"Attack of the Killer Kung-Fu Wolf Bitch" is the 6th episode of the 2nd season of The Boondocks, and the 21st episode overall. It originally aired on November 19, 2007.
After several unsuccessful attempts at online dating, Robert finally meets a beautiful young woman named Luna through MySpace. Luna seems nice and charming at first... but it soon turns out that's actually a crazy, deadly warrior on the verge of a mental breakdown. Can Granddad survive this encounter with a psycho girl?
Tropes:
- An Aesop:
- Don't invite strangers you met online into your home if you don't know them very well. Because they might harbor a dark secret.
- Don't use your past as an excuse for going crazy. Do what you can to move on from it and take responsibility for your own actions. Also killing yourself is absolutely not taking responsibility for your actions.
- Choose your friends wisely. If you find them encouraging your worst tendencies, it might be time for some new friends.
- And Show It to You: During dinnertime with the Freemans, Luna gives an anecdote about when she participated in a brutal martial arts tournament called the Kumite. She fought against a man who was much larger than her, beating the shit out of him before gleefully ripping out his heart with her bare hands.
- Armor-Piercing Question: After listening to Luna wail about all of her abusive ex-boyfriends, Robert asks why she kept dating men like that in the first place.
- Bad "Bad Acting": Huey emailed Tom on a script and instructions while they are held hostage by Luna. Unfortunately, he reads these aloud in front of Luna instead of memorizing them, leading him to become a hostage himself.
- Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: Luna seems very nice and affable at first, but quickly reveals her Ax-Crazy violent tendencies over the course of the episode.
- Blatant Lies: Huey advises Robert to stick to a made-up story about paying respects to a late cousin, requiring him to fly to California. Instead, he tries to trick Luna into leaving him by claiming that he has to attend the birthday party of his old friend, Fidel Castro. Luna believes Robert up until Nicole calls to tell her that she's been fooled, by pointing out that Fidel's birthday was on a different date than what he claimed.
- Curb-Stomp Battle: Huey loses a fight to Luna, a skilled martial artist, very badly.
- Dating Service Disaster:
- The episode begins with a montage of Robert being on the receiving end of catfishing; he meets a series of women through a dating site, who always posted sexy profile photos... only for them to all turn out to be way more old and ugly in real life.
- Robert is later (seemingly) more successful when he meets Luna, who's really just as attractive as she claimed to be on MySpace; however, he didn't anticipate that her personality wouldn't be so good...
- Dark Action Girl: Luna. She was trained in the martial art of "White Lotus Kung Fu" by one of her ex-boyfriends, a Shaolin monk from China. She also claims to be the last surviving White Lotus master, implying that she killed all the rest of them (including her boyfriend).
- Domestic Abuse: Parodied for both laughs and drama. In the climax, Luna reveals her backstory of how she ran away from home as a young girl, due to having an Abusive Dad who slapped her mother around for petty reasons like undercooking his fried chicken. She then dated a series of men who were also physically, emotionally, and/or verbally abusive to her. Her first boyfriend, a mob boss from Hong Kong named Kenny Wu, even slapped her for the same reason that her dad hit her mom (serving chicken that was too cold).
- Driven to Suicide: Luna threatens to commit a Murder-Suicide by using a hand grenade to blow up herself along with Robert and Tom (who were both taken hostage by her). Fortunately, the situation is defused and Luna lets her captives go free, while she decides to take her life in a different direction... until Nicole calls her again and says she would "freakin' die" if she got rejected by Robert like Luna was, at which point Luna finally gives up and detonates the grenade she was holding.
- Freudian Excuse Is No Excuse: Both Robert and Tom tell Luna that while her past was horrible, it in no way excuses the fact that she's a homicidal basketcase.
- Hair-Trigger Sound Effect: As a Running Gag throughout the episode, chop-sockey sound effects punctuate every mention of the word "Kumite".
- Idiot Ball: Tom, being the DA, easily could've gotten the police involved when he came to check on the Freemans, given that Huey's email dictates they were in potential danger. If he did, Luna might not have taken him captive.
- Nerves of Steel: Huey doesn't even flinch when Luna blows herself up.
- No Guy Wants an Amazon: Played with; it's not the fact that Luna is a highly skilled martial artist that bothers Robert, but it's how she's also a ruthless killer who bragged about ripping out someone's heart. Robert is justifiably scared of her, and so he decides to dump Luna, though not in an honest way (see Blatant Lies).
- Oh, Crap!: Riley and Robert have one when they see how badly Luna beat Huey. The Stunned Silence below counts as well.
- Playing the Victim Card: After tying up Robert and Tom, Luna claims this and her past dating habits aren't her fault because as her friend Nicole says it's due to lying men. Robert tells her to stop being a victim and specifically asks why she kept going out with the same kind of abusive man in the first place.
- Properly Paranoid: As Robert himself puts it, when Luna calls him out on his lie he explains that he lied in the first place because he was afraid she might do something insane if he got her angry. She only proved him right by taking him hostage, threatening to sodomizing him with a broomstick, and then took his neighbor hostage.
- Shout-Out: There are two instances based on Mortal Kombat:
- During a flashback, Luna pulls off a "Fatality" by ripping out her opponent's heart like Kano, one of the game's characters.
- She later captures Tom after knocking him out in a "Flawless Victory". The message "LUNA WINS. FLAWLESS VICTORY" is displayed.
- Stunned Silence: The Freemans get this when Luna bragged about how she killed a man in a fight and laughed about it. They had frozen looks of shock on their faces until they quickly said they all had to go to the bathroom.
- Toxic Friend Influence: Luna receives very bad advice from her friend Nicole over the phone, and takes every single bit of it seriously; up to and including trying out Nicole's suggestion to kill Robert for lying to her, or committing suicide with a grenade.
- Underestimating Badassery: Huey doesn't believe Luna's story about being a master of the mythical White Lotus Style Kung Fu, and so challenges her to a sparring match in an attempt to get rid of her. He quickly learns the hard way that she was telling the truth.
- The Un-Smile: Whenever Luna is feeling or saying something particularly unhinged, her pupils shrink and she makes a smile that looks like she's about to murder everyone in the room.
- Woman Scorned:
- When Luna learns that Robert lied to her as an excuse to dump her, she's extremely pissed off when she finds out Robert believes she was crazy. She soon takes up Nicole's advice that she should punish Robert by kidnapping, torturing, and murdering him.
- Robert also tells Huey and Riley a (real life) anecdote that involved this trope, as a comparison to his situation with Luna. When Lionel Richie was sleeping around with a white mistress named Diane in a hotel room, his enraged wife Brenda barged in to attack both of them. Brenda punched Diane a few times, while throwing Lionel off the bed and repeatedly kicking his testicles.
