Quotes / Women Drivers

They'll put you behind bars
We're not playin' bumper cars
Did a great figure eight
In the middle of the interstate
Tires squeal wherever we go
Even hitchhikers just say "NO!"''

— "Weird Al" Yankovic, "She Drives Like Crazy"

Women together cannot keep silent in a car, and when women talk they have to look into each other’s faces. An exchange of words is not enough. They have to see the other person’s expression... So two women in the front seat of a car constantly distract each other’s attention from the road ahead and four women are more than doubly dangerous for the driver not only has to hear and see, what her companion is saying but also, for women are like that, what the two behind are talking about.

—Ian Fleming, Thunderball

I think this may be the first time Lindsay Lohan will receive a check from an automotive insurance company that has nothing to do with an accident she caused...And I guess this commercial is being filmed entirely in front of a green screen, since Lindsay Lohan can’t go within 10 feet of a car without the collision insurance skyrocketing to $4.3 million. Unless Esurance has a huge-ass budget for this thing, in which case they might even let her sit in the front seat with the keys in the ignition. And just like that, every vehicle in the Long Beach area just got very, very nervous.

—Michael K., "Lindsay Lohan Got A Job Shooting A Car Insurance Commercial"

I didn't think it was possible for God to invent a worse driver than Lindsay Lohan, but here you go. [Amanda] Bynes spent all of 2012 avoiding acting gigs and trying desperately to run over your dog. And yet she isn't anywhere close to being as fascinating a train wreck as Lohan. I could watch Lohan implode for years and years, yet Bynes merits only a token shrug. Step up your game, missy. Sometime in the near future, there's a sensational vehicular-manslaughter trial with your name on it!

—Drew Magary, "The Least Influential People of 2012"

Motor Ed: Dude, never get a woman angry when she's driving; it'll only make it worse. Her driving, that is.

(Death Glare from Shego as Drakken makes Oh, Crap! gestures behind her back. Cue Hand Blast)

— Kim Possible

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