"The Euclid Alternative" is an episode of The Big Bang Theory that first aired on October 20, 2008. Directed by Mark Cendrowski.
When Leonard begins working nights in the lab so he can use a free electron laser for his X-ray diffraction experiment, Sheldon has to find an alternate way to work.
Penny starts to drive Sheldon to work but quickly gets tired of him, with his haranguing about the check engine light and the annoying games he tries to get Penny to play. So she drops him off at some distance from the university. Then Sheldon exhausts Howard and Raj's patience.
At an intervention, it is decided that Sheldon will get a learner's permit and learn to drive in a sophisticated simulation that the Army uses. In the simulation, Sheldon winds up in various unlikely accidents. Sheldon concludes he just can't learn how to drive. The only option left is for Sheldon to live in his office at work until Leonard's night experiments are done.
Tropes
- Backseat Driver: Sheldon complains about everything, despite his friends' generosity in driving him because he won't take the bus.
- Bilingual Bonus: There's a little bit of Spanish dialogue in this episode. Although it is all subtitled, the translations are actually quite good, and Spanish speakers might notice idiomatic details. "Las ratas no hacen pan tostado y le cortan las orillas," one cleaning lady says, which could have been subtitled in a rather literal translation as "Rats don't make toasted bread and cut the edges off" but is instead translated more idiomatically as "Rats don't make toast and cut off the crust."
- Biting-the-Hand Humor: Sheldon insults Penny's driving skills while she's giving him a ride to work.
- Driving a Desk: A more literal example. Howard sets up a driving simulation for Sheldon, who demonstrates that he Drives Like Crazy. Sheldon gives up after driving in a simulated version of the Glendale Galleria and crashing into the simulated pet store.Sheldon: Remind me to compliment Wolowitz on the software. It's amazingly detailed.
- Earn Your Happy Ending: Leonard is able to trick Sheldon into living in his office so that he can have the apartment room all to himself, telling Sheldon that he still needs more time to finish his project (which he already completed the week before).
- Ethnic Menial Labor: The cleaning ladies at the university cafeteria at night speak to each other in Spanish. On this show, Spanish is almost always spoken to mark a character as being of lower socioeconomic standing.
- Get Out!: Penny says this to Sheldon after he annoys her one time too many while she is driving him to work. He thinks she is asking him to fix her car engine, but as soon as he closes the door she drives away, leaving him on the side of the road. Sheldon just stands there for a moment, processing what just happened and what Penny actually meant, before beginning to walk the rest of the way to work.
- Groin Attack: Discussed; Sheldon says he doesn't understand why he needs a driver’s license because Albert Einstein never had a driver’s license. Penny says she never wanted to kick Albert Einstein in the nuts.
- Hypocritical Humor: So much from Sheldon.
- Sheldon keeps trying to correct Penny on her driving skills. While it's not wrong to agree with Sheldon that Penny is a poor, negligent driver, Sheldon himself has no driver's license.
- Sheldon advises Penny against talking while driving because it reduces her reaction time. However, Sheldon immediately wants to play chemistry games with her expecting her to give out answers while she's driving.
- Leonard telling off Sheldon to just figure out reliable transportation on his own, saying "You're a big boy".Sheldon: Don't talk to me like I'm a child! Now take me to return my Star Wars sheets!
- Immediate Self-Contradiction: Sheldon complains "I am clearly too evolved for driving!". Leonard calls Sheldon out for his sheer vacuity and lack of common sense by asking if he's such a genius, how will he get to work tomorrow morning. Sheldon resorts to living at where he works.
- It's All About Me: Sheldon very much thinks he's entitled to free rides from his friends because in his defense, friends care for each other.
- Manbaby: Sheldon, who in his late 20s acts like a little boy making his own friends give him rides in their cars as though they're his parents.
- Running Gag:
- The joke about the check engine light on Penny's car begins here.
- Sheldon repeatedly talking about Star Wars and the comic book store.
- Sassy Black Woman: Octavia Spencer as the DMV clerk.Sheldon: Excuse me, but I have some concerns about these questions.
Octavia: Look at that sign up there.
Sheldon: Yes?
Octavia: Does it say I give a damn?
Sheldon: No.
Octavia: That's because I don't. - Spoiled Brat: Sheldon non-stop. He expects someone to drive him because he refuses to take the bus, and constantly bothers them while they are driving him, never once thanking them. When everyone else tells him to get his own license so he will stop bugging them, he insists he doesn't need one, even though he clearly does.
- The Thing That Would Not Leave: Sheldon is this to the DMV, being so annoying to the extent that the clerk tries spoon-feeding him all the answers and eventually gives him his learner's permit to make him go away.
- That Poor Cat: Sheldon during his virtual driving session crashes into a pet store. Leonard claims he feels sorry for the cats.
- Ungrateful Bastard: Never, ever offer to give Sheldon a ride. It'll just make him ask you for more and he'll be the most annoying carpool guest ever.
- We Will Not Have Appendixes in the Future: Sheldon argues that his pinky toes and lateral incisors are smaller than average, indicating that he is a more advanced form of humanity, a "homo novus", and thus is too evolved to learn how to drive. Leonard would beg to differ, but doesn't bother.
