Original air date: 7/24/2002
All the recent reports of child abduction charges have Tweek growing paranoid (more than usual) of being abducted. After he almost does get abducted, the whole town goes to extreme lengths to protect their kids, including asking the owner of a local Chinese buffet to build a wall.
"Child Abduction is Not Funny" includes examples of:
- Abusive Parents: Tweek's parents; they worsened the poor kid's paranoia by pretending to be a child abductor disguised as a cop in an attempt to hammer in the point about not being able to trust anyone.
- Adults Are Useless: The parents response to the news of child abduction is to go to extreme and ridiculous lengths to keep them safe, with Stan even repeatedly calling them stupid for their actions.
- Affably Evil: The Mongolians go out of their way throughout the episode to torment Tuong Lu Kim for no real reason, but not only do they do it in very entertaining ways, but they're also kind enough to take care of the town's kids when they're abandoned by their parents.
- Affectionate Parody: The conflict between Tuong Lu Kim and the Mongolians bears similarity to something from a Looney Tunes cartoon (specifically, the Roadrunner/Wile E. Coyote cartoons).
- Bait-and-Switch: The Ghost of Human Kindness taking Tweek around to show him that there are good people in the world despite all the fearmongering news reports about kids not being safe... until it turns out that the Ghost of Human Kindness is a child abductor too.
- Butt-Monkey: Tuong Lu Kim as the Mongolians keep tearing down his wall and torture him in the process.
- A Day In The Lime Light: Tweek gets to be the focus for the first third of the episode until the Ghost of Human Kindness is arrested, then Tuong Lu Kim becomes the focus as he defends the city wall from Mongolians.
- Dude, Not Funny!: It's in the title itself.
- Foreshadowing:
- While trying to convince Mr. Kim to build the wall, Randy points out how his ancestors built a wall that kept Mongolians out for thousands of years. When Kim builds the wall, a group of Mongolians show up and break it down. Repeatedly.
- The Mongolians repeatedly break holes in the wall around South Park, but then turn back rather than actually invading the town, hinting at their true motives.
- Free-Range Children: The parents ultimately resort to letting their children live by themselves when it was reported that the most likely abductors of children are their own mother or father.
- Hero Antagonist: What the Mongolians turn out to be. Randy realizes at the end that building the wall was the wrong solution and the Mongolians had the right idea all along. They also take care of the children after the parents exile them.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: Happens to Lu Kim several times when building the wall around the city. For instance, when he fires a heat-seeking missile at the Mongolians, they throw a flaming baseball towards the wall, causing the missile to blow a large hole in it and injure Lu Kim in the process.
- I Resemble That Remark!: When the mayor of South Park asks Tuong Lu Kim to build a wall around South Park simply on the basis that he's Chinese, he takes great offense at being seen as a stereotype. He counters them by saying he's a normal person who "eats rice and drives really slow" just like everyone else and expresses it in his incredibly stereotypical Asian Speekee Engrish voice. And it's later shown he was in fact able to build a wall around the city in record time.
- Improperly Paranoid: The parents become increasingly paranoid thanks to the news reports; first by trying to ban outsiders from South Park, then by accompanying their children when they distrust their fellow neighbors, and finally banishing their kids when they can't trust themselves.
- Made of Iron: Tuong Lu Kim survives multiple explosions at point blank range and doesn't suffocate when trapped in the sweet and sour pork.
- No Sympathy: Stan, Cartman, and especially Kyle towards Tweek after him nearly getting abducted caused them to have to wear ridiculous helmets.
- Oh, Crap!: Tuong Lu Kim's resigned reaction when he realizes the kids set up explosives behind him...and the Mongolian chieftain's holding the detonator.
- Out of the Frying Pan: Every time the parents think they've solved the child abduction crisis, another probable abductor candidate comes to light. First, they had Tuong Lu Kim build a wall to keep strangers out of South Park, but a news study reveals that the majority of child abductions are actually committed by somebody the child knows in their own town. Then the parents start distrusting their own friends and accompanying their children everywhere they go, even at school. Then, another study reveals that nine out of every ten abduction cases are committed by the parents themselves, so the parents, being too suspicious of each other, ultimately let their children live on their own.
- Properly Paranoid: It's hard to blame Tweek for thinking everyone around him is a child abductor after his parents pretended to be child abductors pretending to be cops. And when the one guy who tried to restore his faith in people turned out to be an abductor himself.
- Rabble Rouser: When the conflict between Tuong Lu Kim and the Mongolians finally attracts the attention of the town, Randy stirs up the townspeople simply by saying the word "rabble" repeatedly.
- Road Runner vs. Coyote: The whole subplot with Tuong Lu Kim and the Mongolians. Lu Kim is trying to protect the wall around South Park from getting torn down by the Mongolians, and the Mongolians always outsmart him in hilariously cartoonish ways (often by turning his own methods against him) that result in Amusing Injuries for the chef.
- Rule of Funny: Why else would a group of Mongolians be in Colorado?
- "Shaggy Dog" Story: Lu Kim's attempts to defend the wall are all for naught as the adults realize that they don't need it anymore and request that he tears it down. Understandably, Lu Kim is not happy about this turn of events.
- Social Services Does Not Exist: The parents collectively banish all the kids from town out of fear that they themselves will abduct their own children! Even the mayor does not question this.
- Stop Being Stereotypical: Tuong Lu Kim gets understandably annoyed by the citizens of South Park telling him to build the wall solely because his Chinese ancestors built the Great Wall of China.
- Take That!: While Tweek is watching the news, one report is how Manhattan citizens are preparing to evacuate if Hilary Clinton's ass gets any bigger.
- Tempting Fate: The boys' parents tell them to act as they normally do at the bus stop. Let's just say the boys obliged.
- Too Clever by Half: Throughout the episode, Tuong Lu Kim continually springs Mongolian traps that only work because he expected the trap to be something else entirely.
- Trojan Horse: The Mongolians present one to Mr. Kim while he's preparing a large batch of sweet-and-sour pork to dump on them the next time he sees them. Mr. Kim sees that it's an obvious trap, just not the one he was expecting, as he is the one who ends up covered in sweet-and-sour pork. He's immobilized and the Mongolians break another hole in the city wall. Kim is eventually freed from the sticky pork by a hungry dog.
- Troll: The only intention the Mongolians seem to have is to annoy Tuong Lu Kim. Despite breaking the wall multiple times, they never once actually raid South Park.
- Villain Has a Point: At the end of the episode, the adults come to the conclusion that the man pretending to be the ghost of human kindness was right, not about what he did, but about what he said. He told Tweek that the world is not as awful as the media makes it out to be, and that people who do good don't receive the same type of attention as people who commit crimes.
- Was It Really Worth It?: After the increasingly paranoid and distrusting parents let the children leave on their own for parts unknown as their ultimate solution to the child abduction problem, the news happily reports that no child abductions have taken place for several days, as parents don't know where their children are. Sharon is left to wonder if they did the right thing.
- Yank the Dog's Chain: Right when Tweek was starting to trust people more, it turns out the guy who helped restore his faith was an actual abductor.
- You Meddling Kids: The Ghost of Human Kindness would have gotten away with kidnapping Tweek if it were for those meddling policemen.
