Staz: You mean there's sequels to it!?
Fuyumi: Yeah, there's a lot of them.
Staz: THEN WHY DO THEY CALL IT FINAL!?
Fuyumi: Yeah, there's a lot of them.
Staz: THEN WHY DO THEY CALL IT FINAL!?
What the fuck? You can't even trust the damn title!
— The Angry Video Game Nerd on Plumbers Don't Wear Ties upon seeing a plumber, in fact, wearing a tie.
First of all: I don't get the title. "Flight to Egypt"? You're not flying, you're riding on a donkey—or an ass, if you'd prefer. What airline is this? Ass Express? And yes, I know the word "flight" doesn't necessarily mean aviation. But hey, it's a fuckin' joke.
— The Angry Video Game Nerd again, on one of the games on The King of Kings
"Super" Pitfall...one of the most deceptive uses of the word "super" in video game history.
— The Angry Video Game Nerd yet again, on Super Pitfall!
This song has nothing to do with fucking kids, by the way.
— Intestinal Disgorge, "I'm Going to Fuck Your Kid"
Greg Wyshynski: Some one said this on Twitter before and I didn't realize it...the show's not actually about a hobo?
Jeff Marek: No, it's about a dog! It's a hybrid of a German shepherd and a husky.
Wyshynski: Wait, the dog's a... it's about a dog?
Marek: Yeah, dude. You never watched The Littlest Hobo?
Wyshynski: NO! Where the fuck am I gonna see Littlest Hobo?! We don't put this shit on the air over here!
Jeff Marek: No, it's about a dog! It's a hybrid of a German shepherd and a husky.
Wyshynski: Wait, the dog's a... it's about a dog?
Marek: Yeah, dude. You never watched The Littlest Hobo?
Wyshynski: NO! Where the fuck am I gonna see Littlest Hobo?! We don't put this shit on the air over here!
— The hosts of Marek vs. Wyshynski discussing The Littlest Hobo
Gadget's not really doing a lot of saving Christmas is he? He's more like... Guantanamo-ing Christmas.
— Nostalgia Critic on Inspector Gadget Saves Christmas
"There's these guys, called the Watchmen, except they're not called the Watchmen! In fact, the word 'Watchmen' is always covered up! How can you call it Watchmen if there are no Watchmen?"
— Lester B. Bum, Atop the Fourth Wall, on Watchmen
"This episode is called World War III. Why? I'm not sure, because there's no World War III in it. Yeah, the bad guys are trying to start World War III, but... they fail. You might as well call 'The Next Doctor' 'Everyone in Victorian England Gets Turned into a Cyborg and Conquers the Fucking World', but maybe that was too long."
"Alone in the Dark: Illumination is a co-operative shooter in which you use light to fight monsters. Meaning it's a game in which you're neither alone, nor in the dark. At its most basic foundation, the latest Alone in the Dark manages to completely balls up the series' premise."
"OK, so he called it "Let's Play" but he's not really talking; he called it Worms but it's not Worms; so "Part 1" is maybe the only truthful part of this except there's no "Part 2" yet and I guess judging by that there never will be!"
"It's like a movie called Horses! Horses! Horses!, and there's not a single fucking horse in the whole movie!"
— Kung-Fu Jesus, Let's Play Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)
"THAT WAS ONLY ONE SECRET AND IT WAS NOT JOLLY AT ALL"
"And there's the cane from Citizen Kane. Wait a minute, there was no cane in Citizen Kane." note
— Lisa, The Simpsons, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?"
First of all, they're not teens. Secondly, there's no water involved. The whole Hunger Force thing? That's probably misleading too.
— [adult swim]'s official description of Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Most comedians store their jokes in folders. I only have two folders. One is labelled "Plots to destroy the world". The other is labelled "Teen Angst Poetry". Except it doesn't contain teen angst poetry. It actually contains plots to destroy the world. The folder labelled "Plots to destroy the world" actually contains plots to take over the world. It's misdirection.
— Erik Charles Nielsen, stand-up routine.
And also, I'm not skiing, I'm snowboarding. I guess that's kind of like the cool kid version of skiing. Skiing is just like snowboarding on two feet.
—Lonniedos
on Skiing Fred
on Skiing FredJamie: I went to see that film There Will Be Blood, right? I mean, it's a fucking great title. If somebody says to you, 'Do you fancy going to see a film?' 'Well, I don't know, will there be blood?' There Will Be Blood, right? 'I'm in, I'm in!' I mean, that is a fucking great title for a film. I mean you couldn't have a better title for a film. Apart from, maybe, There Will Be Tits. You could have a cinema that just shows There Will Be Blood and There Will Be Tits, you don't need any other films! That's the end of cinema right there!
Malcolm: Is this fucking going anywhere?
Jamie: Yeah, yeah, I went see There Will Be Blood, and there wasn't any fucking blood!
Malcolm: There was some blood.
Jamie: Och, there was hardly any fucking blood.
Malcolm: Is this fucking going anywhere?
Jamie: Yeah, yeah, I went see There Will Be Blood, and there wasn't any fucking blood!
Malcolm: There was some blood.
Jamie: Och, there was hardly any fucking blood.
There is a chapter in the first Winnie the Pooh book, called 'In Which Piglet Meets a Heffalump'. The title of this story might lead you to believe that involves an actual Heffalump. However, the Heffalump in this case is in fact Pooh with a honey jar stuck on his head.
— article on Winnie the Pooh
on Winnie the Pooh"In fact, we ducks do anything but sit. Who named this show, anyway?"
— Bill in a Cartoon Network promo for Sitting Ducks
for Sitting Ducks"Consumer note: Nobody walks on fire in this movie."
— Roger Ebert reviews Fire Walker (1986)
