Stormy is still in denial, but Quinn and Shanks tell him to accept the truth-Marco is dead. Suddenly the door opens and everyone finds out Marco is Not Quite Dead. When they ask where he's been, Marco passes out.
Marco is recovering in bed and finds out everyone thought he was dead, they used mashed potatoes to make a corpse for his funeral, and Stormy thought he was reincarnated as a turtle.
Marco begins to tell the story of where he was the past six months: it started when he found a random bear trap in the middle of the ocean (that had been placed by Stormy and Sparks) and sprung it, trapping his leg. He tried to radio for help, but Stormy and Sparks ignored his radio. The blood had attracted a shark, who was backed up by a gang of sharks who provided the first one with a knife.
Before they could fight, though, the lost tribe of Snorkelles attacked and killed the shark. They would have killed Marco too if the scuba ninjas hadn't shown up. They attacked Marco, but Marco managed to kill them.
An earthquake delayed Marco for a minute, but soon he was heading back to Sealab. But then he saw something he couldn't describe. At first it looks like a Shout-Out to the Monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey, but it turns out to be an advertising board.
Inspired by an advertisement for shaved ice, Marco decided to go into the shaved ice business. At first, business was slow, due to it being wintertime, but business began to pick up in the summer. Marco asks a homeless crackhead to watch his stand while he takes a leak, and a robber promptly steals it, ruining Marco, who dumped his life savings into the business. Destitute, Marco came back to Sealab.
Oh, and how he lost an eye? A hooker knifed him.
Quinn finds the entire story ludicrous, but Marco tells him there's a big twist: it was all a hallucination.
Sharko comes in and is elated to finally meet his father, but Marco thinks he's a monster and shoots Sharko dead. He's shocked to learn he shot the son he never knew he had. But it turns out Sharko's still alive after all.
Marco expresses his pleasure at being back at Sealab, and he and Debbie sing "Waters of March (Águas de Março)" by Antonio Carlos Jobim. Marco compliments Debbie's Spanish, to which she informs him that they were singing in Portuguese.
The Stinger: Outtakes from Erik Estrada's (Marco) voice recording
