Please, just go and ruin somebody else's home furnishings!
—Floyd to Trevor, Grand Theft Auto V
Shaun: [on Ed] I've known him since primary school, you know? I like having him around, he's a laugh.
Pete: What, because he can impersonate an orangutan? Fuck-a-doodle-doo.
Shaun: Oh, leave him alone.
Pete: All right, I admit, he can be pretty funny on occasion... like that time we stayed up all night drinking apple Schnapps and playing Tekken 2.
Shaun: Oh yeah! [laughs] When was that?
Pete: That was five years ago. When's he going home?
Pete: What, because he can impersonate an orangutan? Fuck-a-doodle-doo.
Shaun: Oh, leave him alone.
Pete: All right, I admit, he can be pretty funny on occasion... like that time we stayed up all night drinking apple Schnapps and playing Tekken 2.
Shaun: Oh yeah! [laughs] When was that?
Pete: That was five years ago. When's he going home?
And they stay there all day, eat everything you have, drink everything you have, and they never know when to go. You know, they're not sophisticated. They sit there, you're there at one o'clock in the morning with the grandfather clock between your pajama'd knees, staring at the motherfucker, saying "Please! Go home!" And you end up saying terrible things: "Look, we drank everything in the house. I don't think that minicab is coming. I know we had eight or nine bottles of wine and half a bottle of whiskey, but I think you should drive. I do! I will personally selotape your hands to the wheel! Get in the fuckin' car and go away from here, please!"
—Dylan Moran on countryside guests
Atreus: Why do you hate Thor so much?
Spirit: After my father passed, my mother built the statue to watch over his grave. Imagine our surprise when the God of Thunder himself came to offer condolences! At first we were thrilled, but he quickly took advantage of our hospitality. My mother begged him to leave, and Thor, in his drunken rage, killed her. I was left with nothing but grief. Eventually, I lost that as well... and found only rage in its place.
Spirit: After my father passed, my mother built the statue to watch over his grave. Imagine our surprise when the God of Thunder himself came to offer condolences! At first we were thrilled, but he quickly took advantage of our hospitality. My mother begged him to leave, and Thor, in his drunken rage, killed her. I was left with nothing but grief. Eventually, I lost that as well... and found only rage in its place.
"I stayed out late one night and you moved in
I didn't mind 'cause of the state you were in
May I remind you that it's been a year since then"
I didn't mind 'cause of the state you were in
May I remind you that it's been a year since then"
—Carole Bayer Sager, "You're Moving Out Today"
Leftover holiday guests make perfect sources of inconvenience and unpleasantness.
—The Old Codger's 1985 Almanac
"Fish and visitors stink in three days."
Ted: When I come back, your mother, Jackie, and Ralph will have left too, right?
Sally: I've gone from dropping hints to leaving their suitcases open on their beds.
Sally: I've gone from dropping hints to leaving their suitcases open on their beds.
"Never hold a séance, boy-o… not without me permission, because ghosts are like relatives. Once you let them in, they never leave!"
—Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob SquarePants, "Séance Schméance"
What got into this man, to step in here, sleep in my chair and stick all my stuff together? I don't have to take this! I'll... I'll grab him! And then shake him! Verbally, that is... I'll tell him a thing or two... And ask him when he's going to leave.
As soon as he wakes up...
As soon as he wakes up...
—"Tidy
" from Nobody Here
" from Nobody Here