The turmoil that broke out from our orderly room was indescribable. The Colonel, that kindly, vulture-faced man who had looked Japanese guards in the face on the Moulmein Railway and said "No," now became visibly agitated for the first time in living memory; he took me aside, addressed me as "Young Dand", twisted his moustache, and spoke rapidly and incoherently about the importance of putting on a good show. The Adjutant got on the other side of me and rattled instructions into my ear, impressing the necessity of perfect organization, split-second timing, immaculate appearance, and perfect coordination. He gave me to understand that the slightest slip would mean the ruin of the regimental reputation and my own personal destruction, and exhorted me to keep calm.
Kryten: There is no need to engage your panic chip, sir. The machine can only operate on organic life. I am mineral, and therefore immune.
Computer: New genetic structure accepted. Metamorphosis in ten seconds and counting.
Kryten: Oh. Wait a minute. No. My brain is part organic and therefore it is entirely possible for the machine to transmogrify my physical condition. Engage panic circuits. Panic circuits engaged. Bwa-ha!
Computer: New genetic structure accepted. Metamorphosis in ten seconds and counting.
Kryten: Oh. Wait a minute. No. My brain is part organic and therefore it is entirely possible for the machine to transmogrify my physical condition. Engage panic circuits. Panic circuits engaged. Bwa-ha!
— Red Dwarf, "DNA"
Sam: HELIX! WE'VE CAMPED IN AN ASTEROID DROP ZONE!!
Helix: I vote that we panic.
Sam: I also vote that we panic.
Florence: Sam, we shouldn't panic.
Sam: Two votes to one. The motion to panic has been carried. Screaming and flailing may start immediately.
Helix: I vote that we panic.
Sam: I also vote that we panic.
Florence: Sam, we shouldn't panic.
Sam: Two votes to one. The motion to panic has been carried. Screaming and flailing may start immediately.
— Freefall
Okay, I thought. I'm not going to panic. I'm going to take a deep breath - okay, I'm not going to take a deep breath, but I'm going to count to ten, and take stoke, and I'm going to stay calm.
"I died," I recalled, mouthing the words airlessly. "Oh well. Could happen to anyone. Everyone, even. And now I've come back to life. So I can't exactly complain, can I? I'm in a coffin. That's where they put dead people. It makes sense. Ho hum. There's no air in here. La de dah. Who needs air? Not me, anymore, apparently. My body seems to have been wasting away for many years. Well I never."
A loud rumbling from deep within the bowels of the earth shut me up. The ground shook violently. I could feel the spiders in my lungs clinging to alveoli for dear life.
"And there's an earthquake going on. Fiddle de RAARGH LET ME OUT LET ME OUT-"
NO! Not in the Soup!.... [to himself] Okay Ruff, don't panic... [searches through his book frantically] Okay, big stars, big stars, Oh please, please, stars, stars, stars, okay.. [reads words on page] "see planetarium" OKAY, TIME TO PANIC!...
— Ruff Ruffman, FETCH! with Ruff Ruffman
