History Funny / WizardingSchoolMysteries

-->'''Gretchen:''' ...Politely, that is none of your business?

-->'''Gretchen:''' [[TheLastOfTheseIsNotLikeTheOthers Trick question.]] I ''don't'' introduce myself. Instead, I sneak in and [[NoSocialSkills find a wall to hide against until the whole thing is over.]]

* Rodrigo doing his best to get the others ready for the Samhain festival.

** Later, the dean teleports Evelina for the students' inquiry. She immediately gets in his face about what might have happened [[InconvenientSummons if she wasn't decent at the moment.]]

** Later, the dean teleports Evelina for the students' inquiry. She immediately gets in his face about what might have happened [[InconveniantSummons if she wasn't decent at the moment.]]

* Rodrigo incredoulsly telling James that he cannot go to the Samhein festival because...he dresses too shabby.

** Followed immediately by the other students leaving and saying similar things with varying amounts of insincerity ("Very bad things! Don't like it!", "So disappointed that what happened just now, uh, happened!"). Well, insincerity at first.

* Rodrigo incredoulsly telling James that he cannot go to the Samhein festival because...he dresses too shabby.

* Margot immediately getting scandalous thoughts when James suggests looking at Schwaa's satchel in his dorm with her.

* The AAAM's lost-and-found manager, Astrae Bygonn, is a positively weird-looking beast that has NoIndoorVoice...and meets James in a [[{{Irony}} library.]] His introduction? [[IncomingHam "JAY-MESS CHA-OO-KER!"]]

--> '''James:''' Alright, fine, we're ''mostly'' safe then! Fairly safe! Reasonably safe! Happy?

* Gretchen using TheoryOfNarrativeCausality to point out how "this is absolutely safe" is just TemptingFate.

** Ivan speculates that it eats dust bunnies. It doesn't.

* James and Ivan going on what amounts to a joyride on a FlyingCarpet the latter created while the girls just watch. Then the carpet turns sapient and goes berserk while they're riding it. How many stories do you know where such a carpet becomes a living predator?

* James and Ivan going on what amounts to a joyride on a FlyingCarpet the latter created while the girls just watch. Then the carpet turns sapient and goes berserk while they're riding it.

* After Margot volunteers to beat Polybeus up for insulting Ivan, James politely asks if he can watch when it happens.

* Margot chastising James for his reckless planning/sleep deprivation in true {{tsundere}} fashion.

* Margot chastising James for his reckless planning/sleep deprivation in true {{tsundre}} fashion.

** Later, Gretchen is able to fend the evil-doer off...with a goddamn broom. And even then, the extent of his villainy at that point was just [[PokeThePoodle painting "Lord Dhenregirr rules" on the wall".]] To add insult to injury, Ivan's first question is [[LiteralMinded "rules what?"]]

* After formulating something resembling a plan with Ivan and Grechen, James walks off...and then promptly collapses from SleepDeprivation.

** Once that's over, he practically skips away in joy, not noticing James walking right past him. Cue DoubleTake.

* Ivan [[LoveAtFirstSight falling head over heels in love]] with Rodrigo upon seeing him for the first time. As he talks to the Castalan noble, it's noted by the narration that he's speaking so fast it would make race-hounds quit in envy.

-->'''Ivan:''' They're beautiful and dangerous, like a...flower...that...spits...[[{{Metaphorgotten}} snakes?]]

** One of the few things we do hear from the first lecture is that Dermberder was born in a town called Pigsbladder. How charming.

* Gernderf's lectures. His long, droning, insomnia-curing lectures. Every student can agree that it's an endurance test just being there.

* Lord Dhenregirr at first appears to be a threatening ultra-powerful lich...but then he's revealed to be a BigBadWannabe that only Dermberder takes seriously. After an intimidating DynamicEntry in front of the new students, a gargoyle drops from the ceiling and squashes him flat. Dermberder has the gargoyle toss him off one of the towers while the summoned skeleton henchmen can only shrug their shoulders and follow.