History Funny / VampireTheMasqueradeBloodlines

** The girls at the bar will be horrified if you try to flirt with them. The answers you can give are pretty funny.
--> It's always about the looks, isn't it?

--> You are all the same!

[folder: Other Instances]]

!! Malkavian Playthrough

!! Other instances

** Another amusing option during the conversation. Notable in that it's available to any clan and it's one of the very few times [[DeadpanSnarker Beckett]] cannot think of something sarcastic to say.

--->'''PC:''' That guy on the History Network with the pith helmet? he made learning fun!

!! Malkavian Playhthrough

** The abuses for Dementation are just horrible (and horribly funny). While some, like making Chunk feel worthless are kinda sad, most of them are just plain CrazyAwesome.

** For bonus points, the player will actually hand over ten dollars if they have any. One can only imagine what the Cabbie's thinking as they leave.

* Another funny moment comes right at the end of a Ventrue playthrough, after talking with the Cabbie [[spoiler: who may be Caine himself]], they player can completely miss the hint and say:

* An ordinary and boring conversation gets a very unusual (and significant) twist while playing as a Malkavian -
-->'''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlx1nUvEHSs&t=3m20s Hostess]]:''' Hey, Andrea! Uh-huh? What? The Dark Father returns? No, he's not! No, he's not! No, he is ''not''! Hold on, Andrea, I've got another call. Hey, Serena, did you hear about-? Yeah, he is! Yes, he is! Yes, he totally is! I know! I was just on the phone with Andrea, and I was all "No, he's not!" Yes, he is!

** ''(About what's in the Sarcophagus)''

*** This can be seen as a bit of a forth-wall break as well, as a pallet-swap of the character model for the male Toreador is used as a generic NPC.

--->'''Fortune Teller''': You will have visitor next week... don't open door! ({{Beat}}) It Jehovah Witness! They ''so annoying''!

-->'''PC:''' "Maybe if you made a ''good'' decision for once..."
-->'''PC:''' "Okay, I'll play along. [[ServileSnarker Whatever is this about?]]"

-->'''Bertram:''' Save it Cleopatra, your silver tongue might tarnish licking this hide.

* [[HumanArchitectureHorror Andrei's mansion]] is a disgusting and horrifying place, but it's amusing to see how clean his fridge, stove and sink are compared to the rest. He even have a soap bar in his bathroom, showing he at least has a sense of personal hygiene.

--->InAWorld [[CaptainObvious where people live. . . and DIE]] [[OneManArmy "Do you think you can just go in there and handle this by yourself?"]] [[BadassBaritone "If that's what it takes!"]] [[ArchNemesis He was about to meet his greatest foe.]] [[IncomingHam "KILL THEM ALL!]] ''[[KillEmAll ALL OF THEM!"]]'' [[DesignatedLoveInterest And a girl.]] [[MeetCute "Hello." "Hi."]] [[PluckyComicRelief And a comic relief sidekick]] [[ShooOutTheClowns who won't make it to Act III.]] [[CasualDangerDialogue "I picked the wrong month to cancel my life insurance."]] [[HeroicBSOD "No. Don't say that! You're gonna make it!"]] [[TypeCasting With the guy from that other movie that was slightly popular, and whatshername, from that show you sometimes watch.]] [[ConspicuousCGI In a movie with two spectacular CGI battle sequences,]] [[AdvertisingCampaigns an an advertising campaign that will leave you no choice but to see this film.]] [[TropeOverdosed See it, because it's a movie, and all your friends are going.]] [[HilariousInHindsight In theaters Friday, and on DVD in three months.]]

** Players who have already finished the game will enjoy the Malkavian speaking to Rosa, the Malkavian thin-blood, as they give away plot points freely. When Rosa frets about what will happen when the sarcophagus is opened, the Malk will get excited and say, "Yes! The night sky will shine bright!" It's doubly funny if the Malk sides with Lacroix, proving that just because the Malk can see the future, ''he's too crazy to pay attention to its warnings''.

*** The Malk can even get close enough telling Jack about that secret: Jack'll chuckle that if the Malk actually knew half about what he was babbling about, Jack would [[HeKnowsTooMuch dust him on the spot.]]

*** The Malk can even get close enough telling Jack about that secret: Jack'll chuckle that if the Malk actually knew half about what he was babbling about, Jack would dust him on the spot.

** [[spoiler:Before you stab [=LaCroix=] with his letter opener: "Give you a massive chest wound? My pleasure!"]]

* Throughout the game one can listen to a radio show where a woman takes calls from all sorts of people that tend to be oddballs. One of the more special guests though is [[spoiler:''[[EvilIsPetty Andrei the Tzimisce]]'']]. After his rants about how the end of the world is coming, the radio host just brushes off his statement and continues with her show.

* A more intellectual bit of humor is the fact that the entire game is one long SpannerInTheWorks joke. [=LaCroix=] sends you on a mission [[spoiler: to die almost immediately after you're embraced. You survive because the Sabbat aren't at the warehouse at the time and then go on to pretty much survive every trap laid out for you.]] By the end, [[spoiler:[=LaCroix=]'s entire empire has unraveled because of your obstinate refusal to die when you're told.]]

*** What's even funnier is that speaking to Rosa proves the Malk knows [[spoiler:the sarcophagus is full of TNT, and is actually ''telling Beckett what's inside''.]]

* The Anarch and independent endings, provided you kept your Humanity up. [[spoiler:Karmic retribution on [=LaCroix=]?]] Good. [[spoiler:Karmic retribution that gives him just enough time to watch his aspirations turn to ash before blowing him sky-high without you having to lift a finger?]] Better. [[spoiler:Karmic retribution that you realize [[GambitRoulette has been set up before the plot started]], has spent the plot getting to its rightful recipient, and comes complete with a send-off note with a smiley face on it that makes [=LaCroix=] [[LaughingMad crow like a madman]]?]] ''Hilarious''. Even better if playing Independent Ventrue, giving Nines the finger after his grumbling about you being a Camarilla suckup.

* If you sneak around the Elizabeth Dane and eavesdrop on the cops, you'll hear some of them talking about the symbols written in blood around the sarcophagus. They will go over various possibilities - occultism, gang symbols, pirate signs - until one of them provides a completely mundane, but hilarious explanation. Oh, [[spoiler:Jack]], you're such a troll.

* If you manage to hack the mails on Milligan's computer, you can find two mails. One of them is from an angry viewer who rightfully calls out Haunted LA for being a hoax... except the ''one'' example he lists (their episode stating [[spoiler:there is a werewolf in Griffith Park]]) turns out to actually be true later on in the game.

** Another less frequent caller is a [[StonersAreFunny stoner]] [[InsaneTrollLogic who thinks that pizza is the key to resolving]] UserfulNotes/TheWarOnTerror. Even funnier is that you later actually get to see him in the Red Spot, staring at one of the aisles spouting off a bunch of stoner nonsense.

*** In the old Soviet fairytale-based films, Baba Yaga indeed [[http://img-fotki.yandex.ru/get/6417/121447594.1f9/0_a5fc9_784bd633_XL.jpg looks the part]].