Tina struggles to find inspiration while trying to write a new school song for Wagstaff; Jimmy Pesto's shiny new steel awning proves to be a nuisance to Bob and Linda.
Wag the Tropes:
- Awesome, yet Impractical: Jimmy's new steel awning. Not only does it shine too much light into Bob's restaurant, it also makes it hot and echo-y inside Jimmy's. Jimmy didn't want to take it down because A) it was too expensive (it was made from old Ferrari bumpers) and B) it was making Bob miserable.
- Bird-Poop Gag: Bob tries to ruin Jimmy's awning by throwing bread crumbs on it so seagulls would gather there and do their business on it, coating it in enough bird crap to stop it from reflecting light into his restaurant.
- Blinded by the Light: Bob tries to get back at Jimmy for his awning by reflecting the sun into eyes by using his bathroom mirror, but accidentally reflects it at Trev.
- Brutal Honesty: Frond cuts off Jocelyn's song by saying he hates it. He later tells everyone practicing in the music room that their songs are crap.
- Continuity Nod: When Tina goes to the basketball game to record applause, we see that Jimmy Jr. still can't run.
- Dark Horse Victory: Instead of Tina or Louise and Gene winning the song contest, the prize instead goes to Jimmy Jr. and Zeke who put in sincere effort but have a very questionable chorus.
- Didn't Think This Through:
- Mr. Frond realizes too late that letting kids write and choose the new school song was a bad idea. Louise lampshades it to her siblings, stating that of course the kids are all going to make the songs as dumb, offensive and as inappropriate as they can get away with. By the end, Mr. Frond has to rig the voting to ensure the least offensive song wins, and even then the system has collapsed so badly the winner isn't that great anyways.
- Tammy's song lists all the current students, meaning it would become outdated within a year even if it somehow won. Also, saying every student's name means her song takes forever, and Tammy's completely winded at the end.
- Dreadful Musician: As it turns out, 99% of Wagstaff. Even the ones who can make good music don't want to—Gene, who previous episodes show is a genuinely talented musician, is more interested in helping Louise exploit the flaws of Frond's system in order to make the official school song about pee and poop.
- Epic Fail: Tammy's list of every Wagstaff student somehow left out Jocelyn, who she has to add in at the end.
- Evil Laugh: Louise after Frond confirms the students will be both writing the new anthem and be picking the winner, having spotted the exploitable flaw in his idea.Louise: (to herself) You fool. (to Frond) Nothing, I just thought of something funny.
- Explain, Explain... Oh, Crap!: Mr. Frond has this when he realizes that children aren't good song writers, and because of the ill-thought out way he presented his idea, one of the kid's crappy songs will become the new school anthem.Mr. Frond: Your songs are crap! (Gene gasps) I'm just now realizing that children aren't good song writers and— Oh my God, one of these is gonna win!Louise: (matter-of-factly) Ours.
- Flashback Cut: When Tina gets Frond the recording of the applause from the basketball game, she tells him it took a while for both teams to score a point. We then get a quick flashback of Tina yelling at the players for taking too long to score a point.
- Freudian Slip: When Mr. Frond calls Tina up to the stage to sing, he accidentally calls her the "winner" in advance before realizing and correcting himself.
- Innocent Innuendo: Jimmy Jr. and Zeke's song is about how they love Wagstaff and want to
"be inside you." - Instantly Proven Wrong: When Bob and Linda try to block the sun by putting newspapers on the windows, Bob points out that it makes them look abandoned. Linda doesn't think so until one customer comes to give his condolences and thinks the "still open" written on the papers is meant to be ironic, quickly followed by a realtor preparing to assess the property for sale, causing Bob to tear down the newspapers and blind everyone.
- It Amused Me: After Jimmy admits he hates his metal awning because it makes his restaurant hot underneath it and it's echo-y, he then admits that one of the reasons he kept it was that it made Bob miserable.
- Legacy Seeker: Tina wants to win the contest because the winner gets their name engraved on a plaque, allowing her to leave her mark on the school and be remembered by "future kids and cool robots."
- Limited Lyrics Song: Louise and Gene's song is just "The Pee-Pee and the Poo-Poo", while Jocelyn's is just her going "Whoa" repeatedly (she claims to like when songs have a small section that does this, so naturally she decided an entire song needed it).
- List Song: Tammy's song is just a list of all the students, except for Jocelyn. She's exhausted and winded by the end of it.
- Never My Fault: When Bob intends to reflect the sun back in Jimmy Pesto's eyes, he has Teddy tell him when Jimmy passes by. When Teddy does give the order, Bob ends up hitting Trev... and Teddy proceeds to ask Bob why he aimed at Trev, even though Teddy just told him to (which Bob naturally points out).
- Noodle Incident:
- Tina once got tangled in a jump rope for five hours.Gene: You were our school's Baby Jessica.
- Mr. Frond's last bad idea was "Bring a Stranger to School" Day, and it apparently didn't go well.Jocelyn: I miss my stranger. She had chicken in her pockets.
- Tina once got tangled in a jump rope for five hours.
- Oblivious Guilt Slinging: Rudy says it's an honor just to be competing in a fair contest. Tina, who's just rigged the applause meter, has a minor panic attack.
- Picture Day: The episode opens on the Belcher kids getting their school pictures. Tina's is just a doodle on a Post-It note, because she always misses Picture Day due to having the flu. One flashback shows her finally about to get her picture taken, only to bend over to throw up at the last second.
- Reluctant Retiree: When Mr. Frond holds the assembly to announce "a surprise forced retirement", Ms. LaBonz initially thought he was talking about her.Ms. LaBonz: You sons of bitches! This is how you spring it on me?! I'm not going anywhere!
Mr. Frond: No, no, no. Ms. LaBonz, not you.
Ms. LaBonz: Oh. (Sits down) - Shout-Out:
- The Pop-Culture Pun Episode Title is a reference to Wag the Dog.
- The Store Next Door is Hannah and Her Transistors Electronics.
- Regular-Sized Rudy plans to just talk-sing his song, mentioning The B-52s' "Love Shack" as an example.
- When Bob tries to use his own mirror to blind Jimmy Pesto, he compares it to the Death Star. Teddy also compares Bob to an Ewok due to his hairiness.
- The Burger of the Day is In Ricotta da Vida.
- Skewed Priorities: When Bob nails Trev with a beam of light, Jimmy is more focused on the linguini that he spilled.
- Snub by Omission: Jocelyn is quick to point out that she wasn't mentioned in Tammy's song. Tammy shoehorns her name in at the end to make her happy.
- Solar-Powered Magnifying Glass: Jimmy's steel awning reflects sunlight right into Bob's Burgers, making it unbearably hot and bright.
- Something Only They Would Say: Louise suspects someone else wrote Tina's song for her, since it has a lot of big words that she likely wouldn't have used on her own. It's when Louise hears Mr. Frond use one of the words in the song ("stalwart") that she realizes it was Frond who did it.
- Stating the Simple Solution: Due to Jimmy's metal awning reflecting the sun at his restaurant, Bob has Teddy hold a flat cardboard on the window to block it until the sun moves. Teddy points out that they could just use tape to hold the cardboard on the window, but because Teddy is such a nice guy, he decides to hold it anyway despite the sun making the cardboard hot enough to burn his hands and Bob and Linda telling him to just let go.
- Stylistic Suck: It comes as no surprise that the children's songs are various types of awful, whether it's bad singing or ill thought out lyrics.
- Suspiciously Specific Denial: Frond awards Peter for winning the Wagstaff Checkers Tournament with a giant checker that's definitely not a hockey puck from lost and found.
- Take a Third Option: After Bob and Jimmy Pesto both agree that the awning is too much of a pain in the ass for both of them to leave in place, Teddy suggests remodeling it into a replacement urinal for the broken one Jimmy has in his restaurant's bathroom. Jimmy asks if they're seriously suggesting turning something that's made out of old Ferrari bumpers into an urinal because he thinks it's a great idea that makes his bathroom even classier, while Bob and Linda are both eager to pee on it due to all the pain it's caused them so far.
- Thing-O-Meter: Frond uses an applause meter to choose the winning song. Louise quickly sees the obvious flaw in this plan, as kids will clap loudest at the silliest, most inappropriate song, and sets out with Gene to write such a song.
- Toilet Humor: Gene and Louise's song consists of nothing but the words "the pee-pee and the poo-poo" over and over again. Because the other students are as immature as they are, they think it's a guaranteed win for the contest.
- Triumphant Reprise: During the credits, Jimmy Jr. and Zeke sing their school song with rock music in the background while Gene and Louise sing their song in-between.
- Values Dissonance: In-Universe. The reason the old Wagstaff school song was being retired was because of its frequent and rather graphic references to whaling.Louise: I always thought it was kind of jazzy.
- Vocal Range Exceeded: Courtney tries to sing a high D in her song, but can't hit it. When she sings it in front of the school, she seems to hit it until she starts coughing up after straining her voice.
- Well-Intentioned Extremist: Discussed after Mr. Frond writes Tina's song for her and has Tina record applause to rig the competition, all so that their non-offensive song wins the competition.Tina: Are we bad?
Frond: We're not great, but we mean really well.
