History Funny / JonTronSeasonOne

** Immediately after this, Jon does a short musical number in which he lampoons the creative decisions made in ''Star Fox Adventures,'' including the use of stock sound effects, the requirement of getting items that have no relevance to the plot whatsoever in order to progress the story, and the removal of Falco from the game, the latter of which Jon compares to replacing [[Franchise/DonkeyKong King K. Rool]] with another antagonist (which he immediately notes that they did; "in ''VideoGame/DonkeyKongCountryReturns'' they replaced him with wood").

[[folder:Stairfax Temperatures]]

* Also, from the same review:
-->'''Jon''': ''[Pretending to be a stoned Sonic Team member after snorting a line of cocaine, with a FakeBrit accent]'' *big sniff* '''''OOOOOOOOOOO--''''' ''(SmashCut to Jon in his kitchen)'' Welcome to Sonic Team! We make games, I think![[note]]Though the British accent would make it more fitting for Creator/TravellersTales, the other developer that worked on the game.[[/note]]

-->'''Jon:''' ''(singing slightly off-key)'' ♪ '''''AND IIIIIIIII''''' ♪ -- ''''''[[PrecisionFStrike HOLY SHIT!]]''''' -- ♪ '''''[[Film/TheBodyguard WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU]]''''' ♪ -- '''''[[TheyChangedItNowItSucks I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!]]'''''

-->'''Jon:''' ''(singing slightly off-key)'' ♪ '''''AND IIIIIIIII -- [[PrecisionFStrike HOLY SHIT!]] -- [[Film/TheBodyguard WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU]] -- [[TheyChangedItNowItSucks I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!]]''''' ♪

-->'''Jon:''' ''(singing slightly off-key)'' ♪ '''''AND IIIIIIIII-- [[PrecisionFStrike HOLY SHIT!]] -- [[Film/TheBodyguard WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU]] -- [[TheyChangedItNowItSucks I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!]]''''' ♪

-->'''Jon:''' ''(singing slightly off-key)'' ♪ '''''AND IIIIIIIII-- [[PrecisionFStrike HOLY SHIT!]] -- [[Film/TheBodyguard WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU]]-- [[TheyChangedItNowItSucks I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!]]''''' ♪

-->'''Jon:''' ''(singing slightly off-key)'' ♪ '''''AND IIIIIIIII-- [[PrecisionFStrike HOLY SHIT!]] -- [[Film/TheBodyguard WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU]] [[TheyChangedItNowItSucks I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!]]''''' ♪

-->'''Jon''': [[RacingGame Cars...?]] [[GenreShift Cars?!]] '''[[GoMadFromTheRevelation CAAAAAAARS!!!!!]]'''\\
''(an instrumental of "[[Music/WhitneyHouston I Will Always Love You]]" starts playing)''\\
'''Jon:''' ''(singing slightly off-key)'' ♪ [[Music/WhitneyHouston AND IIIIIIIII]]-- '''''[[PrecisionFStrike HOLY SHIT!]]''''' --[[Film/TheBodyguard WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU]] '''[[TheyChangedItNowItSucks I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT,]]''' '''''[[TheyChangedItNowItSucks HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!]]''''' ♪

-->'''Jon''': [[RacingGame Cars...?]] [[GenreShift Cars?!]] '''[[GoMadFromTheRevelation CAAAAAAARS!!!!!]]''' *off-key* ♪ [[Music/WhitneyHouston AND IIIIIIIII]] '''''[[PrecisionFStrike HOLY SHIT!]]''''' [[Film/TheBodyguard WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU]] '''[[TheyChangedItNowItSucks I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT,]]''' '''''[[TheyChangedItNowItSucks HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!]]''''' ♪

** Jon trying to bash the cartridge to bits with a cheap dollar-store plastic [[DropTheHammer Mjolnir]], only for [[DidntThinkThisThrough the opposite to happen and the toy to be quickly obliterated from the abuse]]. Jon just takes the wrecked handle and pretends it's a microphone, just because it resembles one. He then starts ''singing bad karaoke'' while the video's frame rate is slowed to a crawl, making him sound like a sedated Chewbacca.

-->'''Jon''': No, I--! What kind of death sound is this? I-I can't even get over it! I think this is the absolute fastest a game has left me speechless. [[{{Angrish}} Literally, with the motherfuckin']] ''[[{{Angrish}} humming]]'' [[{{Angrish}} and the...]] ''bring on the Mariachi band!'' [Music/FleshgodApocalypse - [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPsBevd6V5w Embodied Deception]] plays while the background is set on fire] '''(angrily):''' That's not Mariachi!

--> '''Jon:''' ''Oh, no...'' ''I really bit the'' '''''[[SuddenlyShouting BIG ONE AGAIN]]!'''''

--->'''Jon''': *barely containing a laugh* Yeah that's right, you type ''bashe1'' to start the game... MS-DOS, ladies and gentlemen

* The beginning had this gem:

-->'''Jon''': As gracefully as the beautiful black swan. How could it be possible to be so stupid and so magical all at the same time? Surely, we will never know. I mean, have you goddamn seen this guy?

* Jon's response to being fooled during his ''VideoGame/{{Nightshade}}'' video:

* * Jon asks for a high-five. Jacques slaps Jon with a mouse-cursor hand... somehow.

** [[AC: [[GraveHumor But I Didn't Die Though It Was A Joke]]]]

** "Don’t you, YOU CAN’T PASS. That’s the line right? From the movie the Hobbit 2?"

* In his Top 10 SNES Games video, at the end of the VideoGame/{{Earthbound}} part where he's talking about Earthbound as an experience. "I mean, look at VideoGame/HeavyRain!" Cue yet another mockery of [[MemeticMutation Press X to Jason]], except the last one ''crashes''. And then [[BrickJoke it shows up again]] at the end of the VideoGame/SuperMarioRPG part. "So to cap it off, I'll just say-''[[CutawayGag Jason!]]''"

* The face Jon makes when actual [[WhatDoYouMeanItWasntMadeOnDrugs gameplay]] is shown for the first time.

--> '''Jon''': You got all your normal kinds of monster madness going on here in the background: killer plants, spiders, minotaurs, tempu--OH...Tempura...Shrimp? [[EverythingTryingToKillYou Oh...]] ...[[ThisIsGonnaSuck this is gonna be one of those days, isn't it]]?

* "Timmy entered the TV world when he ''[[AccidentalInnuendo touched his dad's]]'' '''''[[AccidentualInnuendo science device...?]]'''''"

* "Timmy entered the TV world when he [[AccidentalInnuendo touched his dad's science device.]]"

--> '''Jon:''' Hmm, if Timmy's dad isn't careful, his science device just might land him 10 to 20 years in prison.

* Jon's reaction to the Angels' idle animations.
-->'''Jon:''' ''Dance, Lucy, dance! Your career'' '''depends''' ''on it!''

'''Jon''': Oh, yeah. I l--I lost Rockington. I lo--I LOST A '''ROCK!'''[[note]]Jon would reveal years later in a Q&A that he ''legitimately lost Rockington'' and that this was his honest reaction.[[/note]]

'''Jon''': Oh, yeah. I l--I lost Rockington. I lo--I LOST A '''ROCK!''' [[note]]Jon would reveal years later in a Q&A that he ''legitimately lost Rockington'' and that this was his honest reaction.[[/note]]

-->'''Jon''': ''[Pretending to be a stoned Sonic Team member after snorting a line of cocaine, with a FakeBrit accent]'' Welcome to Sonic Team! We make games, I think![[note]]Though the British accent would make it more fitting for Creator/TravellersTales, the other developer that worked on the game.[[/note]]

* "Nightshade likes it to be night. In the shade. Doesn't wanna acknowledge curtains...''[[LeftItIn uh, fuck, cut that, just cut that whole...]]''"

--> '''Jon:''' Okay, yeah, that's fine. Nothingwrongthere-Idontseeanythingwrongthere dishwasher? YES.

* "''Aquaman: Battle for Atlantis'' hit store shelves for a mere 20 dollars and received such crowning scores as [[SuddenlyShouting RUN! RUN]], ''[[DontAskJustRun FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!]]'' '''''[[Horrible/VideoGames RUN!]]'''''"

-->"Maybe someday, the [=N64=] will be so advanced, that you can make your ex-wife actually feel the pain. (''[[SurpriseCreepy smile fades as eerie music plays and camera zooms in on Malkovich's face]]'')

-->'''Jon''': [[IncrediblyLamePun Good one]], [[ItMakesSenseInContext Bubsy!]] Hey, wanna be a cast member on [[Series/SaturdayNightLive Sat-purr-day Night Live]]? I know you'll make the '''''[[{{Pun}} MEOWST''''']] of it! ''(Cut to black, suddenly distant)'' I'm leavin' ya, Bubsy!