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Reviews Film / Assassins Creed 2016

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Thimblerig Since: Mar, 2015
01/03/2017 03:11:08 •••

I did not enjoy this movie.

It did not, for me, pass the 'Would my time be better spent cleaning toilets?' test.

Halfway through, I started pretending it was a foreign-language film without subtitles which helped, slightly. There's some marvellous acting talent with some very bland lines. I hope Cotillard, Irons, and Fassbender were paid well, because I do not think they will look back on this with pride in their craft.

Moana made a better argument for the occasional necessity (and pitfalls) of 'antisocial' behaviour. And reconciling with your ancestors, it did that better, too.

But hey, the cinematography was very pretty.

And if you enjoyed yourself, good for you.


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