Web Video / Sgt Ducky

Demonetized

Describing himself as the "Internet’s Cunniest Funt", Sgt Ducky is an Irish comedy YouTuber whose videos are filled to the brim with dirty humour, lack of subtlety and surprising heart.

His video output can be split up into two sections:

Firstly, his rant videos, with most of them being released before he managed to make YouTube his full-time job, which mainly consist of vulgar and dark humour, with the odd tear-jerking moment thrown in for good measure. That makes you wonder if you're really watching an over the top persona or the escapism for a late-twenty something, living an unfulfilling life and suffering from feelings of anger, resentment, depression and possibly suicidal thoughts...that’s before he makes ten sex metaphors within the span of a minute.

Secondly, his story-time videos, with most of them being released after Ducky made YouTube his full-time job, in which he is noticeably happier. He dials back the vulgar humour (by his standards), and introduces so many new characters that you’d think he was aiming for a cinematic universe.

You can find his channel here.

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Sgt Ducky's videos contain examples of:

• All Just a Dream: "The SCARIEST Experience Of My Life!" has Ducky recall one night where an unseen figure unlocked his door (somehow, given that the keys were in the inside keyhole), and stood at the foot of his bed while breathing heavily. Upon calling up his mother after sitting in the kitchen all night armed with a butter knife, he was told he was experiencing Sleep Paralysis.
• Anger Born of Worry: On his 14th birthday, Ducky shared a whole bottle of Vodka with his girlfriend and a male friend who stole the Vodka in the first place. When Ducky's angry brother found him later that night, Ducky was outside a fast food place with his jeans unzipped and completely disorientated from the alcohol. While Ducky explained to the audience earlier that he tried to urinate in a bush and was simply too drunk to rebutton his jeans before blacking out outside a takeaway. His older brother, on the other hand, had every right to believe that his 14-year-old brother was sexually assaulted and spent the entire time interrogating him on where he got the alcohol from and where he was for the past few hours.
• Animal Lover: Ducky has owned dogs and rats, and at one point treated a mouse living in his apartment as a roommate. He also once said that he only cares about giving money directly to a homeless person if they have a dog.
• Anti-Hero: Ducky can be a well-intentioned yet unscrupulous character since he openly makes fun of everyone, is more offended by the fact that Tony betrayed his friends and turned a blind eye to Tony's other affairs, and he's got a profane and vulgar sense of humour. Despite all of this, Ducky values loyalty above all else and appears to have had some character development since his first video. As he now makes Tony the butt of the joke and constantly portrays him as a jerk for betraying Sarah, his then-girlfriend, by drunkenly making out with Emma at the house party.
• All Men Are Perverts: Discussed, in What Men Hate About Woman Ducky claims that all men are this.
  "'Too skinny for my tastes'?! We don't fucking have tastes! We'd get up on a gust of wind if we could find purchase!"
• Asshole Victim: Discussed, when Tony returned from the hospital and explained why he had to walk home, Ducky tells the audience that neither he nor his friends felt too bad for him because of what happened during the party since he nearly got them all arrested. The incident where he got vomited on during a house party is famous among the boys because they saw it as divine punishment from the god of brotherhood for betraying his oath to get their friend laid.
• Bait-and-Switch: In The Dawn of Sean, he repeatedly implies that he, PJ, and Heff were drug users due to the repeated references to cocaine. In Heaving in the Evening, Ducky reveals that they weren't using drugs and they were actually referencing caffeine. As Ducky points out, it's way too difficult and costly for Ducky and his friends to actually buy drugs.
• Berserk Button:
  • For Ducky,
    • Stupid people and stupid questions because of his history of working in retail.
    • His ex is also another one because she cheated on him multiple times while they were dating and she made him take her to an expensive restaurant. Ducky wants all memories of her erased and he had to rename her as "Margot Robbie" because he kept seething with rage whenever he wrote her actual name in the script.
  • For PJ, experiencing any type of difficulty while playing a video game can lead him into a rage... despite the fact that he chooses to always play games at the hardest difficulties.
• Big Brother Instinct: Ducky's older brother might make jokes at Ducky's expense but when he was 19-21 years old, he found a 14-year-old Ducky drunk and in a compromised state outside a local takeaway. Ducky's brother immediately drove him home and interrogated him on what happened and how he got drunk.
• Big Eater: Connie, according to Ducky.
  "She's obsessed with food. I swear, she fantasizes more about food than men. Like, my fantasy is a mixed-race threesome, hers is being left alone for three hours in a fully-stocked bakery. Don't let her good looks fool you - inside her beats a heart of pure diabetes."
• Book Dumb: Ducky is actually quite intelligent about the topics he wants to talk about but frequently explains how he performed badly in school due to a lack of interest.
• Disappeared Dad: It's revealed that Ducky's dad wasn't around when he was growing up, and a video on his second channel has him describe it as "more or less a one-night stand that went wrong".
• Emasculated Cuckold: Ducky reveals that one of his exes, named "Margot Robbie" in the video, cheated on him multiple times during their relationship and had more partners than he realised. Obviously, Ducky hates her so much that he renamed her so he doesn't get enraged at the sight of her name.
• Enraged by Idiocy: Ducky believes that a majority of customers don't have the best social skills, he recalls one moment where a customer called the store he worked at just to ask if it's the place they're looking for.
• Equal-Opportunity Offender: Ducky's style of humour is to make fun of everyone and it consists of lewd and vulgar humour.
• Everyone Has Standards: Ducky may have a raunchy sense of humour and a vulgar dialect to match but he draws a line at treachery and causing genuine physical and emotional damage.
  • Despite his unflattering portrayal of "Turncoat Tony", he did save the latter's life with his friends when Tony overdosed on cocaine during a house party.
  • He hates his ex, Margot Robbie, for having multiple affairs behind his back and the mere mention of her name is enough to get him seething with rage. The night Emma threw up on Tony after he betrayed Dan and the lads by breaking the pact to get Dan laid will live on in infamy with the boys.
  • While talking about his old friend/classmate John, he explained how he figured out that the boy was gay because of a moment where John awkwardly made a comment about the hottest girl in school. The fact that John came out on his 21st shows that Ducky kept this discovery to himself until John came out when he was ready. What makes this more important is that homosexuality was criminalised in Ireland until 1993, making it quite heartwarming that Ducky would keep this sort of secret to himself until John was ready.
• Existential Horror: His retail videos reveal that living a boring, unsuccessful life as nothing but a retail worker is Ducky's worst nightmare.
• Fan Boy:
  • Ducky's videos are filled to the brim with video games, movies and TV show references.
  • He made a whole video on the shortcomings of Game of Thrones season 8's shortcomings.
• The Friend Nobody Likes: Tony is depicted as one as he gets the most negative portrayals in the videos.
  • Tony betrayed the boys and cheated on his girlfriend before getting vomited on by Emma immediately afterwards. During the party, Ducky and his friends decided to help their new friend Dan have sex with Emma because he hasn't had sex in 2 years and they felt bad for him. After failing the first time, Tony was asked to distract Emma while they prepped Dan for a second chance but Tony started making out with her instead. While they were trying to cheer up Dan, Emma threw up on Tony while they were kissing and it apparently got in his mouth. From then on, that moment was seen as evidence why you should never break a pact with the lads.
  • In The Head Casey, he overdosed on cocaine during a party and had to be taken to hospital (where he then had to walk home for 7 hours after his recovery because his phone ran out of battery and he had no money for a taxi). Nobody felt too bad for him because Tony nearly got everyone arrested because the police came to the house to investigate the incident.
• Gay Best Friend: Subverted, Ducky's secondary school friend, John, was gay but either didn't know it at the time or didn't completely out yet until he was 21.
• Generation Xerox: Ducky's dad was never around, having either abandoned him or Ducky was a product of a one-night stand. Like his father, Ducky is a ladies-man who hates the idea of being a dad.
• Groin Attack:
  • A more gradual variant, Ducky has an anecdote where he scratched his balls while going to the toilet the evening after preparing and eating a homemade spice bag, mistakenly thinking that the oils from chillies can be washed off with soap. He ends up with "spicy balls" for an agonizingly-long 45 minutes, which Connie doesn't hesitate to laugh at.
  • Connie's cute-couples-schtick, according to Ducky, is to randomly backhand him in the junk (or worse, barely miss then turn it into a flick).
• Guilty Until Someone Else Is Guilty: During a house party, one of his friends started overdosing on drugs and they had to call an ambulance, where the police came over as well because they had to investigate how these guys got drugs in the first place. Even though Ducky insisted that it was just flour, the cops very nearly arrested them all under false charges.
• Hair-Trigger Temper: Ducky is quick to anger when it comes to his retail stories as he gets enraged by the sheer stupidity of customer requests and complaints.
• Hurricane of Puns: Sean and Shaun the horses cause The Boys to occasionally lapse into chains of horse puns when bringing them up in conversation.
• Ironic Name: Ducky is a British term for endearment and is also used as a term for gay men. While Ducky does enjoy making gay jokes (i.e. gay Tuesday), he's a notorious womanizer. Ducky is also from Southern Ireland, where their relationship with the UK can only really be described as, in the briefest of terms, tense ^note  Ducky is believed to have been born the very late 80s (1988-89 specifically) and grew up during The Troubles as the Provisional Irish Republican Army was fighting for independence from England. The war didn't end until 1998, where Ducky would have been 9 or 10 years old.
• Last-Second Word Swap: Narrowly dodges demonetization in his second Life Hack video by talking about, "Laying in bed thinking about Jessica Nigiri blowing the d-d-d-dandelions in a meadow! (hohh, that was close!)"
• Leprechaun: According to one of Ducky's guides to Ireland, Leprechauns are actually real, they're just called "Travellers".
• Mr. Fanservice:
  • Heff is regularly seen shirtless and his most famous deed is having spent nearly an hour having loud sex (much to the ire of Ducky and PJ).
  • Ducky's older brother is portrayed as more muscular than the other characters and is drawn nude in one of the stories.
• Ms. Fanservice: Ducky's ex-girlfriend, Sinead's avatar is dressed in skimpy, provocative clothes and is shown having sex with Ducky in The Numbing Johnny Story.
• Once Done, Never Forgotten: Tony getting thrown up on by Emma after betraying the boys will never be forgotten and it has long since been immortalised as a cautionary tale on why you should never betray your friends. Future videos would also further vilify Tony by showing his girlfriend reacting to his affair.
• One-Steve Limit: Downplayed when Ducky and his roommates noticed there are two horses in the yard, and made an in-joke out of naming them "Sean" and "Shaun", then holding casual conversation as if they could tell the difference between the two through spoken word alone.
• Perfectly Cromulent Word: "Blobulous", in reference to how Ducky suddenly realized he was getting fat.
• Pink Is Erotic:
  • In the video "A Lesson In Back Splash - School Bants", Ducky's crush, Nene, is introduced in a provocative pose against a blue background with pink/magenta stars flashing the background.
  • In the video "Rebound & Letdown", Ducky's rebound girl, Mia, is introduced against a pink background and Ducky's friends spent a few seconds gawking at her until Ducky yelled "Dibs!" so he can chat her up.
• Potty Emergency: 14-year-old Ducky ends up in this situation after his first time getting drunk (after throwing up out of the window, no less). He ends up falling asleep on the toilet.
• Quacking Up: Ducky's avatar is a green Duck and the animated universe consists of ducks, with the exception of a few characters where they are instead depicted as humans.
• Seasonal Rot: Discussed in-universe with his video on the eighth season of GameOfThrones
• Separated by a Common Language: One shows up in "When I Got Fat Behind My Back!"
  "I'm sure it had nothing to do with drinking at least three cans of Monster a day, ordering so much takeaway the delivery driver knew me by name, and smoking more fags than the 1920s mafia. In the UK and Ireland, we call cigarettes "fags", I wasn't implying I used to suck off twenty queens a day...though there's probably worse ways to spend an evening. Watching Love Island springs to mind."
• Soul-Sucking Retail Job: Ducky worked many of these before becoming a full-time youtuber, hence his seemingly-endless collection of stories about stupid customers.
• Sound-Effect Bleep: Out of concern for being demonetized, Ducky often covers up profanity with a duck quack.
• Spared, but Not Forgiven: For betraying his trust, having multiple affairs, and making him pay €134.00 at a place he really didn't want to go to in the first place, Ducky's ex is still hated deeply by Ducky and he makes it clear that he will never forgive her. As evident by how he had to rename her as "Margot Robbie" so he doesn't have to write her name down and so he doesn't start frothing at the mouth with rage.
• Transparent Closet: Ducky, at 15, managed to piece together that John was gay, long before he came out at 21, due to John being soft-spoken, non-competitive with the other boys, and having female friends. For Ducky, the biggest hint was the awkwardness of him expressing sexual attraction to a female.
• Treachery Is a Special Kind of Evil: Ducky's main virtue is loyalty and he shows a special kind of anger and hatred towards two people in his life for significant acts of betrayal. One of his commandments in the bro code is to never betray your friends to their girlfriends and never date their ex or current girlfriend.
  • His ex betrayed him by having affairs with multiple men even after Ducky took her to an expensive restaurant, to this day, the mere mention of her name is enough to inspire rage in Ducky as he had to rename her in one of his videos.
  • Ducky has some resentment towards Tony for betraying the boys at the same time by making out with Emma at a house party while they were trying to help their new friend, Dan. Future videos would also have Tony's girlfriend finding out about the affair or Tony being humiliated for it. While Ducky has still maintained a friendship with Tony since those incidents and he's honour-bound by the bro-code to never completely betray him, Ducky still shows some bitterness towards Tony for having to clean up after him and for the trouble Tony kept bringing to Ducky and the boys.
• You Need to Get Laid: While at a house party, they get to know Dan and discover he hasn't had sex in several years and was feeling a little defeated by it. Feeling sorry for the man, Ducky and his friends try to hook him up with Emma and while they succeed in the pair sharing a bed... Dan was too shy and awkward to through with it. They tried the same plan again but Tony took over instead. Dan did get his own back through karma, Emma was so drunk that she vomited on Tony, allegedly while the two were kissing.

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