History FanDisservice / TheNostalgiaCritic

* MrFanservice Zod is doing porn in ''Film/TheHauntedMansion'', but only because his castration from the ''Film/ManOfSteel'' is so bad he gets money from BileFascination viewers.

* Doug's costume in the ''Film/FantasticFour2005'' review. It's tight and there's not much of it, but it's also eye-searingly orange and gets covered with dorito bits. In the making of, Doug is enjoying the hell out of it and tells Rob to quote ''Film/{{Dune}}'' because he knows he wants to. At first Rob laughs “gay pride and loving it”. Tamara also says he looks like a gay Big Bird, and Doug corrects that he makes Big Bird look straight.

* Critic half-naked should be a cause for celebration, but in ''Film/JurassicPark'' when there's visible rib showing, and his arm is skinnier than a teenage girl's, you're just left wanting to force-feed him that pizza.
* The "What's With All The Princess Hate?" title card. Critic in [[WebVideo/DemoReel Tacoma]]'s [[WesternAnimation/BeautyAndTheBeast Belle]] costume should have been {{fanservice}} like the {{stripperific}} [[Franchise/TheLegendOfZelda Link]] cosplay and the air hostess outfit in the first DVD menu, but instead he's miserable and so skinny that a woman's outfit is slipping off him.

* Less physical and more mental, but he says in the ''Film/BridgeToTerabithia'' review that he's lost all feeling in his balls since the {{Groin Attack}}s from the Brawl and ''WebVideo/SuburbanKnights''. Which means the vast amount of sex he's had never gave him ''[[RagingStiffie that]]'' kind of pleasure.
* He has “empty, hollow and not nearly over fast enough” offscreen sex with ''WesternAnimation/EightCrazyNights'' that sounds more like he ended up raping it than anything else. Ask That Guy had violent sounding sex before, but at least both participants kept sounding they were enjoying it.
* Hard to enjoy the two attractive guys on the bed in "The Top 11 Strangest And Best Couples" when one wants to throw up at getting touched and unlike the millions of examples on TGWTG ([[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duYkhO2XbsI from]] [[http://blip.tv/nostalgiacritic/nostalgia-critic-specials-spooning-with-spoony-ep-02-2983114 Doug]] [[http://blip.tv/nostalgiacritic/nostalgia-critic-star-trek-insurrection-5941890 even]]) of the same where they're at least enjoying the queer tease, the whole joke here is just gay panic.
* Ever thought “oh hey we miss Doug getting SexySoakedShirt scenes”? Well ''Film/GhostDad'' gives that, just with the slight... twist... that he's committing suicide by soaking himself with gasoline and lighting a match.
* ''Film/SonOfTheMask'' gives us a long view of Critic's ass. This would be great if he weren't weeping brokenly about not being allowed to die. Same goes for ''Pearl Harbor'' and his version of Michael Bay when he's having a HeroicBSOD on the stairs. WebVideo/DemoReel had done the same thing, objectified Donnie when he was sad to make a MaleGaze point, but it wasn't so jarring.

* The title card for the ''Film/AmericanBeauty'' editorial puts [[http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/nostalgia-critic/44589-does-american-beauty-still-hold-up Doug's sad tired face on Mena Suvari's skinny under-age naked body]].
* The “Is Eyes Wide Shut Artsy Porn” [[http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/images/stories/front/neye.jpg title card]] with shirtless Critic. It's not that he looks scared or is trying to cover himself, a lot of people like that, it's the masks behind him and how in the episode he talks about nightmares where he's broken down and exposed that makes it more invasive.

* In the Bay parody of what he'd be like currently doing the Got Milk commercial, Tamara is a prize, but she's giant grotesque boobs and huge lips.

* The "What's With All The Princess Hate?" title card. Critic in [[WebVideo/DemoReel Tacoma]]'s [[Disney/BeautyAndTheBeast Belle]] costume should have been {{fanservice}} like the {{stripperific}} [[Franchise/TheLegendOfZelda Link]] cosplay and the air hostess outfit in the first DVD menu, but instead he's miserable and so skinny that a woman's outfit is slipping off him.

* In ''Film/SuicideSquad'', Rob as the Chart Guy starts to masturbate. Lampshaded by Critic who never wants to see that.

* He has “empty, hollow and not nearly over fast enough” offscreen sex with ''Film/EightCrazyNights'' that sounds more like he ended up raping it than anything else. Ask That Guy had violent sounding sex before, but at least both participants kept sounding they were enjoying it.

* PlayedForLaughs in “Ghost Rider 2”, as Doug (in a wife-beater!) starts to masturbate, but his dick disintegrates and he's horrified for good reason. ItMakesSenseInContext.

* Tamara is in cleavage-enhancing leather during ''Matrix Month'', but she can't move her body or her face, and [[spoiler: as she's been brainwashed, isn't wearing it of her own free will]].

%% FanDumb belongs on the YMMV page.

* The “Is Eyes Wide Shut Artsy Porn” [[http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/images/stories/front/neye.jpg title card]] with shirtless Critic. It's not that he looks scared or is trying to cover himself, a lot of people like that, it's the masks behind him and how in the episode he talks about nightmares where he's broken down and exposed that makes it more invasive than [[invoked]] FetishFuel.

* Critic half-naked should be a cause for celebration, but in ''JurassicPark'' when there's visible rib showing, and his arm is skinnier than a teenage girl's, you're just left wanting to force-feed him that pizza.

* ''SonOfTheMask'' gives us a long view of Critic's ass. This would be great if he weren't weeping brokenly about not being allowed to die. Same goes for ''Pearl Harbor'' and his version of Michael Bay when he's having a HeroicBSOD on the stairs. WebVideo/DemoReel had done the same thing, objectified Donnie when he was sad to make a MaleGaze point, but it wasn't so jarring.

** Critic half-naked should be a cause for celebration, but in ''JurassicPark'' when there's visible rib showing, and his arm is skinnier than a teenage girl's, you're just left wanting to force-feed him that pizza.
** The "What's With All The Princess Hate?" title card. Critic in [[WebVideo/DemoReel Tacoma]]'s [[Disney/BeautyAndTheBeast Belle]] costume should have been {{fanservice}} like the {{stripperific}} [[Franchise/TheLegendOfZelda Link]] cosplay and the air hostess outfit in the first DVD menu, but instead he's miserable and so skinny that a woman's outfit is slipping off him.
** The TGWTG 4 DVD menu. The first one had Doug in a skimpy dress, the second was an incesty shower scene, the third advertisement was him shirtless and DepravedBisexual, but while this involves uniforms and leather jackets, he intentionally makes himself look sicker than normal by smearing on eyeliner under his eyes.
** He went so above and beyond in the ''Anime/SailorMoon'' “talking dick” scene that it was actually discussed in a real article:

** Less physical and more mental, but he says in the ''Film/BridgeToTerabithia'' review that he's lost all feeling in his balls since the {{Groin Attack}}s from the Brawl and ''WebVideo/SuburbanKnights''. Which means the vast amount of sex he's had never gave him ''[[RagingStiffie that]]'' kind of pleasure.
** He has “empty, hollow and not nearly over fast enough” offscreen sex with ''Film/EightCrazyNights'' that sounds more like he ended up raping it than anything else. Ask That Guy had violent sounding sex before, but at least both participants kept sounding they were enjoying it.
** Hard to enjoy the two attractive guys on the bed in "The Top 11 Strangest And Best Couples" when one wants to throw up at getting touched and unlike the millions of examples on TGWTG ([[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duYkhO2XbsI from]] [[http://blip.tv/nostalgiacritic/nostalgia-critic-specials-spooning-with-spoony-ep-02-2983114 Doug]] [[http://blip.tv/nostalgiacritic/nostalgia-critic-star-trek-insurrection-5941890 even]]) of the same where they're at least enjoying the queer tease, the whole joke here is just gay panic.
** Ever thought “oh hey we miss Doug getting SexySoakedShirt scenes”? Well ''Film/GhostDad'' gives that, just with the slight... twist... that he's committing suicide by soaking himself with gasoline and lighting a match.
** ''SonOfTheMask'' gives us a long view of Critic's ass. This would be great if he weren't weeping brokenly about not being allowed to die. Same goes for ''Pearl Harbor'' and his version of Michael Bay when he's having a HeroicBSOD on the stairs. WebVideo/DemoReel had done the same thing, objectified Donnie when he was sad to make a MaleGaze point, but it wasn't so jarring.
** PlayedForLaughs in “Ghost Rider 2”, as Doug (in a wife-beater!) starts to masturbate, but his dick disintegrates and he's horrified for good reason. ItMakesSenseInContext.
** The title card for the ''Film/AmericanBeauty'' editorial puts [[http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/nostalgia-critic/44589-does-american-beauty-still-hold-up Doug's sad tired face on Mena Suvari's skinny under-age naked body]].
** The “Is Eyes Wide Shut Artsy Porn” [[http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/images/stories/front/neye.jpg title card]] with shirtless Critic. It's not that he looks scared or is trying to cover himself, a lot of people like that, it's the masks behind him and how in the episode he talks about nightmares where he's broken down and exposed that makes it more invasive than [[invoked]] FetishFuel.
** Tamara is in cleavage-enhancing leather during ''Matrix Month'', but she can't move her body or her face, and [[spoiler: as she's been brainwashed, isn't wearing it of her own free will]].
** MrFanservice Zod is doing porn in ''Film/TheHauntedMansion'', but only because his castration from the ''Film/ManOfSteel'' is so bad he gets money from BileFascination viewers.
** Doug's costume in the ''Film/FantasticFour2005'' review. It's tight and there's not much of it, but it's also eye-searingly orange and gets covered with dorito bits. In the making of, Doug is enjoying the hell out of it and tells Rob to quote ''Film/{{Dune}}'' because he knows he wants to. At first Rob laughs “gay pride and loving it”. Tamara also says he looks like a gay Big Bird, and Doug corrects that he makes Big Bird look straight.
** In ''Film/EventHorizon'', Critic bent over a table showing his ass and asking people to look up there would be heavy ShipTease if his asshole wasn't the place of hell.
** In-universe, Tamara has thirst for Jeff Goldblum, so she's even more disturbed by all the BodyHorror in ''Film/TheFly1986''.
** Rob really wants to troll with a clipless 50 Shades review, promising that Doug, Tamara and Malcolm will take clothes off… and then it turns out that the re-enacting is done by sock puppets.