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Anime and Manga
Dandy: Hey stranger, time for an intro. So, what's your name?
Nynamo: Nynamo.
Dandy: Say what?
QT: Could you repeat that?
Nynamo: Nynamo.
Dandy: Huh!? What is that?
QT: Who knows?
Nynamo: Jeez, it's a common name...
Dandy: Well, in honor of you looking like a cat, how about... Meow?
Nynamo: Oh come on, you guys. Don't do me like that. I'm a Betelgeusian!
Dandy: [quietly to QT] Whatever, he is totally a space cat.
Nynamo: No I'm not! Dammit!
Nynamo: Nynamo.
Dandy: Say what?
QT: Could you repeat that?
Nynamo: Nynamo.
Dandy: Huh!? What is that?
QT: Who knows?
Nynamo: Jeez, it's a common name...
Dandy: Well, in honor of you looking like a cat, how about... Meow?
Nynamo: Oh come on, you guys. Don't do me like that. I'm a Betelgeusian!
Dandy: [quietly to QT] Whatever, he is totally a space cat.
Nynamo: No I'm not! Dammit!
— Space☆Dandy, "Live With the Flow, Baby"
Comic Books
Atomic Robo: How do you pronounce that?
Doctor Dinosaur: The way it is spelled: H'SSSSK!
Robo: What, seriously? Is that a name or is something stuck in your throat?
Dr. Dino: It is a good and proper name!
Robo: "Hhhthhhk?" C'mon, it sounds like you've got a hairball.
Dr. Dino: H'SSSSK! It is H'SSSSK! Not "Hhthhhk"! Completely different!
Doctor Dinosaur: The way it is spelled: H'SSSSK!
Robo: What, seriously? Is that a name or is something stuck in your throat?
Dr. Dino: It is a good and proper name!
Robo: "Hhhthhhk?" C'mon, it sounds like you've got a hairball.
Dr. Dino: H'SSSSK! It is H'SSSSK! Not "Hhthhhk"! Completely different!
— Atomic Robo, "Why Doctor Dinosaur Hates Atomic Robo"
Del Portus' wife(?): PQWRSTL!?
— W817
note , issue #11
note , issue #11 Fan Works
"My name is unpronounceable by Earthlings when sober," said the man from Mars.
OGiNiM paused, then turned to me and muttered: "Krack kedaan...?"
I laughed; shook my head. "Graag gedaan."
"Khra...?"
"Not exactly. Try to bring your tongue to the back of your mouth so that you cut off the airflow." I replicated the sound.
A bunch of weird growling noises came in my direction. When I looked over at OGiNiM again, he was looking in a mirror and shining a flashlight down his throat. I laughed.
"What are you doing?"
OGiNiM replied quickly:
"Looking for my uvula. What do you think, Mijnheer? The only way to pronounce this sound is to choke yourself!"
I laughed; shook my head. "Graag gedaan."
"Khra...?"
"Not exactly. Try to bring your tongue to the back of your mouth so that you cut off the airflow." I replicated the sound.
A bunch of weird growling noises came in my direction. When I looked over at OGiNiM again, he was looking in a mirror and shining a flashlight down his throat. I laughed.
"What are you doing?"
OGiNiM replied quickly:
"Looking for my uvula. What do you think, Mijnheer? The only way to pronounce this sound is to choke yourself!"
Film
Mr. Brown: What's your name? Do bears even have names?
Paddington: Of course we do! My name is [rrrRRROOOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!click].
Mr. Brown: ...I beg your pardon?
Paddington: [rrrRRROOOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!click].
Mr. Brown: ...Right.
Paddington: Well, go on. You try it. Back of the throat.
Mr. Brown: [reluctantly] BrrrRRRRRRRrrrrr?
Paddington: [coldly] ...Mr. Brown. That is extremely rude.
Paddington: Of course we do! My name is [rrrRRROOOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!click].
Mr. Brown: ...I beg your pardon?
Paddington: [rrrRRROOOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!click].
Mr. Brown: ...Right.
Paddington: Well, go on. You try it. Back of the throat.
Mr. Brown: [reluctantly] BrrrRRRRRRRrrrrr?
Paddington: [coldly] ...Mr. Brown. That is extremely rude.
Allen: What's your name?
Madison: It's hard to say in English.
Allen: Well, just say it in your language.
Madison: Alright. My name is... [makes shrill porpoise noises that shatter all the glass around them]
Madison: It's hard to say in English.
Allen: Well, just say it in your language.
Madison: Alright. My name is... [makes shrill porpoise noises that shatter all the glass around them]
Literature
I was spawned uncounted aeons ago, in the dark mists of Khhaa'yngnaiih (no, of course I don't know how to spell it. Write it as it sounds), of nameless nightmare parents, under a gibbous moon.
— I, Cthulhu by Neil Gaiman
She was called Victoria, because she had beaten us in battle, seven hundred years before, and she was called Gloriana, because she was glorious, and she was called the Queen, because the human mouth was not shaped to say her true name.
Demon: My name is unpronounceable in your tongue, woman.
Granny Weatherwax: I'll be the judge of that. Don't you call me woman.
Demon: Very well. My name is WxrtHltl-jwlpklz.
Nanny Ogg: Where were you when the vowels were handed out? Behind the door?
Granny Weatherwax: Well, Mr WxrtHltl-jwlpklz, I expect you're wondering why we called you here tonight.
Granny Weatherwax: I'll be the judge of that. Don't you call me woman.
Demon: Very well. My name is WxrtHltl-jwlpklz.
Nanny Ogg: Where were you when the vowels were handed out? Behind the door?
Granny Weatherwax: Well, Mr WxrtHltl-jwlpklz, I expect you're wondering why we called you here tonight.
"My name is—" the sound was the rustling of fronds, "but you can easier call me Blueshell. It's nice to see a familiar face, hahaha." Blueshell spoke the laughter as words.
Live-Action TV
Maj. Thornberg: What was the weapon you used?
Col. O'Neill: [innocently] Weapon?
Maj. Thornberg: Our cameras saw some sort of weapon.
Col. O'Neill: Oh. Well, it's hard to say.
Maj. Thornberg: Some sort of state secret?
Col. O'Neill: No, just difficult to pronounce.
Col. O'Neill: [innocently] Weapon?
Maj. Thornberg: Our cameras saw some sort of weapon.
Col. O'Neill: Oh. Well, it's hard to say.
Maj. Thornberg: Some sort of state secret?
Col. O'Neill: No, just difficult to pronounce.
— Stargate SG-1, "1969" (regarding the Zat'nik'tel)
"No, we're not all doomed, one man here still has a chance. One man, can take a stand for all of us. And that man's name is F- well, we can't pronounce his real name, so we call him Fez!"
— Eric, That '70s Show
Spike: Oh, balls! You didn't say the thing was a Glarghk Guhl Kashma'nik.
Xander: That's 'cause I can't say Glarma— [demon hits him]
Bobo: And your name, sir?
Prince: My name has no sound. It's unpronounceable. [takes out an album cover with "Love Symbol #2" on it]
Bobo: Okay, Dr. Rorschach, this kind of monkey business might have kept you out of the draft, but it ain't gonna fool me.
Prince: My name has no sound. It's unpronounceable. [takes out an album cover with "Love Symbol #2" on it]
Bobo: Okay, Dr. Rorschach, this kind of monkey business might have kept you out of the draft, but it ain't gonna fool me.
Radio
Douglas: Where is this Kicky-Tarry-Jack, anyway?
Carolyn: Are you referring to Qikiqtarjuaq?
Douglas: [long pause; frostily] ...You're really proud of yourself for having learnt to say that, aren't you?
Carolyn: [smug] Yes!
Carolyn: Are you referring to Qikiqtarjuaq?
Douglas: [long pause; frostily] ...You're really proud of yourself for having learnt to say that, aren't you?
Carolyn: [smug] Yes!
— Cabin Pressure, "Qikiqtarjuaq"
Video Games
???: I'm ♥♪!?, but it's hard to pronounce so... Call me "Geno", after the doll.
Connor: My name is Ratohnhaké:ton.
Achilles: Right... well I'm not even going to try to pronounce that.
Achilles: Right... well I'm not even going to try to pronounce that.
"Transma-ma-ma-ma... malig- whatever his name is, that motherfucker's dead!"
— Samuel L. Jackson on the transmutantstein, Heroes of Newerth
Smuggler: You two will be back together before you can say "a vrblther's vibroblade."
Corso: A... a vrblth... vrblth... so, not that soon, then?
Corso: A... a vrblth... vrblth... so, not that soon, then?
Webcomics
Most mortals are incapable of even hearing the names of demons, never mind such niceties as pronouncing them. Sometimes highly trained musicians will pick up a few syllables, and echoes of the names have been known to haunt the dreams of the newly deaf. For no reason known to anyone, armadillos can hear them easily, although they generally just roll up into a ball.
"Hello. My name can only be expressed by focusing pure waves of heat into a form of communication deadly to your kind."
— Fire elemental, Speak With Monsters
Web Animation
Challenge: Who can pronounce Susan’s last name correctly?
[Round 1 begins]
SMG4: Woga-Wogadoo?
[Buzzer rings]
Harambe: WRONG! [Flamethrowers SMG4]
SMG3: Wubsywubsywowwow?
[Buzzer rings again]
SMG3: Ah! Please don’t hurt me!
[Beat where nothing happens, SMG3 sighs in relief]
Godzilla: Hello there! [Falls on and crushes SMG3]
SMG4: Wojikikikikikikikiki-
[Buzzer rings again]
Kermit: This is Kermit the frog. [Hits SMG4 with hammer]
SMG3: Windex?
[Buzzer rings again]
Slenderman: [Grabs and beats up SMG3 You are dead.
[Round 5 beginning, then cut to round 10, then 35]
[Camera shows SMG4 tied up and on fire watching Anime Mario dance]
[Camera shows SMG3 screaming in pain as a 100-pound weight sits on his groin]
[Round 262 beginning, then cut to round 571, then 4633, then 400010231]
[SMG4 and SMG3 gasping for breath as all of the onlookers are now Waiting Skeletons. One skeleton falls over, revealing Whimpu behind them]
Whimpu: Use text-to-speak!
[SMG4 and SMG3 both pull out their phones and quickly start typing]
Siri: Susan Wo-[Starts glitching]-kikikikiki-
[Both of their phones explode]
[Round 1 begins]
SMG4: Woga-Wogadoo?
[Buzzer rings]
Harambe: WRONG! [Flamethrowers SMG4]
SMG3: Wubsywubsywowwow?
[Buzzer rings again]
SMG3: Ah! Please don’t hurt me!
[Beat where nothing happens, SMG3 sighs in relief]
Godzilla: Hello there! [Falls on and crushes SMG3]
SMG4: Wojikikikikikikikiki-
[Buzzer rings again]
Kermit: This is Kermit the frog. [Hits SMG4 with hammer]
SMG3: Windex?
[Buzzer rings again]
Slenderman: [Grabs and beats up SMG3 You are dead.
[Round 5 beginning, then cut to round 10, then 35]
[Camera shows SMG4 tied up and on fire watching Anime Mario dance]
[Camera shows SMG3 screaming in pain as a 100-pound weight sits on his groin]
[Round 262 beginning, then cut to round 571, then 4633, then 400010231]
[SMG4 and SMG3 gasping for breath as all of the onlookers are now Waiting Skeletons. One skeleton falls over, revealing Whimpu behind them]
Whimpu: Use text-to-speak!
[SMG4 and SMG3 both pull out their phones and quickly start typing]
Siri: Susan Wo-[Starts glitching]-kikikikiki-
[Both of their phones explode]
Web Video
Travis in Duluth, MN: Ah, hi! I was just wondering: how do you pronounce your name?
Cthulhu: What?
Travis in Duluth, MN: Well I was looking it up online, and I found several different pronunciations. I was just wondering...
Cthulhu: Kid, do you have nine tongues?
Travis in Duluth, MN: What?!
Cthulhu: Tongues, kid. Do you have nine of 'em?
Travis in Duluth, MN: Well—
Cthulhu: Is your mouth more than six feet wide?
Travis in Duluth, MN: Well, no.
Cthulhu: Then give it up! It's an alien language; your little skin-flap of a mouth can't handle it. Besides it's more of a mental thing than an actual word, so just...give it up. Next caller! You're on with us again for Calls for... um, me.
Cthulhu: What?
Travis in Duluth, MN: Well I was looking it up online, and I found several different pronunciations. I was just wondering...
Cthulhu: Kid, do you have nine tongues?
Travis in Duluth, MN: What?!
Cthulhu: Tongues, kid. Do you have nine of 'em?
Travis in Duluth, MN: Well—
Cthulhu: Is your mouth more than six feet wide?
Travis in Duluth, MN: Well, no.
Cthulhu: Then give it up! It's an alien language; your little skin-flap of a mouth can't handle it. Besides it's more of a mental thing than an actual word, so just...give it up. Next caller! You're on with us again for Calls for... um, me.
So, uh... How do you pronounce music notes? Why does this game have emojis?
Jax: Seriously, is that, like, Russian? Scandinavian? Pig Latin?
Sarge: My family history ain't part of the deal.
Jax: How do you even spell it? Sounded like 57 syllables.
Sarge: Well, you need a Mandarin keyboard to get it exactly right, and the fifth letter is an emoji.
Sarge: My family history ain't part of the deal.
Jax: How do you even spell it? Sounded like 57 syllables.
Sarge: Well, you need a Mandarin keyboard to get it exactly right, and the fifth letter is an emoji.
— Red vs. Blue, Sarge's original name
Western Animation
Marge: That's very generous of you, Mr...
Alien: To pronounce it correctly, I would have to... pull out your tongue.
Marge: Ugh.
Alien: To pronounce it correctly, I would have to... pull out your tongue.
Marge: Ugh.
Blinky: Not a rock. Dwärkstone.
Jim: Dork-stone?
Blinky: Dwärkstone.
Claire: Dork-stone?
Aaarrrgghh!!!: Close enough.
Blinky: Dwärkstone is incredibly rare, highly volatile, and the only guaranteed way to expel a gruesome.
Toby: All I'm hearing is "dork-stone."
Jim: Dork-stone?
Blinky: Dwärkstone.
Claire: Dork-stone?
Aaarrrgghh!!!: Close enough.
Blinky: Dwärkstone is incredibly rare, highly volatile, and the only guaranteed way to expel a gruesome.
Toby: All I'm hearing is "dork-stone."
Mxyzptlk: Okay, I'll give you a rule; you make me say, spell or otherwise reveal my name backwards, and I'll split until our dimensions come into alignment again in about, oh, three months, give or take.
Clark Kent: I can't even say your name forward, how am I supposed to say it backwards?
Clark Kent: I can't even say your name forward, how am I supposed to say it backwards?
Real Life
"... I told you to get used to hearing that name, and if possible, get used to saying it."
— Herman Cain on Rod Blagojevich
"The proper pronounciation of 'Cthulhu' is 'Bob.'"
— Meme
