History Main / ICantDance

* A popular story about Abraham Lincoln is that he met his future wife, Mary Todd, at a dance, and introduced himself with the line "Madame, I am about to give you the worst dance of your life."

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* In ''Anime/HisCooolSehaGirls'', [[UsefulNotes/SegaGenesis Mega Drive]] is daunted by the task of dancing in ''VideoGame/SpaceChannel5''.
* In ''Literature/LogHorizon'', Shiroe cannot dance. He still gets roped into a dance at a ball for diplomatic reasons, but fortunately his partner Henrietta knows how to dance and leads. Later, he and Akatsuki dance privately...but neither of them really know how to, and Akatsuki questions whether what they're doing really qualifies as "dancing".

* Happens in an ComicBook/ArchieComics story; Dilton doesn't know how to dance, so he builds a pair of shoes that dance for him, making him a sensation at the school dance. Then [[LightningCanDoAnything lightning strikes]], the shoes go whack, and things don't end well.
* ''ComicBook/{{Asterix}}'': In ''Recap/AsterixAndTheActress'', we learn Asterix is a terrible dancer. Unlike Obelix.
* ''ComicBook/StarWarsDarthVader''. Vader arrives on Shu-torun and a [[DancesAndBalls formal dance]] is performed in his honor. One of the aristocrats tries to [[TooDumbToLive provoke Vader by insisting he join the dance]]. Vader floats him up in the air using the Force, tosses him around a bit, then drops him.
-->'''Vader:''' Do any others wish to be my partner? ''(StunnedSilence)'' I thought not.

* [[VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition Cullen]]'s ability to dance - or lack thereof - is a minor RunningGag in ''Fanfic/SkyholdAcademyYearbook.''

* [[VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition Inquisitor]] [[VideoGame/DragonAgeII Bethany Hawke]] admits to Varric, in ''Fanfic/BeyondHeroes: Of Sunshine and Red Lyrium'', that she's uneasy about attending the Empress's masquerade ball because of this. She clarifies that Free Marches dancing isn't hard, but she doesn't know the appropriate step for an Orlesian soiree. Cue LessonsInSophistication for the remainder of the chapter.
* In ''Fanfic/ShipsAhoy'', before Square Dance Night starts, O'Donahue admits to Oprah that he has no idea how to square-dance. She assures him that he'll be fine and that there are agents who are probably worse than him at dancing, but it doesn't help -- what follows is an EpicFail montage of him running into everyone else, missing cues, and being so bad at calling out the moves involved with square dancing that he develops stage fright and runs off when Old Missie permits him to step down. The dance then changes into a waltz, but O'Donahue doesn't fare much better at it and becomes so embarrassed that he hides in a corner for the rest of the night.
* ''Fanfic/ShadowsOverMeridian'': In Chapter 23, though Tyrian doesn't say this, he's uncharacteristically nervous when Rosetta asks him to dance with her since he never thought any girl would do that. She advises him to relax, and he gets over his nervousness as he starts impressing her with his agile tricks and even ends up engaging in a dance duel with a Ninja Khan.

* In ''WesternAnimation/ThePrincessAndTheFrog'', Tiana says in an early scene that she "has no time for dancing", and later she reveals that she's never danced before. So Naveen quickly teaches her how... which is impressive, given that [[BewitchedAmphibians they're both frogs at the time]].

* In ''[[Film/AmericanPie American Wedding]]'', Jim admits he can't dance in preparation for his wedding. Stifler teaches him.
* ''Film/CaptainAmericaTheFirstAvenger''. It's even a plot point. Also what makes Steve so adorably dorky.

* ''Film/TheManFromUNCLE2015''. When Gaby Teller starts dancing in their hotel room, Illya Kuryakin refuses to play along, stating that it's both because he can't dance and [[TheStoic because he won't]]. Gaby then [[BelligerentSexualTension decides to wrestle him instead.]]

** In the season 1 episode "She", Angel is at a party Cordelia is hosting. He's trying to fit in, chatting with a girl, when she asks him if he wants to dance. [[ImagineSpot Cut to Angel flailing around wildly, a big grin on his face, while the girl looks on in horror]]. Cut back to a closeup of Angel as he deadpans, "I don't dance." You can see it [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCYlsFagq_k here]].
*** However, he proved quite adept at slow dancing in Sunnydale when on ''Buffy''.

* ''Series/{{Austin and Ally}}'': Ally is fully aware that she is a bad dancer, but she doesn't care that people don't like her dancing. She even makes a dancing video called "The Ally Way", which ironically becomes very popular.
* An episode of ''Series/{{Chuck}}'', where the eponymous character must learn to dance in order to get close to the Terrorist of the Week. It was even titled "Chuck Vs. The Tango".

** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS27E10TheDoctorDances "The Doctor Dances"]]: When Rose asks the Doctor to dance, she initially assumes he can't, and he's a bit irritated, but can't remember how to do it, probably because it's been a while. By the end of the episode, he remembers how to dance again.
** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS28E4TheGirlInTheFireplace "The Girl in the Fireplace"]]: When Reinette invites the Doctor to a ball, he's insistent that he can't go because she's supposed to dance with the king at that ball. She persuades him to come anyway.

** Chandler insists that he doesn't dance at weddings because he knows he's no good at it. He demonstrates with some [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UwM8km0ALbo incredibly awkward]] "dance moves" that involve shaking his hands and lifting his feet in an uncoordinated way. When he and Monica get married he tries to surprise her by taking dance lessons, but at the reception his shoes are so slippery he's forced to go back to his old moves.
** Joey's VeryFakeResume claims he has multiple years of drance training in ballet, tap and modern dance. When he actually has to dance the best he can do is bobbing his head and swinging his arms in a circle in front of him.

* ''Series/{{Good Luck Charlie}}'': Teddy is shown to be a terrible dancer in one episode involving a {{Talent Contest}}. She makes exploding moves and makes such bad movements that Spencer faked an injury to avoid entering the talent show with Emmett. She dances with Emmett instead and ends up injuring everyone onstage.
* ''Series/{{Haven}}'' has Nathan Wuornos. He has the excuse that he [[FeelNoPain can't feel his feet]]. He was able to slow dance with Audrey Parker because her AntiMagic allows him to feel her.
* Chef Gordon Ramsay stated this once after being invited to dance by a kid on an episode of ''Series/KitchenNightmares''.

* Also a RunningGag for a time in ''Series/MurdochMysteries''. Inspector Brackenereid gives Murdoch two tickets to a dance and when Murdoch is initially reluctant to take them, his boss makes a crack about dancing not being against Murdoch's religion. Murdoch takes lessons so he can escort Dr. Ogden, and she attends the same school to improve her own skills. Both of them need the help: Murdoch steps on her feet and has to remind her not to lead. In a later episode, when Higgins says Murdoch will waltz in and have the information for which the constables are wearily searching fingerprint cards, Crabtree retorts that Murdoch doesn't waltz: "Believe me, I've seen him try."
* In an episode of ''Series/{{Parenthood}}'' Max Braverman is attending a middle school dance to appease his mom Kristina but confesses he isn't sure how to dance, leading Kristina to show him how and them sharing a special moment. It is particularly special because Max has Asperger's, so he doesn't usually like to touch people, and his mom is cherishing a very rare moment.

* Subverted in the ''Series/{{Sharpe}}'' TV series. A lady at a ball asks Sharpe to dance.

* It's a RunningGag on ''Series/{{Smallville}}'' that Clark Kent can't dance. [[IronyAsSheIsCast In reality, his actor, Tom Welling, is quite talented.]]
* ''Series/{{Starman}}'': In "One for the Road", the alien title character, Paul (played by Creator/RobertHays), is a chaperone at a school dance. At first he refrains from dancing when invited by one of the teachers because he doesn't know how, but when dragged onto the dance floor he soon picks it up (as he tends to do with skills and languages). As he gets into it, he [[ActorAllusion briefly adopts]] the StayingAliveDancePose Hays famously parodied in ''Film/{{Airplane}}''.
* ''Series/StarTrekVoyager''
** The Doctor reveals "Lifesigns" that he literally cannot dance, because it's not in his program. He gets has dance at the end of the episode, having added the necessary subroutines.
** Also Seven of Nine, when she goes on her first date. He asks her for a dance, and she's insecure for a moment as she has never had dancing lessons. Then her competitive nature gets the better of her, she goes to the dance floor with her date... and winds up [[DoesntKnowHerOwnStrength accidentally breaking the poor guy's arm]].
* ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration''. Data asks Dr. Crusher to teach him to dance, but neglects to mention that it's for Keiko and O'Brien's wedding, so she starts off teaching him to tap dance (which he of course masters in 2 minutes). When Dr. Crusher starts teaching him a dance more suitable for the occasion, he has a much harder time of it at first because he's too close to her to see what her feet are doing (causing him to repeatedly step on them).
* In the second season finale of ''Series/StrangerThings'', after nearly a year's separation, Mike and Eleven finally get to go to the Snow Ball... only for both to admit that, since they're both 13-year olds (and Eleven spent the first 12 years of her life as a human experiment), neither of them know how to dance. Mike suggests they figure it out together.
* ''Series/Titans2018''. [[Series/DoomPatrol2019 Cliff Steele]] laments that no one would want to dance with him now he's in a robot body. Rachel says she would, and then proceeds to do the Robot.
--->'''Cliff:''' She can stay.
* In ''Series/Zoey101'' Chase is well aware that he is a terrible dancer. So when Zoey's partner for the PCA Dance Contest gets run over, he has Michael and Logan training him for two days straight. [[spoiler: We never get to see the result, as he oversleeps from exhaustion.]]

* The trope-naming Music/{{Genesis|Band}} song [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtjqxZMqMTA "I Can't Dance"]]. Bonus points for the fact that the name of the album from which it came was ''Music/WeCantDance''.

* "Your Mama Don't Dance" by Loggins & Messina.
* Music/MyChemicalRomance: "You can't swim, you can't dance, and you don't know karate. Face it, you're never gonna make it."
* Music/LLCoolJ's "You Can't Dance" is a hilarious TakeThat, making a good case that some people just shouldn't try.
* Music/KateMillerHeidke gave us ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lOvuGNtdZ8 Can't Shake It]]''.
-->Tried movin' my body to the latest hit\\
Someone called the nurse, thought I was havin' a fit\\
I execute the moonwalk like I stepped in [[PrecisionFStrike shit]], I can't take it
* Music/FrankZappa's send up of 70s pickup/disco culture "Dancing Fool"
-->''The beat goes on, and I'm so wrong...''

* Played with on "I Don't Dance" by Music/LeeBrice:

* The song "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JB5sJw_QERo I can't dance ]]" by Bonaparte.
-->I can read, I can write, I can shout, I can fight, I can kiss, I can bite, I can do it if I like, but everyone says I can't dance!
* Franck Crumit's [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOrmxab4rvg "Stumbling"]]
-->I can't dance, took a chance, And right then we started\\
Stumbling all around, stumbling all around, Stumbling all around, so funny\\
Stumbling here and there, stumbling everywhere, And I must declare\\
I stepped right on her toes, and when she bumped my nose, I fell, and when I rose, I felt ashamed!
* Music video clip variant: This is how group member Sara Dallin described the collective style of Music/{{Bananarama}} ("shonky," or amazingly uncoordinated).
* PlayedWith in Music/{{Shenandoah}}'s "If Bubba Can Dance (I Can Too)." Bubba learns to dance from an instructional video tape, and the singer, who was embarrassed to get on the dance floor because of this trope, figures if Bubba isn't afraid to try, he shouldn't be either.

[[folder:Mythology & Religion]]
* In ''Literature/TheAchilleid'', Achilles has to dance alongside the daughters of Lycomedes to keep up his disguise, but he resents having to do something girly so much that he fumbles into all the girls and ruins the dance.
[[/folder]]

* {{Subverted| trope}} on Monday Night Raw when United States Champion [[Wrestling/BryanDanielson Daniel Bryan]] finally gave in to Wrestling/EveTorres, Wrestling/GailKim, and The Wrestling/BellaTwins, who had been demanding he dance, despite his protests. Outside of an ill-advised split, he did pretty well for someone so against it.

* Willard's big secret in both the movie and musical version of ''Film/{{Footloose}}'' is that he "can't dance". In the musical, he actually quotes the title verbatim:
-->'''Willard:''' I can't do this! I can't dance!
::Cue the shrieking from Rusty and the other kids. He eventually learns over the course of "Let's Hear It for the Boy".

* Squall in ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyVIII'' protests that he can't dance. So he gets forcibly dragged onto the dance floor, and trips all over himself a lot until Rinoa finally gets him to loosen up, after which he [[YouSaidYouCouldntDance makes a liar of himself]] by nailing the remainder of the waltz perfectly. Later on, Squall admits to Rinoa that [=SeeDs=] are trained in a number of social skills to help with subterfuge, one of which is dancing in case of the need to approach a target or contact at a formal party.
* When Elizabeth tries to coax [[ByronicHero Booker]] into dancing with her during ''VideoGame/BioshockInfinite,'' he rebuffs her with a gruff "I don't dance." [[spoiler:Subverted with Comstock in "Burial At Sea".]]
* ''VideoGame/SaintsRowIV'': The DancePartyEnding reveals a shocking twist: [[spoiler: Johnny Gat can't dance for shit]].
* Being an ex-Templar who had been training with the order since his early teens, Cullen keeps telling people this at the imperial ball in ''VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition''. It doesn't stop them from asking; he's actually somewhat mobbed by interested courtiers. He gets into a little trouble if he's romanced since he accidentally rejects the question coming from his Inquisitorial ladylove, but he apologizes quickly, explaining that he never learned how to dance. At the end of the quest, he'll ask ''her,'' saying that "For you, I'll try."

** Tanna protests that she doesn't dance when Luero tries (and succeeds) to drag her into the dancing at the Taurëcuiva Festival, but she's actually rather good.
--->'''Tanna:''' ''[[http://www.earsforelves.com/archives/348 Dance]]''''!?'' I don't dance!\\

'''Tanna:''' [[http://www.earsforelves.com/archives/349 Okay fine]], it's not that I can't dance- I mean of course I learned how. I just haven't danced in a while.
** InvertedTrope: Unlike Luero, even though he told her to follow his lead. A few minutes after her reluctant entry to the dance floor:
--->'''Tanna:''' [[http://www.earsforelves.com/archives/351 Oh gods]]! You're terrible!!

[[folder:Web Original]]

* In one episode of ''WesternAnimation/TinyToonAdventures'', the prom is coming up and Buster doesn't know how to dance, so he watches some [[WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes Bugs Bunny cartoons]] to learn how.
* An episode of ''WesternAnimation/ChalkZone'' revolves around the fact that Rudy can't dance and he's going to be dancing with Penny the next night at the school dance. So he takes lessons in Chalkzone. When he finally learns, he finds out that Penny has trouble herself!
* Ed of ''WesternAnimation/EdEddNEddy'' protests that he can't dance when Rolf invitee him to participate in dancing to a folk song from the old country, until he finds out the "dance" simply consists of two people smacking the hell out of each other and yelling "That's my horse!", which Ed can do just fine.
* In one episode of ''WesternAnimation/TheFlintstones'', Fred and Barney decided to take ballroom dance lessons so that they could surprise Wilma and Betty by taking them dancing. In order to keep their wives from finding out, they join the Bedrock Volunteer Fire Department(which is a scam run by the men of Bedrock to allow them to get away from their wives; [[FridgeLogic since all buildings in Bedrock are made of stone, they can't catch fire]]).
* In the ''WesternAnimation/VeggieTales'' Silly Songs with Larry segment "Barbara Manatee", Barbara's boyfriend Bill reveals this after she asks him to take her to the ball. As this is a SoapOpera parody (emphasis on the "opera" part), this is taken as a huge shock and [[RuleOfDrama she plans to leave him over it]].
* In the ''WesternAnimation/{{Amphibia}}'' episode "Hop Pop and Lock", to impress his crush Sylvia, Hop Pop challenges his old rival Monroe to a dance-off, despite being dangerously clumsy and uncoordinated to the point that his random chaotic gyrations are considered horrifying. Anne is able to train him to at least be competent on the dance floor, but it turns out that Monroe is simply a far better dancer, forcing Hop Pop to resort to "freestyle"... as in his own bizarre dance routine. Fortunately, that turns out to be exactly what Sylvia is into...
%%* A topic of [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxeL9bdSu-A a classic '50s Goofy Cartoon.]]
* Parodied in ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'', where Peter fondly remembers how a beloved teacher taught him to dance "just in time" for prom. In flashback, we see that his "lesson" was an elaborate song-and-dance number during which Peter clearly already dances like a pro.
* ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' had this happen to Lisa when she tried taking tap dancing lessons and turned out to be absolutely terrible (though not through any fault of her own: her lessons consist solely of the words "tappa tappa tappa" which [[RuleOfFunny all of the other students manage to turn into instant dancing ability]]). Knowing that Homer and Marge are hoping to see her in the big recital, Lisa puts on a pair of self-tapping dancing shoes that [[MadScientist Professor Frink]] invented. She does pretty well to start, but when her teacher goes into the big solo, Lisa's shoes force her to follow suit. Then the crowd began applauding, as Lisa's shoes began to go completely haywire and she couldn't stop. Homer finally saves the day by tripping Lisa and knocking her off her feet.
* This was the plot of the pilot episode for ''WesternAnimation/{{Doug}}'', where Roger goes up to Doug before a costume dance the same day and tells him that he (Doug) can't dance.
* In ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'', Twilight Sparkle is a hilariously terrible dancer as seen in "Sweet and Elite". Though oddly, she's a perfectly capable dancer during the Musical Numbers.
** In ''[[WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyEquestriaGirls Equestria Girls]]'' there's a HighSchoolDance, and [[HumanityEnsues human-form]] Twilight manages to do the same bad dance. The ''exact'' same bad dance. Down to being on all fours.
* In "Franklin and the Firefly Festival" from ''[[Literature/{{Franklin}} Franklin and Friends]]'', Bear didn't want to be a part of the firefly festival because he didn't think he could dance and said as much, but his love his food causes him to do a HappyDance on his own.
* Hilariously subverted in a ''WesternAnimation/GarfieldAndFriends'' TV special "Garfield Gets a Life" when Garfield's owner [[ButtMonkey Jon]] heads out to the dance floor. Jon does an epic dance...but unfortunately, he's doing ''disco'' in the mid-1990s and gets ridiculed by everybody else in the club.

%%* ''WesternAnimation/SofiaTheFirst'' says this flat out in one episode.
* On ''WesternAnimation/SabrinaTheAnimatedSeries,'' Sabrina first laughs off Harvey saying this ("It's middle school! Just bite your lower lip and spaz around!"), until he claims that it's a "health hazard"--he used to take ballet until he knocked over the wall-sized mirror and his instructor had to get stitches. Since then, he's convinced that he can't dance around anyone else without hurting them.
* One episode of ''Literature/TheBerenstainBears'' cartoon has Brother Bear trying to get out of the annual Bear Country Jamboree by admitting to his parents that he can't dance. Mama Bear helps him learn how to dance by telling him to imagine the dance moves as sports moves since Brother is an excellent athlete.
* ''WesternAnimation/MollyOfDenali'': Subverted in the episode "[[Recap/MollyOfDenaliS1E23SealDanceSnowboardingQyahStyle Seal Dance]]." Nadia knows a lot of her people's traditional dances, but she struggles with the seal dance specifically, which affects her confidence.

* ''Series/{{Friends}}'': Chandler insists that he doesn't dance at weddings because he knows he's no good at it. He demonstrates with some [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UwM8km0ALbo incredibly awkward]] "dance moves" that involve shaking his hands and lifting his feet in an uncoordinated way. When he and Monica get married he tries to surprise her by taking dance lessons, but at the reception his shoes are so slippery he's forced to go back to his old moves.

* A topic of [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxeL9bdSu-A a classic '50s Goofy Cartoon.]]

* In ''Series/{{Zoey 101}}'' Chase is well aware that he is a terrible dancer. So when Zoey's partner for the PCA Dance Contest gets run over, he has Michael and Logan training him for two days straight. [[spoiler: We never get to see the result, as he oversleeps from exhaustion.]]

-->I can't dance, I can't talk
-->The only thing about me is the way that I walk
-->I can't dance, I can't sing
-->I'm just standing here sellin' everything

-->Tried movin' my body to the latest hit
-->Someone called the nurse, thought I was havin' a fit
-->I execute the moonwalk like I stepped in [[PrecisionFStrike shit]], I can't take it

--> I can read, I can write, I can shout, I can fight, I can kiss, I can bite, I can do it if I like, but everyone says I can't dance!

--> I can't dance, took a chance, And right then we started
--> Stumbling all around, stumbling all around, Stumbling all around, so funny
--> Stumbling here and there, stumbling everywhere, And I must declare
--> I stepped right on her toes, and when she bumped my nose, I fell, and when I rose, I felt ashamed!

-->''Yeah, now Bubba can scoot, Bubba can slide\\

'Cause if Bubba can dance I can too''

--->'''Tanna''': ''[[http://www.earsforelves.com/archives/348 Dance]]''''!?'' I don't dance!
--->'''Luero''': I believe you mean you ''won't'' dance. And you're about to be proven wrong.
--->'''Tanna''': [[http://www.earsforelves.com/archives/349 Okay fine]], it's not that I can't dance- I mean of course I learned how. I just haven't danced in a while.

--->'''Tanna''': [[http://www.earsforelves.com/archives/351 Oh gods]]! You're terrible!!

-->'''Jon''': Boy, you learn a dance, and then zango! 14 years later they change it!\\
'''Garfield''': Go figure.

* In ''Franchise/MassEffect'', Commander Shepard is an epic badass that is FamedInStory, but he/she just sucks at dancing. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gMqapcwkK1U&feature=related Watch]]. It became a {{meme}} after the first game and as such [[AscendedMeme got a lot of in-game references and jokes]] in the sequels.
** During Samara's loyalty quest in ''Mass Effect 2'', Shepard has the option of flirting with a dancing Asari at the club Afterlife. If you do not have a high enough Paragon/Renegade score for the Persuade/Intimidate options, or deliberately chose not to select them, Shepard dances poorly and the Asari rejects your flirtations. If you do select the Persuade/Intimidate options, [[SubvertedTrope Shepard very smoothly pulls off a dance routine and impresses the Asari.]]
** While meeting Garrus atop the presidium in ''Mass Effect 3'', the two engage in friendly banter and bragging:
-->'''Garrus:''' I'm not saying you can't handle a gun, but some of us know how to make it dance.\\
'''Shepard''': There are a few people who've seen me in action, Garrus. They seemed impressed.\\
'''Garrus''': Yeah, but I've actually seen you ''dance'', Shepard. No comment.
** When Shepard tries to get Jack to relax and dance on her shore leave, Jack flat-out states that everybody knows Shepard cannot dance.
** The Citadel DLC, the final DLC released for ''Mass Effect 3'', contains numerous references and conversations regarding Shepard dancing.
*** When Shepard begins dancing with a group of squadmates from the ''Normandy'':
--->'''Garrus''': We should record this and broadcast it to the Reapers. They'll either run away, melt down, or fall in love.
*** Shepard can try to goad Joker into dancing with EDI by saying that if he doesn't, ''you'' will. Joker proceeds to laugh uncontrollably at Shepard for ''[[OverlyLongGag half a minute]]'' before calmly saying, "Seriously, don't go there."
*** Ashley claims Shepard's dancing is related to drunkenness. Shepard takes it as a particularly low blow.
*** The DLC does, however, also contain an instance [[SubvertedTrope of Shepard unexpectedly rocking at dancing]]. If [=FemShep=] is romancing Garrus, he can pull her onto the dance floor for a tango. If the [[ActionCommand interrupts]] are hit in time, the two perform a dramatic and passionate tango that gets applause from the other people present.

-->, I'm just standing here sellin' everything

-->Tried movin' my body to the latest hit,
-->Someone called the nurse, thought I was havin' a fit,
-->I execute the moonwalk like I stepped in [[PrecisionFStrike shit]], I can't take it!