Awesome Moments: One of the dinosaurs bursts into the halfway house and kills Oscar before Fred bursts through the door from another room and unloads several shotgun shells into the dino's face!
Ensemble Dark Horse: A random gang-member who's dressed like some kind of French resistance fighter caught the eye of Mike and the Bots, who gave him a bit of dialogue.
Future Wax. Due in large part to how the title scrolls onto the frame in the opening (left-to-center zoomed in, then pulled back so the title fills the frame) so that the "r" is the very last letter to be revealed. Due in larger part to the bots misreading the title as one of the jokes on the MST3K episode.
Daniel Bernhardt as “Jean Claude Gosh Darn”.
Fight Scene Failure: The Runaway vs. a forced perspective hand puppet T-rex.
The Runaway hits the first Cyborg with an obviously empty box.
Funny Moments: For a bad movie, there is at least one funny joke during the escaped future slave's description of the cyborg masters to Anne, a former prostitute turned nun.
The Runaway: They want us to do the work! Anne: Yeah. I've known some pimps in my time.
Glurge: The ending has what sounds like a 6 year old girl calling the Teen Troubled Hotline.
"Monsters in the 'hood'" and "Driiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive!"
Crow: Look, how much more can I drive? There's no inherent quantity of driving I can increase! If you want me to go faster, you need to tell me that.
Everything related to the "halfway house for huge guys."
The Runaway calling himself a tool. Yes, yes you are.
During the fight with the cyborg in the "box maze", there's a shot where the Runaway throws an (obviously empty) cardboard box with a hilariously over-the-top "battlecry". And as if that weren't enough, the cyborg punch-deflects the "missile" with a ludicrous car-crash sound effect.
Padding: Tons of it, thanks to the original director turning in a cut that wasn't even an hour long:
Roughly three minutes of the movie's climax is turned into an In Medias ResCold Open, and repeated in full later on.
The opening credits are drawn out to a punishing degree, and mixed with stock footage from an entirely different movie. The end result of this is that it's eight-and-a-half minutes before the film's actual storyline starts.
About halfway through the movie, the Runaway has a rapid-fire flashback of everything that's happened in the plot up until that point, eating up another three minutes or so of screentime.
Poor Man's Substitute: The Runaway, Daniel Bernhardt, is a European martial artist with a thick accent, just like Jean-Claude Van Damme. Doubles as Actor Allusion, as Bernhardt was also the Poor Man's Substitute for Van Damme in the Bloodsport sequels. The MST3K crew refer to him as Jean-Claude Gosh Darn.
So Bad, It's Good: This movie is endearingly incompetent. The crew at Best of the Worst called it "so bad it's awesome" and that the most amazing thing about the film was that adults made it.
The opening text crawl appears to be describing the premise of a much better B-movie than the one we got: time-traveling cyborgs enslaving humans from the past while keeping dinosaurs as bloodhounds and there’s a slave rebellion lead by a Bible-quoting martial artist? Sounds awesome! Instead we get only see the briefest fallout of said slave rebellion. Case of They Wasted a Perfectly Good Plot?
Special Effects Failure: Ironic, considering some of director Anthony Doublin's other credits are as an effects artist.
Oodles. The cyborgs are guys wearing Laser Tag vests and clown make-up, the dinosaurs are puppets, and then there is the news team. To quote Mary Jo Pehl:
"There's a moment in this movie which is kind of heartbreaking. There's a brief scene where a television news reporter is doing a live remote stand- up. His cameraman is using a pretend card-board camera; it's a taped-up box with a lens apparatus taped to it. That made us sad."
The dino puppets look decent enough in some shots and absolutely silly in others. The problem is, they are quite obviously not to scale, resulting in egregious forced perspective shots to make them seem larger and menacing. Plus, the strings used to operate them are glaringly obvious in close-ups.
One of the more inexplicable ones: The Cyborg and dinosaur POV shots make it clear that these enhanced supersoldiers from the future see "considerably worse than humans". Things are either so pixellated as to be completely indistinct (Cyborgs) or simply... red (Dinos).
The first cyborg's white facepaint vanishes between shots when fighting the Runaway.
Servo: Hey, he looks better without makeup!
Crow: Yeah, he's so pretty; he really doesn't need it.
During the climactic church fight, the Runaway's scars disappear and reappear from shot to shot, as Mike gleefully points out.
During the sewer scene, there is a part where the heroes have to cross some sort of Bottomless Pit or the like. Apparently they couldn't even afford a cheap matte shot of the pit as the characters just hug the wall and shimmy along the "ledge" while looking down and pretending there's a pit there.
The alleged Absurdly Spacious Sewer doesn't have any water in it, and some of the walls are made of wood which inexplicably has beams of light shining through the gaps, even though it's supposedly underground.
During the police station attack one of the doors the cyborg breaks through is clearly made of styrofoam! They couldn't afford balsa wood apparently?
And of course the warehouse with row after row of empty boxes, which the actors struggle in vain to make seem not empty. The effects crew inserts some cheesy "crashing metal" sounds each time someone strikes a box, making the whole thing even sillier.
The Cyborg's "laser gun" is very obviously just a flash gun from a camera. When he "shoots" someone, it just flashes, and they pretend to get hurt, and they didn't add any laser beam effects in post-production.
WTH, Costuming Department?: Most of the heroes in the film, for some bizarre reason, all wear some form of plaid clothing which clashes pretty badly with their... what we can only assume is supposed to be "badassery".
