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Reviews FanFic / Partially Kissed Hero

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DemiserofD Since: Nov, 2010
04/08/2013 20:36:38 •••

The Sugar of the Fanfiction Food Pyramid

The first thing you need to realize about Partially Kissed Hero is that it isn't so much a Story as a combination of a world-building experiment and a Soap Opera. The point going into the story isn't the development of the plot, it's watching as the world evolves, and that world just so happens to include the characters.

The problem with this is that it entails virtually no character development. Harry, despite the rather large increase in power he(theoretically) receives throughout the story, acts essentially the same in chapter 99 as he did in chapter one. You have this vast world he's built, with things going on multiple planets, multiple places in time, and multiple groups of people, but even with all that(or perhaps because of it), nothing ever feels sharp, defined, INTERESTING.

Which brings me to the title; no matter how much of this story you read, you'll never feel that satisfaction that reading a truly good fanfic brings. I actually started feeling almost the same way you feel after eating too much sugar; for some godforsaken reason still wanting a bit more, and yet feeling more and more ill with every bite.

So I cannot recommend reading this fanfic.

Another problem with this fanfic is the lack of a competent foe. Over and over we're told how the Dark Lord is the worst enemy they'll ever face, and how he has all these methods of killing them practically instantly, but the trouble is that he's been built up so much that if they DO face him, they'll get obliterated practically instantly, which means they have to keep NOT facing him. Which leads to them basically just running around behind his back and blowing up one wall while he patches another, making the supposedly near-omnipotent Dark Lord seem just as incompetent as the rest.

The trick to making a good enemy is NOT to tell us he's some vast, invincible foe, but to SHOW us how they're dangerous, even if they don't have a fraction of the power. If a new character were introduced that knew that Harry and his friends had entered the game, and used that information to blackmail them while sabotaging their operation and destroying their hard work piece by piece, and who was just powerful enough to fight one of them head-on but with the cunning to run away when things got tough, THEN you have a real enemy.

I don't recommend reading this fanfic.


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