The Big List Of Booboos And Blunders / A To G

• "abject" (pitiful) for "object" (a thing, a goal, or to disagree); the case in point was "an abject lesson".
• "Adsorb" and "adsorption" are technical terms used in chemistry; the difference between "absorb" and "adsorb" is explained here.
• "accept" (agree to the existence of) vs. "except" (other than). "Nothing is known except A" means "All that is known is A". "Nothing is known accept A" (which should really be "Nothing is known; accept A") means "No information is available; understand that A exists."
• "access" (permission, liberty or ability to enter) for "excess" (surplus).
• "accommodation" and "accommodating" both have two 'c's and two 'm's.
• The terms "accuracy", "precision" and "resolution" are, as pointed out in a mid-1970s article in British magazine Electronics Today International, often confused with one another; for example, so-called "double-precision" calculations are actually double-resolution, and in a computer exhibition at around that time, one exhibitor advertised a real-time clock board with a "1/100th of a second accuracy"—a meaningless claim, for it failed to specify the interval which that accuracy was obtained over. (Again, they probably meant a "1/100th of a second resolution".) According to the article, if a series of tests are done with an instrument and in each case the result which should have been obtained subtracted from that which was, giving a set of error terms, the accuracy of the instrument is given by the arithmetic mean of those terms, and the precision by the standard deviation. The resolution is the smallest measurable difference.
  • A common illustration of the difference is: fire a gun at a target repeatedly. Your precision is the size of the cluster of holes, your accuracy is how close those holes are to the bullseye, and the resolution is the size of the rings on the target.
• "acronym" as a synonym of "initialism" (or worse, "abbreviation"). An acronym is a new word formed from the initials of a phrase (such as laser); a phrase contrived to form an already-existing word, or the word thus formed, is an acrostic (e.g. MIME); and a bunch of initials which can't be pronounced as a word is just an initialism (e.g. HTML). Note also that while an initialism is an abbreviation, an abbreviation isn't necessarily an initialism (e.g. the British English "mash" for "mashed potatoes"). NASA (NASS-uh) is an acronym; NSA (enn-ess-ay) is not.
  • Sometimes of course it's not clear-cut: the name of the database language SQL can be (and is) pronounced both as an initialism (ess-queue-ell) and as an acronym ("SEE-quill")—sometimes by the same speaker.
• "acute" (intense but lasting a short time) vs "chronic" (lasting a long time). These words are almost opposite but are frequently confused, perhaps due to the both being medical terms.
• "adapt" (change to fit the circumstances) vs. "adept" (competent, skilled) vs. "adopt" (take as one's own)
• "addictive" (causing a physical dependence) for "habituative" (causing a psychological dependence). Marijuana, LSD, Doom, and TV Tropes are all powerfully habituative, but (except in rare cases) none of them are clinically addictive.
• "adjure" (to solemnly command) vs. "abjure" (to renounce or abandon). You adjure someone to abjure something.
• "admits" (owns up to) for "amidst" (among). This could be a simple typo.
• "adoptive" (the active party to the adoption) for "adopted" (the passive party). In Despicable Me, the girls are the adopted children of Gru; he is their adoptive father.
• "adultery" means sleeping with someone while married to someone else. "Adultry" is not a word.
  • Also note that adultery refers only to a married person cheating on their spouse. If you cheat on someone you're dating but not married to, you're a disgusting cheat but not an adulterer/adulteress. What you're guilty of in that case is infidelity (or just "cheating"). However, if you're not married but sleep with someone who is, you are guilty of adultery.
• "adverse" (bad, negative, unpleasant) vs. "averse" (opposed).
• "aesthetic" (having to do with the fine arts or appreciation of same) vs. "ascetic" (following a strict discipline of self-control and denying oneself excess and luxuries). The classic instance of this error showed up in an early Dungeons & Dragons rulebook in the description of the Monk character class. While monks certainly do have fine appreciation on beauty, they are more known of their unworldly lifestyle. "Acetic" (related to vinegar) is also used for either of the above. Even more confusing if you're talking about an Ascetic Aesthetic.
• The verb "affect" (to act on, produce a change) and the noun "effect" (result, consequence) are not interchangeable. There actually is a rather esoteric meaning of "effect" as a verb, however; it means "to bring about."^note Frederick here, o joy, o rapture. Summon your men and effect their capture! Even worse, "affect" is also a technical term in psychology when used as a noun, making it possible to both affect an effect and effect an affect.
• "afterwords" (author's notes at the end of the book) vs. "afterward" (in the time following an event).
• "aid" for "aide"—The first is not just the verb "to aid" but also can mean any inanimate object that helps with something; the second is a person who provides help of one sort or another.
  • "aides" for "AIDS"—just see the South Park episode with Jared from Subway in it for this one.
  • On a related note, it's lemonade, which means "made from lemons", not lemonaid (something that helps lemons). Unfortunately, it is Kool-Aid, which means both halves of the word are spelled wrong.
    • Depending on your point of view, however, Kool-Aid could mean 'something that helps keep you cool,' or 'kool,' in which case only half of it is still spelled wrong.
• "all for not" when what was meant was "all for naught".
  • Similarly, "ought" ("should") for "aught" ("nothing").
• "ain't" when used in conjunction with any personal pronoun but "I". "Ain't" stands for "am not", so "you am not X" is not correct.
  • For that matter, "ain't" is an informal colloquialism and should only be used when trying to convey such informal colloquialism; technically, the above rule is invalid since "ain't" does not conform to formal English speaking rules anyway.
  • The King disagrees.
  • Ain't used as [I] am not, [you] are not, [she] is not or [They] are not are all perfectly acceptable in any dialog in which informal colloquialism is acceptable. Most circumstances that require a more formal tone also proscribe contractions in general. One example is the quote These numbers ain't for fiddlin', attributed (if not confirmed) to professor and astronomer William H. Jefferys, in explanation of the physical constants of the universe i.e. that these constants arrived at their respective values through natural forces (as opposed to by chance, or through the actions of a higher intellect). It started as a contraction of "I am not", and could even be used formally for this purpose for a short time. It was doomed to informal situations afterward (with the unfortunate consequence that "am not" now has no formal contraction), and as long as you're using the anything-goes brand of English, there ain't no problem in using it for other pronouns (or with double negatives, for that matter); hell, it's one of the best words in the language that there is for indicating that you are avoiding being completely formal.
• For those who write fanfic of Tolkien's Legendarium: "Ainur" is plural. "Ainu" is singular. The same goes for "Maiar"/"Maia" and "Valar/Vala". As a rule, if a collective noun ends with "-r", it's plural.
  • Also, "Vala" is masculine. "Valië" is the feminine form.
• "alley" (narrow little street) for "ally" (someone on your side). Example: "And just like that, Neville knew that he had uncovered an alley in the Slytherin House" from "Longbottom's Army" by kerrymdb. The reverse mistake is made as And then there's "allay", which means to put at ease, and "alloy", a mixture of two metals.
  • "allay" can also be confused for "assay". "Allaying" is the act of putting something at ease, whereas "assaying" is the process of testing metals or ores to determine composition. Any confusion is probably due to the existence of the word "assuage", which also refers to putting ill feelings at ease.
• "allusion" (to refer to something) vs. "illusion" (something unreal) vs. "elusion" (the act of avoidance; evasion) vs. "elution" (the process of washing a substance out of a matrix by flushing it with a solvent).
• "aloud" (audibly) for "allowed" (permitted)
• "alot" for "a lot". "A lot" is two words. "Allot", meaning to distribute, should certainly not be used here. "Alot" is not a formally recognized English word at all; the stricter grammarians will demand even "a lot" as two separate words be replaced with something more formal and proper. Actually, the alot is better than you at everything.
• "alright" for "all right", when used in a context such as "The figures are looking all right."
  • The Oxford English Dictionary comments: "There is no logical reason for insisting that all right should be written as two words rather than as alright, when other single-word forms such as altogether have long been accepted. Nevertheless, alright is still regarded as being unacceptable in formal writing."
• "alter" (change) for "altar" (sacrificial table)
• "altitude" (flight height) for "attitude" (personality trait) This one has been intentionally used as a pun. People have been known to tell someone who has their head in the clouds that they "don't like your altitude" on purpose.
  • Although, it is possible for an aircraft to have an adverse attitude (inclination of the three main axes)...
  • An airplane can have an "attitude". "Attitude" is the orientation of an aircraft with respect to the horizon, and expressed as an angle.
  • Altitude indicator is the gauge which gives you your flight height. Attitude indicator is the artificial horizon.
• "altitude" (flight height) vs "height" (vertical distance) vs "elevation" (vertical distance from zero reference point). "Elevation" is the geographic height of ground from sea level (in a case of an airport, expressed as QFE—Field Elevation). "Height" is vertical distance from ground. "Altitude" is the sum of elevation and height (in aviation, expressed as QNH—Nautical Height). Elevation is used to indicate how high an airport or terrain is above mean sea level. Height is used to indicate how high an aircraft is above the ground. Altitude is used to indicate how high an aircraft is above mean sea level.
  • "Elevation" can have a sense of "distance from the ground" (i.e., something more like "height" or even "altitude"), but in this case it is an angle: the target, the observer, and a point on the ground directly below the target form a triangle, and the elevation is the angle at the observer's corner. For the observer's purposes, the point on the ground is represented by the horizon. In this form, "elevation" is combined with "azimuth" (an angle measured clockwise or counterclockwise from some standard direction) to pinpoint the target's position on the sky (as seen from the observer's location).
• "amendable" (easily modified) for "amenable" (agreeable)
• "amateur" vs "dilettante". The former is someone who practises something for the sake of loving it (Latin amare, to love) and may be really, really good on it, but has not yet given up his day job. The later is a "casual practitioneer", who may be good on what s/he is doing but usually isn't.
  • "amateur" vs "newbie". "Amateur" is simply someone who hasn't given up his or her day job [and is not necessarily inexperienced]. A "newbie" may be a professional, but lacks on experience and/or skills.
  • "amateur" vs "professional". The latter has given up his day job and does it for living. The former hasn't. There may be skills difference, but not necessarily.
  • "amateur" vs "amateurish". The former adjective says that the thing described was not done by a professional, the latter says that it wasn't of professional quality (you'd expect better from someone who was getting paid for the result).
• "amount" (uncountable) for "number" (countable). A cake is made from a certain amount of flour, and is cut into a certain number of slices. Referring to "the amount of slices into which this cake is cut" just sound wrong, even though it's a common usage. (You can have a number of peanuts, or an amount of peanut butter. A number of peanut butters would be the subject of a choice between smooth or chunky.)
• "anamorphic" (of distorted shape) for "anthropomorphic" (non-human of humanoid shape). The Disney Wiki's Sugar Rush page applied this malapropism to the game's NPCs. The Animorphs series does not help clear up the confusion.
• "and" for "an"—Usually a typo.
  • Probably a particular type of typo: the finger macro. Particular character combinations are so common that typing part of them subconsciously causes "missing" characters to be added (like "d" after "an", to make the more common "and").
• "ancestors" (members of prior generations of one's family) for "descendants" (members of subsequent generations). It's amazing they could be confused, but it's quite frequent of a mistake. Your great-great-grandchild is your descendant; you are their ancestor. It's impossible for someone to be the ancestor of someone who lived a hundred years before them unless time-travel (or immortality) is involved.
  • It is one of countless mistakes made in The Legend of Rah and the Muggles, and actually one of the milder ones.
  • In some translations of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Dumbledore says that Voldemort is the last living ancestor of Salazar Slytherin. Cue Epileptic Trees...
• "ancestry" (one's family tree) vs. "incest" (sleeping with one's relatives). In certain works it may be possible for one to commit incest with their ancestry, but these two should still never, ever be confused.
• "Anchors away" is not a proper nautical term, but could mean that the anchor is being dropped. The proper term is "anchor's aweigh," which means nearly the opposite of the former—the anchor is being raised and has just reached the point of being supported by the anchor cable but still touching the bottom; the ship is about to leave port.
  • "Anchor's away" could mean that the captain of your team is absent, or you have no one to host your news broadcast. It could also, possibly, mean that the anchor cable has become severed.
• A common error (especially on signs) is to use the wrong conjunction, particularly "and" (intersection) when "or" (union) is the intended meaning. For instance, "Do not consume food and drink in this shop," meaning that it's all right to consume one or the other as long as you're not consuming both. To clarify:
  • "A and B"—both of them at once.
  • "A or B"—either (or both) of them. This can also be phrased "A and/or B" to prevent confusion with the following (especially common in legal documents, where ambiguity is something to be avoided at any cost).
  • "Either A or B"—either (but not both) of them. In computer languages this case is called "A xor B" (eXclusive OR).
    • Depends on the processor, some have it as EOR (6502, ARM, AVR, IBM 1130...).
  • In math, "A or B" and "either A or B" mean two different things. The word "or" does not exclude both choices from being selected (a union), but saying "either A or B" means that picking one specifically excludes picking the other (no intersection). This distinction is actually quite important in logic and law.
  • Alternately, this isn't an error at all, just a difference in parsing. Signs that use "and" this way are seeing "food and drink" as a lexical unit: "Do not consume (food and drink) in this shop", vs. "Do not consume (food) or (drink) in this shop".
• "Android" is a man-like robot in a sense of "male human being". A female human-like robot is a "gynoid". A generic human-like robot is an anthropoid.
• An "anecdote" (a short account of an incident or event) is not the same as an "antidote" (a remedy that counteracts the effects of poison).
• "angle" for "angel"
• "Angle of incidence" vs "angle of attack". Both are concepts of wing or sail aerodynamics, but different. Angle of incidence ("rigger's angle") is the set-up angle on which the chord of an airfoil (wing of an airplane, or boom of a yacht) has been mounted. Angle of attack is the angle in which the airfoil meets the flow of the air, and is dependent of the direction in which the skipper heads the yacht or plane into wind.
• "Annihilate" means to destroy utterly. "anhialate" is not a word.
• "anomalous" (at odds with its surroundings or companions) vs. "anonymous" (nameless or unknown)
• "Anticlimatic" means you're against the weather. The adjective form of Anti-Climax is "anticlimactic."
• "antisemantic" (against words?) for "antisemitic" (against Jews and Judaism)
• "anut" for "aunt". She might be a little odd, but it's truly amazing how many people think their mother or father's sister is "anut".
• "anyway" (however, whatever) vs. "any way" (an indeterminate direction)
• "apidimy" for "epitome," a spelling error from the Internet.
• "appauled" for "appalled". This is an appalling mistake, unless someone named Paul has appalled someone.
• "appalling" vs "appealing". One is something you really dislike and the other is something you really like.
• "appraise" vs. "apprise". If someone wants to be informed about something, they want to be kept apprised. To appraise something is to determine its value, generally to sell it or have it insured.
• "Aragon" (a place in Spain) vs. "Aragorn" (a character in The Lord of the Rings). Spotted in many a LOTR fanfic. The opposite mistake happens too; several history teachers have complained about students referring to Henry VIII's first wife as "Catherine of Aragorn" (which would make sense only in a very strange crossover, possibly one involving a Crack Pairing.)
• "armature" (a wire frame, esp. for clay sculpture) when what is meant is "amateur".
  • Also, note the difference between an amateur (one who engages in an activity for the love of it) and a novice (a beginner or a n00b). Not all amateurs are novices; to the contrary, amateur is related to the Latin amare, to love, so amateurs are often experts in their field. The opposite of amateur is professional (also not necessarily an expert). Until 1988, athletes competing at the Olympic Games had to be amateurs, which meant they weren't being paid for their athletic performances.
    • Note that "amateur" usually carries the implication of being a dilettante or lacking in professional training. Another case of a word having deviated significantly from its Latin root (but see the discussion above regarding amateur vs. dilettante.).
  • A common misspelling of amateur is amature. This one pops up a lot in amateur and novice writing.
    • The correct form of someone is not mature is immature.
• "Armenian" (person from Armenia or the language they speak) versus "Arminian" (follower of Jacobus Arminius — who was not Armenian, despite what his surname might make you think). The latter is rarely seen outside of highly-specific religious contexts, so if it appears in fiction it's almost certainly a mistake for the former. Before you ask: yes, it's possible for an Armenian to also be an Arminian. But it's highly unlikely, since most Armenians belong to a completely different branch of Christianity.
• "aroused" (sexually attracted) vs. "roused" (awakened, usually by jostling). Aroused can sometimes mean "piqued" or "interested", but this is pretty rare nowadays.
• "arthritis" is a disease that causes stiff, painful joints; "arthuritis", if it meant anything, would be the urge to pull swords from stones.
• "artic" (short for "articulated", hinged in the middle, especially of a vehicle and particularly a truck) for "Arctic" (the region surrounding the North Pole). Even worse is the eggcorn "Antartic" (What is this? A truck for ants?) for "Antarctic" (of the South Pole; literally, opposite the Arctic). Note that the pronunciation "Artic" is acceptable for the word "Arctic".
• "Artist" (one who creates) for "artiste" (one who performs). This error is far too common; for instance, it's embedded in the ID3 tag system.
• "ascent" (an upward motion) for "assent" (agreement)
• "assent" vs. "consent", both being words for expressing your approval of something. Generally speaking, you "assent" to an idea and "consent" to a course of action.
  • You may hear people saying that someone "assented" to an action—sometimes this is just plain being incorrect, but they may be trying to express that someone "assented" to the idea behind the action. There are probably more straightforward ways of conveying that, though.
• "asinine" is not spelled with two S's, however much the word "ass" might be in the mind of the person typing it.
• "assume" vs. "presume". You presume something if your belief has some basis; you assume something if it does not. Consider the famous quotation "Doctor Livingstone, I presume". The speaker was looking for the aforementioned doctor and consequently expected to encounter him.
  • "assumption" vs. "presumption". An assumption is something you believe without proof. Technically, a presumption is something you believe is probable, but it's more often used to describe arrogant, disrespectful behaviour.
• "Assure" (to declare with confidence) vs "ensure" (guarantee). The term "quality assurance" would make more sense as "quality ensurance", but that term is hardly ever used (perhaps out of fear people will misinterpret it as referring to some kind of insurance.)
• "atheistic" (not believing in God) for "aesthetic" (related to the beauty of something). IGN's guide to The Movies probably did not mean to say that "[s]creen fades are purely atheistic".
  • Also, 'atheism' is not the same as 'agnosticism'. Atheistic means you don't believe in the existence of a god. Agnostic refers to someone who feels there is insufficient evidence to decide one way or the other. While it is possible to be both, it's also possible to be one or the other.
• "Athiesm" for "Atheism" is extremely common.
  • Also atheist doesn't mean the same as non-religious. They often overlap, but not necessarily.
• "Attorney Generals" is not the plural of "Attorney General." The proper plural form is "Attorneys General".
  • Likewise the plural of "Surgeon General" is "Surgeons General"
  • And the plural of "court martial" is "courts martial"
    • And it's "court martial", not "court marshal"!
  • And it's "passers-by", not "passer-bys".
  • Also, for Brits, it's "Trades Union", not "Trade Unions". Despite how illogical it seems.
  • This is a general principle; nouns and verbs can be plural. adjectives cannot. Thus, for instance, "bureaux-de-change". The practice of placing the noun before the advective typically betrays a French origin for the phrase.
• "aviator" (a pilot) for "avatar" (a physical embodiment of a god, especially in Hinduism, or an icon used to represent a user on a computer system).
• "backpeddling" (selling something in reverse?) for "backpedalling" (retreating).
• "Bacteria" is a plural (of "bacterium"). If you say "bacteria is", then the Biology Police will hunt you down and place your figgin upon a spike.
• A "bad wrap" is poor protection. A "bad rap" is a poor reputation.
• "bald" (having no hair on one's head, or figuratively, bare) for "bold" (brave, daring). Some accents pronounce the two words identically.
  • Related, the expression is "a bald-faced lie", as in, a lie that's so obvious that it can be seen on your face, not "a bold-faced lie" (which would be a lie you tell while putting on a brave face, maybe).
  • And the famous composition by Modest Mussorgsky is "Night on Bald Mountain", which uses a slightly archaic meaning of the word "bald" as a synonym for "bare" (as in, the mountain is just bare rock, no grass, plants or anything).
• "ball" (generally used, as a verb, is a slang term for sex), for "bawl" (crying and wailing).
  • On a related note, to "bawl someone out" is to yell at someone, read them the riot act, etc.; to "ball someone out" is, presumably, to have sex with someone to the point of exhaustion.
  • And "balling your eyes out" implies some vigorous and probably inadvisable activity.
• "balmy" (warm weather) vs. "barmy" (crazy). Just to confuse things even more, "balmy" used to be another spelling of "barmy", but that usage is now outdated.
• "banzai" (an exclamation of excitement or success) vs. "bonsai" (the art of carefully growing and sculpting miniature trees).
• "barbarian" (meaning not civilized) vs. "Bavarian" (meaning from Bavaria, a province—formerly a kingdom—in southern Germany).
• "barbeque" for "barbecue".
  • The dictionary lists both as being correct, though the former is a "variant" or "slang" version, possibly back-formed from the abbreviation "BBQ".
• Don't confuse a barista with a barrister. Only one of these is likely to serve you a skinny latte.
• "barley" (a grain, used to make beer and soups) vs. "barely" ("almost", "by a narrow margin")
• "Barely bare bears barely bear barely bare bears barely bare."
• "barrow" (peddler's wheeled cart, or a large burial mound) for "borrow" (temporarily take or make use of something owned by another person). Or "burrow", a hole or tunnel dug by a small animal, especially a rabbit, as a dwelling or to make a hole or tunnel.
• baited vs. bated. "Bated" is a proper English word (same root as in to abate), and has nothing to with "baited". You can wait for something with bated breath; but only a mosquito, irresistibly drawn by the carbon dioxide in the air we exhale, may possibly know what a "baited breath" is supposed to mean.
• "Beck and call", not "beckon call".
  • In the Star Wars Expanded Universe, a "beckon call" is a remote control which orders the user's spaceship to home in on said remote-control's location using autopilot. The pun is almost certainly intentional. Zahn likes his wordplay, but tends to make it subtle enough not to distract the reader.
  • A beck (noun) is a signal, hence to be at one's beck and call is to be receptive to communications and summons. To beckon is the verb form of beck. A beacon is a locational signal used for navigation, and yes, they're all derived from common Middle English roots.
• "Bedlam" (chaos) vs "Beldam" (somewhat obsolete word for a nasty old lady.)
• "Begging the question" as used to mean "raising the question", as opposed to in reference to the logical fallacy (which does not involve begging or a question).
• A particularly odd one: "Behoove" (to be necessary and appropriate) sometimes gets mangled into "be who of" (meaningless) this article provides an analysis.
• "bellow" (yell, shout) vs. "below" (underneath) vs "billow" (blow up, like sails) vs "bellows" (tool for creating air current).
• "beknighted" (made a knight, carrying a knight or pestered by a knight, perhaps?) for "benighted" (darkened; intellectually or morally ignorant). Probably a deliberate pun.
• "bemuse" (and its forms) vs. "amuse" (and its forms). If your joke bemuses your audience, then they will be scratching their heads in puzzlement, not laughing^note Laughter can follow, for instance when an insane diplomatic message causes bemusement, then derisive amusement. Idi Amin's "diplomacy" was famous for this..
• "besides" (disregarding) vs. "beside" (next to, physically).
• "bespeckled" for "bespectacled." Megane wears glasses, and isn't freckled or otherwise spotted.
• The word "biceps" is used as both singular and plural for "biceps brachii".
• "blond" and "blonde". In French, "blond" is masculine (and therefore used for men) and "blonde" feminine (and used for women). In English, you won't be making a mistake if you follow that rule. Or you can simplify and use "blond" for both (and lose the opportunity for wordplay). Hair, no matter whose, is always "blond". "Blonde guy" is either a linguistic abomination or someone in dire need of gender reassignment therapy.
  • It's the same for "brunet" and "brunette" for brown-haired folks.
  • For unclear reasons, wood is usually "blond" but ale is "blonde".
• "blossom" vs "flower". Technically all blossoms are also flowers, but only blossoms develop into fruits or berries.
• "boarder" (someone who rents a room from you, or someone who is attacking your ship, as in the phrase "repel boarders") vs. "border" (the edge of a country or other political unit)
• "boarding" (getting on a ship, staying in a hotel or school, or long, thin pieces of wood used to build or cover something) vs. "hoarding" (a board used to advertise something, or the act of accumulating something and refusing to give it away). For added confusion, hoarding might well be made of boarding.
• "borne" (carried) vs. "born" (begin living as an independent organism)
  • Further muddied by phrases like "she had borne him a child".
    • Although, of course, the child was borne in her womb for nine months before it was born.
    • And neither one has anything to do with Jason Bourne, or with a city in southeastern Massachusetts.
  • There is a book Airborn (born in the air), a word play on Airborne (lit. carried in the air). One of the characters was born on an airship.
• "bosoms" when referring to a single person. "Bosom" means the upper chest, the breasts or (figuratively) the heart; a woman has breasts, but only one bosom.
• "boson" (subatomic particle) for "bosom" (breasts).
  • Also "bosun", short for boatswain, a supervisory position on a ship similar to that of a sergeant on land. Any fandom involving seafaring will have several fics with bosons running around.
  • "Integral tried hard to not cover her not so small boson."
• "bossism" (the ideology of being a boss?), also for "bosom".
  • Bosoms should always be handled with care.
• "Bought" is the past tense of "buy". "Brought" is the past tense of "bring".
• "Bowl" (open container) for "bowel" (intestine), and vice versa.
• "brazier" (a pan for lighting fires in) for "brassiere" (female underwear, usually shortened to "bra").
• And while we're talking about brassieres, it's best not to confuse them with brasseries (bars that also serve meals, originally a brewery's beer-garden).
• "breaks" (fractures, turns of fortune) for "brakes" (devices for stopping a vehicle)
  • That may simply be an archaism, rather than an error. Victorian reports of investigations into railway accidents almost invariably use "break" to mean a stopping device, hence the "break" statement in many programming languages and the key labelled so on keyboards.
• "breath" (noun) for "breathe" (verb).
• "breath" (air in the lungs) for "breadth" (width).
  • Also, a tiny distance is "a hair's breadth"; "a hare's breath" is the respiration of a large lagomorph.
• A person from Britain is a "Briton", not a "Britain".
• "Bring" (carry toward the speaker or their home) vs "take" (carry away from the speaker or his home). If you bring someone home, they come to your house, if you take someone home, they go back to their own house.
• "broach" (to make a hole in, or the hole itself, or to open a subject for conversation) vs. "brooch" (piece of jewelry)
• For Americans writing Brit Fic: "bullocks" (young male cattle) vs. "bollocks" (testicles). "Cutting off your bullocks" simply means you're no longer providing those calves with financial support.
  • Cutting off a bull's bollocks makes a bullock.
• From numerous Sailor Moon fics: "Burning Mandella". Rei does not ignite the former president of South Africa and throw him at her target. Not even with his name spelled right. This should be, of course, "Burning Mandala" (a Buddhist meditation symbol).
  • Nor does the same happen to William Mandella, the protagonist of the sci-fi novel The Forever War, whose name actually is a misspelling of "mandala" (because his parents chose the name when they married, but ... didn't know how it was spelled).
• In genealogy, a "cadet" branch of a family is descended from a younger legitimate son along the male line. Thus, descendants of a daughter who marries into a different family, or a non-marital son are not considered a cadet branch of that family.
• "Cajones" means "drawers". If you want to say "balls" the term you're looking for is "cojones".
• "calendar" (a means of keeping track of dates) vs. "colander" (a perforated bowl used to strain off liquid from food) vs. "calender" (a machine for glazing paper or cloth). It's hard to imagine a situation where a fanfic writer would actually intend a reference to the last one.
• "caliber" (degree of competence, also a diameter of a bullet or something similarly shaped) for "caliper" (an instrument to measure thickness or part of the brakes on a car). "Man of his caliper" is used far too often. Interestingly, you can use a caliper to measure caliber.
  • And, despite what certain game titles (and episodes of CSI:Miami) might say, it's not spelled "calibur".
    • It should be noted that the name Soulcalibur is a reference to Excalibur. Don't misspell the sword as "Excaliber," or the video game series as "Soulcaliber."
• "callous" (uncaring) for "callus" (hardened skin).
  • Actually, "callous" is the adjective form "callus." (Calloused skin has calluses on it. A callous person is hardened against empathising.)
• "Campaign" (Either a set of military operations, or a political completion) vs "Champagne" (A kind of wine). There's also the obscure word "Champaign", which is a plain or field^note and an American college town named after same, but is usually a typo for one of the other two words.
• "Canadian geese" for "Canada geese". Canada geese are a specific type of geese. Canadian geese would be any geese that happen to live in Canada.
• For horses, using "canker" instead of "canter". A canter is a gait that is a bit milder than a gallop; a canker is a bacterial infection of the foot. Your horse will appreciate you understanding the difference.
• "cannon" for "Canon"—mostly found in reviews. (The Verne Canon is the body of Jules Verne's fiction; the Verne Cannon is a fictional very-large-bore weapon from Castle Falkenstein.)
  • A Kannon is a Buddhist Boddhisattva, sometimes called the goddess of mercy. The company Canon is named after her.
  • The back-cover blurb for Bolos: Honor of the Regiment speaks of them having a "laser canon."
    • Depending on the style of that, laser weaponry could be canon. Laser rifles, on the other hand—what difference could rifling the barrel possibly make to a beam weapon?
    • Most military firearms are now rifled; the ones called "rifles" fulfill a particular role (precision shooting), so a "laser rifle" is probably a reasonable concept. A "laser canon" on the other hand could be a high-tech Badass Preacher.
  • While we're on the subject of the word cannon, another plural mistake—the plural of the singular cannon is still cannon, like with the word sheep. So, the Light Brigade charged down a hill into all of the Russian cannon, not all of the Russian cannons.
• "can" (Am I able to?) vs "may" (Am I allowed to)? Most people do know the difference between the two. Despite this, mixing them up is surprisingly common even for adults. Some dictionaries allow "can" to be used this way, although it's usually noted as informal.
• "cant" (hypocrisy, slang, or a measure of the slope of a banked turn) for "can't" (cannot)—sometimes seen in trope titles. Also "wont" (habit) for "won't" (will not).
  • Follow-up: "cannot" (is unable to) vs. "can not" (is able to refrain from).
• "canvass" (to search thoroughly; often used in the political context to mean "knock on doors") for "canvas" (heavy cotton fabric). The art student paints incomprehensible paintings on canvas but during the daytime will canvass for Barack Obama's campaign.
• While "capeesh" or "capiche" can be acceptable, as the expression itself has become more of an interjection than a word with actual meaning, the original Italian is "capisce." Best translation is "do you understand?"
  "So sit down and be quiet, capiche?"
  <pause>
  "Do you understand me?!"
  "...everything except the capeesh part at the end."
  • This one is a problem, since it stems from a Sicilian colloquialization of the word "capite" in Italian. The Corleones were Sicilian, so, "capisce" became the most common form known to non-Italians.
    • And you know, it's not even really pronounced that way in Italian. Rather than "kuh-PEESH" it's really "kah-PEE-shay."
  • The original Italian is "capisce"... but the word in Italian-American slang is coppish.
• "capricious" (whimsically arbitrary) for "capacious" (having lots of room)
• "caret" (^-shaped cursor or mark for insertion of text into a document) vs. "carat" (tiny unit of mass for gemstones) vs. "karat" (measure of pure gold in a jewelry alloy, ranging from 0=none to 24=100%) vs. "carrot" (orange root vegetable)
  • Measure of gold purity may be also spelled 'carat', but 'karat' (symbol K or kt) is preferable to distinguish it from the unit of mass. Unit of gemstone mass is always spelled with a 'c' however.
• "carrel" (a library cubicle used for private study) vs. "corral" (an enclosure for horses). Neither should be confused with "coral" (the stuff reefs are made of), "carol" (a song of joy), "Carol" (a female name or a hurricane in 1954), "choral" (of a chorus or choir), or "Corel" (a software house).
  • And while we're at it, "CHOral" (adj. meaning of a chorus or choir) is not the same as "choRAL" (noun, a religious melody). In English, the latter is sometimes spelled "chorale," to make the (spoken) distinction plain; the former is not.
• Just about the worst thread hijacking on the EmailDiscussions forum was when one poster posted a thread on cases (of lettering) and one of the less-intelligent posters mistook the thread topic to be classes (of the socio-political kind, hence banned from discussion on EMD). She subsequently got banned for a far more serious breach of the rules, and the thread was locked and a "clean" copy posted in its place; but how she managed to mistake the two words, which are not only totally dissimilar in meaning but aren't even spelled all that similarly, is a mystery to this day.
  • Maybe she thought it was "castes" (rigidly defined social strata) instead of "cases."
• "cash" (money) for "cache" (a stash, possibly of cash).
• Or "cache" for "cachet" (a distinctive quality).
• "Casement" vs "casemate". A casement is a hinged window or door framing: a casemate is an armoured or fortified gun emplacement. Many old battleships had casemate guns on the sides of their hulls - simply because they would have not fitted to be installed on the porthole casements.
• "casual" (informal, unconcerned etc.) vs. "causal" (being or involving a cause)
  • A common extension is "causality" (the cause-effect relationship) vs. "casualty" (someone who got killed in some event, usually). In British English, "casualty" is also another name for "A&E" (the accident and emergency department of a hospital); for example, "Casualty" was the title of a BBC soap opera about an A&E.
• "cater" (to provide people with food) for "kilter" (balance or a nominal status, usually noted when something is off kilter or out of kilter), an eggcorn.
• "cathouse" (brothel) for "cattery" (place containing cats)
• "cavalry" (horse-mounted soldiers) for "Calvary" (place where the Romans supposedly stuck some Jewish carpenter up on a stick) and vice versa. Bugs Bunny mixes them up all the time.
  • That's pretty standard in the American Southern dialect. This is particularly amusing, considering how enthusiastic Southerners stereotypically are about that Jewish carpenter and how they fielded some of the most impressive mounted units in The American Civil War. You'd think they'd be more careful about that particular one.
  • In the rebooted Battlestar Galactica, Starbuck does this at least once when she says, "Here comes the Calvary," which is especially odd when you consider that Caprica shouldn't have had a history with Jesus in it.
• In discussing wars and their endings, know your terms.
  • A "cease-fire", also known as a "truce", is a temporary agreement to stop fighting. It can be as simple as two opposing regiments agreeing to stop fighting for a few hours to gather their wounded.
  • An "armistice" as a formal agreement between the two sides to end fighting in all theaters of operation. It does not mean the war is over, but is often a prelude to permanent peace negotiations.
  • A "peace treaty" is a final end to the war.
  • An "alliance" is an agreement for two or more countries to work together for some purpose, generally to assist one another in time of conflict.
  • Finally, some examples. In World War I, a truce was observed for Christmas of 1914; however, fighting resumed the next day. An armistice went into effect on November 11, 1918. The treaty of Versailles, ending the war, was signed on June 28, 1919 and became effective on January 10, 1920. In World War II, fighting in Europe ended with an armistice on May 7, 1945. The peace treaty with Germany formally ending the war was signed on September 12, 1990 (no, this isn't a typo: it had to wait until East and West Germany were reunified) and went into effect on March 15, 1991. Following the treaty, Germany was formally allied with the U.S., France, Great Britain, and the other NATO members; it was at peace with, but not allied with, the Soviet Union.
• "chaff" (metallic debris used as a countermeasure for radar) vs. "chafe" (literally, to rub the skin raw, but also used metaphorically to indicate impatience or annoyance with some kind of obstruction or restriction).
  • "Chaff" originally meant the seed coverings from grain, which was removed by threshing (hitting it with a stick and throwing it in the air). The radar countermeasure was named "window" and "Düppel" by the Brits and Germans who independently invented it, but its resemblance to the organic material (especially the way it falls and flutters through the air) took over as the Trope Namer.
    • And getting this kind of chaff in your clothes (surprisingly easy to do) will make them chafe for the rest of the day.
• "chaise longue" (a sort of chair) is misspelled in a variety of ways. "Chaise lounge" is the most common one, and somewhat understandable since "lounge" is an English word while "longue" isn't. The most amusing misspelling is "chase lounge", which is not only an oxymoron (if you're being chased, you're not lounging around) but conjures up some interesting images.
  • It would have been much simpler if we simply used the English translation of the French and called it a "long chair", but alas it's too late for that.
  • There's always the "chaste longue".
• "chalked full" for "chock full" (Eggcorn).
  • Conversely, "chock up" for "chalk up".
• For whatever reason "chartreuse" and "puce" are often confused. To wit, chartreuse is a yellow-green color and puce is a pinkish purple color.
• "check" for "cheek".
• Except in the works of Madeleine L'Engle, where It Makes Sense in Context, the word "cherubim" is plural. The singular is "cherub".
• While "Childish" and "Childlike" both mean "resembling a child", the connotations they have are quite distinct. Namely, childish usually means implies, immature, naive, self-centered etc, while childlike implies cute,innocent, guileless etc (they are roughly equivalent to the Manchild vs One of the Kids tropes, respectively). People often incorrectly treat them as synonymous.
• "chord" (notes played together; also, a line segment with both endpoints on a circle) for "cord" (string or wire).
  • Musicians and linguists would rather you referred to "vocal cords" than "vocal chords", because they are cords of tissue that can only play one note at a time. Linguists are less likely to be fussy about it because they know that most use of a language is nothing but a lot of well-established mistakes in the use of an older one.
    • Anatomists may refer to (vocal and) spinal cords or chords; the former is more common but the latter is acceptable. The phylum Chordata consists of those animals (the "chordates") that at some point in their life have a structure (the "notochord") which in vertebrates becomes the spinal c(h)ord.
• "Chow" (food or as a verb, to eat, usually followed by "down"), vs Ciao (Italian for "Hello" or "Goodbye"). Some people spell the latter as the former, likely under the misconception that it's some kind of English slang meaning rather than a proper Italian word that just happens to sound the same.
  • The Chow Chow dog breed is also sometimes known as the "Chow".
  • The chao chowed down on a hotdog.
• A 'Christain' is, presumably, a smudge or mark left behind by a Chri. A 'Christian' is a follower of the teachings of Jesus Christ. Compare 'athiest'.
• "chute" (a slide or duct, as in a laundry chute) misused for "shoot" ("a young growing plant")
  • Bamboo chutes are not something you'd eat, then.
  • "chute" is actually a false friend for Spanish speakers, as "chute" is the subjunctive conjugation for the verb "chutar" which is actually synonymous to "disparar" (shoot) when the object being shot is a toy ball or soccer ball, and the propeller are the shooter's feet.
  • A skydiver will never refer the rescue device he or she abuses as "chute" (short from "parachute"), but as canopy or rig.
• Regarding the CIA, while not an error per se, it's considered extra swanky in espionage circles to refer to intelligence institutions as proper names (as per Coke, Xerox or Ozymandias), hence without the leading article, the as in I worked for CIA during the Reagan years before selling out to KGB. Lay folk will still call it the CIA.
  • Omitting the article is an Americanism. Just about any British-English speaker will always call it "the CIA".
• "circumflex", "^", is sometimes confused with a "tilde", "~", both diacritical marks and, astonishingly enough, sometimes professional linguists make this mistake.
• "click" vs. "clique"
  • Also "clique" vs. "cliche" (which is actually a misspelling of "cliché", though it has become the accepted spelling and spell-checkers recognize the correct spelling as a misspelled word).
    • Never "click" vs. "cliche", though; it seems to be that the problem is that people remember that despite sounding like "click", the word they're looking for is spelled very differently, only they have no idea what that spelling is.
• "clinch" vs. "clench"
  • Unfortunately, these words are largely synonymous. According to a dictionary:
    • clinch means to clutch something tightly; to press your teeth together; to pound down the end of a nail into a hook; or to make an argument definitive and final. It can also mean a boxing maneuver.
    • clench means to pound down the end of a nail; to hold something tightly; to make a fist; or to press your teeth together.
  • Tell that to anyone who's ever clenched a victory (or clinched their teeth, for that matter)
• "cloths" (pieces of cut fabric) for "clothes" (stuff you wear, made out of pieces of cut fabric)
  • Or "cloves."
    • Itself not to be confused with "Clovis" (the first Christian king of the Franks, a city in eastern New Mexico, or a prehistoric culture named after said city).
  • "... and normal people close because he was in his office lab coat."
• "clustered" (gathered in a tightly-packed group) vs. "cloistered" (hidden away from the world)
• "coach" (advise, motivate; or a variety of vehicle, often horse-drawn) vs. "couch" (item of furniture; or adjusting one's choice of words or phrasing for a specific purpose)
• "codecs" (devices or programs for converting analog signals into digital signals and back) vs. "codex" (a book). The Galactic Codex is the Encyclopedia Exposita telling players about the Mass Effect universe; the Galactic Codecs are possibly involved in its communication system.
  • CODEC is an abbreviation for Coder / Decoder not unlike MODEM.
• "collage" (an artform composed of individual pieces of paper assembled into a whole) vs. "college" (where you go after high school)
  • Also, "colleague" (as in co-worker).
• "(Eau de) Cologne" is a fragrance meant to be worn, usually one designed for men, named for the city of Köln, Germany. "Colon" is the lower part of the intestine. "Ode colon" would presumably be a song about (or from) the lower intestine.
  • " Colón" (with the acute, so the stress is on the last syllable) is the name of several cities in different Spanish-speaking countries.
• "Comical" (funny) vs "conical" (shaped like a cone).
• "Complacent" and "complaisant" sound very similar and have the same Latin origin in a verb meaning "to please", but if you are "complacent" you're too pleased with your own work while if you are "complaisant" you're too willing to work to please others. If your spellchecker catches a misspelling in this word, make sure its suggested correction is the right one.
• "Command" and "demand" both mean to order, however command implies the person giving the order is within their rights to do so while demand doesn't e.g "The general commanded his army to attack" vs "The kid demanded his parents give him a new video game"
  • This extends to the idea of either commanding or demanding respect. Someone who commands respect has earned it; someone who demands respect might not have.
• Do not confuse "commander" (one rank below a naval captain) with "commodore" (one rank above captain).
• "common" as a faux abbreviation for "come on". Come on, people, if you must abbreviate it, it's "c'mon". "Common" is a whole other word. A common one, in fact.
  • These people are running no common inn. (although there are common rooms... but that's a whole different use)
• "complex" (consisting of more than one part) vs. "complicated" (consisting of very many parts; sophisticated). This is especially a pitfall in mathematics or computer programming, where "complex" has one very specific meaning; one freeware calculator was claimed to be capable of "complex" calculations (those, involving the square root of -1, where numbers have two parts—a "real" one and an "imaginary" one) but wasn't (obviously the author meant "complicated"), and many of the negative comments on it picked up on this.
  • To add to the complexity, "complex" also has specific meanings in architecture ('a group of inter-related buildings') and psychology ('a core pattern of emotions etc. in the personal unconscious organized around a common theme such as power or status'). So if architect's core pattern of emotions only allowed him to design inter-related buildings, they could be said to have a 'complex complex'. And if this condition was complicated by additional factors, it would be a 'complex complex complex'.
• "compliant" (obedient, agreeable) for "complaint" (expression of dissatisfaction)
• "compliment" (speak well of) vs. "complement" (go well with)
  • Also "complimentary" (offering praise; also, free) vs. "complementary" (being a counterpart of; completing)
• "compose" (to make up) and "comprise" (to contain). This is a confusing one because not only do they sound similar, their meanings are very close but still distinct. They are in fact roughly inverse to each other: to say that the United Kingdom comprises England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland means the same thing as saying that England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland compose the UK; and therefore the UK is composed of England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland, and that England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland are comprised by (=are contained in) the UK. Get it?
• "compromised" vs "impaired". Both mean rendering something less than functional, but a "compromised" system is merely weakened but may still work, while "impaired" system is kaputt for good.
• "compulsion" (being forced to do something or behave in a certain way) vs. "compunction" (a feeling of guilt). One can rob a bank without compunction (without regretting it), and one can rob a bank without compulsion (without being forced to do it). These two should still never be confused.
• "conceded" (surrendered) vs. "conceited" (egotistical).
• "conciseness" (the state of being brief and to the point in your verbiage) for "consciousness" (the state of being aware of the world around you)
• "concur" (agree with) vs. "conquer" (win). You cannot "Divide and Concur".
• "Confection" (a piece of candy, dessert, or other sweet thing) vs "convection" (how heat spreads through a liquid or gas.)
• "confidant" (someone with whom you share secrets; sometimes written with a terminal "e") vs. "confident" (certain of one's ability or course of action)
  • Strictly speaking "confidant" is meant to be Always Male and "confidante" is Always Female (it's one of those weird words with a separate spelling for male and female.) That said, most people just use "confidant" for both nowadays.
• Confucius's name is frequently misspelled (and mispronounced). "Confusius" and "Confucious" are the most common mistakes, but sometimes you'll also see "Confusus" and worst of all "Confusion"(!). That last one is probably the result of a spell-checker's "correction".
• "concave" (curved inwards) vs. "convex" (curved outwards). You can remember this by how a concave object is shaped (more or less) like a cave.
• "concave" (curved inwards) for "conclave" (a private meeting) and vice versa.
• A word's "connotation" is the secondary implied meaning(s) the word carries, e.g., "pale" and "pallid" mean roughly the same thing, but "pallid" is generally considered to have negative implications (such as the person being sickly). A word's "denotation" is simply its dictionary style definition.
• "conscious" (awake, aware) for "conscience" (one's moral or ethical "guiding voice")
• "conscious" (awake, aware) for "conspicuous" (showy, outstanding)
  • "subconscious" for "self-conscious"
• "consul" (a diplomatic envoy or an ancient Roman official) for "console" (a box in which electronic hardware is mounted, or, as a verb, to comfort someone).
• "contemporary" versus "modern". Contemporary means that a person or thing lived or took place at the same time as something else. Modern means that a person or thing lives or has taken place in the present day. For instance, Chaucer is by no means a modern writer, but if we were discussing fourteenth century England, he would be considered a contemporary writer, as he lived during that time.
• "continuous" (adjoining in time) for "contiguous" (adjoining in space). The counties of Kent and of Greater London are not continuous, since the latter is far younger (1922); they are contiguous.
  • An alternate sense of use is that continuous objects form an unbroken whole, whereas contiguous objects are perfectly joined at their boundaries without interruption. An unopened orange has a continuous covering of peel, but each slice inside is contiguous with the ones next to them.
• "continuous" vs. "continual". Both have the sense of being uninterrupted, but the former is one unbroken whole while the latter is a frequent series of distinct events. Last thunderstorm had a continuous gale and continual lightning (cf. "amount" vs. "number" above).
• "convient" is not a synonym for or variant of "convenient". It's just misspelled.
  • Nor is convent (type of monastery, generally all-female)
• "coporial" (not a word) or "corpral" (also not a word; most likely an eggcorn) for either "corporal" (an army rank) or "corporeal" (someone or something that has a physical body).
  • For that matter, "corporal" and "corporeal" have occasionally been confused for each other. Any work featuring the supernatural will inevitably have a fanfic talking about, for example, "corporal apparitions" — meaning ghosts that are more solid than most, not the ghosts of dead soldiers.
• "copyleft" (neologism) for "copyright" (permission to copy). Although "copyleft" is fine as an in-joke among programmers (meaning a license that allows derivative works, but only under the same licensing terms as the original), it's only a name and not a substitute for a proper license spelling out those terms.
• "copyright" is the right to copy works. Trademarks cover the right to use distinct marks in trade. Patents protect inventions and other ideas, in exchange for making them public.
  • Also, don't confuse "copyright" with "copywrite" (create copy, especially advertising copy).
  • Disney has many copyrighted works. The Mickey Mouse ears silhouette is a trademark.
  • Firefox is covered by a "copyleft" license, but the name is trademarked and can't be used for modified versions.
• "coronate" and "coronated" are not words. The words you're looking for are "crown" and "crowned". One is crowned during a coronation ceremony—though only, of course, if one is the King or Queen.
  • Also "crowned" for "invested". The recepient of a lesser honour than kingship/queenship is invested (and the ceremony is an investiture); this mistake was made of Mater in a wiki article on Cars 2.
  • "crowned" is also a colloquialism meaning 'hit over the head', as in "She crowned him with her Frying Pan of Doom". hopefully context would make which meaning is intended clear.
• "coronet" (a small crown) instead of "cornet" (a musical instrument similar to a trumpet; also, a pastry cone, usually filled with whipped cream chocolate; also, a very junior commissioned officer rank—equal to 2nd Lieutenant—in some cavalry units of the British Army). As neither is a particularly common word, fanfiction writers tend to get this one wrong.
• Space Corps Directive #196156: Any officer caught misspelling "corps" as "core" even though they are pronounced the same will be discharged without trial.
• "costume" (clothing or outfit designed to evoke the image of a person or character) vs. "custom" (habit or tradition).
• "costumers" instead of "customers".
  • At Halloween, the costumers see an increase in their customers.
• "council" (a group of people, often a governing body of some sort) vs. "counsel" (advice, advise, or a lawyer).
  • Therefore, unless you are describing someone who keeps a group of advisors imprisoned in his home, the appropriate phrase is "keeping one's own counsel", not "keeping one's own council".
  • Also, "consul", a diplomat, or, in ancient Rome, the highest executive office of the Republic.
  • Don't forget "console", a physical device to operate a computer or play video games.
• On a related note, "councilor", a member of a council, vs. "counselor", an advisor, usually legal, or a therapist.
• "could of" as eye dialect for "could have" or "could've"; similarly "would of" and "should of." If you must render it in dialect, "coulda / woulda / shoulda" will get the point across and confuse fewer people.
  • Depends on the dialect. Some people do actually say, clearly and distinctly, "could of", and "coulda" would not be an accurate representation.
• "could care less" as a replacement for "couldn't care less". Here the author is writing the exact opposite of what is meant (which may be either a mix-up of one's words, or using Sarcasm Mode). Saying you "couldn't care less" is analogous to saying that things "couldn't possibly be worse"—in other words, in the former case, you don't care at all, and in the latter case, things are as bad as they can possibly be.
  • "Could care less" is technically "correct" in US English. That said, it still makes no sense whatsoever, as David Mitchell explains here. (Various rationalisations have been offered, such as that saying "could care less" has an implicit "...but it would take enormous effort". Well, perhaps. It still originated simply as a mistake.)
• The term is "coup d'état"—from the French, literally "strike of the state," and either uncapitalized or with a primary "C" capital at the start of a sentence—not the eggcorns "coup de tat" (meaningless), nor "cou de tête" (neck of head?), nor anything else. Ever. Similarly, "coup de grâce" (mercy strike), not "coup de gras" (a blow to the fat, apparently). Nor of course "coup de grass" (a French lawnmower).
  • "Coup" is pronounced "koo", not "koop". If you pronounce it "koop", you're essentially saying "henhouse of the state".
• "cowtow" (towing a cow?) for "kowtow" (to be obsequious to someone).
• "crawler" for "cruller". This is a wonderful eggcorn, but I'd rather have a donut than something that creeps on the ground any day.
• "crinching" for "cringing"
• "Crony" is most often used as a synonym for Mook, such as "that thug and his cronies". It actually just means a long time friend and doesn't inherently have any negative connotations.
  • However "cronyism" is the appointment of friends and associates to positions of authority, without proper regard to their qualifications, and does have negative connotations.
• "cubical" (shaped like a cube) for "cubicle" (a box in which to work, change clothes, go to the toilet etc.)
  • "Cubicle" actually has nothing to do with cubes, as it turns out, although many cubicles are somewhat cubical.
• "Cue" (a signal to do something, especially for an actor) vs "queue" (a line, as in the kind you wait in.)
• "Cumber bun", an eggcorn for "cummerbund" (the pleated sash-like covering that goes around your waist when you wear a tuxedo).
  • The name of the actor Benedict Cumberbatch occasionally gets eggcorned as the latter!
• "cumin" (a plant with aromatic seeds used in cooking) for "coming" (to be arriving somewhere or having an orgasm), probably a consequence of chatspeak plus overactive spellchecker.
• Curaçao (koor-a-sow, rhyming with "cow") is an island at Caribbean, "Curacoa" looks like someone is attempting to find cure for a coa.
• "dammed" (said of a watercourse that has been blocked to form a lake) for "damned" (having had one's soul condemned to Hell)
• But "dammit", rather than "damnit", as an informal form of "Damn it".
• "dampening" (making damp) for "damping" (reducing movement). If you want to stop inertia from turning the crew of your spaceship into chunky salsa, you should use inertial dampers, which would damp inertia. Inertial dampeners utilize the resistance of mass to force to moisturize an area.
• "dander" (to lose your temper, in the phrase "get your dander up") vs. "dandruff" (a skin condition affecting the scalp) vs. "gander" (a male goose). If you get your gander up, you wake a goose. If you get your dandruff up, you get a lot of dead skin cells on your scalp. But note that "animal dandruff" is called dander.
• Datum is the singular of data. "This data is" is wrong; it should really be "these data are" or "this datum is". "Data point" is however an acceptable synonym for "datum", especially in technical writing.
  • Unless you treat data as a mass noun, which is acceptable in informal usage. (Even then, the Brits use plural pronouns when referring to mass nouns: "On the advice of James Bond, MI-6 have decided to protect you.")
  • If you want to describe your data points as a collection of individuals rather than as an aggregate, there is the plural form "datums" (analogus to "people"/"persons"). Strictly speaking "data points" is a synonym for "datums".
• "dawn" for "sunrise". Dawn is actually the twilight period before sunrise, just as the twilight after sunset is dusk.

• "dead beet" (a no-longer-living root vegetable) for "deadbeat" (a lazy person, or one who defaults on debts).
• "dead metaphor" (a former metaphor which has become literal, such as "electric current") should not be confused with "stale metaphor" (an overworked metaphor, such as "at the end of the day, the bottom line is, use of clichés should be avoided like the plague").
• "dead wringer" (deceased twister of soaked cloth and/or poultry necks), an eggcorn for "dead ringer" (a virtual twin of another person).
• "deafening" (literally "making someone deaf", but almost always means "very loud" instead) vs. "defending" (protecting). At least one fic contains the phrase "The silence was defending" when the writer means is "The silence was deafening".
• "debait" for "debate". OK, maybe some people are too eager to enter a debate, letting their hobby horse trample all over it, but "debaiting" as a method to prevent this sounds rather fishy.
• "debase" (humiliate, degrade, or corrupt) for "disabuse" (to free from a falsehood or misconception).
• "debouch" (to emerge from a confined space into a wide, open area) vs. "debauch" (to corrupt; to indulge in excessive sex, alcohol or drugs). The former word is so unusual that if it appears it's almost certainly a typo for the latter.
• "decapitate" (to behead someone) vs. "incapacitate" (to render unable to do something). If you're decapitated, you'll definitely be incapacitated, but these words should never be confused.
  • "decapacitate" is a (rarely used) synonym for "incapacitate", but it's such an uncommon word that if it ever appears, the author has probably mistaken it for "decapitate".
  • "decapitate" (to behead someone) is not the same as "amputate" (cut off a limb by surgical operation). Make sure your surgeon knows the difference.
• "defamed" (damaged someone's reputation) vs. "deformed" (adj. misshapen; v. having made misshapen). The Corrupter may have deformed your character (made you a worse person), but usually what is meant is someone defamed your character (spread lies about you).
  • Nor is it "defecation of character", even if you feel that they are shitting on your good name.
• "definatly" is not a word, but an extremely common misspelling of "definitely" (see below).
• "defiant" (disobedient) for "definite" (certain). This seems to be the fault of the misspelling "definate" combined with misguided spelling checkers.
• "define" (to state the meaning of something) vs. "deify" (to make a god). Probably a spellchecker is to blame for this, since the former is a much more common word than the latter.
• "delusion" (a belief in something that isn't real) vs. "illusion" (a deceptive appearance or impression). The phrase is "labouring under a delusion".
• Special note for illiterate authors of Buffy fanfic: It's "demon," not "deman" or "deamon". Or "daemon/daimon" if you go the Gratuitous Latin/Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe route.
  • However, if you're writing His Dark Materials fanfic, it's "dæmon", not "demon" (or "daemon").
  • Also, don't confuse any of these with "Damon", which is a rather uncommon given name. (A variant of Damien/Damian, perhaps.)
  • Daemons are programs that act as servers. Or monsters based on those programs.
  • "DaiMon" is a Ferengi title similar to "Captain".
• A delimiter establishes the boundary (or limit) of something. Supposedly, a delimeter measures delicatessens.
• "dependent" vs. "dependant" is actually a case of Separated by a Common Language. In British English, "dependent" is the adjective (the state of depending on something) and "dependant" is the noun (one who depends on another). In American English, "dependent" is used for both and "dependant" isn't a word.
• "depilated" (stripped of hair) for "dilapidated" (said of a building that is in danger of falling down). It's a rare building that even needs depilated, but many are dilapidated.
• "deride" (mock; ridicule) vs. "derive" (get an idea, etc. from something) vs. "deprive" (take something away from someone). If you deride a book, you have a low opinion of it. If you derive an idea from a book, you take inspiration from that book. If you're deprived of a book, someone refuses to let you read it.
• "desert" (noun: an area of dry land; verb: to abandon something) vs. "dessert" (the sweet course of a meal). Neither should be confused with "desert" (noun: something deserved), spelled like the dry area but pronounced like the sweet, and seen mainly in the phrase "just deserts."
  • NUUUÑÑÑEZZZ!!!
• "Deva" (a supernatural being from various Eastern religions) vs "Diva" (a female celebrity, usually said with negative connotations.)
• "devise" (verb, = to build or create; also to leave something to someone in your will) for "device" (noun, = gadget).
• "devise" for "divine" (in the sense of determine or discover, as in "to divine someone's motive"; this is the sense of the word as used in "divining rod")
• "dice" is plural. You cannot have a dice, or roll a dice, or anything. The singular is "die". "Rolling a dice" is like "walking a dogs".
• "diety" for "deity". A deity is a god, diety is not a word (but it looks like a way to lose weight).
  • God Lite, now with 30% less Hell And Damnation! Easier on your conscience! (Sounds like Episcopalianism!)
• "different from" (correct) vs. "different to" (nonstandard) vs. "different than" (utterly wrong).
  • If you get confused, look at it in terms of motion. If you strip the word "different" down to its Latin roots, it means "bringing away" ("-ent" usually more-or-less equals "-ing".) So if, say, Neon Genesis Evangelion and other Humongous Mecha series are different, the reason is that they're diverging, moving away from each other, Evangelion is going off on its own, etc. And you can't diverge to something, or move away than it. So it has to be "from."
    • Taking the same perspective with the opposite concept, things can be similar to each other, not similar from, because they're converging, or moving toward each other.
    • It's even easier to re-parse the sentence mentally so it uses the verb 'to differ'. Nothing will ever differ to or differ than anything; things will only ever differ from one another.
    • The first (differ to) may be a mistake for "defer to," which is something else entirely.
• "differential" (A calculus computation for the derivative; also a vehicle component and a term used in the medical phrase "differential diagnosis") for "deferential" (respectful, yielding)
• "diffuse" (adj, = spread out, thin or wispy; or verb, = to make something achieve that state) vs. "defuse" (to reduce or eliminate the volatility or explosive possibility of a situation or object)
  • Defusing a bomb the wrong way might well cause you to be diffused.
  • Related: "disperse" vs. "dispose". It's not the "bomb dispersal squad".
    • Although some will dispose of their rubbish by dispersing it.
• A "dike" is a wall used to hold back water. "Dyke" is a slur aimed at lesbians.
  • The boy who stuck his finger in a dyke got into a LOT of trouble for it.
• There is no 't' in "dimension".
• "dinning" (making a din, which is a noun for "loud unpleasant noise") vs. "dining" (eating a meal). One can make a din when dining, but correlation does not prove causation.
• "dire rear" for "diarrhea"—a hilariously apt eggcorn, but an eggcorn nonetheless. ("You know what a dire rear is, don't you?")
• "disburse" (pay out money) for "disperse" (scatter, spread about, diffuse)
• "discreet" (cautiously secretive) for "discrete" (in distinct pieces or amounts). And vice versa. The noun-form of "discreet" is "discretion", though, which doesn't help.
• "Disdain" is to dislike or have a low opinion of something. "Distain" is an archaic word for discoloring or staining an object. If you disdain someone, you dislike or resent them. If you distain someone, you've spilled ink on them. ("Distain" is more than likely an eggcorn for "disdain" that just happens to be a real, although archaic, word.)
• "Disguarded" for "discarded". Another perfect eggcorn.
• "Disinterested" (impartial) vs. "uninterested" (lacking interest in a thing or situation): "Judges should always be disinterested, but never uninterested, in the cases before them".
• "dissemble" (obfuscate, lie) for "disassemble" (take apart, translate machine code into assembly language)
• "dose" (a prescribed amount) vs. "doze" (sleep lightly, drowse) vs. "does" (third person present tense of "to do," or more-than-one female deer, depending on the pronunciation).
  • "doze" can also mean to break through an obstacle or impediment via brute force; a back-formation from "bulldoze" (itself a back-formation from "bulldozer").
• "dottering" (a variety of medical procedure) for "doddering" (senile)
• "dotting" (making dots) vs. "doting" (maternally solicitous)
• "dower" (property settled by a groom on his bride, which generally doesn't become payable until his death) vs. "dour" (severe, harsh, stern)
• "Draw" when what is meant is "drawer" (sliding box with a handle in a cabinet, dresser or chest). This is a perfect example of eye dialect—many people swallow the sound of the final "r" in the word, pronouncing it as "draw-ah", which eventually gets worn down to, and written as, "draw".
  • Unless you're from the midwest and pronounce it "droor," like door with an r.
  • Most women keep their draws in drawers.
• "drawer" is a sliding shelf. One who draws is an artist. (Or a draftsman, depending on context.)
  • Or a gunman.
  • Or a card dealer.
• "drawl" for "draw"
• "drier" (less wet) vs. "dryer" (a machine designed to make clothes less wet).
• "drowned" as present-tense, not just in writing but in speech. Played for laughs in Addams Family Values, where a swimming rescue simulation has the aspiring actress cry out "Help! I'm drownding!" The past tense then becomes "drownded," which is even more bizarre.
  • "Drownded" is very common in lower-class English accents.
• "drudge" (scullery maid, scutworker, blog author) for "dredge" (scrape the bottom of something, such as a river; or coat something in a powder, such as flour or sugar)
• "drug" is a general term for a wide array of chemical substances or the use thereof. "Dragged" is the past tense of the verb "to drag".^note Similar booboos and blunders have lasted long enough to become correct, turning the inherited d-past verb "to dig" and the Norman French loanword "to strive" into Germanic strong (i.e. stem-changing) verbs.
• "duel" (a fight between two people, usually because one has insulted the other and often to the death) vs. "jewel" (precious gem). Probably an eggcorn; some accents pronounce "du" as "ju" and make the words sound identical.
• Similarly, "duel" for "dual" (two things closely linked or one thing with two distinct parts). Unless you're The Scarlet Pimpernel, Zorro, The Masked Gladiator, or Yugi Muto, you probably don't have a duel identity. And unless you're The Jackal or Karvok, you probably can't dual someone.
• "due to" (caused by or owing to) vs. "do to" (do something to someone).
• "duly" (following proper procedure; as expected or predicted) vs. "dully" (with little interest; lacking liveliness; boredom). If you duly sign a document, you do so properly. If you dully sign a document, it bores you.
• "dying" (ceasing life functions) for "dyeing" (recoloring).
• "early adapter" (someone who adapts something very soon after acquiring it) for "early adopter" (someone who adopts something quickly). Someone who buys the very latest in technology as soon as it's released is an early adopter.
• "edged" (put a decorative border around, or describing a cutting edge) for "etched" (incised or burnt into a surface with a caustic chemical). "Etched" should also not be confused with "engraved" (incised into a surface with a tool).
• "edict" (n., formal proclamation) for "eidetic" (adj., (of memory) total-recall).
• "edition" (revision or printing of something) for "addition" (something that is added to something)
• "effluent" (water outflow, frequently sewage) vs. "affluent" (wealthy); despite the phrase "filthy stinking rich", these should never be confused.
• "egregious" (exceptional, from the Latin ex gregaris "not of the flock") should be avoided; it originally meant "exceptionally good" (which presumably is how Douglas Adams used it in Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency) but now more often means "exceptionally bad" (e.g. the error in the ZX Spectrum game Xavior whereby the end-game routine doesn't work) or just excessive. George Orwell fell into this trap in his essay "Politics and the English Language" (which has little or nothing to do with politics); he accused one Professor Hogben of not knowing what "egregious" meant, when the problem was that Hogben was using it in the modern sense instead of the original one. (Orwell was being hypocritical in his accusation, since he clearly failed to realize that a "battery" is an array of similar things (e.g. a battery of floodlights or of cannon) or that "to prescribe" means to state what must be, as opposed to "to describe" which merely states what is. Hogben's usage was thus correct.)
• "either... or" when used to describe more than two things. "Either A, B, or C" is wrong; it should be "A, B, or C" or possibly "Either A or B".
  • "Both" is also only to be used for lists of two items, no more. "Both 'A' and 'B'", not "Both 'A', 'B' and 'C'". Found in several places on this very wiki, not to mention endemic to the internet and real life.
  • If you need a phrase to introduce a list of more than two items, it's "Any of 'A', 'B', or 'C'" and "All of 'A', 'B' and 'C'".
  • The correct usages are "either... or..." and "neither... nor...". If you use "neither... or...", you're wrong.
• "elude" (to avoid or escape) for "allude" (to refer to indirectly). Relatedly, there's "elusion" (the act of eluding, evasion) vs "illusion" (a false or deceptive mental image" vs "allusion" (an indirect reference to something). Despite being spelled and pronounced similarly the words don't really have anything in common.
• "elephantiasis" (a disease that causes the victim's body parts to gruesomely swell up and deform) is often misspelled and mispronounced "elephantitis". While understandable, as the -itis suffix indicates an inflammatory condition, and inflammation is a symptom of elephantiasis, the use of the suffix is applied to whatever body part is inflamed (in this case the lymphatic system), and elephants are not part of the human body.
• "emerse" means to rise (or stand) above the surface of water. If that's not what you mean, you're probably looking for the far more common "immerse" (to be put into something like water).
• "eminent" (exalted) for "imminent" (about to happen).
  • Also "immanent" (inherently part of something).
• "empathy" and "sympathy" both indicate fellow-feeling for someone. "empathy", though, is for when you've actually been in that position yourself, whereas "sympathy" is for when you haven't but can connect regardless.
• "empress" (noun, female ruler of an empire) for "impress" (verb, to get a favorable or awed reaction from)
  • But often an empress is dressed to impress.
• "emerged" (came into view, came out of a situation, object or a liquid, or became known) for "immersed" (put under the surface of a liquid; dunked, or involved deeply) has been spotted on This Very Wiki.
• "emulate" (to behave in a similar way) for "immolate" (to set fire to). Although some emulations are so poor that immolation is the only sensible remedy, and conversely, emulating Thich Quang Duc involves immolation.
• "endorse" for "indorse". Whenever you sign a check that's made out to you, you indorse it. All other occasions, such as stating your support for a political candidate, is when you would endorse something.
• "enormity" for "enormousness". "Enormity" means "huge badness," not "hugeness." (Although, for hugeness, the term "magnitude" or "significance" would be preferable in formal writing.)
  • According to Bill Bryson, Ronald Reagan fell victim to this one, saying when he won the presidential election that he "could not believe the enormity of what had happened".
    • Nor could his rivals.
• "en-scrolling" for "ensorcelling". Possibly a spellchecker-caused error.
• "entropy" (a physics term for the amount of increasing disorder/disorganization in a system such as the principle defining the eventual heat-death of the universe, among other meanings) for "atrophy" (deteriorate from lack of use)
• "envelop" (to wrap up in; to surround entirely; to conceal or obscure) vs. "envelope" (a cover for a letter; the fabric structure enclosing the gasbag of a balloon or airship, or the upper and lower operational limits for a device)
• "En garde" (interjection used in swordfighting, meaning, more or less "get ready") vs "on guard" (paying attention, though in this context it's a eggcorn), an understandable mistake, as the two are pronounced the same and saying "on guard" would make some sense in context. Still a mistake nevertheless.
• "epithet" (a nickname or descriptive term, often with negative connotations). vs "epitaph" (writing on a tombstone)
• "erogenous" (giving rise to sexual pleasure) for "erroneous" (wrong). Quite possibly a Freudian Slip, or risen from a cloudy memory of the 1977 self-help book Your Erroneous Zones by Wayne Dwyer.
• "erstwhile" (former) for "out-of-line" or "poorly behaved." Your companion may behave objectionably, but they're not an erstwhile companion unless you no longer associate with them.
• "eschatological" (having to do with the end of days) vs. "scatological" (having to do with feces or obscenity in general). Admittedly, anyone who actually knows one of these words is probably unlikely to use it incorrectly, but any context in which the mistake can be made is liable to be rather grating. But don't sweat it: this shit ain't the end of the world.
• "-esk", an misspelling of "-esque" (a suffix meaning "like" or "resembling", e.g. "picturesque" = "like a picture").
• "Esoteric" (known only by a small group, subculture, etc) vs "exoteric" (commonly known). As the word "exoteric" is pretty obscure, this is often due to a typo or spellchecker mistake.
• "etc." or "et cetera" (Latin for "and others", suggests alternative examples) vs. "and so on" (which suggests repetition)
  • Even worse, "ect." (electroconvulsive therapy) for "etc."
  • Due to it meaning "and others", saying "and etc" means you're saying "and and others".
• "evade" (dodge) for "avoid" (stay away from).
  • Especially found in relation to taxes. Tax avoidance is using shrewd accounting and/or Loophole Abuse to legally minimize the amount of tax one pays; tax evasion is illegally not paying taxes one should be.
• Also "evade" vs. "escape": One comes before capture/captivity and one comes after (you evade arrest and escape custody). Generally, of course, escaping is followed by evasion to avoid being recaptured.
• "everyday" (ordinary) for "every day" (occurring during each 24-hour period)
• "evidentially" (having to do with the existence or state of being of evidence) vs. "evidently" (apparently, seemingly)
• "exasperate" (to annoy or irritate) for "exacerbate" (to make something worse than it already is)
  • It may be all right to confuse them when you're dealing with a temperamental Tyke Bomb or the like, however.
• "executor" vs "executioner". The former puts in effect legal statutes such as person's last will: the latter carries out the capital punishments.
• "exercise" for "exorcise". It's the difference between Richard Simmons and Linda Blair.
  • Back, back, devil! You must desist! I'm Richard Simmons, the exercise-ist! And one, two, three, four and one, two, three, four!
• "exiting" (leaving through the out door) for "exciting" (giving or encouraging a heightened state of thrill or energy)
• "ex-patriot" (someone who is no longer patriotic) for "expatriate" (someone who's left their native country). A person may be an expatriate because they're an ex-patriot, but this is still a mistake.
• There was once an electronics catalogue which had several (often hilarious) spelling errors. Probably the funniest was the part described as an "expendable logic gate" (instead of "expandable")—perhaps it included a self-destruct circuit.
• "extend" (to increase a thing's limits, borders, or capabilities) for "extent" (a things limits as they are). An extension ladder extends to increase the extent to which you can climb.
• "exulted" (rejoiced, showed triumphant joy) for "exalted" (lofty, elevated)
• "eye" (organ of vision) for "aye" (agreement from a seaman)
• "facism" (something to do with faces, presumably) for "fascism" (a political ideology).
• Many YouTube videos claim to be lists of "false facts". If an item is false then, by definition, it isn't a fact.
  • It's a factoid. A factoid isn't a small fact, it's something that resembles^note the usual function of the -oid suffix a fact but isn't.
• "Fallible"(Imperfect, capable of making mistakes) vs "foulable" (not a word, but would presumably mean able to be fouled) probably an eggcorn.
• "fallow" (a field plowed and tilled but not planted) for "follow" (come after, pursue). Also, "fallowing" (enriching a field's soil by plowing and tilling but not planting) for "following" (subsequent, coming after). Unless the story is set on a farm, the author probably meant the latter.
• "fare" (food, as in a "bill of fare;" also, a fee charged for transportation) for "fair". Flanders And Swann used this as a deliberate pun in their song "A Transport of Delight", about London buses; they quote the line "Earth has not anything to show more fair" twice, but the second time it's "fare".
• "fatally" for "futilely." "Fatally" means something was fatal, i.e. lethal, deadly, not survivable. "Futilely" means something was futile, impossible, doomed to failure. Likely the result of an overzealous spellchecker, "futilely" being a funny word to spell.
• "faucet" (plumbing fixture which dispenses water) for "facet" (any of the flat surfaces of a gem, alternately any of the details or aspects of an object or situation). Also "fossette", a fairly rare term outside anatomy and zoology meaning a small depression in a solid structure.
• The use of "federal" crimes when one actually means serious crimes. In fact, a federal crime is one that violates a law made by the U.S. government (or certain other national governments with federated systems), as opposed to laws made by local (including state, provincial, or territorial) authorities. Thus, in the U.S., while bank robbery is a federal offense, in many cases, rape, murder (including cop-killing), child molestation, kidnapping (that does not involve crossing state lines), torture, and even some acts of terrorism are covered under state, not federal law, and are not federal offenses. This is especially egregious when you are dealing with nations that do not have a federated system of government.
  • On a related note, the use of "federal" and "national" as synonyms. This is true only of approximately twenty of the world's countries—those with federated systems of government. (Although among those countries are some of the big ones ^note The U.S., Canada, Mexico, Venezuela, Brazil, Argentina, Nigeria, Sudan, South Sudan, Ethiopia, Somalia, Russia, Bosnia-Herzegovina, Germany, Iraq, India, Pakistan, Malaysia, Australia. .)
• "feet" (things at the ends of your legs; no, the other ends) vs. "feat" (accomplishment)
• "Feint" for "faint". "To faint" means that someone's collapsed into unconsciousness, usually from shock. A "feint" is a deceptive tactic intended to make an opponent move into a weak position. "Playing possum" could be described as a "faint feint".
  • "Faint" as an adjective can also mean something along the lines of "slight" or "barely perceptible", leading to confusion on the part of some of us as to whether Faint Attack always hits because the opponent can't see it coming, or because it's actually a feint attack (because it certainly isn't an attack that involves the user fainting, although playing possum is always a possibility).^note Fortunately, Pokémon X and Y clarify that it's Feint Attack.
• "Felicity" (a female given name, originally meaning "happiness" though the common noun "felicity" also means "aptness") for "facility" (ease of use).
  • Also not to be confused with the above is "fidelity" (faithfulness).
• "Feudal" (pertaining to feudalism in medieval Europe) vs. "futile" (useless or ineffective).
• "fiancé" and "fiancée". This one's French through and through, so "fiancé" (without the final E) is the man you're going to be married to, and "fiancée" (with the extra "e") is the woman. Now that same-sex marriage is a thing, the distinction is quite possibly more important than it has ever been.
  • Similarly for née, used to identify a married woman's birth name. If you ever have occasion to use it for a man, it should be né. Alice Smith, née Jones; Bob Jones, né Smith.
• "fiary" instead of "fairy". Although some fairies are fiery.
• "Filler-buster" instead of "filibuster" (eggcorn written by an Australian who was not familiar with the U.S. legislature).
  • "Philibuster" instead of "filibuster". This was used as a deliberate pun for an album title.
• "Filter" is a device containing material for sieving out impurities, especially one used to extract impurities from air or water. A "philter" is a magic potion, especially a love potion.
• "Firry" or "firey" for "fiery".
  • In Australian English "firey" is a slang term for a firefighter. This comes from the Australian habit of shortening words and adding "-ie" or "-y". Tradespeople become "tradies" and postmen "posties". "firey" gets a -y" because it ends in a vowel, not a constanant.
• "firstable" (able to be first?) is not a word. It's an eggcorn of "first of all" (first in a list).
• "flair" (special ability, or stylishness) for "flare" (a sudden burst of light or intensity; what trousers did in the '70s).
• "flagrant" (brazen wrongdoing) vs. "fragrant" (sweet-smelling)
  • On that note, "blatant" vs. "flagrant". Both refer to something brazen and conspicuous, but "blatant" emphasises the the boldness of the act while "flagrant" emphasises that it was inappropriate or immoral.
• "flammable", "inflammable", and "non-flammable". "flammable" means that something is likely to burst into flames. "inflammable" means—exactly the same thing as "flammable". For their antonym, look no further than "non-flammable".
  Dr. Nick: "'Inflammable' means 'flammable?' What a country!"
• "flaunt" and "flout" are often confused, perhaps because both actions are often performed blatantly or brazenly. To "flaunt" your possessions or attributes is to show them off. To "flout" a law is to break it. "Lady Godiva flouted the law by flaunting her body in public."
  • On a related note the correct phrase is "flout authority", although you could concievably "flaunt authority" if it's your own authority you're showing off.
• What properties a "flourescent tube" would have as opposed to a "fluorescent tube"? Disperse finely ground wheat when you switch it on, perhaps?
  • Florescent is a real word, but it means flowering (in either the literal or figurative sense). Occasional hilarity results when people are actually trying to use this one and get the more common one instead, e.g. an archaeological report referring to "The fluorescent Hohokam civilization..."
  • On a related note, "fluor" for "flour". This is probably a typo, but "fluor" is an actual English word meaning either (archaically) a discharge from the human body, or a soft mineral (also known as fluorite and fluorspar) that is the most common source of fluorine. Neither is something you should be making bread from.
• "fool moon" for "full moon" (May be a simple typo, but it's unintentionally amusing. Or it may be an intentional reference to the title of the second Harry Dresden novel by Jim Butcher.)
• "fore" (prefix for "in front") for "for" (a preposition, conjunction, and a prefix) or "four" (a number). It has been the source of a few mistakes, as seen below.
• "foreboding" (implying or forecasting ill events) for "forbidding" (frighteningly impressive, as well as its more common usage).
• "forward" (direction) for "forewarned" (given advance warning).
• "foreword" (part of a book) for "forward" (direction).
• "forbear" (refrain) for "forebear" (ancestor).
• "Formally" instead of "formerly".
• "fort" (a military stronghold) for "forte" (a person's best subject or skill). Historically, these were pronounced the same, and indeed have the same origin (meaning "strong point"), but it has become common to pronounce "forte" with two syllables (as is correct for the musical term "forte", meaning loud).
• "forth" (a direction, or a river in Scotland) for "fourth" (a number)—seen a lot in Harry Potter fics ("forth year")
  • Forth is also a programming language. So-named because it was intended as a "fourth-generation" programming language and the IBM 1130, on which it was devised, only allowed five-letter file names.
• "Fortunate" (lucky) vs "Fortuitous" (coincidental). A fortuitous event may also be a fortunate one, but the words are not synonymous. You could say your planning an escape route in case your house caught fire was fortunate, but it wasn't fortuitous.
• "founder" (n. a person who starts something, v. to sink, literally or metaphorically) vs. "flounder" (n. a fish, v. to thrash about in the water)
• "Fourty" (not unless it's Middle English) vs. "forty" (the proper spelling).
• "free" is often abused. Back in the days of film cameras, it was common for photo labs to offer deals including a "free" replacement film; including one lab which offered two deals, one with "free" film and another without, leading a newspaper to ask "if the film is free, what accounts for the price difference?". In the mid-1990s, firms sprang up offering so-called "free" internet access (one was actually called Freeserve), but such access was actually pay-as-you-go and, for regular use, substantially more expensive than non-"free" access. Currently mobile phones are being offered on deals such as "free for £15/month"; again, spot the contradiction—if the only way to get a phone is to enter a £15/month service contract, you aren't getting it "free", you're getting it on what used to be called "hire purchase"—with the difference that you never own it.
  • This stems from the fact that 'free' has more than one meaning. In this case, the distinction is made between 'free' meaning 'unrestricted' and 'free' as in 'free of charge'. Both uses are sound linguistically nevertheless.
• If something is more free than something else, it is "freer". It isn't "free-er", which looks like someone hesitating mid-sentence. Bonus points if you draw attention to your error by spelling it with quotation marks.
  • Many linguists would argue that "freer" is just as invalid as "free-er". Free should be an absolute, something is either free or not.
    • This begs the question of whether freer than free means you're paid for owning it, instead of being required to pay to purchase it.
  • But a "freer" can be a noun meaning "that which frees" (e.g. unsticks by relieving friction), such as a lubricant.
  • Or It could mean having more freedoms.
• "full" (the word, meaning "having no space for any more") vs. "-ful" (the suffix, meaning "full of").
• "full-proof" in place of "fool-proof". Could be related to the "rum-for-room" dialect of English, could be a typo.
• "furl" (roll or fold something securely) vs. "furrow" (either a wrinkle on a person's forehead or what a ploughed field is covered with). A confused person may furrow their brow, but only an alien or mutant could furl their brow. And don't talk about a furrowed sail, either; it may have wrinkles in it, but the word you want is furled.
• "furry" (covered in fur or a member of a certain fandom) instead of "fury" (intense anger and rage).
• "gambol" (to dance or caper about) for "gamble" (to make a bet or take a chance).
  • This confusion was deliberately used as a pun by the management of Windsor Greyhound Track, whose restaurant was called "Eton Gambol" (Eton being the name of the local district —yes, as in the famous public school).
• "gamut" (full range of something) vs. "gauntlet" (a metal glove). Just to add to the confusion, "run the gamut" and "run the gauntlet" are both idioms. To "run the gamut" is to experience the full range of emotions, music, etc. To "run the gauntlet" is to face attacks from many different angles.
• "gantlet" (a Death Course or other ordeal) vs. "gauntlet". Some dictionaries accept the latter spelling for the former.
  • The idiom is always "run the gauntlet", never "run the gantlet". The reason for this is that it derives from a sort of military discipline.
  • However, it was originally "run the gantlet" (from the Swedish gantlope/gantlopp, a narrow lane), hence "gantlet track", where two railway tracks are overlaid to allow two-way working (but only one way at a time) without the use of switches; "gauntlet" was originally a French word for a long (often metal) glove which covers the wrist as well as the hand. Since these words are similarly spelled and military, they have converged, to the point that "gantlet" has disappeared from British English. It remains in American English, hence the name of the Doom 2 level.
• "genera" (plural of genus) in place of the French loanword "genre"
• One common error (seen in the edit summaries of this very page) is to claim that "a gerund is the -ing form of a verb". Not true, since a straight verb, and a gerundive (a verb used as an adjective—a gerund is a verb used as a noun) can also end in "-ing":

Verb: "He was smoking a large cigar"
Gerund: "Smoking is injurious to health"
Gerundive: "He held a smoking gun"

• Also, the resultative noun (naming the object resulting from an action, such as "building" or "painting") is not a gerund. Only the verb naming the process is a gerund, as is "building" in "Building is hard work".

• Gentle (peaceful) vs Gentile (non Jewish person) vs Genteel (polite) vs Genital (sex organ).
• "Gentleman" (a Nice Guy, basically) is often used when it's completely inappropriate (such as calling a bank robber a gentleman). Most likely this stems from the practice of using "gentleman" as just a synonym for "man" as in "ladies and gentleman"
• "getaway" (act of escaping or a place people go to for a short vacation) vs. "get away" (to escape). The former is used as a noun, the latter as a verb.
• "get's" (not a word) vs. "gets" (obtains).
• "give tongue" is used only in reference to hunting (it means the dogs have found the scent and started barking). It does not mean "to speak one's mind". The author was probably thinking of the idiom "to give vent (to feelings, thoughts, opinions, etc.)".
• Certain People like to claim that "goyim" is Hebrew for "cattle", the implication being that Jews see everyone else as cattle. In reality the Hebrew word for cattle is "bakar", and "goyim" (singular goy) is really just a mildly derogatory term for non Jewish people.
• "graduated" (calibrated, divided into degrees, granted an academic degree or diploma) for "gravitated" (to drawn inexorably towards something)
• It's "grammar", not "grammer". An easy typo, yes, but all too easy to misinterpret. "Is it a typo of 'grammar', or 'gramme', perhaps?" Or maybe it's Kelsey.
• "grate" (a frame of iron bars, as part of a fireplace; or a harsh rasping sound) for "great" (really good).
• The Star Wars character and the adjective are both spelled "grievous". Not "grevious".
  • And while we're on the subject, they're both pronounced the same way too: "gree-vus", not "greevy-us".
• "grizzly" (a type of brown bear (Ursus arctos), subspecies U. a. horribilis, found in Alaska, western Canada, and parts of the northwestern United States) for "grisly" (terrifying, horrible), or vice versa. A grizzly bear attack could cause grisly wounds to its victim.
  • Note that according to The Other Wiki this confusion was the reason for that "horribilis" in the species name.
  • In the same vein: "grizzled" vs. "grisled." The first means "having grey hair," the second... less so.
  • The parts of the meat you can't chew? That's "gristle". It's gristly.
• "Gunnery" (the skill of using really big cannons to blow holes in things) for "gurney" (a wheeled cot used to transport injured or ill persons).

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