Website / Rage Select

"The classiest video game reviews and playthroughs on the internet"

Rage Select was born from the ashes of The Loading Bar of Spill.com. Operated by Jason Murphy and Jeff, the site in their own words is an "unique site about gaming featuring one-of-a-kind playthroughs, reviews, videos, news, and more." By that they mean constant rambling, foul language, not paying real attention to the game instructions and come up with the most nonsensical questions and dares they can imagine.

That's not to say they don't take their job seriously, and the reviews and podcasts will go in depth about the games and the state of the industry, while adding commentary with their particular brand of humor.

In November, 2014, Jason Murphy stepped back from the site to focus on personal matters, returning monthly for special episodes. John Sitton, Grant Davis, and Aaron D. Alexander have taken his place on the Dojo and the Rage Select Podcast.

Its videos are also hosted on its YouTube channel, here.

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Videos & Podcasts aired:

• The Dojo - Rage Select's regular series, usually featuring the latest games (or whatever they happen to have on hand at the time). Usually airs daily from Monday to Thursday.
• Indie Friday - Similar to The Dojo, but features a random indie game instead of the more mainstream titles of The Dojo. As the name indicates, it airs on Fridays.
• Sequential Saturday - A variation on The Dojo where Jason and Jeff play a game to completion. It airs on, well, Saturdays.
• Sparkle Fandango - A show featuring Allison Murphy (Jason's wife) along with their friends Kayla Kromer and Kristin A. Hogan. Currently on hiatus.
• Sunday Streaming - The replacement show for Sparkle Fandango. A three-ish hour stream of a different game each week. Usually hosted by Jeff and Kayla.
• Super Awesome Video Game Show That is Totally Serious and We're Paying Attention and Everything. For Reals. - A tutorial show with Jeff and John Sitton of Geek Bombast. The two take a (slightly) more serious approach, focusing on helping new players get good at certain games, while also looking at early access titles. It airs on an infrequent basis, usually twice a week.
• The Rage Select Podcast - A weekly podcast discussing the latest gaming news and responding to fan emails, hosted by Jeff and Jason. Former Loading Bar members Kevin J. Baird and Nick Hodges also participate on occasion, along with the rest of the Rage Select crew.

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The site provides examples of:

• Achievements in Ignorance: Any time the RS crew makes any progress in any game, ever. They actually prefer it that way, as having nothing to rage at puts a cramp on their humor.
• Butt-Monkey: Jeff himself. He's constantly teased and/or abused by everyone around him. For example, one of the site's most popular running gags is the phrase "Jeff Can't Close". It's a reference to an episode of the Dojo where Jeff failed to "close" with a prostitute. In GTA V.
• Cloud Cuckoolander: Kayla shows herself to be one during an episode of Snuggle Fandango, when a listener asked how to make their video game show unique. Her answer? Pulling out some chocolate pudding and smearing it all over her face.
  • In-Universe, Gary Marzipan and the aptly named Loco Steve are clearly not all there, either. Both occasionally border on Ax-Crazy.
• Cursed with Awesome: Jeff often bemoans the fact that he has to play video games for a living. Unfortunately, this means that it's hard to take him seriously when he complains about the actual problems his job presents.
• Fan Community Nickname: The Select Few, or the Ragers/Ragettes. They haven't really made a decision.
• Four-Temperament Ensemble: Jeff is melancholic, Jason/Allison is/are choleric, Grant is phlegmatic, and Aaron/John is/are sanguine.
• Halloween Episode: One week of October 2013 was dedicated exclusively to horror games, and "The Dojo" was re-named "The Asylum".
  • This has since become an annual tradition.
• Happily Married: Jason and Allison. Their shared love of punk rock (and punk attitude) occasionally make them look like an Outlaw Couple...if it weren't for their equally passionate love of comic books.
• Manic Pixie Dream Girl: Played with. The women of Sparkle Fandango come off as this at first glance, with their multi-colored hair and love of puppies/punk rock. However, Kayla is a schoolteacher, and from the way people talk about Allison, you would think she's a real life Femme Fatale.
• The Nicknamer: The guys will often re-name the characters of the games, so much that they become a running gag and end up referencing them in other videos and podcasts.
  • SCP-173 from SCP – Containment Breach became Mr. Peanut.
  • John Marston from Red Dead Redemption: Undead Nightmare became Gary Marzipan, they also named his many, many horses (Dr. Dick Johnson, Ron Perlman Horse, Dongshadow, Oprah Moneyshot, the many reincarnations of Joey Ramone, the long lost Greedo).
  • Batman throughout their various runs on the Arkham games has taken the name Loco Steve.
  • Starkiller from the Force Unleashed 2 became Douche Vader.
  • Naked Snake aka Big Boss from Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater became Nathan Snake.
• Puppet Shows: A variation, the playthroughs will often start and end with a small skit of Jeff and Jason voicing puppet versions of themselves.
  • As of 2016 the skits have been retired.
• Refuge in Audacity: Their usual MO of humor.
  • Jason in particular. Some examples: proposing a "leash-free retard park", and demanding that any and all people with body odor be placed in concentration camps. Extra points go to the last joke for being told on the Geek and Sundry podcast, during South by Southwest.
• Revolving Door Casting: Since Jason's departure and limited appearances, Jeff hosts the episodes with different people every week.
  • In true LEOG fashion, the cast of Sparkle Fandango often varied between episodes. Sometimes it was Allison and Kristen, Allison and Kayla or all three. Other episodes have featured Jeff, Jason, Grant, John Rubio and Griffon Ramsey.
• Running Gag: The guys brought many of the jokes and characters they created during the days of The Loading Bar.
  • The unofficial mascot of the site, Gary Marzipan, which is a renamed version of John Marston from their playthrough of Red Dead Redemption, along with his long lost horse, Greedo.
  • Jason constantly referencing a "porno werewolf" whenever wolves appear in a game.
  • Shouting "Hashtag Jeff Can't Close", whenever, well, Jeff can't close.
  • Jeff's unhealthy obsession with Dark Souls.
  • Grant's hatred of JRPG's.
  • Aaron likes violence. Maybe a little too much.
  • Jeff and Jason, at some point, made up a deity called Dongacles, the Dong Lord. Since then, nearly every fan email read on the Podcast has included an extraordinarily graphic sign-off, usually referencing a certain part of the male anatomy, or every part of the male anatomy.
• Sixth Ranger: In a sense, Brian Brushwood. Also Grant in the early days.
• Spiritual Successor: To the Loading Bar, which has a very similar format to Rage Select. Several former Loading Bar members have participated in Rage Select's podcasts.
• Unwinnable Training Simulation: The "Kobayashi Murphu", in which Jason Murphy (and Brian Brushwood when he guest stars) will question Jeff with a hypothetical scenario in which he can take a reward if he goes through a grueling test, often of sexual nature.
  • During one of these back on the Loading Bar, Jeff admitted he'd have sex with a Mantis Lady. Despite being more than three years ago, Jason still taunts him about it.