Quotes / The "Fun" in "Funeral"

"Oh the night Pat Murphy died
Is a night I'll never forget
Some of the girls got loaded drunk
And they ain't gone sober yet
As long as the bottle was passed around
Every man was feeling gay
O'Leary came with the bagpipes
Some music for to play"

— "The Night Pat Murphy Died", Newfoundland Folk-song

Ted: Dougal's doing A FUNERAL!? You let DOUGAL do a FUNERAL?!

— Father Ted

Cause we all wanna party when the funeral ends. / And we all get together when we bury our friends.

— Kill All Your Friends, My Chemical Romance

"It's the best kind of party! It's a funeral! WOO HOO!"

— Tagon, Schlock Mercenary

"If you mix up the letters in "funeral" you get "real fun"..."

— Billy, Six Feet Under

Jadzia: It's called an Irish wake. It's a way to memorialize death, but celebrate life at the same time.
Worf: What are we supposed to do?
Jadzia: Well, drink, sing songs. Laugh, cry, talk about the deceased.
Worf: It sounds... almost Klingon.

— Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, "The Sound of Her Voice"

Faye: Ah, yes, that would be Fred's grandfather's obituary. He was a shockingly hard man to get along with. Racist, insulting and hateful to his wife and kids. But, in the end, I learned something very important from his death.

Monette: And that would be what?

Faye: There are definitely times when party hats and noisemakers are acceptable at a funeral.

— Something*Positive

"And I guess that we're all thinking how sad it is that a man of such talent, of such capability for kindness, of such unusual intelligence, should now so suddenly be spirited away at the age of only forty-eight, before he'd achieved many of the things of which he was capable, and before he'd had enough fun. Well, I feel that I should say: nonsense. Good riddance to him, the freeloading bastard, I hope he fries. And the reason I feel I should say this is he would never forgive me if I didn't, if I threw away this glorious opportunity to shock you all on his behalf. Anything for him but mindless good taste."

— John Cleese's eulogy for Graham Chapman

Nixon began. The voice is deep and slightly toneless, without regional accent, like a radio announcer's. We have been told that he wrote his own script. It is possible. Certainly every line was redolent of the man's strange uncharm. He spoke of Eisenhower, who was watching them from his hospital bed. "His heart is with us!" the candidate exclaimed, reminding us inadvertently that that poor organ was hardly the General's strongest contribution to the moral crusade that the times require.

— Gore Vidal, "The Twenty-Ninth Republican National Convention"

"I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral."

— Texts from Last Night

"[A]t my funeral, you'll leave with a smile on your face and a few bucks in your pocket. Now that's a funeral worth having!"

— Lawrence "Larry the Liquidator" Garfield, Other People's Money.

Steve Dallas had passed on without a will. A member of his wake was thus dispatched to fetch his earthly booty. It included: law books, a frat pin, loose change, and a bottle of "Old Spice", which Portnoy accidentally drank, causing him to think he was "Aunt Bea".

Portnoy: ANDY? OPIE?

A box of Trojans was also found and, after much debate, finally identified as possibly being microwave Jell-O molds.

Portnoy: Hmm.

Opus: But he hated cooking!

The latter were filled with water and delivered airborne unto Mrs. Paula Pegwhistle's passing Pontiac...which pretty well wrapped things the heck up for the night.

— Bloom County

at my funeral there is going to be a closed casket and then it will be opened to reveal that i am not inside. instead, they will turn on the ceiling fan and my lifeless body will swing around the room while the space jam theme song is playing in the background.

— unclefather on Tumblr

"Well, yes, I believe after all there’s humor in a graveyard. Why not? Which reminds me of a story I think it was a famous comedian, Harry Tate, English comedian died, and was being buried. At the graveside were all his fellow comedians including one very old man named Charles Coburn. A rather brash young comedian, just as the coffin was being lowered into the grave, leaned over to him and said, how old are you Charlie? And this old, old comedian said, oh, he said, 'I’m 89'. The young one said, 'Hardly seems worthwhile going home, does it?'"

— Alfred Hitchcock

"If you've ever worn a tube top to a funeral home...you might be a redneck."

— Jeff Foxworthy

"If you've ever opened a beer during a eulogy..."

— Bill Engvall, one-upping Jeff Foxworthy (see above)

What Kyle wants at his funeral

A cake all the way to the ceiling
Ice cream stand
Free kittens
Imagine Dragons performance
Chocolate fountain to the sky
Chocolate swimming pool
A guy wearing a black cloak and holding a scythe
Guacamole sombreros
Ball pit
Heated recliners

—This post

"Cheer up, Keeley, it's a funeral."

— Roy, Ted Lasso, "No Weddings and a Funeral"

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