When a woman goes out with me, she is guaranteed three things. Well, four, actually, but the fourth is an optional extra.
The 1981 Christmas episode. First broadcast on 28 December 1981.
It's Christmas Day, but Rodney has ran out of yuletide cheer — all he's got to look forward to is Grandad's inedible Christmas dinner, the same old stuff on television, and nothing but a book lent to him by his friend Mickey Pierce called Body Language: The Lost Art.
When Grandad puts on his glad rags and heads to the OAPs' party at the community centre, Del and Rodney decide to go to a nightclub. Once there, Rodney puts his new-found knowledge of the unspoken language of love to use, but Del Boy has other ideas. As the brothers argue over whose technique is best, the objects of their affections are whisked away from under their noses.
Tropes:
- Christmas Episode: This is the first of the show's many Christmas specials, and the only one to be set entirely on Christmas Day.
- Cordon Bleugh Chef: Grandad's turkey is "slightly underdone" to the point of still being raw, and he forgot to remove the giblet bag before putting it in the oven. His potatoes, meanwhile, resemble "lumps of anthracite". Del admits that he only lets Grandad do the cooking so he feels he still has a purpose in life.
- Screw This, I'm Outta Here: Faced with a fairly dismal Christmas Day in the flat, Grandad decides to head out to the OAP party at the community centre ... much to Del's annoyance, as he'd previously chided Rodney for suggesting that they go out because that would've involved leaving the old man alone.
- Soapbox Sadie: Rodney, although his attempt to go on hunger strike in protest against American cruise missiles being based in Britain was half-hearted to say the least.Del: That was eight months ago. The missiles are still here. What is more to the point, Rodney, so are you! You went one and a half days on hunger strike, and then you sent out for a curry.Rodney: I was starving!Del: That's the idea of it, you plonker!
- Title, Please!: This is the only episode in which the title doesn't appear on-screen in any form.
