Recap / Strong Bad Email E 127 Long Pants

Airdate: Monday, March 28, 2005

Sender: Clancy

Strong Bad: (singing) And if I email you! Girl, woman! (briefly holds up pieces of paper that say "Girl" and "Woman" as he says those words) Oh, would you email me? Girl, woman! (holds up the papers again, then brings up the email)

Strong Bad gets a long, rambling email from "Clanky" about why Homestar doesn't wear pants. Too long, for Strong Bad's tastes.

Strong Bad: Aw, too long, Clanky, too looong! Good thing you didn't indent, man, or this never woulda made it past my 2nd paragraph filter, Edga Jr.
(Strong Bad brings up a splash screen for "Edga Jr.: The Long Email Killa Filta", which has a scowling, red-headed boy saying "Indent and Die!")
Strong Bad: Aw, look at him. He's one o' them red-haireded rapscalli... wags.

Strong Bad decides to edit the email with his "trusty, slightly dusty, electronic light-pen input high-tech expensive device"... that is to say, a correction pen, which he applies liberally to the Lappy's screen to abridge Clancy's email.

Strong Bad: "Dear Strong Bad, Why wear pants? Creepy pants all the time get some. Maybe parachute, maybe clown care. Some ants toot, Clanky." Now there's an email worth answering. "Some ants toot", tee hee!

As Strong Bad prepares to cite Adam West's thoughts on the question of "Why wear pants?", Homestar comes in to show off his "creepy pants"... and the garish pair of purple cut-off shorts Homestar is wearing are all kinds of creepy to Strong Bad.

Strong Bad: Ew, Homestar! What're you wearing them Daisy Dukes for?!
Homestar: 'Cause you said, "Creepy pants all the time get some."
Strong Bad: Get some what?
Homestar: I dunno... light globes?
Strong Bad: ...Light globes.
Homestar: You know, like in a lamp! Light globes!

Strong Bad tries to change the subject to the matter of Homestar's pants, or apparent lack thereof, something that Homestar proves to be very touchy about.

Homestar: I have long pants, I wear long pants. I'm a long pants man, long pants, long pants!
Strong Bad: Okay, calm down... I didn't mean to—
Homestar: (jumps up onto the desk) Long pants, Strong Bad! The longest pants! Everybody everybody! Longest pants! (randomly teleports around the room) Long long long long long long pants!
Strong Bad: Oight! Ah! That's it! We need to get you some serious clown care, man!
Homestar: But I was told long pants! Long pants! They said long pants! Always long pants! Long, my pants! Gleaming pants! Glorious pants! (runs off. the Daisy Dukes fly off as he leaves, landing on Strong Bad's foot)

Strong Bad: (trying to shake the pants off of him) Bleh! Egh! BLEEEGGEHHEGH! (the pants finally fly off his foot and land on the floor. The Cheat enters, wielding Strong Bad's BMW lighter)

The Cheat: (The Cheat noise. he proceeds to set the pants on fire, whereupon they instantly combust with a noxious green burst of flame)

After The Cheat helps him to dispose of Homestar's "creepy pants", Strong Bad proceeds to shift blame onto Clancy for bringing up the elephant in the room and causing the whole mess in the first place.

Strong Bad: Noice work, Clanky. You made Homestar go nuts and you've seriously creeped me out. And how am I supposed to get this crap offa here? (tries to wipe the correction fluid off the Lappy's screen) Stupid made-up technology that I made up... paint pen... The Cheat! Call tech support and tell 'em you broke the Lappy again.
(The Paper comes down.)

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Tropes:

• Berserk Button: Telling Homestar that he does not wear any pants will result in him losing his temper, as Strong Bad eventually found out.
• Blah, Blah, Blah: Strong Bad gets tired of Clancy's long e-mail and abridges the bulk of it as "blabbity blah, blah blebbity bloo."
• Blatant Lies: Strong Bad shortens Clancy's e-mail with a "light-pen" that's really just a correction fluid pen.
• Bottle Episode: This is the only Lappy e-mail that takes place entirely in the computer room, and there are three characters in the episode (not counting Marzipan's appearance in an Easter egg).
• Brick Joke: Strong Bad's modified email includes the nonsese phrase "maybe clown care". After Homestar's inital freak out Strong Bad quips, "We need to get you some serious clown care, man!"
• Comically Missing the Point: An Easter Egg sees Homestar get snapped out of his funk over the "long pants" incident... by hearing Marzipan mention people assuming she's a broom. His response is a confused "You're not a broom?!"
• Comical Overreacting: Homestar flips out after Strong Bad accuses him of not wearing pants.
• Department of Redundancy Department: As Strong Bad struggles to clean the Lappy's screen of correction fluid, he says "stupid made-up technology that I made up".
• Didn't Think This Through: Using correction fluid on a laptop screen will only end poorly once it dries, as Strong Bad finds out.
• Fan Disservice: Strong Bad is disgusted by seeing Homestar wearing purple Daisy Dukes.
• Felony Misdemeanor: Strong Bad doesn't like emails with more than one paragraph and has them filtered. In response, he skips over most of the text and criticizes the sender once he's finished.
• Freeze-Frame Bonus: During Homestar's Freak Out, he briefly appears as a pixel-art version of himself on the screen of the Lappy.
• Heh Heh, You Said "X": Self-imposed by Strong Bad when he chuckles at the "Some ants toot" line he created.
• Heroic BSoD: An Easter egg at the end shows Homestar in bed sobbing over the "long pants" debate.
• In-Character Commentaries: The DVD version contains a commentary by Homestar, Marzipan, and Shark-Tooth Bubs.
• Insistent Terminology: Homestar insists on calling light bulbs "light globes".
• Kids Are Cruel: The splash screen for Edga Jr. has a scowling boy saying "Indent and Die!".
• Kill It with Fire: The Cheat disposes of Homestar's "creepy pants" by setting them on fire with Strong Bad's BMW lighter.
• Long Pants: The Trope Namer, and discussed briefly between Homestar and Strong Bad.
  Homestar: What are you talking about, Strong Bad? I wear long pants.
  Strong Bad: Um, no... from what I can tell, you wear no pants, and have blue soles glued to the bottom of your feet.
• Malicious Misnaming: Strong Bad reads the sender's name as "Clanky" instead of "Clancy", and continues calling him that for the rest of the cartoon. The malice is more evident when Strong Bad scolds "Clanky" for suggesting the topic of Homestar's Long Pants.
• Never My Fault:
  • Strong Bad was the one who brought up the issue of Homestar's pants, and he insists on blaming Clancy for Homestar's Freak Out.
  • After realizing the difficulty he's going to have cleaning correction fluid off the Lappy's screen, Strong Bad orders the Cheat to "call tech support and tell them you broke the Lappy again!"
• Portmanteau: Strong Bad describes the mascot for Edga Jr. as "one of those red-haired raspscalli...wags."
• Toilet Humor: "'Some ants toot'... tee hee!"
• Wholesome Crossdresser: Implied in the character commentary, where Marzipan notes that the creepy pants Homestar wears in this email look a lot like one of her skirts.
  Homestar: Look, Marzipan, I don't wear your skirts anymore.
  Marzipan: I don't think that's true.
• Word-Salad Humor: Strong Bad's abridged edit of Clancy's email is a garbled mess of sentences that barely make sense.

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Homestar: (lying in bed sobbing, with light bulbs lying on his bed and on the floor around him) Loooonnng paaaannnts!
Marzipan: Awww, there there, Homestar. It's not so bad. Everybody thinks I'm a broom.
Homestar: (sits up suddenly, confused and slightly upset) You're not a broom?!