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'''Jean-Paul Philippe''': ''(attempting to ask a hangar for bottles of nitrogen when Tetamenti shows up gesturing at his watch)'' Oh, let me guess, we gotta go?\\
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'''Narrator''': Investigators now conclude that the project manager's lack of experience was a critical factor in the accident.\\

to:

'''Narrator''': Investigators now conclude that the project manager's lack of experience was a [[UnwittingInstigatorOfDoom critical factor in the accident.accident]].\\



'''William Fowler''': It was something new and was to actually assist us in being better prepared and operating more effectively. In hindsight, the irony is, the ''reverse'' actually happened, that additional pressure was put on the crews.

to:

'''William Fowler''': It was something new and was to actually assist us in being better prepared and operating more effectively. In hindsight, the irony is, the ''reverse'' ''[[GoneHorriblyWrong reverse]]'' actually happened, that additional pressure was put on the crews.
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->''(in a reconstruction, Bill Taylor looks through the qualifications of Nigeria Airways Flight 2120 project manager Aldo Tetamenti--a victim of an accident [[TooDumbToLive he increasingly appears to have caused]])''\\
'''Bill Taylor''': He's not a commercial pilot ''or'' a trained mechanic!\\
'''Narrator''': Investigators now conclude that the project manager's lack of experience was a critical factor in the accident.\\
'''Larry Vance''': He was making operational-type decisions on behalf of--or ''instead of''--some of the people who should have been making the decisions themselves and putting a stop to things like allowing the aircraft to fly with underinflated tyres.\\
'''William Fowler''': It was something new and was to actually assist us in being better prepared and operating more effectively. In hindsight, the irony is, the ''reverse'' actually happened, that additional pressure was put on the crews.
-->-- ''Series/{{Mayday}}'', "Under Pressure"
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!!{{Music}}
->''Misguided old mule\\
With your pigheaded rules\\
And your narrow-minded cronies who are\\
Foo-oo-ools of the first division''
-->-- '''Music/{{Queen}}''', "Death on Two Legs"
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->''I don't know how to work email and I refuse to learn.''
->''I keep my most important files in the trash and ''somebody'' stole them.''
->''I always forget to empty my briefcase when I put it in the washing machine.''
->''I can't stop making confetti!''
-->-- Potential explanations for why M. Bubbles lost the players' resumes, ''[[VideoGame/TheJackboxPartyPack Job Job]]''
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->'''Fetisov''': I've had it. I will not suffer that stupidity anymore!\\
'''Burakov''': He may be stupid, but he's in charge.
-->--''Film/CitizenX''
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Cleaning up entries from troper with political agenda.


->''People who enjoy meetings should not be in charge of anything.''
-->--'''Thomas Sowell'''
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->''People who enjoy meetings should not be in charge of anything.''
-->--'''Thomas Sowell'''
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!!LiveActionTV
->'''Michael:''' Darryl will hire some kids for the warehouse. We don't have to worry about internships with them, because they definitely ain't going to college.\\
'''Darryl:''' What college did ''you'' go to, Mike?
-->-- ''Series/TheOfficeUS'', "Job Fair"
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-->--'''Drew Magary''' on the [[UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague NFL]], [[https://www.gq.com/story/least-influential-people-2017 "The Least InfluentialPeople of 2017"]] ''GQ''

to:

-->--'''Drew Magary''' on the [[UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague NFL]], [[https://www.gq.com/story/least-influential-people-2017 "The Least InfluentialPeople Influential People of 2017"]] ''GQ''
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->''The Ginger Hammer makes this list every year, but this year’s a REALLY special inclusion because he inked a $200 million contract extension that ensures he’ll be around to desecrate the sport of football until at least 2024. Think of all the suspensions he’ll botch! Think of the surprising owner feuds he’ll instigate! And think of how low the ratings can get! By 2024, there’ll be six people watching Thursday Night Football streaming on Vudu, and Goodell will [[KarmaHoudini get another extension worth half a billion.]] It’s gonna be great.''
-->--'''Drew Magary''' on the [[UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague NFL]], [[https://www.gq.com/story/least-influential-people-2017 "The Least InfluentialPeople of 2017"]] ''GQ''
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!!{{Tabletop Game}}s
->''Waits was a decidedly unlovely and [[FatBastard markedly porcine]] man whose business practices were as piggish and short-sided as his daily routine...As a result, Sunburst home computers became infamous throughout the industry for being even more unreliable and perverse than you could reasonably expect a PC to behave. To be sure, they had their strong points, but too many consumers complained of migraines, extreme user-unfriendliness, irreparable disk crashes and other ills -- and rightly so.''
-->-- ''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse - Subsidiaries: A Guide To Pentex''
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!!FilmLiveAction

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!!FilmLiveAction!!{{Film}} -- Live - Action



'''Chris MAtthews:''' Well, she seems to think otherwise.\\

to:

'''Chris MAtthews:''' Matthews:''' Well, she seems to think otherwise.\\

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Moved non descriptive quotes to more applicable pages.


!!Fiction

->I made a typo in my annual budget request, but don't worry. [[BadNewsInAGoodWay There are only two things]] you can't buy for the test lab this year: Hardware and Software.
-->-- '''ComicStrip/{{Dilbert}}'''

->'''Chris Edwards:''' Steve, I'm getting a bunch of mixed messages here. Is [[UsefulNotes/SarahPalin the governor]] giving a concession speech or not? Because she just told me--\\
'''Steve Schmidt:''' I've already said this ''five times already''. She is not giving a speech.\\
'''Chris:''' Well, she seems to think otherwise.\\

to:

!!Fiction

->I

!!{{Comic Strip}}s
->''"I
made a typo in my annual budget request, but don't worry. [[BadNewsInAGoodWay There are only two things]] you can't buy for the test lab this year: Hardware and Software.
Software."''
-->-- '''ComicStrip/{{Dilbert}}'''

->'''Chris Edwards:''' Steve, I'm getting a bunch of mixed messages here. Is [[UsefulNotes/SarahPalin the governor]] giving a concession speech or not? Because she just told me--\\
'''Steve
'''Boss''', ''ComicStrip/{{Dilbert}}''

!!FilmLiveAction
->'''Steve
Schmidt:''' I've already said this ''five times already''. She is not giving a speech.\\
'''Chris:''' '''Chris MAtthews:''' Well, she seems to think otherwise.\\



'''Steve:''' (beside himself) Tell her she's ''not fucking speaking!''\\
'''Chris:''' Okay, well, you ''both'' seem pretty certain...\\
'''Steve:''' Well, let '''MY''' certainty supersede '''HER''' certainty! God '''''DAMN''''' it!!

to:

'''Steve:''' (beside himself) Tell her she's ''not fucking speaking!''\\
'''Chris:''' Okay, well, you ''both'' seem pretty certain...\\
certain--\\
'''Steve:''' Well, let '''MY''' MY certainty supersede '''HER''' HER certainty! God '''''DAMN''''' DAMN it!!



->Waits was a [[{{Jerkass}} decidedly unlovely]] and [[FatBastard markedly porcine]] man whose business practices were as [[FatIdiot piggish and short-sided]] as his daily routine. Waits was enamored of the [[EvilPlan Omega Plan]] and the "special" resources placed in his hands by the [[TheOmniscientCouncilOfVagueness Board of Directors]], and enthusiastically took to his role in corroding the world. "[[OurDemonsAreDifferent A Bane]] In Every Computer" would have been his personal slogan, if he'd really had any idea of what those "subliminating subroutines" he was implanting in his products were. Subtlety? Never heard of it! Hey, can you make this one even nastier?
->As a result, Sunburst home computers became infamous throughout the industry for being even more unreliable and perverse than you could reasonably expect a PC to behave. To be sure, they had their strong points, but too many consumers complained of migraines, extreme user-unfriendliness, irreparable disk crashes and other ills - and rightly so. [[SealedEvilInACan The Banes sealed in Sunburst hardware]], tiny though they were, exuded a malign influence that made working on a Sunburst a living hell. Word got around, and the customer base simply fell off.
-->-- ''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse - Subsidiaries: A Guide To Pentex''

->If you see Mr. H in the halls, DO NOT make eye contact. Making eye contact with Mr. H will be seen [[TheParanoiac as an attempt to steal his thought energy]] and will be grounds for immediate dismissal. Yes, even if Mr. H is wearing his [[MagicFeather special hat]].

to:

->Waits was a [[{{Jerkass}} decidedly unlovely]] and [[FatBastard markedly porcine]] man whose business practices were as [[FatIdiot piggish and short-sided]] as his daily routine. Waits was enamored of the [[EvilPlan Omega Plan]] and the "special" resources placed in his hands by the [[TheOmniscientCouncilOfVagueness Board of Directors]], and enthusiastically took to his role in corroding the world. "[[OurDemonsAreDifferent A Bane]] In Every Computer" would have been his personal slogan, if he'd really had any idea of what those "subliminating subroutines" he was implanting in his products were. Subtlety? Never heard of it! Hey, can you make this one even nastier?
->As a result, Sunburst home computers became infamous throughout the industry for being even more unreliable and perverse than you could reasonably expect a PC to behave. To be sure, they had their strong points, but too many consumers complained of migraines, extreme user-unfriendliness, irreparable disk crashes and other ills - and rightly so. [[SealedEvilInACan The Banes sealed in Sunburst hardware]], tiny though they were, exuded a malign influence that made working on a Sunburst a living hell. Word got around, and the customer base simply fell off.
-->-- ''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse - Subsidiaries: A Guide To Pentex''

->If
!!{{Video Game}}s
->''If
you see Mr. H in the halls, DO NOT make eye contact. Making eye contact with Mr. H will be seen [[TheParanoiac as an attempt to steal his thought energy]] energy and will be grounds for immediate dismissal. Yes, even if Mr. H is wearing his [[MagicFeather special hat]].hat.''



->After a career spent focused on promotion, on sucking up to his superiors and frequent transfers to punch as many tickets as possible, [Haris] hadn't managed to acquire all that many concrete job skills. Doing the job hadn't been the point. Not for him. Doing the job got in the way of maneuvering for that next promotion.
-->-- ''Literature/TheLostStars''

->'''Prosecutor:''' Mr. Kornada performed these malicious acts with full knowledge he was circumnavigating barriers that otherwise would have stopped him.
->'''Defense Counselor [[BoomerangBigot Blunt]]:''' [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne Objection.]] Mr. Kornada. [[LackOfEmpathy Does not possess. The levels of empathy. Necessary. To be malicious.]]
->'''Her Honour [[UltimateAuthorityMayor The Mayor]]:''' [[ActuallyPrettyFunny Sustained.]]
-->-- ''Webcomic/{{Freefall}}''

!!Real Life
->Palin:
## An applicant lacking even basic job skills
## Someone supremely un-self-aware or lacking any relative sense of what he/she does or doesn't know.
-->-- '''Website/UrbanDictionary'''

->There is something peculiarly inhuman even about his incompetence.

to:

->After a career spent focused on promotion, on sucking up !!WebOriginal
->''I'm reminded of the time during my three-year stint working for Borders when the CEO resigned and was replaced by the former head of Pathmark.... I'm trying
to remember if the word "book" was even mentioned during the fifteen-minute explication of his superiors and frequent transfers to punch as many tickets as possible, [Haris] hadn't managed to acquire all that many concrete job skills. Doing the job hadn't been the point. Not for him. Doing the job got in the way of maneuvering for that next promotion.
revolutionary new customer service acronym.''
-->-- ''Literature/TheLostStars''

->'''Prosecutor:''' Mr. Kornada performed these malicious acts with full knowledge he was circumnavigating barriers
'''[[http://socksmakepeoplesexy.net/index.php?a=bo Pat R.]]''' on {{Creator/Ubisoft}}

->''I will probably be on Social Security, 44 years from now, before we even come close to a Super Bowl. No matter what we do, who we hire to run this disaster, which washed-up stars we overpay, nothing ever changes. Daniel Snyder is a black hole of ignorance and incompetence
that otherwise would have stopped him.
->'''Defense Counselor [[BoomerangBigot Blunt]]:''' [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne Objection.]] Mr. Kornada. [[LackOfEmpathy Does not possess. The levels of empathy. Necessary. To be malicious.]]
->'''Her Honour [[UltimateAuthorityMayor The Mayor]]:''' [[ActuallyPrettyFunny Sustained.]]
has dragged this team into the abyss. He makes WMATA look professional, Creator/DonaldTrump look tactful, and makes Ann Coulter look open to criticism or other opinions.''
-->-- ''Webcomic/{{Freefall}}''

!!Real Life
->Palin:
## An applicant lacking even basic job skills
## Someone supremely un-self-aware or lacking any relative sense of what he/she does or doesn't know.
-->-- '''Website/UrbanDictionary'''

->There
[[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2015-washington-redskins-1719717871 "Why Your Team Sucks 2015!: Washington Redskins"]]

!!{{Real Life}}
->''There
is something peculiarly inhuman even about his incompetence.''



->There are many highly successful businesses in the United States. There are many highly-paid executives. The policy is not to intermingle the two.

to:

->There ->''There are many highly successful businesses in the United States. There are many highly-paid executives. The policy is not to intermingle the two.''



->He obviously has qualities that I don’t recognize or understand. How can a person who has a 15-year history of failure still keep a job?

to:

->He ->"He obviously has qualities that I don’t recognize or understand. How can a person who has a 15-year history of failure still keep a job?job?"



->As his company was descending into [[Creator/AynRand Randian]] mayhem, Lampert continued to cheerfully inform stockholders that his revolutionary ideas would soon produce earth-shattering results. Reality: Sears has lost half its value in five years...The Sears store in Oakland, California, open for business with boarded-up windows, [[TheCityNarrows has even been cited for urban blight.]]

to:

->As ->''As his company was descending into [[Creator/AynRand Randian]] mayhem, Lampert continued to cheerfully inform stockholders that his revolutionary ideas would soon produce earth-shattering results. Reality: Sears has lost half its value in five years...The Sears store in Oakland, California, open for business with boarded-up windows, [[TheCityNarrows has even been cited for urban blight.]]]]''




->Someone who sucked so much on ''Series/InsideEdition'' that Creator/{{Fox|NewsChannel}} decided to give him a job as a bs artist on its network. Also, he hates celebrities because they wouldn't give him the time of day on said ''Inside Edition'' show. Likes to [[CasualKink use vibrators on himself.]]
-->-- '''Website/UrbanDictionary''' on Creator/BillOReilly

->I'm reminded of the time during my three-year stint working for Borders when the CEO resigned and was replaced by the former head of Pathmark.... I'm trying to remember if the word "book" was even mentioned during the fifteen-minute explication of his revolutionary new customer service acronym.
-->-- '''[[http://socksmakepeoplesexy.net/index.php?a=bo Pat R.]]''' on {{Creator/Ubisoft}}

->I will probably be on Social Security, 44 years from now, before we even come close to a Super Bowl. No matter what we do, who we hire to run this disaster, which washed-up stars we overpay, nothing ever changes. Daniel Snyder is a black hole of ignorance and incompetence that has dragged this team into the abyss. He makes WMATA look professional, Creator/DonaldTrump look tactful, and makes Ann Coulter look open to criticism or other opinions.
-->-- [[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2015-washington-redskins-1719717871 "Why Your Team Sucks 2015!: Washington Redskins"]]

->Larry Kasanoff is [[PrimaDonnaDirector a talent-less, classless scumbag]] that should be banned from Hollywood until the end of time. [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar All of the inappropriate innuendos]] are a direct product of his [[ExecutiveMeddling 'creative hand'.]] I cannot tell you how many times this moron derailed production with his brainless input. [[DevelopmentHell It literally has cost the studio millions of dollars]]. They eventually stepped in and removed him from the project. Unfortunately, that was a decade and millions of dollars late.
-->-- '''Vader Hater,''' an anonymous animator who worked on ''WesternAnimation/FoodFight''.

->Actually, I’m kind of wondering if either one of them has a mastery of the English language after reading the original script for ''[[Film/StarTrek2009 Star Trek]]'', which has [[ClusterFBomb loads of profanity]] ''in the stage directions'', and at times reads like fanfic of [[{{Series/Maury}} the Maury Povich show.]]
-->-- '''Website/TheAgonyBooth''', [[http://www.agonybooth.com/agonizer/Kurtzman_Orci_Directing_Star_Trek_3_Venom.aspx "Kurtzman and Orci to direct (and ruin) Venom, Star Trek 3"]]

->'''Mike:''' Him and Creator/MNightShyamalan, how do they keep making movies? ''(rethinks it)'' I'll tell you, it involves a profit margin.\\
'''Jay:''' Well, the difference is that Creator/RolandEmmerich movies always make money. M. Night Shyamalan's movies keep ''failing'', but he keeps getting work. Maybe he gives really good blowjobs.\\
''(long, awkward pause)''\\
'''Mike:''' ''[[Film/TheSixthSense The Suck Sense]]''?
-->-- ''[[WebVideo/HalfInTheBag Half in the Bag]]'' on ''[[{{Film/Godzilla1998}} Godzilla]]'' (1998)

->Irritatingly, as we constantly see potentially awesome movies dropped from development as studios get jumpy about budgets, it seems like whatever he does, Hollywood just keeps throwing money at him to produce another stinker. How many better films were kept off the screen so that Creator/MNightShyamalan could [[TallPoppySyndrome fart out another one star abomination?]]
-->-- '''Stuart Millard''', [[http://franticplanet.wordpress.com/2010/07/21/the-self-destruction-of-m-night-shyamalan/ "The Self-Destruction of M. Knight Shyamalan]]

->A misconceived disaster, and yet another example of Creator/JohnNathanTurner having no sense that maybe you should avoid putting a complete piece of crap out as a season premiere (See also the premieres of Seasons [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS18E1TheLeisureHive}} 18]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS20E1ArcOfInfinity}} 20]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS22E1AttackOfTheCybermen}} 22]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS24E1TimeAndTheRani}} 24]], and [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS26E1Battlefield}} 26]].) All that can be said is that at least with Season 21 he avoids putting the worst story out as a season premiere. Instead he saves the worst story for an [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E7TheTwinDilemma}} even more important slot]]. Oh, dear.
-->-- '''El Sandifer''' [[http://www.philipsandifer.com/2013/08/your-mom-is-review-blog.html on]] ''Series/DoctorWho'' ([[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E1WarriorsoftheDeep}} "Warriors of the Deep"]])
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->Someone who sucked so much on ''Inside Edition'' that Creator/{{Fox|NewsChannel}} decided to give him a job as a bs artist on its network. Also, he hates celebrities because they wouldn't give him the time of day on said ''Inside Edition'' show. Likes to [[CasualKink use vibrators on himself.]]

to:

->Someone who sucked so much on ''Inside Edition'' ''Series/InsideEdition'' that Creator/{{Fox|NewsChannel}} decided to give him a job as a bs artist on its network. Also, he hates celebrities because they wouldn't give him the time of day on said ''Inside Edition'' show. Likes to [[CasualKink use vibrators on himself.]]
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-->--''Film/GameChange''

to:

-->--''Film/GameChange''
-->-- ''Film/GameChange''



-> As a result, Sunburst home computers became infamous throughout the industry for being even more unreliable and perverse than you could reasonably expect a PC to behave. To be sure, they had their strong points, but too many consumers complained of migraines, extreme user-unfriendliness, irreparable disk crashes and other ills - and rightly so. [[SealedEvilInACan The Banes sealed in Sunburst hardware]], tiny though they were, exuded a malign influence that made working on a Sunburst a living hell. Word got around, and the customer base simply fell off.
-->--''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse - Subsidiaries: A Guide To Pentex''

to:

-> As ->As a result, Sunburst home computers became infamous throughout the industry for being even more unreliable and perverse than you could reasonably expect a PC to behave. To be sure, they had their strong points, but too many consumers complained of migraines, extreme user-unfriendliness, irreparable disk crashes and other ills - and rightly so. [[SealedEvilInACan The Banes sealed in Sunburst hardware]], tiny though they were, exuded a malign influence that made working on a Sunburst a living hell. Word got around, and the customer base simply fell off.
-->--''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse -->-- ''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse - Subsidiaries: A Guide To Pentex''



-->--Final entry on "Mr H's" new security measures, ''VideoGame/FalloutNewVegas''

to:

-->--Final -->-- Final entry on "Mr H's" new security measures, ''VideoGame/FalloutNewVegas''



-->--''Webcomic/Freefall''

to:

-->--''Webcomic/Freefall''
-->-- ''Webcomic/{{Freefall}}''



-->--'''''Website/UrbanDictionary'''''

to:

-->--'''''Website/UrbanDictionary'''''
-->-- '''Website/UrbanDictionary'''



-->--'''Norman Augustine'''

to:

-->--'''Norman -->-- '''Norman Augustine'''



-->--{{Wrestling/TNA}} Co-Founder '''Jerry Jarrett''' on Wrestling/VinceRusso

to:

-->--{{Wrestling/TNA}} -->-- {{Wrestling/TNA}} Co-Founder '''Jerry Jarrett''' on Wrestling/VinceRusso



-->--'''Lynn Parramore''' on {{UsefulNotes/Kmart}} CEO Eddie Lampert

to:

-->--'''Lynn -->-- '''Lynn Parramore''' on {{UsefulNotes/Kmart}} CEO Eddie Lampert



-->--'''''Website/UrbanDictionary''''' on Creator/BillOReilly

to:

-->--'''''Website/UrbanDictionary''''' -->-- '''Website/UrbanDictionary''' on Creator/BillOReilly



-->--'''[[http://socksmakepeoplesexy.net/index.php?a=bo Pat R.]]''' on {{Creator/Ubisoft}}

to:

-->--'''[[http://socksmakepeoplesexy.-->-- '''[[http://socksmakepeoplesexy.net/index.php?a=bo Pat R.]]''' on {{Creator/Ubisoft}}



-->--[[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2015-washington-redskins-1719717871 "Why Your Team Sucks 2015!: Washington Redskins"]]

to:

-->--[[http://deadspin.-->-- [[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2015-washington-redskins-1719717871 "Why Your Team Sucks 2015!: Washington Redskins"]]



-->-- '''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''', [[http://www.agonybooth.com/agonizer/Kurtzman_Orci_Directing_Star_Trek_3_Venom.aspx "Kurtzman and Orci to direct (and ruin) Venom, Star Trek 3"]]

to:

-->-- '''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''', '''Website/TheAgonyBooth''', [[http://www.agonybooth.com/agonizer/Kurtzman_Orci_Directing_Star_Trek_3_Venom.aspx "Kurtzman and Orci to direct (and ruin) Venom, Star Trek 3"]]



-->--''[[WebVideo/HalfInTheBag Half in the Bag]]'' on ''[[{{Film/Godzilla1998}} Godzilla]]'' (1998)

to:

-->--''[[WebVideo/HalfInTheBag -->-- ''[[WebVideo/HalfInTheBag Half in the Bag]]'' on ''[[{{Film/Godzilla1998}} Godzilla]]'' (1998)



-->--'''Stuart Millard''', [[http://franticplanet.wordpress.com/2010/07/21/the-self-destruction-of-m-night-shyamalan/ "The Self-Destruction of M. Knight Shyamalan]]

to:

-->--'''Stuart -->-- '''Stuart Millard''', [[http://franticplanet.wordpress.com/2010/07/21/the-self-destruction-of-m-night-shyamalan/ "The Self-Destruction of M. Knight Shyamalan]]



-->--'''El Sandifer''' [[http://www.philipsandifer.com/2013/08/your-mom-is-review-blog.html on]] ''Series/DoctorWho'' ([[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E1WarriorsoftheDeep}} "Warriors of the Deep"]])

to:

-->--'''El -->-- '''El Sandifer''' [[http://www.philipsandifer.com/2013/08/your-mom-is-review-blog.html on]] ''Series/DoctorWho'' ([[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E1WarriorsoftheDeep}} "Warriors of the Deep"]])

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[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Fiction]]

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[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Fiction]]
!!Fiction



[[/folder]]

[[folder:Real Life]]

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[[/folder]]

[[folder:Real Life]]

!!Real Life



[[/folder]]

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[[/folder]]

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[[folder:fiction]]

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[[folder:fiction]]
[[folder:Fiction]]



->'''Defense Counselor Blunt:''' [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne Objection.]] Mr. Kornada. [[LackOfEmpathy Does not possess. The levels of empathy. Necessary. To be malicious.]]
->'''Her Honour The Mayor:''' [[ActuallyPrettyFunny Sustained.]]

to:

->'''Defense Counselor Blunt:''' [[BoomerangBigot Blunt]]:''' [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne Objection.]] Mr. Kornada. [[LackOfEmpathy Does not possess. The levels of empathy. Necessary. To be malicious.]]
->'''Her Honour [[UltimateAuthorityMayor The Mayor:''' Mayor]]:''' [[ActuallyPrettyFunny Sustained.]]]]
-->--''Webcomic/Freefall''



[[folder:real life]]

to:

[[folder:real life]]
[[folder:Real Life]]
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->'''Prosecutor:''' Mr. Kornada performed these malicious acts with full knowledge he was circumnavigating barriers that otherwise would have stopped him.
->'''Defense Counselor Blunt:''' [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne Objection.]] Mr. Kornada. [[LackOfEmpathy Does not possess. The levels of empathy. Necessary. To be malicious.]]
->'''Her Honour The Mayor:''' [[ActuallyPrettyFunny Sustained.]]
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->Actually, I’m kind of wondering if either one of them has a mastery of the English language after reading the original script for ''Film/StarTrek'', which has [[ClusterFBomb loads of profanity]] ''in the stage directions'', and at times reads like fanfic of [[{{Series/Maury}} the Maury Povich show.]]
-->--'''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''', [[http://www.agonybooth.com/agonizer/Kurtzman_Orci_Directing_Star_Trek_3_Venom.aspx "Kurtzman and Orci to direct (and ruin) Venom, Star Trek 3"]]

to:

->Actually, I’m kind of wondering if either one of them has a mastery of the English language after reading the original script for ''Film/StarTrek'', ''[[Film/StarTrek2009 Star Trek]]'', which has [[ClusterFBomb loads of profanity]] ''in the stage directions'', and at times reads like fanfic of [[{{Series/Maury}} the Maury Povich show.]]
-->--'''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''', -->-- '''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''', [[http://www.agonybooth.com/agonizer/Kurtzman_Orci_Directing_Star_Trek_3_Venom.aspx "Kurtzman and Orci to direct (and ruin) Venom, Star Trek 3"]]
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-->--'''Phil Sandifer''' [[http://www.philipsandifer.com/2013/08/your-mom-is-review-blog.html on]] ''Series/DoctorWho'' ([[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E1WarriorsoftheDeep}} "Warriors of the Deep"]])

to:

-->--'''Phil -->--'''El Sandifer''' [[http://www.philipsandifer.com/2013/08/your-mom-is-review-blog.html on]] ''Series/DoctorWho'' ([[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E1WarriorsoftheDeep}} "Warriors of the Deep"]])
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->After a career spent focused on promotion, on sucking up to his superiors and frequent transfers to punch as many tickets as possible, [Haris] hadn't managed to acquire all that many concrete job skills. Doing the job hadn't been the point. Not for him. Doing the job got in the way of maneuvering for that next promotion.
-->-- ''Literature/TheLostStars''
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->If you see Mr. H in the halls, DO NOT make eye contact. Making eye contact with Mr. H will be seen [[TheParanoiac as an attempt to steal his thought energy]] and will be grounds for immediate dismissal. Yes, even if Mr. H is wearing his [[MagicFeather special hat]].
-->--Final entry on "Mr H's" new security measures, ''VideoGame/FalloutNewVegas''
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-->--'''''Website/UrbanDictionary''''' on BillOReilly

to:

-->--'''''Website/UrbanDictionary''''' on BillOReilly
Creator/BillOReilly
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->Waits was a [[[{Jerkass}} decidedly unlovely]] and [[FatBastard markedly porcine]] man whose business practices were as [[FatIdiot piggish and short-sided]] as his daily routine. Waits was enamored of the [[EvilPlan Omega Plan]] and the "special" resources placed in his hands by the [[TheOmniscientCouncilOfVagueness Board of Directors]], and enthusiastically took to his role in corroding the world. "[[OurDemonsAreDifferent A Bane]] In Every Computer" would have been his personal slogan, if he'd really had any idea of what those "subliminating subroutines" he was implanting in his products were. Subtlety? Never heard of it! Hey, can you make this one even nastier?

to:

->Waits was a [[[{Jerkass}} [[{{Jerkass}} decidedly unlovely]] and [[FatBastard markedly porcine]] man whose business practices were as [[FatIdiot piggish and short-sided]] as his daily routine. Waits was enamored of the [[EvilPlan Omega Plan]] and the "special" resources placed in his hands by the [[TheOmniscientCouncilOfVagueness Board of Directors]], and enthusiastically took to his role in corroding the world. "[[OurDemonsAreDifferent A Bane]] In Every Computer" would have been his personal slogan, if he'd really had any idea of what those "subliminating subroutines" he was implanting in his products were. Subtlety? Never heard of it! Hey, can you make this one even nastier?
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->Waits was a [[[{Jerkass}} decidedly unlovely]] and [[FatBastard markedly porcine]] man whose business practices were as [[FatIdiot piggish and short-sided]] as his daily routine. Waits was enamored of the [[EvilPlan Omega Plan]] and the "special" resources placed in his hands by the [[TheOmniscientCouncilOfVagueness Board of Directors]], and enthusiastically took to his role in corroding the world. "[[OurDemonsAreDifferent A Bane]] In Every Computer" would have been his personal slogan, if he'd really had any idea of what those "subliminating subroutines" he was implanting in his products were. Subtlety? Never heard of it! Hey, can you make this one even nastier?
-> As a result, Sunburst home computers became infamous throughout the industry for being even more unreliable and perverse than you could reasonably expect a PC to behave. To be sure, they had their strong points, but too many consumers complained of migraines, extreme user-unfriendliness, irreparable disk crashes and other ills - and rightly so. [[SealedEvilInACan The Banes sealed in Sunburst hardware]], tiny though they were, exuded a malign influence that made working on a Sunburst a living hell. Word got around, and the customer base simply fell off.
-->--''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse - Subsidiaries: A Guide To Pentex''

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->Only a fucking idiot would think it was a good idea to provide less parking and fewer trains for the Super Bowl than they do for a normal game.
-->--'''''Deadspin''''', [[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2014-new-york-giants-1630014411 "Why Your Team Sucks 2014: New York Giants"]]

->I covered the Cowboys for NBC's Dallas affiliate for a few years, and covering the Cowboys is an easy job because Jerry Jones [[AttentionWhore never stops talking]] to the media, and is a completely fucking insane person. He is a man who abhors a vacuum. He tolerates neither quiet failure nor quiet success. If a week passes without the Double J having done or said something completely stupid, he will cry out, 'JEEZUM CROW I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING STUPID TODAY!' and go running for the nearest camera.
-->--'''[[http://deadspin.com/jerry-jones-is-fucking-crazy-1651689269 Drew McGary]]''', "Jerry Jones Is Fucking Crazy"

to:

->Only a fucking idiot would think it was a good idea ->I will probably be on Social Security, 44 years from now, before we even come close to provide less parking and fewer trains for the a Super Bowl than they do for Bowl. No matter what we do, who we hire to run this disaster, which washed-up stars we overpay, nothing ever changes. Daniel Snyder is a normal game.
-->--'''''Deadspin''''', [[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2014-new-york-giants-1630014411
black hole of ignorance and incompetence that has dragged this team into the abyss. He makes WMATA look professional, Creator/DonaldTrump look tactful, and makes Ann Coulter look open to criticism or other opinions.
-->--[[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2015-washington-redskins-1719717871
"Why Your Team Sucks 2014: New York Giants"]]

->I covered the Cowboys for NBC's Dallas affiliate for a few years, and covering the Cowboys is an easy job because Jerry Jones [[AttentionWhore never stops talking]] to the media, and is a completely fucking insane person. He is a man who abhors a vacuum. He tolerates neither quiet failure nor quiet success. If a week passes without the Double J having done or said something completely stupid, he will cry out, 'JEEZUM CROW I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING STUPID TODAY!' and go running for the nearest camera.
-->--'''[[http://deadspin.com/jerry-jones-is-fucking-crazy-1651689269 Drew McGary]]''', "Jerry Jones Is Fucking Crazy"
2015!: Washington Redskins"]]
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->NIrritatingly, as we constantly see potentially awesome movies dropped from development as studios get jumpy about budgets, it seems like whatever he does, Hollywood just keeps throwing money at him to produce another stinker. How many better films were kept off the screen so that Creator/MNightShyamalan could [[TallPoppySyndrome fart out another one star abomination?]]

to:

->NIrritatingly, ->Irritatingly, as we constantly see potentially awesome movies dropped from development as studios get jumpy about budgets, it seems like whatever he does, Hollywood just keeps throwing money at him to produce another stinker. How many better films were kept off the screen so that Creator/MNightShyamalan could [[TallPoppySyndrome fart out another one star abomination?]]
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->I'm reminded of the time during my three-year stint working for Borders when the CEO resigned and was replaced by the former head of Pathmark. Somebody who didn't care or know anything about books was suddenly calling the shots at a national bookstore chain. You don't need me to tell you the company didn't exactly turn around under his leadership. I almost wish I swiped one of the training videos that came out when he "refocused" the stores' selling procedures... I'm trying to remember if the word "book" was even mentioned during the fifteen-minute explication of his revolutionary new customer service acronym.

to:

->I'm reminded of the time during my three-year stint working for Borders when the CEO resigned and was replaced by the former head of Pathmark. Somebody who didn't care or know anything about books was suddenly calling the shots at a national bookstore chain. You don't need me to tell you the company didn't exactly turn around under his leadership. I almost wish I swiped one of the training videos that came out when he "refocused" the stores' selling procedures...Pathmark.... I'm trying to remember if the word "book" was even mentioned during the fifteen-minute explication of his revolutionary new customer service acronym.



->Who is John Lee Hancock? No one, that’s who. I had to check Website/{{IMDb}} to see what (if anything) the guy had done. His only big movie is ''Film/TheRookie''. Well, now that I know that, he’s the perfect person to direct our $100 million dollar historical epic.
-->--'''[[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Miles Antwiler]]''' [[http://moviemoses.wordpress.com/2010/01/27/the-alamo-2004-john-lee-hancock/ on]] ''Film/TheAlamo'' (2004)

to:

->Who is John Lee Hancock? No one, that’s who. I had to check Website/{{IMDb}} to see what (if anything) ->Actually, I’m kind of wondering if either one of them has a mastery of the guy had done. His only big movie is ''Film/TheRookie''. Well, now that I know that, he’s English language after reading the perfect person original script for ''Film/StarTrek'', which has [[ClusterFBomb loads of profanity]] ''in the stage directions'', and at times reads like fanfic of [[{{Series/Maury}} the Maury Povich show.]]
-->--'''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''', [[http://www.agonybooth.com/agonizer/Kurtzman_Orci_Directing_Star_Trek_3_Venom.aspx "Kurtzman and Orci
to direct our $100 million dollar historical epic.
-->--'''[[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Miles Antwiler]]''' [[http://moviemoses.wordpress.com/2010/01/27/the-alamo-2004-john-lee-hancock/ on]] ''Film/TheAlamo'' (2004)
(and ruin) Venom, Star Trek 3"]]



->Night’s ''Film/AfterEarth'' production tweets were something to behold, as he simpered on about each shot and edit evoking the emotional wonder and power of cinema, like a blind man telling you how clever his dog is, while stroking a furry toilet seat with a collar on it. Irritatingly, as we constantly see potentially awesome movies dropped from development as studios get jumpy about budgets, it seems like whatever he does, Hollywood just keeps throwing money at him to produce another stinker. How many better films were kept off the screen so that Creator/MNightShyamalan could [[TallPoppySyndrome fart out another one star abomination?]]

to:

->Night’s ''Film/AfterEarth'' production tweets were something to behold, as he simpered on about each shot and edit evoking the emotional wonder and power of cinema, like a blind man telling you how clever his dog is, while stroking a furry toilet seat with a collar on it. Irritatingly, ->NIrritatingly, as we constantly see potentially awesome movies dropped from development as studios get jumpy about budgets, it seems like whatever he does, Hollywood just keeps throwing money at him to produce another stinker. How many better films were kept off the screen so that Creator/MNightShyamalan could [[TallPoppySyndrome fart out another one star abomination?]]

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->The best thing about Hughes has been his withdrawal from the world--for this, if nothing else, he [[AndThereWasMuchRejoicing ought not only to be honored but encouraged by a grateful nation]]. Yet even in the shadows of his cloistered motels, the inept tycoon insists on pulling strings, making a mess of TWA, a disaster of RKO, a shambles of vice in Las Vegas, all while creating the largest unworkable plywood plane in the world at a cost to the taxpayers of twenty-two million dollars. There is something peculiarly inhuman even about his incompetence.

to:

->The best thing about Hughes has been his withdrawal from the world--for this, if nothing else, he [[AndThereWasMuchRejoicing ought not only to be honored but encouraged by a grateful nation]]. Yet even in the shadows of his cloistered motels, the inept tycoon insists on pulling strings, making a mess of TWA, a disaster of RKO, a shambles of vice in Las Vegas, all while creating the largest unworkable plywood plane in the world at a cost to the taxpayers of twenty-two million dollars. There ->There is something peculiarly inhuman even about his incompetence.



->Todd Akin has made several legitimate mistakes over the course of his flaccid political career. Appearing on MSNBC today to say more stupid shit about rape was among them, and judging by his apparent [[IgnorantOfTheirOwnIgnorance dogged wrongness]] in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary, it won't be the last....Akin remains an object lesson on the sort of person who should not run for treasurer of the local Rotary Club, much less the US Senate. The sort of person who, simply by opening his mouth, undoes months of efforts on the part of Republicans who are trying to build a more woman-friendly image in the runup to midterms. He is to the American conservative movement what [[Film/TheGodfather Fredo was to the Corleones]]. Even has the same hairline.
-->--'''''Jezebel''''', [[http://jezebel.com/todd-akin-went-on-tv-to-talk-about-rape-again-it-did-n-1606588403 "Todd Akin Went On TV To Talk About Rape Again. It Did Not Go Well."]]



->{{Wrestling/WCW}} hired a business manager named Jim Herd, a man who knew absolutely nothing about wrestling, he only knew he had a show about it [[TaughtByTelevision on one of his TV stations.]] Herd had the brilliant idea of coming up with the "Ding Dongs" gimmick, a tag team called the Hunchbacks who couldn't be pinned because "hurr durr hunched back", a lumberjack gimmick that involved dancing bears, trying to involve Stan Hansen in a comedy gimmick revolving around some stupid ass cowboys, pissing off Wrestling/JimCornette and [[Wrestling/TheFabulousOnes Stan Lane]], the Wrestling/RoadWarriors and most notably Wrestling/RicFlair, who Herd had the absolutely brilliant idea of repackaging as "Spartacus" and having him shave his hair. Herd fired Flair and then stripped him of the WCW championship, however [[DidntThinkThisThrough the actual title was still in Flair's possession]] and showed up on a {{Wrestling/WWF}} TV taping.
-->--'''''Taimapedia'''''

->See, he was running a video store before [[Wrestling/VinceMcMahon Vince (McMahon)]] let him write for the magazine...He ''can't spell.'' He can't write or speak English! He 'grew up in Brooklyn n' da Bronx or whateva' -- I'm looking at the guy's pad: he can't spell, okay? It's not like he's a goddamn Rhodes scholar...So he's writing for the magazine. He insinuates himself. He's got good ideas. He has good ideas at a time when they ''need'' good ideas. And, you know, I'm not saying he's never had any good ideas. But you know what the problem is? The problem is that all the good ideas he's ever had is from watching [[SerialNumbersFiledOff those goddamn, cheap-ass B-movies]] that they used to rent at his goddamn loser video store. He doesn't know anything about wrestling. That's why when you hear 'ding ding ding!', it's immediately followed 60 seconds later by 'ding ding ding!' Keep the matches as short as possible. When that bell rings, Vince Russo is lost. Vince Russo is a babe in the woods. Vince Russo is a deer caught in the headlights, as long as there's a wrestling match going on.
-->--'''Wrestling/JimCornette''' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMm0Alg0bvs on]] Vince Russo

->Lampert is now known as one of the worst [=CEOs=] in America — the man who flushed Sears down the toilet with his demented management style and harebrained approach to retail. Sears stock is tanking. His hedge fund is down 40 percent, and the business press has turned from praising Lampert’s genius to watching gleefully as his ship sinks. Investors are running from “Crazy Eddie” like the plague...As his company was descending into [[Creator/AynRand Randian]] mayhem, Lampert continued to cheerfully inform stockholders that his revolutionary ideas would soon produce earth-shattering results. Reality: Sears has lost half its value in five years. Since 2010, Sears has closed more than half of its stores. Sears Holdings is financially distressed and Lampert’s own hedge fund has reduced its stake in the company. The Sears store in Oakland, California, open for business with boarded-up windows, [[TheCityNarrows has even been cited for urban blight.]]

to:

->{{Wrestling/WCW}} hired a business manager named Jim Herd, a man who knew absolutely nothing about wrestling, he only knew he had a show about it [[TaughtByTelevision on one of his TV stations.]] Herd had the brilliant idea of coming up with the "Ding Dongs" gimmick, a tag team called the Hunchbacks who couldn't be pinned because "hurr durr hunched back", a lumberjack gimmick that involved dancing bears, trying to involve Stan Hansen in a comedy gimmick revolving around some stupid ass cowboys, pissing off Wrestling/JimCornette and [[Wrestling/TheFabulousOnes Stan Lane]], the Wrestling/RoadWarriors and most notably Wrestling/RicFlair, who Herd had the absolutely brilliant idea of repackaging as "Spartacus" and having him shave his hair. Herd fired Flair and then stripped him of the WCW championship, however [[DidntThinkThisThrough the actual title was still in Flair's possession]] and showed up on a {{Wrestling/WWF}} TV taping.
-->--'''''Taimapedia'''''

->See, he was running a video store before [[Wrestling/VinceMcMahon Vince (McMahon)]] let him write for the magazine...He ''can't spell.'' He can't write or speak English! He 'grew up in Brooklyn n' da Bronx or whateva' -- I'm looking at the guy's pad: he can't spell, okay? It's not like he's a goddamn Rhodes scholar...So he's writing for the magazine. He insinuates himself. He's got good ideas. He has good ideas at a time when they ''need'' good ideas. And, you know, I'm not saying he's never had any good ideas. But you know what the problem is? The problem is that all the good ideas he's ever had is from watching [[SerialNumbersFiledOff those goddamn, cheap-ass B-movies]] that they used to rent at his goddamn loser video store. He doesn't know anything about wrestling. That's why when you hear 'ding ding ding!', it's immediately followed 60 seconds later by 'ding ding ding!' Keep the matches as short as possible. When that bell rings, Vince Russo is lost. Vince Russo is a babe in the woods. Vince Russo is a deer caught in the headlights, as long as there's a wrestling match going on.
-->--'''Wrestling/JimCornette''' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMm0Alg0bvs on]] Vince Russo

->Lampert is now known as one of the worst [=CEOs=] in America — the man who flushed Sears down the toilet with his demented management style and harebrained approach to retail. Sears stock is tanking. His hedge fund is down 40 percent, and the business press has turned from praising Lampert’s genius to watching gleefully as his ship sinks. Investors are running from “Crazy Eddie” like the plague...As
->As his company was descending into [[Creator/AynRand Randian]] mayhem, Lampert continued to cheerfully inform stockholders that his revolutionary ideas would soon produce earth-shattering results. Reality: Sears has lost half its value in five years. Since 2010, Sears has closed more than half of its stores. Sears Holdings is financially distressed and Lampert’s own hedge fund has reduced its stake in the company. years...The Sears store in Oakland, California, open for business with boarded-up windows, [[TheCityNarrows has even been cited for urban blight.]]



->I'm reminded of the time during my three-year stint working for Borders when the CEO resigned and was replaced by the former head of Pathmark ''(a New York-area grocery chain, now owned by A&P)''. Somebody who didn't care or know anything about books was suddenly calling the shots at a national bookstore chain. You don't need me to tell you the company didn't exactly turn around under his leadership. I almost wish I swiped one of the training videos that came out when he "refocused" the stores' selling procedures... I'm trying to remember if the word "book" was even mentioned during the fifteen-minute explication of his revolutionary new customer service acronym.

to:

->I'm reminded of the time during my three-year stint working for Borders when the CEO resigned and was replaced by the former head of Pathmark ''(a New York-area grocery chain, now owned by A&P)''.Pathmark. Somebody who didn't care or know anything about books was suddenly calling the shots at a national bookstore chain. You don't need me to tell you the company didn't exactly turn around under his leadership. I almost wish I swiped one of the training videos that came out when he "refocused" the stores' selling procedures... I'm trying to remember if the word "book" was even mentioned during the fifteen-minute explication of his revolutionary new customer service acronym.



->It was only a matter of time before Jerry Jones fucked it all up. I covered the Cowboys for NBC's Dallas affiliate for a few years, and covering the Cowboys is an easy job because Jerry Jones [[AttentionWhore never stops talking]] to the media, and is a completely fucking insane person. He is a man who abhors a vacuum. He tolerates neither quiet failure nor quiet success. If a week passes without the Double J having done or said something completely stupid, he will cry out, 'JEEZUM CROW I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING STUPID TODAY!' and go running for the nearest camera. He's [[TallPoppySyndrome fired Jimmy Johnson]], [[TheDilbertPrinciple hired Barry Switzer]], installed [[TestosteronePoisoning cage dancers]] in his stadium, stretched out his face to look like a villain in a Creator/TerryGilliam movie, tampered with Adrian Peterson, [[DirtyOldMan rubbed his crotch on people]], employed BOTH Roy Williamses, and in general has done everything possible to run the Cowboys into the ground... In every Cowboys season, there is at least one moment in which the Double J dismantles the authority of his coaching staff in plain view of millions, and everything falls apart shortly thereafter.

to:

->It was only a matter of time before Jerry Jones fucked it all up. I ->I covered the Cowboys for NBC's Dallas affiliate for a few years, and covering the Cowboys is an easy job because Jerry Jones [[AttentionWhore never stops talking]] to the media, and is a completely fucking insane person. He is a man who abhors a vacuum. He tolerates neither quiet failure nor quiet success. If a week passes without the Double J having done or said something completely stupid, he will cry out, 'JEEZUM CROW I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING STUPID TODAY!' and go running for the nearest camera. He's [[TallPoppySyndrome fired Jimmy Johnson]], [[TheDilbertPrinciple hired Barry Switzer]], installed [[TestosteronePoisoning cage dancers]] in his stadium, stretched out his face to look like a villain in a Creator/TerryGilliam movie, tampered with Adrian Peterson, [[DirtyOldMan rubbed his crotch on people]], employed BOTH Roy Williamses, and in general has done everything possible to run the Cowboys into the ground... In every Cowboys season, there is at least one moment in which the Double J dismantles the authority of his coaching staff in plain view of millions, and everything falls apart shortly thereafter.



->{{Remember the Alamo}} (the movie I mean)? No? Yeah, I almost didn’t either. The movie started with potential. Originally, the movie was supposed to be directed by RonHoward, produced by Brian Grazer, and starring RussellCrowe, Ethan Hawke, and Billy Bob Thorton. The deal fell through when Howard asked for an unbelievable $200 million to make the movie. {{Disney}} said 'Hell no!' and everybody but Thorton walked. Disney then hired John Lee Hancock. Who is John Lee Hancock? No one, that’s who. I had to check Website/{{IMDb}} to see what (if anything) the guy had done. His only big movie is ''Film/TheRookie''. Well, now that I know that, he’s the perfect person to direct our $100 million dollar historical epic.

to:

->{{Remember the Alamo}} (the movie I mean)? No? Yeah, I almost didn’t either. The movie started with potential. Originally, the movie was supposed to be directed by RonHoward, produced by Brian Grazer, and starring RussellCrowe, Ethan Hawke, and Billy Bob Thorton. The deal fell through when Howard asked for an unbelievable $200 million to make the movie. {{Disney}} said 'Hell no!' and everybody but Thorton walked. Disney then hired John Lee Hancock. Who ->Who is John Lee Hancock? No one, that’s who. I had to check Website/{{IMDb}} to see what (if anything) the guy had done. His only big movie is ''Film/TheRookie''. Well, now that I know that, he’s the perfect person to direct our $100 million dollar historical epic.



->They might be hacks, but they’re not pandering hacks. They’re not talking down to us. The scripts they write are about as intelligent as they are. In fact, most of their work seems to be the result of a couple of not-very-bright guys trying their hardest to write really smart movies.
-->--'''''Website/TheAgonyBooth''''', [[http://www.agonybooth.com/agonizer/Kurtzman_Orci_Directing_Star_Trek_3_Venom.aspx "Kurtzman and Orci to direct (and ruin) Venom, Star Trek 3"]]

->The wallet-immolating failure of ''Film/HowardTheDuck'' may come as less of a surprise to us now, in the year 2014, because [[Creator/GeorgeLucas (George) Lucas]] famously has the self-awareness of reheated spaghetti. But back in the golden [[TheEighties 1980s]], ''Howard the Duck''[='s=] cataclysmic release was the first terrifying sign that the Bearded One might not actually have any idea what the fuck he is doing.
-->--'''''{{Website/Cracked}}''''', [[http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-bad-movies-that-were-hilariously-sure-sequel_p2/ "4 Bad Movies That Were Hilariously Sure of a Sequel"]]



->Correctly investigated for being [[OrwellianEditor unfit for transmission.]] There’s a school of thought that says this could have worked with better effects, but there’s a school of thought that thinks climate change isn’t real too, so really, who cares about that? Absolutely nothing about this story comes even remotely close to working. A misconceived disaster, and yet another example of Creator/JohnNathanTurner having no sense that maybe you should avoid putting a complete piece of crap out as a season premiere (See also the premieres of Seasons [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS18E1TheLeisureHive}} 18]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS20E1ArcOfInfinity}} 20]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS22E1AttackOfTheCybermen}} 22]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS24E1TimeAndTheRani}} 24]], and [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS26E1Battlefield}} 26]].) All that can be said is that at least with Season 21 he avoids putting the worst story out as a season premiere. Instead he saves the worst story for an [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E7TheTwinDilemma}} even more important slot]]. Oh, dear.

to:

->Correctly investigated for being [[OrwellianEditor unfit for transmission.]] There’s a school of thought that says this could have worked with better effects, but there’s a school of thought that thinks climate change isn’t real too, so really, who cares about that? Absolutely nothing about this story comes even remotely close to working. A ->A misconceived disaster, and yet another example of Creator/JohnNathanTurner having no sense that maybe you should avoid putting a complete piece of crap out as a season premiere (See also the premieres of Seasons [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS18E1TheLeisureHive}} 18]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS20E1ArcOfInfinity}} 20]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS22E1AttackOfTheCybermen}} 22]], [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS24E1TimeAndTheRani}} 24]], and [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS26E1Battlefield}} 26]].) All that can be said is that at least with Season 21 he avoids putting the worst story out as a season premiere. Instead he saves the worst story for an [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS21E7TheTwinDilemma}} even more important slot]]. Oh, dear.

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