Original air date: May 8, 2005
Chris' teacher quits his job after winning the lottery during Parents' Night. Brian is initially hired to teach Chris' class, but ends up teaching a class of troubled, streetwise students. Meanwhile, Chris' infatuation with the new, blonde teacher turns into a plot to help her murder her husband.
This episode provides examples of:
- Bait-and-Switch:
- When Chris tells Lois he has a crush on his teacher, Peter responds in a manner suggesting that he can't believe what he's hearing ("Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa."), but it turns out he's gearing up to say, "Lois, this is not my Batman glass."
- Lois worries that Chris won't survive prison because of what they do to the inmates in the showers as seen on Oz. The cutaway shows the inmates singing The Merry Old Land of Oz, not getting raped as seen in the HBO prison drama that aired in the late 1990s.
- When Lana ends her relationship with Chris over his hesitation and vows to kill her husband herself, we see her asking him how his oatmeal tastes. At first, we suspect she may have poisoned him but then a close-up cutaway shows a bear lying close by to his oatmeal that attacks and kills him off-screen.
- Bears Are Bad News: Lana's husband is murdered by a bear.
- Book Dumb: The teenagers in Brian's class are this in spades. Summed up quite well by one of their reports on Great Expectations, quoted word for word:"Mrs. Havisham shouda throwed dat cake out, so it don't, like, mess up da bitches house".
- Brother–Sister Incest: Twice in the episode.
- First, it's implied some sort of sexual activity took place between famous brother-sister duo Donny and Marie Osmond as they are both lying in bed with looks of satisfaction and shame on their faces followed by their conversation:Donny: Uh... Marie?
Marie: (looks at him) Yeah, Donny?
Donny: Um... We cannot tell Mom! - The second example contains a in-verse Twincest joke where Peter is one-half of the Wonder Twins and when his twin sister Jayna leaves for battle (in the form of a hawk), Peter allows himself to magically turn into "Jayna's tampon" and hides himself in her purse so that when the time comes for her next menstrual cycle to begin...
- First, it's implied some sort of sexual activity took place between famous brother-sister duo Donny and Marie Osmond as they are both lying in bed with looks of satisfaction and shame on their faces followed by their conversation:
- Cassandra Truth: Chris denies killing Mrs. Lockhart's husband after he was mauled by a bear. At first, Lois does not believe the denial, but a newsreel of Mr. Lockhart being killed by a bear happens, making Lois see that Chris was being truthful.
- Didn't Think This Through: The Vincent van Gogh cutaway gag where he gives his ear to his wife. She says it will be an interesting story to tell their kids, only for Vincent to abashedly admit that he cut off his penis as well.
- Ear Ache: A Cutaway Gag of Vincent van Gogh giving his wife his severed ear is shown.
- Everyone Has Standards: The inner city kids aren't pleased with Brian using Ebonics to teach Shakespeare, calling it racist and ignorant.
- Eye Scream: Stewie's eye going blood red as he accidentally broke a blood vessel just farting.Stewie: Ahh! Broke a damn blood vessel!
- Freudian Slippery Slope: When Peter's talking to Mrs. Lockhart about Chris's infatuation with her:Peter: Sorry. Our son can sometimes be a boob. I mean a melon. I mean, a sopping-wet pair of breasts barely covered by a racing T-shirt.
- Groin Attack: A flashback depicts Vincent van Gogh giving a woman his ear, then his penis.
- Hot Teacher: Lana Lockhart, who entrances many of the students as well as Chris's father Peter.
- Interspecies Romance: Between Mrs. Lockhart and the bear at the end of the episode.
- Mood Whiplash: One scene goes from Chris reacting horrified to the idea of having to kill Mr. Lockhart to immediately showing Stewie in face cream and hair rollers yelling at him about how late it is at night.
- Murder the Hypotenuse: Lana tells Chris if they want to be together, he would have to kill her husband.
- Nominal Coauthor: In a Cutaway Gag, Matt Damon finishes writing Good Will Hunting and Ben Affleck asks for a co-writing credit. Damon angrily claims that Affleck did nothing but eat ice cream and smoke pot the entire time.
- Noodle Incident:
- Chris lists two incidents to his parents when they accuse him of murdering Mr. Lockhart (namely, lying about his age to get into a casino and soiling himself).
- When Remedial English student teen parent Amanda goes into labor, another teen parent asks if she could have this one. Her reason being because her mother keeps giving her kids away.
- Pretty Fly for a White Guy: Brian tries to be this in order to teach the inner-city kids better. It doesn't go so well as two kids point out how racist he looks.
- Shout-Out:
- The episode's title is a reference to the high school film "Fast Times at Ridgemont High".
- Mrs. Lockheart gives a lesson on Nineteen Eighty-Four. 1984 is also the name of a Van Halen album which contains the song "Hot for Teacher", which has a music video which features a female teacher stripping.
- While teaching Romeo and Juliet, Brian puts on a fake urban hip-hop persona and calls Tupac Shakur and The Notorious B.I.G. his boys. Brian says that Biggie and Tupac represented the West side, even though both of them are from the East but only Tupac represented the West.
- After Peter gets amnesia in a flashback, he thinks he's Larry from Three's Company. It later happens again.
- The Griffins are about to watch Joan of Arcadia but are interrupted by the news.
- Stewie compares Peter’s underwear to a Jackson Pollock painting.
- The opening credits are a parody of those of Law & Order, and were narrated by Steven Zirnkilton, opening credits narrator for all L&O series. Note that the Greased-up Deaf Guy was included in the “Order” section of the opening, reserved for lawyers on Law & Order; he mentions that he was previously a lawyer in "North by North Quahog".
- In March 1991, Pamela Smart seduced a sixteen-year-old boy and convinced him to kill her husband, in the same way Mrs. Lockheart tries to seduce Chris, he’s interested in her but doesn’t kill her husband.
- The green slime Peter gets when he says "I don't know" followed by the music and the title screen is from the kids' sketch comedy show You Can't Do That on Television.
- Lois calls Brian "Mr. Kot-tair!" as in Welcome Back, Kotter.
- A scene depicts Ben Affleck and Matt Damon arguing over whether Matt should credit Ben on the first copy of Good Will Hunting script, in a nod to the actual controversy over whether both Ben and Matt wrote the Oscar-winning screenplay.
- Brian dresses in costume, as Mark Twain when they read The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, while teaching like Richard Mulligan in Teachers (1984).
- Brian's students are similar to the students in Dangerous Minds, and Brian's subplot on teaching these students is based on the film’s plot itself.
- While Stewie is doing the robot, he says, "Let’s see the kid with the hearing aid from Barney do this". One of the regulars on Barney & Friends was a near-deaf youth who appeared early in the series.
- Lois confuses the prison drama Oz with The Wizard of Oz.
- Brian's students get up on the desks and recite Walt Whitman's "O Captain! My Captain!", as the students do in Dead Poets Society.
- Sir Not-Appearing-in-This-Trailer: Despite the promise in the opening credits, the Greased-up Deaf Guy does not appear in the episode.
- Take That!:
- Stewie says he had a dream where he was hatched by Elisabeth Hasselbeck, a co-host on The View.
- One joke aimed at the Osmond siblings regarding Chris' impulsive behavior towards his teacher:
Mrs. Lana Lockhart: Chris, you can't be so impulsive! People have gotten into a lot of trouble that way!
(cutaway gag to siblings Donny and Marie lying in bed together post-coital as a result of "impulsive behavior") - Teacher/Student Romance: Chris immediately develops a crush on Mrs. Lana Lockhart the moment he meets her.
- Teen Pregnancy: One of Brian's students from remedial English, Amanda, is a young teen mother whose water breaks during the students introduction.
- Tough Love: In a cutaway, Peter makes an indoor water slide down the stairs and hurts himself using it and starts moaning in pain. Brian tells him he's not calling the hospital because he knew Peter wouldn't learn anything if he did.
- Vandalism Backfire: Peter and Chris egg Brian's house after Brian gives Chris an F, forgetting that it was their own house.
- Victoria's Secret Compartment: Lana Lockhart can hide many items in her bosom, school tests, a piece of chalk and a sword.
- Visual Innuendo: When Mrs. Lockhart presents Chris with his grades, he stares at the grade right next to her boobs, then answers:Mrs. Lana Lockhart: What do you see here, Chris?Chris Griffin: Two 'D's and an F.
