"Magic. Giant humans are always magic. You supersize a human with science, bones and tissue can't hold at that scale. They collapse into ten tons of screams, broken bones, and leakin' fluids."
— Peacemaker, Blue Beetle
"Grasshoppotamus: A creature that can leap to tremendous heights... once."
— From a fortune cookie
"Why do we even HAVE the square-cube law? [...] I wish giant monsters were as impossible as they're SUPPOSED to be!"
"The biggest Primid of all. Its attacks are the same in form and function, but considerably more powerful than a normal Primid's. Watch out for its smash attack—it will launch you far. It also has jump and roll attacks. The bigger size means an increase in Shadow Bugs—does that mean it takes more Shadow Bugs to move bigger Primids?"
— Super Smash Bros. Brawl, "Big Primid" trophy description
"ATTENTION FIFTY-FOOT FEMINIST METAPHOR!" blared a loudspeaker. "YOU ARE IN VIOLATION OF THE SQUARE-CUBE LAW! RETURN TO A SCIENTIFICALLY PLAUSIBLE HEIGHT/WEIGHT RATIO IMMEDIATELY!"
— Attack of the 50-Ft Half-Klingon
"Think of a piece of candy wrapped in plastic. You can easily pick the candy up by the wrapper because it's so small.
If the piece of candy were the size of a large dog, however, its weight would tear through the wrapper even if the plastic were the same relative thickness. If we were simply larger insects scaled up, our insides would suffer the same fate as that piece of candy.
Fortunately, there are a few factors keeping our insides inside us (and defying other limits physics would impose), and rest assured that I will be addressing all of them."
If the piece of candy were the size of a large dog, however, its weight would tear through the wrapper even if the plastic were the same relative thickness. If we were simply larger insects scaled up, our insides would suffer the same fate as that piece of candy.
Fortunately, there are a few factors keeping our insides inside us (and defying other limits physics would impose), and rest assured that I will be addressing all of them."
— Professor Gregorsa, Humans-B-Gone!
"I shall crush you like giant mutant insects are crushed under their own weight!"
"Square Cube Law: As things get bigger, their surface area is a square of their growth factor, but their volume is cubed. Galileo discovered it. I drew him for you because I'm a good professor.
Put it another way: make yourself 10 times larger, your muscles get 100 times as big, but you have to carry 1000 times more weight. That's why elephants look like elephants and not giant mice: you can't just scale up animals and expect them to work.
I drew them for you too, because I'm a good professor.
And yes, you can get around this restriction with certain cosmic rays or exotic particles. I am aware of Pym's work, thank you.
It's hard not to be when he published journal articles like "Ha Ha, I'm Giant-Man Now: Screw You, All Other Physicists."
But without cosmic rays or Pym Particles, any animal made giant will absolutely break its leg with the first step it takes! Remember that well, my students!
For the physics I have just shared with you may one day save your life, if not the lives of everyone on the planet!!"
Put it another way: make yourself 10 times larger, your muscles get 100 times as big, but you have to carry 1000 times more weight. That's why elephants look like elephants and not giant mice: you can't just scale up animals and expect them to work.
I drew them for you too, because I'm a good professor.
And yes, you can get around this restriction with certain cosmic rays or exotic particles. I am aware of Pym's work, thank you.
It's hard not to be when he published journal articles like "Ha Ha, I'm Giant-Man Now: Screw You, All Other Physicists."
But without cosmic rays or Pym Particles, any animal made giant will absolutely break its leg with the first step it takes! Remember that well, my students!
For the physics I have just shared with you may one day save your life, if not the lives of everyone on the planet!!"
— Squirrel Girl's Physics Professor (he ends all his lectures like that), The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl
Molly: So how's it feel, pushin' the envelope of the ol' square cube law?
Jolly the Giantess: Well, I hath ne'er studied law...
Jolly the Giantess: Well, I hath ne'er studied law...
"Let me tell you something about the whole 'an ant can lift 100 times its own weight' business. It's a myth, okay? How much do you think an ant actually weighs? Like nothing. What's nothing times a hundred? Noth- It's nothing!"
"According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyways. Because bees don't care what humans think is impossible."
"In today's news, a 1,000 meter tall lizard creature attacked New York City. Given the enormous weight of the creature, and the fact that weight and cross-sectional area don't scale linearly, the creature was almost entirely legs, which were almost entirely made of bones. Additionally, since nerve impulses travel at about 100 meters per second, the creature was not able to rapidly respond to dangerous stimuli. The creature was thus easily dispatched, then used to make a tasty bone broth. Sources say local people reluctantly thanked science for never letting anything interesting happen."
"You can drop a mouse down a thousand-yard mine shaft; and on arriving at the bottom, it gets a slight shock and walks away. A rat is killed, a man is broken, a horse splashes."
— J.B.S. Haldane, "On Being the Right Size"
