History Main / MiseryBuildsCharacter

* ''Literature/TheBible'': The Apostle Paul discusses this in the Literature/BookOfRomans [[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans%205:3-5&version=ESV5: 3-5]], where he notes that suffering builds endurance, endurance builds character, and character builds hope. Considering the time period, he and many of the other Christians who were physically tortured and martyred for their faith knew what they were talking about from many experiences they could count by the lashes on their backs. In fact, the next five books (Hebrews, Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians, and Philemon) were all written by Paul while he was imprisoned in Rome under [[OffWithHisHead being beheaded]] under Emperor Nero (who used Christians as TheScapegoat to blame for the Great Fire which burned down much of Rome).

* ''ComicBook/{{Maus}}'': This concept is deconstructed throughout Creator/ArtSpiegelman's comic. Spiegelman's father Vladek states several times that although his time in the concentration camps was horrific beyond measure, he learned several skills that would serve him well later in his life. [[AuthorAvatar Art]] however begs to differ, as his father's experiences also made him a super-paranoid hypochondriac miser who's very needy and passive-aggressive to his young son, whom he can't relate to in the end. Vladek was also unable to shake his own prejudices, being something of a racist himself towards black people. Moreover, his wife/Art's mother, several years after the war, [[DrivenToSuicide committed suicide]] due to [[DespairEventHorizon the sheer pain of her experiences]]. In short, surviving severe trauma does not necessarily make a person better or stronger; it just makes them traumatized.

* ''ComicBook/{{Irredeemable}}'': Played for drama. When he was a child, the ComicBook/{{Superman}} {{Expy}}'s foster father teaches him to '''always''' be selfless and reject any selfishness because he has powers. This gets taken to an extreme when his father makes him give away all of his Christmas presents to other children because they're underprivileged.

* ''ComicBook/{{Maus}}'': Over the course of Creator/ArtSpiegelman's comic, Spiegelman's father Vladek states several times that, although his time in the concentration camps was horrific beyond measure, he learned several skills that would serve him well later in his life. The book subjects this trope to severe {{Deconstruction}} in that surviving severe oppression does not necessarily make a person better or worse. Vladek after the war becomes a thrifty, miserly parent to his young son who he can't relate to in the end. He's also unable to shake the prejudices, even being something of a racist himself to African-Americans, and overall his experience has made him a super-paranoid hypochondriac miser who's very needy and passive-aggressive. Likewise, his wife couldn't get over it herself and several years after the war, she committed suicide.

* ''Fanfic/ChildOfTheStorm'' makes it appear as if master manipulator Doctor Strange believes this, but the truth is a bit closer to 'adversity builds character, not misery, and so do positive experiences and social bonds'. In other words, he's more than willing to only give the heroes minimal advice to guide them through what's coming, and to let them endure some pretty serious things, but he also makes sure to balance it out with arranging close-knit groups of family and friends, therapy for those who need it, and plenty of positive experiences, too.

* Played with in ''Fanfic/TheBoyWhoDiedALot'', Snape's constant misery in having to prevent Harry's death and later heartbreak slowly has him develop a sense of empathy and sympathy for others. Subverted with Harry, as the TraumaCongaLine in Cedric's death, his alienation, and Umbridge's torture drive him to successfully commit suicide.
* [[EnforcedTrope Enforced]] by Sabrina in her side-story of ''Fanfic/PokemonResetBloodlines''. Disgusted by her hometown's lazy attitude, she decides that if the promise of achieving something great won't spur them to work harder, she will make them act on fear of losing what they have, and thus she begins to use her powers to terrorize them until someone stands up to her.
* Discussed in ''Fanfic/ThePowerOfSeven'' as Voldemort muses that the pampered nature of most pure-bloods means that they don't actually have the same raw potential he feels true wizards should possess, with only Snape, Bellatrix and Harry (from Voldemort's perspective) having mastered the power that comes from pain.
* In the ''Franchise/{{Kirby}}'' fanfiction ''Avalanche Stories: Bronto Burt's Story'', Bronto Burt moved on and wins the Avalanche competition pretty much to Kirby despite Burt losing to the pink puffball and "came back strong".

* ''Fanfic/AKnightsTaleAsInquisitor'' takes place after ''Literature/FateZero'' for Arturia, where [[BreakTheCutie she experienced]] [[TraumaCongaLine a series of horrendous events on all fronts]]. Now, Arturia [[TookALevelInKindness has become a more openly friendly person]] to the people around her, making a conscious effort to avoid her [[ToughLeaderFacade previous behavior]] towards those on her side.
* In ''Fanfic/TheDesertStorm'', Mandalore has a philosophy that can be summed up as this trope. During the Clone Wars, Ben eventually came to understand this:
-->As flowers are grown by rain, so is the soul grown by war. From suffering comes compassion; from cruelty, mercy; from violence, peace. We are not born when we come into this world. We are born when we learn who we are, and we can only learn by being tested. Adversity is the crucible, honor is the way, and enlightenment the reward.
* ''Fanfic/TheUntoldTale'' has Shen Yuan explaining some misery is needed in order to create a protagonist able to question society's unfairness and bring justice instead of growing complacent. Deconstructed since Luo Binghe -- said protagonist -- is rightfully ''furious'' about being made to suffer merely because someone wanted to mold him into a great ruler.

* Discussed in ''Fanfic/CatRa''. When explaining the reason for her incredibly harsh treatment of Catra to Glimmer, Shadow Weaver explains that her ward [[TooMuchAlike reminds her too much of herself]], and since she has become to view the adoration that she received prior to her FaceHeelTurn as something that made her complacent and thus limited her own potential, she reasoned that making sure Catra worked herself to death trying to receive even the small scrap of affection would be the best way to nurture her abilities. Glimmer concedes that tough love can be beneficial, but calls her out for crossing the line into being an [[AbusiveParents abusive parent]] that turned Catra into an emotional wreck. The witch shrugs off the notion she did anything wrong in raising the magicat, however.

* Believed by Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, who at the age of 12 wanted to become an ascetic and chose Stoic philosophy. He is known as one of the best emperors of the Roman Empire. It ''horribly'' backfired on his son Commodus, who was raised in a similar way. He became a weak-minded and cruel sybarite, who enjoyed luxuries and extravaganza and admired physical prowess and pleasures.

* ''Literature/TheBible'': The Apostle Paul discusses this in the Literature/BookOfRomans [[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans%205:3-5&version=ESV5: 3-5]], where he notes that suffering builds endurance, endurance builds character, and character builds hope. Considering the time period, he and many of the other Christians who were physically tortured and martyred for their faith knew what they were talking about from many experiences they could count by the lashes on their backs. In fact, the next five books (Hebrews, Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians, and Philemon) were all written by Paul while he was imprisoned in Rome.

-->'''Martin:''' I was locked in the cupboard under the stairs as a child, and it never did me any harm.
* ''Series/DowntonAbbey'': Cora tries to use this approach to comfort Edith [[spoiler:after she's jilted at the altar by Sir Anthony.]]

* ''Series/TheGeorgeLopezShow'': {{Zigzagged|Trope}}.

-->'''George:''' ''[to Benny]'' I'm anything but a wuss. If you weren't so tough on me, I'd be the type of person who just sat back and let somebody destroy my clubs. Instead, I'm the type of person who breaks into their car and takes this. ''[pulls Benny's steering wheel out of a bag, smiling the entire time]''

* ''Series/MightyMorphinPowerRangers'': A positive example is shown with black ranger Zack Taylor. He tries to impress his crush Angela with lunch at a fancy restaurant and pearl earrings on her birthday, but due to a number of circumstances beyond his control, the whole thing crashes and burns. He later realizes that trying to impress someone with money is not the way to win them over. Angela herself - who up to this point had been fairly snobbish and materialistic - also realizes that she hadn’t treated Zack particularly well, and softens when he gives her a bouquet of flowers.

** ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration'': Subverted in the episode "New Ground," when Worf tells his son Alexander that the rigors of Klingon schools are meant to build character -- but that their staying together will be an even greater challenge.
** ''Series/StarTrekDeepSpaceNine'': In "Indiscretion", Gul Dukat attempts to invoke this with an entire planet (this is a frequent attitude of his, due to his inability to acknowledge that he or his people did anything wrong). Kira is having none of it.
--->'''Dukat''': I know you find this to accept, but I believe that in some ways the Occupation actually helped Bajor.\\
'''Kira''': Which part? The massacres or the strip mining?\\
'''Dukat''': I have no desire to debate the merits of the Occupation with you. I'm even willing to admit that perhaps we were a little harsh in our methods. But the fact is, the Bajoran people are stronger now than they have been in centuries. When we arrived, you were a weak, contemplative race, choking on your isolation. And now you have a new confidence, a whole new sense of purpose, not to mention a key role in the future of this entire quadrant.\\
'''Kira''': All of which Bajor achieved in ''spite'' of the Cardassians, not ''because'' of them.
** ''Series/StarTrekVoyager'': A more tragic version occurs in "Real Life". The Doctor has created a hologram family to experience a new aspect of humanity. During the course of the episode, his daughter suffers a mortal wound in an accident and is dying, so the Doctor suspends the program. Paris points out to him that normal humans don't get to evade the negative aspects of life and persuades the Doctor to see the program to completion and say goodbye to his daughter.
** ''Series/StarTrekPicard'': In "Broken Pieces", Oh invokes the "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" variation when she addresses the Zhat Vash initiates.
--->'''Oh''': What you are about to experience will drive some of you mad, but those of you who endure will be stronger.

* ''Series/TheTwilightZone1985'': In "Cat and Mouse", Andrea Moffatt's experience of being mistreated and used by Guillaume de Marchaux teaches her not to be weak and submissive anymore. She also realizes that the kind of TrueLove found in [[RomanceNovel romance novels]] does not exist in the real world and finally agrees to go out with her co-worker Carl so that she can have a chance at real happiness.
* ''Series/{{Westworld}}'': Trauma often causes [[ArtificialHuman Hosts]] to deviate from programming in unintended ways, bringing them closer to self-awareness. They even wish to keep painful memories because they're all they have left. [[spoiler:[[TheChessmaster Ford]] comes to the conclusion that in order for the hosts to attain true consciousness, they had to have suffered enough first. Not so much because misery builds character, but because if the hosts were happy they would never have the incentive to change their circumstances.]]

[[folder:Web Original]]
* WebVideo/CriticalRole: A recurring theme in the second campaign and the backstories of the Mighty Nein: the negative figures in their pasts try to justify the miseries they inflicted with this defense, and take credit for their success.

* ''WesternAnimation/AdventureTime'': Downplayed and inverted (focusing on the ''lack'' of misery) in the episode "Puhoy." Finn finds a portal to a 'verse made entirely of pillows. Everything comes easily there to him; monsters are easy, the GirlOfTheWeek easily falls in love with him. Nothing is a challenge. After an entire ''lifetime'' there, Finn returns to his own world and, when Jake asks [[YearInsideHourOutside what happened]], says "Eh." Even if it was AllJustADream, the fact that it was all soft and comfortable made it not even worth remembering. (That episode also shows a little bump in Finn and Flame Princess' relationship, which is invigorating ''because'' it's not always easy).

** ''[[Recap/AmericanDadS2E16TearsofaClooney Tears of a Clooney]]'': Lampshaded and inverted when Roger recruits a group of young orphans to work on the impromptu vineyard he’s set up. One of his first statements to them is that hard work builds character, but the children essentially function as an unpaid and abused labor force (i.e. slavery) until Child Protective Services rescues them.

** This basically became Zuko's personal life philosophy.
--->'''Zuko:''' I don't need luck though, I don't want it. I've always had to struggle and fight and that's made me strong. It's made me who I am.
** He's just trying to please his ManipulativeBastard father, who ''claims'' this is the case, but his philosophy is actually MightMakesRight. His son doesn't agree? Teach him a permanent lesson... On his ''face.''
--->'''Ozai:''' You will learn respect, and '''suffering''' will be your teacher.
** It takes Zuko ''three years'' to realize that Ozai using this trope to justify his cruelty is ''bullshit'' and [[CallingTheOldManOut Call The Old Man Out]] and tell him to ShutUpHannibal With a NoMoreHoldingBackSpeech.

** In a more unusual example, Avatar Yangchen tells Aang that the reason the Avatar is born human, and thus capable of making mistakes, and not an immortal spirit on a mountain somewhere is so they can relate to and show compassion towards the people of the world by experiencing not only sadness and anger but joy and happiness as well. [[spoiler:Considering Raava's disdain towards humanity before getting to see Wan's noble side and eventually fusing with him, she's got a point]].
*** ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'' [[spoiler:Korra makes a similar statement to Tenzin after she managed to [[TalkingTheMonsterToDeath talk Kuvira down]], saying that her suffering made her more compassionate]].

* {{Invoked|Trope}} by the often WrongGenreSavvy Cockroach in ''ComicBook/CerebusTheAardvark'':

* ''Franchise/TheFlash'': This was the rationale of the villain Zoom (Hunter Zolomon), who attempted to murder Wally West's wife, believing that West needed to suffer personal tragedy in order to become a better hero. He does not realize how [[InsaneTrollLogic fundamentally screwed up]] this logic truly is, making him also an example of TheMentallyDisturbed by virtue of invoking this trope. Wally himself rejects this line of thinking and stated that what Hunter never understood was that being the Flash was ''never'' about tragedy, but about always moving forward. Zoom also has subjected this horror to other heroes, such as [[ComicBook/JusticeLeagueOfAmerica turning Damage's]] face [[FacialHorror into something he needs to conceal behind a mask 24/7]] via super-speed road rash. The character-building only comes [[IfYouKillHimYouWillBeJustLikeHim after Liberty Belle begs him to not kill Zoom in revenge]] - and Zoom still tries to take the credit.
* Cited by Star-Lord of ''ComicBook/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy''.

* Played for drama in ''ComicBook/{{Irredeemable}}''. When he was a child, the ComicBook/{{Superman}} {{Expy}}'s foster father teaches him to '''always''' be selfless and reject any selfishness because he has powers. This gets taken to an extreme when his father makes him give away all of his Christmas presents to other children because they're underprivileged.
* Zigzagged by Scrooge [=McDuck=] in Don Rosa's ''ComicBook/TheLifeAndTimesOfScroogeMcDuck''. While the suffering and hard work that he went through to create his fortune gave him the drive, strength, and guts to become the richest duck in the world, it also turned him into a crabby, greedy, miserable old miser who eventually drove his last remaining family away. While he does eventually reconcile with his nephew and grandnephews more than a ''decade'' later (after spending quite a bit of time waiting to die in a crumbling mansion), he never fully loses his greed, and other works from Rosa show him as being secretly deeply envious of Donald's family.
* Over the course of Creator/ArtSpiegelman's ''ComicBook/{{Maus}}'', Spiegelman's father Vladek states several times that, although his time in the concentration camps was horrific beyond measure, he learned several skills that would serve him well later in his life. The book subjects this trope to severe {{Deconstruction}} in that surviving severe oppression does not necessarily make a person better or worse. Vladek after the war becomes a thrifty, miserly parent to his young son who he can't relate to in the end. He's also unable to shake the prejudices, even being something of a racist himself to African-Americans, and overall his experience has made him a super-paranoid hypochondriac miser who's very needy and passive-aggressive. Likewise, his wife couldn't get over it herself and several years after the war, she committed suicide.
* At the end of [[Creator/TomKing Tom King's]] ''ComicBook/MisterMiracle2017'' run, [[spoiler:Mister Miracle chooses to stay inside the LotusEaterMachine he's trapped in to defy a DreamApocalypse and be happy. Orion is understanding of his decision but also says that it's a mistake because mortal life is meaningless and unfulfilling without struggle, challenge, and the possibility of failure, the things that [[EarnYourHappyEnding make it all worth it in the end]]. He essentially argues that any happiness Scott may find in a "perfect world" handed to him on a platter is hollow and false.]]
* Used ''very'' darkly in ''ComicBook/VForVendetta'', in which one of V's biggest WhatTheHellHero moments comes from his ColdBloodedTorture of his protege Evey so that she can undergo the same spiritual transformation he did. It works, but not before she nearly loses her mind.

** ''Film/{{Deadpool|2016}}'': Negasonic Teenage Warhead asks her mentor Colossus what the perks of being with the Franchise/XMen are, considering [[DoomMagnet the mansion gets completely destroyed every couple of years]]. Colossus then cheerfully responds "House blowing up builds character."

--->'''Calvin''': All by charagder id drippig out by node!

* ''WesternAnimation/BoJackHorseman'': Turns the ''lack'' of this into a HardTruthAesop -- Diane's childhood abuse was not "good damage" that transformed her as a person. It was just damage inflicted upon her by those who should have loved and supported her, and trying to convert it into "good" damage instead of putting it behind her was doing even more harm.

** On the other hand, this "greatness" has exerted a horrible toll on Russians: Russia has a smaller economy than some U.S. states, it has endured bloody wars and repression, much of its industrial base is weak and non-competitive, the country is run by corrupt elites who control much of the wealth, and its demographic structure is broken, [[UsefulNotes/TheRussianCross with death rates being higher than birth rates]]. The Russian army is notorious for a tradition of hazing, dedovshchina, that is so brutal it has driven hundreds of recruits to suicide, and despite the image of strength, Russia's military record has been pretty subpar for a nation of its size, with staggering defeats in conflicts like the Russo-Japanese War and World War I.

"Misery Builds Character" is a StockAesop and StockPhrase implying that unpleasant, distasteful activities and events are supposedly good. The suffering that the subject goes through is believed to [[CharacterDevelopment help their personal and spiritual development]], though often in a vague, unspecified manner (not always clear what "character" is supposed to be or represent). Synonymous with "A little suffering is good for the soul," or as Music/KellyClarkson puts it, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" -- which in turn was based on a tenet of Creator/FriedrichNietzsche's philosophy. When done right, this trope proves that someone can grow and mature once they've had their share of humble pie or have suffered enough to move themselves in a more positive direction. If done wrong, the trope can imply that one can only become a better person through suffering, rather than building character on good deeds.

This message is often delivered by a parent (or ParentalSubstitute) to a BrattyHalfPint as part of some instructions or admonitions. If the addressee is a MouthyKid or LittleMissSnarker, a sarcastic response is all but inevitable, especially if the parent is only doing it to be patronizing. The parent may claim that they used to face the same or worse kinds of tribulations and came out of it "developed", as well as [[FreudianExcuseDenial deny that it affected them negatively.]]

* Unhappy with the way his shy, sensitive son was turning out, Emperor Franz Joseph I of Austria deliberately invoked this, assigning a DrillSergeantNasty-type to 'toughen the boy up'. Considering it might've led to the [[SuicidePact Mayerling incident]], this may have ended up [[SuccessionCrisis backfiring]] [[UsefulNotes/FranzFerdinandOfAustria rather]] [[UsefulNotes/WorldWarI spectacularly]].

** ''Tears of a Clooney'': Lampshaded and inverted when Roger recruits a group of young orphans to work on the impromptu vineyard he’s set up. One of his first statements to them is that hard work builds character, but the children essentially function as an unpaid and abused labor force (i.e. slavery) until Child Protective Services rescues them.

* ''Literature/TheBible'': The Apostle Paul discusses this in the Literature/BookOfRomans [[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans%205:3-5&version=ESV5: 3-5]], where he notes that suffering builds endurance, endurance builds character, and character builds hope. Considering the time period, he and many of the other Christians who were physically tortured and martyred for their faith knew what they were talking about from many experiences they could count by the lashes on their backs.

* Unhappy with the way his shy, sensitive son was turning out, Emperor Franz Joseph I of Austria deliberately invoked this, assigning a DrillSergeantNasty-type to 'toughen the boy up'. Considering it might've led to the [[SuicidePact Mayerling incident]], this may have ended up [[UsefulNotes/FranzFerdinandOfAustria backfiring]] rather [[UsefulNotes/WorldWarI spectacularly]].

* Unhappy with the way his shy, sensitive son was turning out, Emperor Franz Joseph I of Austria deliberately invoked this, assigning a DrillSergeantNasty-type to 'toughen the boy up'. Considering it might've led to the [[SuicidePact Mayerling incident]], this may have ended up backfiring rather spectacularly.

* Zig-zagged and/or deconstructed in ''Manga/BirdyTheMighty: Decode''. Birdy was raised and trained by people who seemed to have this mindset, [[spoiler:having undergone TrainingFromHell since she was no older than ten in order to become a Federation officer]]. In the first season, the villain, Shyamalan, attempts to cause a version of this on a ''global'' scale, by unleashing a superweapon that will kill all but those he considers most worthy. The second season, [[spoiler:in the aftermath of the ensuing disaster, shows that the survivors were able to bond over having lived through something so terrible]]. However, by the same token, Birdy did not have as tough a life as the second season's villain, [[spoiler Nataru, who is now a mentally-unstable murderer after having lived through the aforementioned disaster]], and Shyamalan himself [[spoiler:is implied to be wracked with SurvivorGuilt as the result of being a victim of a terrorist attack years ago]], which serves as the basis for his worldview today. The overarching implication seems to be that misery is just as likely to make you worse off as better off, if not more likely. Given that the director of ''Decode'' also directed the below-mentioned ''Anime/HeatGuyJ'', it's no surprise that its views on the subject are similar.

* The world of ''Manga/GoodLuckGirl'' runs on this logic. Misfortune Gods are necessary for the world to function not because the gods like seeing people suffer or be inconvenienced--they cause bad events because they're meant to serve as a check for humans who would otherwise grow complacent and spoiled if good luck was all they knew. Protagonist Ichiko was one such person; while she has a lot of problems on her own (such as her growing up with her parents always working and being betrayed by people she thought were friends), she starts off the story as a SpoiledBrat who coasts off of her good luck. She only starts developing as a person when hardship pops up and she's forced to spread her good luck around to people who need it. Her love interest Tsuwabuki was hit hard with negligent parents and poverty but became one of the most disciplined characters in the series for it. [[spoiler:The overall villain of the manga, Ikari, begs to differ--he was born with ''immeasurable'' bad luck, and only started to open up to others after Kanna blesses him with her good luck just by being near her. Kanna's death by her fortune energy draining her life, combined with his terrible life beforehand, makes Ikari go ballistic and declare war on humanity (for needing fortune/misfortune) and the current gods that enable their neediness.]]

* ''Manga/ASilentVoice'': Brutaly deconstructed. Shouko's mother believed this and tried to encourage Shouko to stand up for herself and fight her own battles. It didn't work; Shouko prefers to Turn the Other Cheek and internalize the hatred directed towards her. Yuzuru as a result judges her mother for being strict and unsympathetic, even when Ms. Nishimiya does better. Meanwhile, after being used as TheScapegoat, while Shouya has become a better person since his elementary school days, he's also battling suicidal thoughts and doesn't believe in trying to live.
* ''Manga/WelcomeToDemonSchoolIrumaKun'': The titular Iruma, before his being sold to the demon Sullivan by his parents, this is the core of his being. In his youth, he suffers from abusive, neglectful, dangerous parents who would use him in any means to gain money and power. He is forced to work with horrible bosses to get money (and one time is even shot at while running away). All of this teaches Iruma one key fact in life: Despair won't do a damn thing. If he wallows in despair at his misfortune, he would starve in the wilderness. Because of all of these horrific experiences, he refuses to give into despair and fight to survive. When he is confronted with the depths of his Mirror Character's heinous plans, rather than break down at the sight of a close friend being so evil, Iruma gets off the floor, dusts himself off, and keeps fighting.

* ''Fanfic/ChildOfTheStorm'' makes it appear as if master manipulator Doctor Strange believes this, but the truth is a bit closer to 'adversity builds character, not misery, and so do positive experiences and social bonds'. In other words, he's more than willing to only given the heroes minimal advice to guide them through what's coming, and to let them endure some pretty serious things, but he also makes sure to balance it out with arranging close-knit groups of family and friends, therapy for those who need it, and plenty of positive experiences, too.

* Played with in ''Fanfic/TheBoyWhoDiedALot'', Snape's constant misery in having to prevent Harry's death and later heartbreak slowly has him develop a sense of empathy and sympathy for others. Subverted with Harry, as the TraumaCongaLine in Cedric's death, his alienation and Umbridge's torture drive him to successfully commit suicide.

'''Izuku:''' But... all of that made me the person I am today. If I didn't go through these hardships who knows how I would turn out. Sure, I loved Toshinori Yagi before and after finding out my "Brokenness", but would I have really cared for the hardships of other people? Or perhaps I would have just wanted to be cool like him, who knows? ''[clenches his fist]'' It's strange how people can perceive others differently over slight differences, maybe even not so noticeable ones, and then go on to lord it over them. Like they're above such "weird" people. While my dream is to protect people, it's also my dream to change and inspire people to new paths of thinking about their surroundings. Sort of similar to your dream of changing people's minds for the better, isn't it?\\

* {{Discussed}} and {{deconstruced}} in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7042941/5/Naruto-Rend Naruto: Rend]]''. Kakashi and Minato are having a quiet conversation about Naruto, 7 years after his death, with Minato saying that he can't help but feel he kept making the wrong decisions when it came to Naruto and wonders if burdening him with so much responsibility resulted in his death. Kakashi somberly replies that their attempts to spin Naruto's [[AllTheOtherReindeer childhood and subsequent struggles]], as this trope are just them trying to ease their own guilt.

* PlayedForLaughs in ''WesternAnimation/TheSuperMarioBrosMovie''. During the scene they're playing the piano together, Kamek tries to assure Bowser that Mario's not handsome enough to threaten the Koopa King's plans to marry Peach. [[TranquilFury Bowser quietly and calmly]] [[BlatantLies insists he doesn't feel threatened by Mario]], before he vents his jealousy towards Mario by [[PianoCoverSlam slamming the piano lid on Kamek's hands]]. This exchange then ensues:

* This is a focal point of ''WesternAnimation/SpiderManAcrossTheSpiderVerse'' in regards to how Spideys are always destined to [[ILetGwenStacyDie have people around them die]] for the sake of emotionally traumatizing them and thus strengthening their resolve. In-universe, such moments are considered "Canon Events" that must happen or else [[RealityBreakingParadox said universe will begin to unravel]] and thus enforced by the [[AllianceOfAlternates Spider-Society]] despite the fact that this should also goes against the typical moral code of Spideys. When Miles learns that [[spoiler:his father's own death is deemed a Canon Event]] he chooses to defy fate, thus bringing him into conflict with the Spider-Society.

** ''Film/{{Deadpool|2016}}'': Negasonic Teenage Warhead asks her mentor Colossus what the perks of being with the Franchise/XMen are, considering [[DoomMagnet the mansion gets completely destroyed every couple of years]]. Colossus then cheerfully responds that "House blowing up builds character."

** Most notably implied with Harry himself: Growing up with his abusive Aunt, Uncle and Cousin gave Harry a lot more humility and compassion than his father had at the same age (although his father grew out his JerkJock phase eventually). However, the real reason Harry is a HumbleHero is that the love and sacrifice of his GoodParents never left him. As Dumbledore repeatedly clarifies, Harry is exceptional for being so kind and caring despite growing up the way he did and calls out the Dursleys for the poor treatment they gave him.

** There are several instances where misery does not build character. The young Tom Riddle had a bad childhood, growing up without parents, but he didn't become a HeartwarmingOrphan, he became TheSociopath. Severus Snape barely managed to escape this, but even then he became a Dark wizard who struck out at the one person who was very nice to him and even after his HeelFaceTurn, [[GoodIsNotNice remains a difficult, unpleasant person haunted by his past]]. The theme of the books is choice, and even in exceptionally difficult situations, people have to make a choice to determine their character.

* ''Literature/MasterOfFormalities'': The people of planet Cappozzi have this as the central tent of their culture. They deliberately put themselves in situations that, in their belief, will better them through suffering. One way is a BlazingInfernoHellfireSauce called "chowklud", which is a staple of their cuisine. Food is normally prepared in such a way as to keep it bland and textureless, so that the chowklud, which they liberally pour all over the meal, is even more distinctive. When visiting planet Apios, the Cappozzian ruler Lord Kank requests that Lady Jakabitus invite the young Henneck Hahn to the reception, so that he can better himself by enduring Henneck's insults. [[spoiler:Although Henneck proves to be too much even for Kank, who expresses regret that Henneck is too young to be formally challenged to a DuelToTheDeath.]]

* ''Literature/{{Pact}}'': Blake Thorburn plays with this trope. While he occasionally cites his DarkAndTroubledPast of time spent on the streets, which he claims have given him keen instincts, he also mentions that he loathes the saying "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." While his instincts may be keener, they're counterbalanced by his severe PTSD, and he himself feels that he's been made weaker, often referring to himself as "not much of a man."

* ''Literature/QuantumGravity'': Devils plant themselves on a victim and whisper these kind of thoughts, keeping the victim in {{Hell}}[[note]]read as "separation from God"[[/note]]. Demons get...touchy if you confuse demons and devils, as demons believe the exact opposite. Have fun at everything you do, be it painting, singing, fighting, killing, decorating, what have you. A demon with a devil on it isn't even considered a demon anymore, it's a[[spoiler:n imp.]]

* ''Series/RedDwarf'': [[TheAce Ace Rimmer]] is this all over. He is different from normal Rimmer because their shared timeline split off when they were children. One of them got [[HeldBackInSchool held back a year in school]], the other didn't. It turns out it's actually Ace that was held back a year, and so he suffered for it (ie by being bullied and suffering the humiliation of it all), and decided to fight back, and continued to fight back ever since, building his character and becoming awesome. Normal Rimmer, on the other hand, was never held back a year, and therefore spent the rest of his life making excuses for himself.

** ''Series/StarTrekDeepSpaceNine'': in "Indiscretion", Gul Dukat attempts to invoke this with an entire planet (this is a frequent attitude of his, due to his inability to acknowledge that he or his people did anything wrong). Kira is having none of it.

-->'''Oh''': What you are about to experience will drive some of you mad, but those of you who endure will be stronger.

--> ''Now son, this world is rough and if a man's going to make it, he's gotta be tough. And I knew I wouldn't be there to help you along. So I gave you that name and I said goodbye, and I knew you'd have to get tough or die. It's that name that helped to make you strong. Now you just fought one hell of a fight. Know you hate me. Got the right to kill me now, and I wouldn't blame you if you do. But thank me before I die, for the grabble in your gut and the spit in your eye, because I'm the son of a bitch who named you Sue.''

* ''Literature/TheBible'': The Apostle Paul discusses this in the Literature/BookOfRomans [[http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans%205:3-5&version=ESV5: 3-5]], where he notes that suffering builds endurance, endurance builds character, and character builds hope. Considering the time period, he and many of the other Christians that were physically tortured and martyred for their faith knew what they were talking about from many experiences they could count by the lashes on their backs.

* The entire Wrestling/{{New Japan|ProWrestling}} system is based on this, and while similarities exist some of their regional rivals(Wrestling/{{All Japan|ProWrestling}}, Wrestling/{{FMW}}, etc) it's NJPW that's most famous because the characteristic they're trying to build is ''[[DrivenByEnvy envy]]'', which their strong style is supposed to be a physical representation of. From the beginning "Young Boys" are forced to live in claustrophobic quarters when they aren't waiting on established wrestler hand and foot, having to do drills in thousands of repetitions if they mess anything up-if they're lucky and don't get stuck with one of the many {{sadist teacher|}}s who'll really make sure they suffer. Then they're allowed to wrestle as "Young Lions" but restricted to using only the most boring and or most obvious moves to ensure [[{{jobber}} they'll lose as often as possible to anyone who knows what they're doing]]. Then when the IWGP deems them masters of these "fundamentals" they're sent on "excursion", often to a foreign country, usually to some place where the wrestling style is different from what they're used to, to ensure whatever they've been thinking of but now allowed to do won't work and they'll lose even more until they learn to adapt. If nothing else, it's believed those who graduate from the "young lion" designation will appreciate any success they manage to achieve in New Japan, though it tends to produce ''a lot'' of {{arrogant kung fu guy|}}s who go on to become the aforementioned sadist teachers.

* In ''VideoGame/{{Bully}}'' the principal of Bullworth Academy thinks this, at one point Jimmy points out to him how the school is full of bullies, to which he cheerfully replies that "It builds character!".

* ''VideoGame/ElohimEternalTheBabelCode'': Judge Ham grew up in a poor family, and his father committed suicide after his mother and sister died of illness. He believes the Kosmokraters put him through tragedy in order to make him stronger, and he looks down on Joshwa for using his family connections to try to fast track his way into becoming a Judge.

* ''VideoGame/OctopathTraveler'': Heroine Priestess Ophelia Clement starts the story with her parents having been dead for many years. She suffered and grieved for them before her adoptive father and sister, Bishop Josef and Lianna respectively, helped her recover. Understanding the loss of those who she loved best and accepting it helps her be empathetic to others, and derails her ArcVillain's plot because [[spoiler:he has poisoned Josef on the eve of a sacred pilgrimage Lianna is to take. When Josepf falls ill, Ophelia takes Lianna's place so Lianna may be beside Josef. When Josepf succumbs to the slow poison, Lianna is devastated and is able to be tricked into following the villain's plan, while Ophelia, with the understanding of her own tragedy, is able to resist the temptation to try and raise Josef from the dead. She is able to help Lianna accept Josef's death and stops her from inadvertently killing many people in her unholy quest]].
* In ''VideoGame/OctopathTravelerII'', Partitio's hometown of Oresrush becomes utterly destitute over the course of his first chapter after the silver mine starts to slow down and the landowner repeatedly increases the taxes. This is largely why his goal is to end poverty across the world, because Partitio knows exactly how much suffering it causes. In fact, he ''explicitly thanks'' [[spoiler:Roque, the landowner]] for causing Oresrush's downfall in his final chapter, as otherwise he wouldn't have gotten this perspective!
* Viciously [[{{Deconstruction}} deconstructed]] in ''VideoGame/{{Omori}}''. [[spoiler: The death of Sunny’s sister, Mari (which Sunny [[AccidentalMurder accidentally caused]]), ultimately destroys the once stable lives of everyone around her. [[TheFellowshipHasEnded Her friend group dissolves]], her parents divorce, Basil becomes a barely functioning NervousWreck (since he helped Sunny cover up Mari’s death), Aubrey becomes a delinquent, Hero practically shut down from grief and only later became somewhat stable, and Sunny himself is so haunted by the guilt and grief that he retreats into [[MentalWorld HeadSpace]] where he is still continuously haunted by suicidal depression. Kel is pretty much the only one who was able to heal to some degree. The GoldenEnding has Sunny ultimately accept his sister’s death and confess the truth to his friends but this is less a strengthening of his character and more an opportunity to heal back to where he was before.]]

* ''VideoGame/WinterVoices'' has this in spades. By facing your hallucinations, past, and fears, you gain experience points that allow you to level up, increase your characteristics (Willpower, Humor, Memory, Perspicacity, Charisma, and Intuition) and gain new skills. [[BluntMetaphorsTrauma Was it made clear that the skill tree is a giant snowflake?]]

* ''WesternAnimation/BoJackHorseman'': Turns the ''lack'' of this into a HardTruthAesop -- Diane's childhood abuse was not "good damage" that transformed her as a person. It was just damage inflicted upon her by those that should have loved and supported her, and trying to convert it into "good" damage instead of putting it behind her was doing even more harm.
* ''WesternAnimation/DannyPhantom'': Early in the series, Valerie Gray was cruel, selfish, and mean-spirited like her popular friends. However, her descent into unpopularity as a result of her poverty has her turn her life around (though also by being a pawn in Vlad Masters' schemes), by becoming a ghost hunter (he gave her the equipment.) She ends up becoming a better person over time though it takes a bit of a while. Granted, Danny showing her compassion for her descent (likely because he had an impartial hand in it) also helped. It's also implied she made more of an effort when in the special "Reign Storm", Sam points out that Valerie was an AlphaBitch in the past and thus have little reason to trust her. Her shocked look implies that she actually listened. By the end of her growth, she has become more compassionate and her vigilantism more to help people out, even pursuing a relationship with Danny. She ends it however in order to better hunt ghosts and fear of him getting hurt (despite his family being the original ghost hunters.) She does end up becoming less harsh on ghosts, especially when she finally learns Vlad was using her against Danny.

** However, this trope is deconstructed: because Stan never showed Dipper much affection on top being so hard on him and only him, it only took one sentence out of context to convince Dipper that Stan hated him up until he overheard Stan talking to Soos in his memories about his rough experiences.

* Any sports fanbase that endures years of [[ButtMonkey finishing low on the rankings]] or [[EveryYearTheyFizzleOut getting close but no cigar to the title]] (sometimes, [[TheChewToy alternating on both]]). Some even get famed about being miserable ([[HopeSproutsEternal with moments of hope]] [[YankTheDogsChain that they know won't last]]), such as the Chicago Cubs, New York Jets, Toronto Maple Leafs, and any team from Cleveland, Buffalo and Kansas City. Or, across the pond, Liverpool FC, formerly the most successful team in English history and a European giant that last won the Premier League title in 1990. Having spent most of the 1990s and early 21st century yo-yo-ing from 'almost, but not quite' to 'embarrassingly low ranking' and back again, in a grand incident of YankTheDogsChain, they first racked up the third highest points tally in top division history... only to lose the title by one point to eventual champions Manchester City, who racked up the ''second'' highest points tally, then, in 2019-2020, when cruising to the Premier League with an unassailable 25 point lead, were suddenly stopped by the Covid-19 pandemic.

* UsefulNotes/{{Economics}} is literally defined as "the science of scarcity" -- since it is a given that no one has everything they could possibly need or want, economics is the science of making decisions to maximize the value of what they do have, and making the best use of resources that are limited and/or perishable. It's also why the discipline is also known as "the dismal science".

** On the other hand, this "greatness" has exerted a horrible toll on Russians: Russia has a smaller economy than some U.S. states, it has endured bloody wars and repression, much of its industrial base is weak and non-competitive, the country is run by corrupt elites who control much of the wealth, and its demographic structure is broken, [[UsefulNotes/TheRussianCross with death rates being higher than birth rates]]. The Russian army is notorious for a tradition of hazing, dedovshchina, that is so brutal is has driven hundreds of recruits to suicide, and despite the image of strength, Russia's military record has been pretty subpar for a nation of its size, with staggering defeats in conflicts like the Russo-Japanese War and World War I.

* ZigZagged and/or deconstructed in ''Anime/BirdyTheMighty: Decode''. Birdy was raised and trained by people who seemed to have this mindset, [[spoiler: having undergone TrainingFromHell since she was no older than ten in order to become a Federation officer]]. In the first season, the villain, Shyamalan, attempts to cause a version of this on a ''global'' scale, by unleashing a superweapon that will kill all but those he considers most worthy. The second season, [[spoiler: in the aftermath of the ensuing disaster, shows that the survivors were able to bond over having lived through something so terrible]]. However, by the same token, Birdy did not have as tough a life as the second season's villain, [[spoiler: Nataru, who is now a mentally-unstable murderer after having lived through the aforementioned disaster]], and Shyamalan himself [[spoiler: is implied to be wracked with SurvivorGuilt as the result of being a victim of a terrorist attack years ago]], which serves as the basis for his worldview today. The overarching implication seems to be that misery is just as likely to make you worse off as better off, if not more likely. Given that the director of ''Decode'' also directed the below-mentioned ''Anime/HeatGuyJ'', it's no surprise that its views on the subject are similar.

* PlayedForLaughs in ''WesternAnimation/TheSuperMarioBrosMovie''. During the scene they're playing the piano together, Kamek tries to assure Bowser that Mario's not handsome enough to threaten the koopa king's plans to marry Peach. [[TranquilFury Bowser quietly and calmly]] [[BlatantLies insists he doesn't feel threatened by Mario]], before he vents his jealousy towards Mario by [[PianoCoverSlam slamming the piano lid on Kamek's hands]]. This exchange then ensues: