Original air date: 4/9/2000
Production code: BABF-14
Homer finds a discarded giant tiki head while trash rummaging with Bart, but when he re-routes the gas line to make the head spew fire, it ignites the back lawn, and he quickly flees to Moe's until the heat (literally) dies down. He finds Barney in a funk, but when Barney says it was his birthday last week and no-one remembered, Moe produces a video of his birthday party, thrown at the Simpson home; Barney was too drunk to remember it. When it becomes apparent that his friends see him as an alcoholic loser, he resolves to give up booze. He starts going to AA meetings and signs up for helicopter lessons using a coupon Moe gave him for his birthday. However, his new sobriety causes a rift with Homer, who is shunted into the role of the resident pathetic drunk at Moe's Tavern, and feels that Barney now thinks himself too good for his former drinking buddy.
Meanwhile, Springfield Bell announce a contest for the phone book's new cover photo. Bart and Lisa find an old camera in the closet and try to find the perfect shot for the cover, finally settling on a panoramic view of Springfield as seen from the top of Mt. Springfield. Unfortunately, when Bart ejects the flash bulb after taking the picture, he and Lisa don't notice it set fire to some dry brush, and soon the mountaintop is engulfed in a forest fire, trapping the Simpson siblings. Homer sees the kids' plight on the news, and pleads with Barney to fly him to Mt. Springfield to rescue them. Barney's piloting skills are still sketchy, and he ends up landing in the middle of a bridge, where a Duff truck jackknifes and empties six-packs all over the road. Barney is convinced he needs Liquid Courage to keep flying, but Homer pushes him back and drinks the entire six-pack himself (getting blind drunk in the process). Touched by Homer's "heroism", Barney flies the helicopter to the mountaintop, and Bart and Lisa are saved.
The siblings are thrilled when Marge says their photo won the contest, but their excitement gives way to horror when they see that the photo on the cover is a black and white picture of the two of them as toddlers, sitting naked on the same toilet; apparently the reel of film in the camera still had some undeveloped pictures on it when they found it. They console themselves with the prize: a new bicycle. Meanwhile, Barney insists to Homer that he has sworn off alcohol, unaware that Moe has manipulated him into becoming addicted to caffeine instead.
Tropes:
- The Alcoholic: Barney drinks so much that Duff Brewery workers once posed for a photograph with a sign reading "Thank you, Barney".
- Bait-and-Switch: One scene starts with Barney identifying himself and explaining about his drinking problem only to be informed that he mistakenly entered an AAA (American Automobile Association) building instead of an AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) meeting.
- Big Eater: Rainier Wolfcastle briefly appears as one, fattening himself up on junk food for a role as a fat secret agent. He's implied to be lying.
- Call-Back:
- While rummaging through the closet for a camera, a bunch of memorabilia from Homer's earlier adventures and accomplishments are in the cupboard, like the Mr. Plow jacket, the Be Sharps Grammy, the town crier bell and hat and the Mr. Sparkle box.
- Barney once again arrives at a location mistaking it for an AA meeting.
- Bart and Lisa create their own rendition of A Friend in Need with Santa's Little Helper taking part.
- While on the summit of Mt. Springfield, Lisa notes that she can see the Springfield Squidport and abandoned Springfield monorail.
- Canines Gambling in a Card Game: Bart and Lisa trying to recreate Dogs Playing Poker in real life for a photography contest.
- Cheaters Never Prosper: Nelson steals Bart and Lisa's recreation of Dogs Playing Poker for the contest. He doesn't win.
- Couch Gag: The Simpsons run into their Tracey Ullman Show counterparts. Both families look at each other and run out of the room, screaming.
- Diabolus ex Machina: Just as Bart and Lisa attempt to take their picture of dogs playing poker, Nelson steals their photo at the last second.
- Didn't Think This Through:
- Moe openly laughs at the idea of Barney quitting drinking before remembering he just lost his best customer.
- Instead of getting new reel of film for their camera, Bart and Lisa took their picture with the old reel that was in the camera. As a result, the new phone book now has a picture of them as toddlers sitting naked on a toilet.
- Drunk Driver: Homer. He explains to Barney—who wants to learn how to fly a helicopter—that unlike driving a car, you need to be sober to do that.
- Embarrassing Old Photo: One of Bart and Lisa ends up winning the photo contest.
- Evil Laugh: Moe delivers one in the end as he uses coffee to once again have Barney as a customer.
- Failed a Spot Check: The video of Barney dressed as Marge shows it took Homer a moment before he realized he clearly wasn't talking to his wife.
- Fat and Proud: When Bart and Lisa spot a surprisingly overweight Rainier Wolfcastle, he casually states he's getting ready for a fat secret agent role and goes about stuffing his face with junk food.
- Finger in the Mail: Referenced. Homer and Bart find that Milhouse's parents have thrown away his blanket and Homer gets the idea to sell it back to him piece by piece.
- Forgotten Birthday: Barney thinks his friends forgot his birthday, but it's him that, due his alcoholism, forgot the party.
- Friendship Moment: During the rescue attempt, Barney's tempted to drink a case of beer to calm his nerves, but Homer saves his newfound sobriety by downing the case himself.
- From Bad to Worse: Barney is horrified to see video of him at the party, asking if this is how he behaves while drunk. Homer tells him this is the "Professor Barney" stage and thus far from the worst of it. He then fast-forwards to just that.
- Gay Bar Reveal: Flipped around after Barney announces he's quitting drinking and leaves the bar.Moe: Well, the handwriting's on the wall. To stay afloat, this bar's going to have to go queer.
Camp Gay Customer: You mean it's not? Ugh. Wrong again, Gay Guide to Springfield. [tosses the book away] - Halfway Plot Switch: One of the fastest ones yet: the episode opens with Homer and Bart doing late-night trash rummaging, whereupon Homer finds a discarded tiki statue. The next scene sees him playing with it in his backyard, having rerouted the gas line so it could spit fire... only for him to accidentally set it on fire, prompting him to book it to Moe's.
- Must Have Caffeine: Since Barney won't be purchasing beer anymore, Moe starts selling coffee and get him hooked on double mocha lattes.
- My God, What Have I Done?: Barney is legitimately disgusted with himself when he sees footage of how he acts when he's drunk, such as harassing Lisa and, somehow, breaking into the Simpson house dressed as and thinking he's Marge before he falls off the stairs and tries lapping up spilled beer on the floor.
- Noodle Incident: Barney has an arm handcuffed to a police car door and doesn't remember how or when it happened. His friends say they can't imagine him without it.
- Papa Wolf: Homer may have been bitter and resentful when Barney got his life back on track after giving up alcohol, but he immediately encourages Barney to put his helicopter flying skills to good use when Bart and Lisa are caught in the fire on Mt. Springfield.Homer: (picking up a nearby payphone) The call is from heroism. Will you accept the charges?
- Paper-Thin Disguise:
- During a videotape of Barney's birthday party, there's a scene where he's dressed like Marge. Homer initially mistakes him for the real Marge.
- A TV ad about a photography contest features a "mysterious prize". The wrapping's shape makes it obvious that the prize is a bicycle. A kid shows up and rides the still wrapped bicycle.
- Rock Bottom: Barney sees video of himself dressed as Marge while trying to lick beer off a floor.
- Status Quo Is God: Subverted. Barney stays sober for several seasons after this.
- Temporary Bulk Change: Bart insists towards Lisa that the only photos people care about feature celebrities at their worst. Cue a fat Rainier Wolfcastle walking out of the Kwik-E-Mart gorging on junk food, claiming he's preparing for a fat secret agent role.
- With Friends Like These...: Barney's bar pals openly laugh at his embarrassments and get him gag gifts for his birthday. Homer at least later tries to help him out, though the two end up arguing after losing a key shared interest.
- Your Approval Fills Me with Shame: When Barney is trying to go clean and sober, he throws away the picture of the Duff Brewery employees posing with a giant sign reading "THANK YOU BARNEY", no longer seeing it as a compliment.
