A fourth-grade teacher from Crabapple Cove, who's a friend of Hawkeye's, sends the camp letters written by her students for he and the rest of the 4077 staff to respond to... though one of them writes a letter Hawkeye has a hard time dealing with.
Dear Virginia - this episode contains the following tropes:
- The Alcoholic: Irving (a dog), until Father Mulcahy cures him.
- Epic Fail: The Army was supposed to send the hospital a replacement surgeon while Charles was away (as B.J. explains in his letter); instead, it sends a lawyer.
- Flashback: Each letter answered, except for Charles', triggers a flashback.
- From the Mouths of Babes:Hawkeye: Essentially he's saying I'm a very large cog in the war machine. I'm not sure he's wrong.
Mulcahy: Hawkeye, do I need to point out that you don't take lives. You save them.
Hawkeye: I'm also in weapons repair. I fix people up so they can go out and get killed or kill other people. - Hair of the Dog: A variation - when he's showing Rosie and the other camp members he's cured Irving of being an alcoholic, Father Mulcahy says, "Actually, he's (Irving) having a bit of the hair of the man that bit him."
- Heroic BSoD: Hawkeye goes through one the entire episode when the letter he reads turns out to be from a young boy whose older brother was wounded in battle, stitched up by doctors, and sent back into battle again only to be killed, and the boy blames the doctors for this. Naturally, Hawkeye takes this personally.
- Hoist by His Own Petard: When Father Mulcahy tries to foist his letter on the doctors because it's asking how many lives they've saved, Hawkeye refuses, saying his rule is no one can trade letters. Later, when Hawkeye doesn't know how to answer the letter from Ronnie about his brother, he tries to foist the letter on Father Mulcahy, who tells him no dice. Admittedly, it's not because Hawkeye wouldn't let him do it before (though Father Mulcahy does bring it up), it's because Father Mulcahy knows Hawkeye needs to answer the letter himself, even if he doesn't realize it right away.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Charles sneers at the idea of answering the letters, and only agrees to do so when he's able to record snarky responses to the children that Klinger will transcribe later. However, when he gets a letter from a girl named Virginia, who lives in Maine, and sends a leaf from a birch tree, Charles is moved enough to write a letter himself, even though he brushes it off as "childishness" to Hawkeye and B.J..Dear (looks at letter) Virginia, it is with indescribable joy that I accept your gift. It is indeed testimony to the beauty that exists in all creation, but perhaps nowhere more than in a young girl's heart.
- Let Them Die Happy: Margaret's flashback is about a wounded soldier Margaret tends to who has only a few hours to live because his liver's gone. Rather than tell him, Margaret lets the patient talk about his farm, and the woman he plans on marrying when he gets home. A similar situation would be used with Nurse Kellye in "Hey, Look Me Over".
- Meaningful Name: The letter Charles reads that softens him is from Virginia — as in "Yes, Virginia".
- Mood Whiplash: The episode alternates between the comedy (or light-hearted nature) of the letters B.J., Father Mulcahy, Klinger, and Col. Potter answer, the drama of Hawkeye's letter, the heartwarming nature of the letter Charles answers, and the heartbreak involved with Margaret's letter.
- Narrative Profanity Filter: In-Universe: when Col. Potter is answering his letter, he starts out with "Hell, yes", before remembering who he's writing to, and changes it to, "Heck, yes."
- Oh, Crap!: B.J. and Hawkeye when they suspect their "replacement" surgeon may not be a replacement after all:B.J.: Are you afraid of what I'm afraid of?
Hawkeye: I'm afraid so. - Reflexive Response: When Bainbridge, the lawyer (see Epic Fail above), is in the OR helping Hawkeye and B.J. with a patient, Margaret, of course, says she objects to this because it's completely unprofessional; naturally, Hawkeye responds, "Objection overruled."
- Series Continuity Error: Father Mulcahy struggles to answer his first letter, claiming that as non-medical he hadn't saved any lives - forgetting that he had done so in "Mulcahy's War". Presumably the change was to avoid the episode being a Clip Show.
- Shout-Out to Shakespeare: Klinger's letter involves his attempt to raise chinchillas, which he plans to mate, and says they're looking at each other like Romeo and Juliet. Charles points out it's actually like Romeo and Mercutio, as both chinchillas are male.
- Vicious Cycle: The Aesop of Hawkeye's response to Ronnie."Ronnie, it's not a good idea to take the love you had for your brother and turn it into hate. Hate makes war, and war is what killed him. I understand your feelings; sometimes I hate myself for being here, but once in a while in the midst of all this insanity, a very small event can make my being here seem almost bearable. I'm sorry I don't have an answer for you, Ronnie, except to suggest that you look for good wherever you can find it."
- Voiceover Letter: The characters narrate their responses to the kids' letters in this manner.
