Title: Intermission (or: It's the Arts)
Original Airdate: 11/1/1970
Guest starring: Carol Cleveland, David Ballantyne
It's: A bunch of weirdos at a restaurant, someone selling an albatross in the stands, a man reporting his stolen coat to a police officer, a doctor insisting on pointing out who a man is talking to, a show about historical impersonations ("Historical Impersonations"), a show about police officers using magic, a man claiming to be Attila the Hun turning himself into the police, and a man who hears music that no one else can hear getting operated on.
Final episode of the first season.
ALBATROSS!:
- Bait-and-Switch: The headwaiter of the restaurant screams for a bit about it being a vegetarian restaurant and them not butchering a cow in various ways. It ends with this:Headwaiter: WE WOULDN'T DO IT! [calms down] Not for food, anyways.
- Blowing a Raspberry: Napoleon Bonaparte in a sketch about a man with people living in his stomach.
- Clown Car: The man hearing voices goes into surgery. It turns out that he has three hippies living in his stomach. The sketch ends with two policemen diving into the man's stomach to catch the hippies.
- Contrived Coincidence: The ad for the La Gondola restaurant always seems to advertise a certain thing just as the police are arresting the members involved with that thing.
- Either/Or Title: "Intermission (or: It's the Arts)"
- Embarrassing Damp Sheets: At one point in the restaurant sketch, the headwaiter mentions that he still wets his bed.
- I'm a Humanitarian: In the restaurant sketch, Jones is trussed up on a table and introduces himself as the special for the evening. He also advises the two prospective patrons not to eat the vicar also sitting in a pot in the restaurant.
- I See Them, Too: Mr. Notlob goes to a psychiatrist because he keeps hearing music (mostly folk songs) everywhere he goes; the psychiatrist starts talking about auditory hallucinations, and is startled when he hears "We're All Going to the Zoo Tomorrow".
- Napoleon Delusion: Mr. Phelps walks into the psychiatrist's office dressed as Napoleon.
- Recycled Set: The psychiatrist mentions that his surgeon friend has a similar as him. The only thing that's different is the picture has been Mustache Vandalized to look look like the new occupant.
- Running Gag:
- There will now be a [short/medium-sized/extra walloping long] intermission...
- ALBATROSS!
- Secret Squatter: A trio of people are found squatting in the body of a human body.
- Sex Sells: The Soho Motors ad has hot women draped over cars, the announcer uses vague language, and at the end it becomes clear it's an ad for an escort service disguised as a sexy car ad.
- Standard Snippet: The "INTERMISSION" cards are accompanied by Percy Faith and His Orchestra's rendition of "Theme from A Summer Place".
- The Stinger: After the credits roll the "INTERMISSION" card comes up again and John Cleese in voiceover promises that when the show returns, it will be a series on Irish agriculture.
- Strongly Worded Letter: As usual, Played for Laughs in true Python style:First Voiceover (Eric Idle): Dear Sir, I object very strongly to that last scene, and to the next letter.
Second Voiceover (Michael Palin): Dear Sir, I object to being objected to by the last letter, before my drift has become apparent. I spent many years in India during the last war and am now a part-time notice board in a prominent public school. Yours etc., Brigadier Zoe La Rue (deceased). PS Aghhh!
Third Voiceover (John Cleese): Dear Sir, When I was at school, I was beaten regularly every thirty minutes, and it never did me any harm - except for psychological maladjusunent and blurred vision. Yours truly, Flight Lieutenant Ken Frankenstein (Mrs). - Urban Fantasy: The police start using magic powers. They carry wands which they use to make illegally parked cars disappear and to teleport old ladies across the street.
- Who's on First?: "Me Doctor":Doctor: Mr. Burtenshaw?
Burtenshaw: Me, doctor?
Doctor: No, me doctor, you Mr. Burtenshaw.
Burtenshaw: My wife, Doctor?
Doctor: No, your wife patient, me doctor.
Sister: Come this way, please.
Burtenshaw: Me, sister?
Doctor: No, she sister, me doctor, you Mr. Burtenshaw.
Nurse: Dr. Walters?
Doctor: Me nurse. You Mr. Burtenshaw. She sister. You doctor.
Nurse: No, doctor.
Doctor: No doctor. Call ambulance, keep warm.
Nurse: Drink, doctor?
Doctor: Drink doctor. Eat sister. Cook Mr. Burtenshaw. Nurse me.
Nurse: You, doctor?
Doctor: Me doctor, you Mr. Burtenshaw, she nurse.
Burtenshaw: But my wife, nurse.
Doctor: Your wife not nurse. She nurse, your wife patient. Be patient. She nurse your wife. Me doctor. Yew tree. U-trecht, U-trillo, U Thant, Euphemism...me doctor. [knight hits him on the head with chicken] Albatross!
