Samurai Death Squad: Japanese Americans engage in a dangerous sport where they joust at each other with tuner cars. The fun and games end when one guy gets [[EyeScream a spear through the eye]].
* #856: Shafted: A bitchy office manager ends up trapped on an elevator, which sets off her {{Claustrophobia}}. Desperate to get out, she has her workers pull the doors open so she can climb out. The elevator's hydraulic breaks give out, though, and the descending elevator [[HalfTheManHeUsedToBe bisects her]].
* #343: Smoked: Annoyed that his friend keeps trying to bum smokes off of him, a man loads a shotgun shell with cigarettes to fire at his dumb friend. Turns out, even cigarettes can kill when they fly fast enough at your face.
* #413: Just Plane Dead: An annoying moron uses a remote controlled plane to menace people at a park. He loses sight of the plane when it flies towards the sun, but managed to find it again when it [[ImpaledWithExtremePrejudice impales him from behind.]]
* #108: Exhaustdead: When a woman starts cheating on her abusive boyfriend to get away from him, said abusive boyfriend plans to get back at them by doing a drive-by with a paintball gun. He accidentally backs his car into a pile of trash, blocking the exhaust pipe and causing the car to flood with carbon monoxide.

* #115: Lady & The Trampled: An angry biker pulls off an exotic dancer's top during a rally. Another dancer knocks him down, and he gets trampled to death by other bikers looking to get a peak at the dancer's boobs.

* #118: Blown Job: A woman with an addiction to energy drinks gets passed up for promotion when she refuses to give her boss head. When another worker ([[BiTheWay a male one]]) does the deed and gets the promotion, she goes off on her boss, but suffers a heart attack from a caffeine overdose.
* #335: Anger Damagement: While watching professional wrestling, one guy, who goes off on his friends since he can't contain his rage, run heads first into the television and dies from a triple whammy of glass in his face, a broken neck, and electrocution.
* #235: Wrin-Killed: A purse-snatcher gets the snot beat out of him when his mark, an elderly woman, puts her 30 years of experience in Tae Kwon Do to good use and caves in his windpipe. Always remember, NeverMessWithGranny.
* #98: Huffington Toast: Three huffers get high on aerosol. One of the morons douses himself in solvent, then asks for a light so he can get warm. [[ManOnFire Boy, does he get warm.]] As an added bonus, the two idiots he was huffing with get arrested for manslaughter.

* #218: Samu-Fry: Two board Japanese-American teenagers fight with katanas. As one is about to land the killing blow on the other, his sword hits a power line and fries him.
* #236: Screwged: A Christmas-hating Grinch chases off some carolers with rotten fruit. The spirit of Christmas pays him back with a skull fracture from a large halestone.

* #101: Weenie Roast: Some campers enjoy a drunken game of Truth or Dare. One dare is to go pee on an electric fence. The guy who follows throw on it gets a shock up his pee stream and through his weenie, electrocuting him.

* #224: Snakey Breaky Neck: A spoiled rich idjit goes off a jungle trail against the warnings of his guide and lies down for a nap, only to wake up with a tarantula on his leg. He flees in fear and thinks he's safe, but ends up getting choked out by a boa constrictor.
* #540: Beer Bashed: A rugby team throws a party after losing a big game. One player, drunk and angry, throws the keg into a bonfire. Bad idea: the heat from the fire causes the keg to [[StuffBlowingUp explode like a giant frag grenade]], slicing the player up with large chunks of shrapnel.
* #321: Bad Assid: Four friends experiment with the mind-melting drug LSD. One girl takes two hits and, while tripping balls, tries to do a belly flop into a pool. The pool was empty, so the girl just ends up breaking her back.
* #176: Tree Mugger: To prevent a tree from being cut down, a hardcore environmentalist chains himself to a tree. His plan succeeds, but it turns out to be a bad idea when a [[BearsAreBadNews wondering bear]] sees him as a free snack.

* #948: Titty Titty Bang Band: A woman dreams of being a famous actor, [[ACupAngst but feels she's not well-enough endowed]]. She has cosmetic surgery, then takes a plane to Vegas. Unfortunately, the surgeon was a quack who gave her the equivalent of water balloons instead of silicone implants. The faulty implants inflate due to the changes in atmospheric pressure as the plane flies up, eventually exploding.

* #712: Rub-a-Dubbed Out: A real scumbag jacks groceries from a blind pregnant woman and tries to hide from the cops in a car wash. When a worker activates the maintenance cycle, he gets disoriented and falls back on a water nozzle, getting impaled through the skull and filling it up with so much water that it [[YourHeadAsplodes pops like an ugly zit.]]

[[/folder]