History Funny / MyLittlePonyTotallyLegitRecap

Everything is the same color, her sleeves look like they belong in Victorian England, there's too much poofiness on top of her hair, who the fuck wears pins on their legs, and while having a siren wear a [[JustForPun siren suit]] is clever, that shouldn't have been the basis for her outfit. [[FelonyMisdemeanor And her leggings are just tacky.]]

** DWK starts out speaking in a combination Mysterious Whisper and BadassBaritone that perfectly sets the mood for the sirens [[EmotionEater draining the humans of their life energy...]] and then when he sees them, he immediately goes back to normal tone and starts sperging out over his three new waifus.

* Sombra's CampGay lisp. Sure, he could easily use a BadassBaritone, but he feels inauthentic whenever he does.

'''Twilight:''' Look, I'm just trying not to say the word "Race", okay? [[PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad It's not PC enough anymore]].\\

Everything is the same color, her sleeves look like they belong in Victorian England, there's too much poofiness on top of her hair, who the fuck wears pins on their legs, and while having a siren wear a [[JustForPun siren suit]] is [[ActuallyPrettyFunny clever,]] that shouldn't have been the basis for her outfit. [[FelonyMisdemeanor And her leggings are just tacky.]]

** Aria complains that getting people to care enough to fight about things in real life is impossible these days. Adagio retorts that if she could figure out a way to [[{{GIFT}} absorb negative energy through the Internet]], the Sirens could take over the entire multiverse in a day.

** And the bad future is what would happen if people [[{{GIFT}} acted like they do on the internet]].

* Instead of a vow of silence, the Kirin forgot how to speak because they spent too much time on the internet. Also, [[{{GIFT}} when they flame each other online]], they catch on fire in real life. Rain Shine tried to unplug the router when this became apparent, but there were too many wires, so she couldn't figure out the right one.

--->'''DWK:''' (laughing uncontrollably) Oh my God, no wait wait wait, I was wrong! ''Everyone'' is retarded! Everyone involved in this farce of a sabotage, whether intentionally or not, needs to be put on a bus and be sent to the special school across town. Sunset, was ''this'' your plan? ''This'' was the ace up your sleeve? How did you even ''do'' this? You take pictures with a smartphone, and then print them out and cut them up, and what? Use a color copier to combine them together? Or wait, did you use a scanner and then print them again? And then, for the finishing move - the coup-de-fucking-grace - leave the photos in plain sight at the top of a school trash can?! ''Masterful!''

''(later)''\\

*** Sonata he brushes over with a 10/10, she's just right. Pony!Rarity pops up to congratulate her.

-->'''Twilight''': You know dude. I don't even fucking care anymore.\\
'''Starlight''': Thanks, Twilight, [[SarcasmMode you're an awesome teacher.]]\\
'''Twilight''': [[SarcasmBlind I know dude. I know.]]

'''Rainbow Dash:''' Dude, that's nonsense. Does this look like cancer to you? ''(hold up her smug face from "Stranger Than Fanfiction")''

-->'''Luna''': Dude, this is gonna be ''so'' easy! All I have to do is smile and talk to people. ''(One second later)'' Oh, fuck, I forgot: I can't smile and I hate people! I - agh - how do scissors work? I can't - I - fuck! Roses!? I - how do I stand in a place? Fuck! Shit! My face doesn't work! '''''FUCK! SHIT!'''''

'''Rarity:''' ''(smug face)'' Well, I don't like to brag or anything...\\

''(fade to silence, followed by an omen of the old gods destroying everyone's headcanons)''

'''Granny Smith:''': Wait, hold on just a second.\\

'''Applejack:''' It's not just that. I kept reading, and I learnt other true shit, too. The Wonderbolts are spraying chemicals in the atmosphere, Celestia and Luna are actually lizard ponies, the earth is flat, [[VideoGame/{{Portal}} the cake is a lie]], and our entire reality, even our thoughts and voices, is an animated simulation created by interdimensional puppeteers called Canadians!

--->'''Rainbow:''' Anyway,suck my dick Trixie!

--->'''Rainbow:''' Anyway, Trixie, suck my dick!

--->'''Trixie:''' Whip it out, bitch, I'll make you want to ''marry me''.

'''Rarity:''' ''(smug face)'' Well, I don't like to brag or anything...

-->'''Rainbow:''' You know Twilight, I finally realize something. I am an asshole! But it's okay, because I've found my people.

* "Thanks for literally saving my life, but I don't like you or anything. ({{Beat}}.) Baka."

** [[AC: That Is My Fetish]]\\

** [[AC: This Is Your Dick]]\\

** [[AC: This is me in the morning]]\\

Corollary: [[AC: Because of the plushie]]
** [[AC: CHEETOS AND VASELINE]]\\

[[AC: INTERMISSION!]]\\

** [[AC: I Like Your Holes]]\\

---> '''Rainbow:''' Eat my ass, you cum-colored Christmas ornament!

---> '''DWK:''' (laughing uncontrollably) Oh my God, no wait wait wait, I was wrong! ''Everyone'' is retarded! Everyone involved in this farce of a sabotage, whether intentionally or not, needs to be put on a bus and be sent to the special school across town. Sunset, was ''this'' your plan? ''This'' was the ace up your sleeve? How did you even ''do'' this? You take pictures with a smartphone, and then print them out and cut them up, and what? Use a color copier to combine them together? Or wait, did you use a scanner and then print them again? And then, for the finishing move - the coup-de-fucking-grace - leave the photos in plain sight at the top of a school trash can?! ''Masterful!''

----> '''Sonata:''' I'll take dick!\\

---> '''Pinkie:''' Fire crotch, fire crotch! Sunny has a fire crotch!

** FreezeFrameBonus time! A picture of Treehugger appears after a brief rant about the musical inaccuracies, with the caption: [[AC: it's time for a lecture from professor pothead]]. We'll give you a minute.

----> '''DWK:''' You look like a walking personality disorder.

---> '''Adagio:''' I dunno, sounds kinda dumb. I don't think it'll catch on.

---> '''Rarity:''' Check this out guys. Pretty dope, huh?\\

---> '''Brad:''' Pfft! What Holocaust?

----> '''Twilight:''' [[WhatTheHellHero AJ, what the fuck?!]]

----> '''Pinkie Pie:''' I have no fucking idea what you guys are talking about but I got an opinion on it. Like and subscribe.

---> '''Sonata:''' Is it really ethical for us to help someone who clearly has a myriad of mental health issues exploit them to dodge responsibility that she not only undeniably did but was very clearly a result of those issues in the first place?

---> '''Sonata:''' Please God, forgive me, but this is the only way.

[[AC: "The Crystalling Part 1"]]

--> '''Spike:''' All right you assholes, Cadance just popped her [[UnusualEuphemism crotch-biscuit]] and we have to go to the Crystal Empire to help her take care of the kid or whatever.

[[AC: "The Crystalling Part 2"]]

---> '''Applejack:''' Twilight, I know you love Celestia. I mean, we all do, she's a very nice lady and I respect her immensely. But I think she might be a [[PrecisionFStrike fucking]] idiot.

--> '''Spike:''' Dude, you think that was weird for you? Turned my dick into a curtain rod and then you just ''left''.

--> '''Starlight:''' So... what's goin' on?\\

[[AC: "Gift Of The Maud Pie"]]

--> '''Maud:''' You're a sleazy street grifter with obvious hormonal deficiencies who cons people out of things that bring them joy amidst this nightmarish imprisonment in flesh we call existence. There's nothing I could do that would make your life worse, [[CrossesTheLineTwice you absolute abortion of a person.]]

[[AC: "On Your Marks"]]

--> '''DWK:''' Scootaloo likes being an adrenaline junkie, Sweetie Bell likes finding new and more elaborate ways to be boring, and Apple Bloom likes [[BreadEggsMilkSquick desperately clinging to her rapidly dissolving childhood.]]

** About Sweetie B's shitty scarf and how her relentless optimism, positivity, and sense of self-worth is unnatural
** And about how the CMC will grow apart and only meet up maybe once a year and get drunk and promise to stay in touch but never will and will feel guilty- or at least, that's his interpretation. Maybe she's thinking something else.

[[AC: "Gauntlet Of Fire"]]

* Spike- and by extension, all dragons- is a cell phone.

--> '''DWK:''' He sucks dicks and drinks jizz out of solo cups, and that's all that needs to be said.

--> '''DWK:''' I can never give Spike shit because I'm ''jealous'' of him. He looks at his life and says, "Sweet! This is perfect!" I look at my life and say, "Welp. Time to get drunk."

[[AC: "No Second Prances"]]

* This exchange when Starlight comes to actually talk about an issue,

[[AC: "Newbie Dash"]]

---> '''[[{{Jerkass}} Fleetfoot:]]''' Liiiithium.

--> '''Rainbow:''' You know Twilight, I finally realize something. I am an asshole! But it's okay, because I've found my people.

[[AC: "A Hearthswarming Tail"]]

** And the bad future is what would happen if people [[{{GIFT}} acted like they do on the internet]]

[[AC: "Saddle Row Review"]]
* Coco Pommel's cold gets turned into a drug addiction, which she bails on Rarity last minute to get treatment for

* Vinyl as much as admits she follows the Mane 6 around Equestria

[[AC: "Applejack's 'Day' Off"]]

[[AC: "Flutter Brutter"]]

** Zephyr is hitting on Dash so hard DWK had to change the rating to TV-MA instead of TV-Y

--> '''Futtershy:''' You're getting a fucking job!

[[AC: "Spice Up Your Life"]]

----> '''Random Pony 1:''' Well, Rarity said we could like it, and she's kinda famous, so we tried it, and it's fuckin' awesome! So, you know, choke on a dick!\\

[[AC: "The Cart Before the Ponies"]]
* DWK is [[AllGuysWantCheerleaders distracted by Cheerilee in a cheerleader costume]] and blowing a trumpet to start the race. He then makes several "horn-y" jokes before wondering if [[OverusedRunningGag that's enough horn jokes, because he's got plenty more]].
-->'''DWK:''' Oh my goodness. Cheerilee-sensei, what are you trying to do to me?

[[AC: "Stranger Than Fanfiction"]]

--> '''DWK:''' Body pillows are not for people who are loved!

--> '''DWK:''' [[SarcasmMode I was going to kill myself after I finished making this video, but now I have hope!]]

[[AC: "Buckball Season"]]

--> '''Applejack:''' The court is divided into right field and left field. As long as all of your skill at the game comes completely out of left field, you're doing it right.

[[AC: "Where the Apple Lies"]]

[[AC: "To Where and Back Again"]]

--> '''Trixie:''' Oh god, no wonder this episode about us, there’s no one left!
--> '''The Narrator:''' Oh look! Steve's (Thorax) back. And so is Discord.
--> '''Discord:''' Oh fuck you, I don't feel like helping.
--> '''Starlight:''' Dude, they stole your Waifu.
--> '''Discord:''' (Immediately gets ready to go.)
--> '''DWK:''' Discord you may be a dick, but you've got your priorities in order.
* Rainbow Dash asking [[spoiler: what's a lesbian]], as the very last line of the first season.

--> '''Rarity:''' Spike, please tell me you brought some vodka.

[[AC: "Forever Filly"]]

[[AC: "Parental Glideance"]]

[[AC: "Hard to Say Anything"]]

[[AC: "A Royal Problem"]]

[[AC: "Fame and Misfortune"]]

[[AC: "Triple Threat"]]

** DWK ran a poll before publishing the video to see who was the favorite siren. The winner? "DWK sucks cocks". At 36%, too. Moreover, he apparently was expecting this.