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Quotes / Insufferable Genius

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    Comic Books 
"I'm a friggin' genius and none of you ever listen to me!"
Tony Stark, Iron Man

    Film — Animation 
"Ladies and gentlemen. I think the confusion here is that you are all very ignorant. Is that right word, ignorant? I mean stupid, primitive, unenlightened. You do not understand science, so you are afraid of it. Like a dog is afraid of thunder or balloons. To you, science is magic and witchcraft because you have such small minds. I cannot make your heads bigger, but your children's heads, I can take them and crack them open. This is what I try to do, to get at their brains!"
Mr. Rzykruski, Frankenweenie

    Film — Live-Action 
Cramden: Flint, I owe you my life. The medics said four more seconds and I—
Flint: Three more seconds, sir.
Cramden: Dammit man, is there anything you don't know?!

Mr. Gage: Do you think I deserve your full attention?
Zuckerberg: [staring out window] I had to swear an oath before we began this deposition, and I don't want to perjure myself, so I have a legal obligation to say no.
Gage: Okay. "No." You don't think I deserve your attention.
Zuckerberg: I think if your clients want to sit on my shoulders and call themselves tall, they have the right to give it a try. But there's no requirement that I enjoy sitting here listening to people lie. You have part of my attention; you have the minimum amount. The rest of my attention is back at the offices of Facebook where my colleagues and I are doing things that no one in this room — including and especially your clients — are intellectually or creatively capable of doing. Did I adequately answer your condescending question?

"You are probably going to be a very successful computer person. But you're going to go through life thinking girls don't like you because you're a nerd. And I want you to know from the bottom of my heart that that won't be true. It'll be because you're an asshole."

"You're not 'wrong,' Walter, you're just an asshole."
The Dude, The Big Lebowski

Dr. Robotnik: Are you in charge here?
Major Bennington: Yes, I am—
Robotnik: NOPE!
Bennington: ...my—
Robotnik: WRONG!
Bennington: ...name's—
Robotnik: I'M IN CHARGE! Allow me to clarify: in a sequentially-based hierarchy based on level of critical importance, the disparity between us is too vast to quantify. Agent Stone?
Agent Stone: The Doctor thinks you're basic.
Bennington: Listen, pal, I don't know if you realize—
Robotnik: I'm sorry, Major, what was your name?
Bennington: Benning—
Robotnik: NOBODY CARES!

Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Would you read that back to me? I'm afraid that might make me sound pompous to your readers.
Reporter: "My brilliant research in brain transplantation is unsurpassed, and will probably make my name live beyond eternity."
Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Well, that's all right. Take out the "probably". It makes me sound wishy-washy.

Hugh Alexander: If you run the wires across the plugboard matrix diagonally, you'll eliminate rotor positions 500 times faster.
Alan Turing: This is actually not an entirely terrible idea.
Joan Clarke: That's Alan for "thank you."

"Are you paying attention? Good. If you're not listening carefully you will miss things. Important things. I will not pause, I will not repeat myself, and you will not interrupt me. If you think that because you're sitting where you are and I am sitting where I am that you are in control of what is about to happen, you're mistaken. I am in control, because I know things that you do not know."

    Literature 
Imagine the worst barroom know-it-all you've ever met, who really does, and is cursed with a tourettes-like compulsion to spill anything relevant on any topic that comes up, and you're about halfway there.
Ciaphas Cain: Hero of the Imperium, on Caractacus Mott

The education of John Quincy Adams was to be the most superb of any of the American presidents, and consequently absolutely crippling; he knew too many languages, books, nations, political and philosophical systems to be able to preside with any grace or tolerance over the dingy republic of his day.
— "The Four Generations of the Adams Family", by Gore Vidal

Letice Earwig: Then perhaps she should learn to be a bit more humble...
Nanny Ogg: What's she got to be humble about?
— "The Sea and Little Fishes" on Granny Weatherwax, Discworld

"This, Quentin. This is greatness. These are things you will never do. Never understand."
It was true. Even with the strength he'd gained after his father died, he would never be in Mayakovsky's league. It cost him nothing to admit it. He just wished that with all his genius Mayakovsky could help them.

Well, I came top of the class again. One hundred out of one hundred for Maths. And one hundred out of one hundred for English. I'm just a natural brain, the best there is. There isn't one kid in the class who can come near me. Next to me, they're all dumb.
Unnamed Boy, Smart Ice Cream by Paul Jennings

    Live-Action TV 
Dick: I made the front page of The Daily Badgerian again.
Tommy: What's it say?
Sally: [reading headline] "Physics professor calls Einstein idiot; proclaims self much smarter."
3rd Rock from the Sun, "Proud Dick"

Leonard: We think we can help you with your stage fright.
Sheldon: Oh, I doubt that. I haven't figured out a way, and I'm much smarter than all of you.
Penny: Yes, but you're not smarter than all of us put together.
Sheldon: Oh, I'm sorry, that is what I meant.

"Don't you think if I were wrong, I'd know it?"
Sheldon, The Big Bang Theory

Howard: You enjoy making fun of engineering so much. How do you quantify the strength of materials?
Sheldon: Young's modulus.
Raj: Is that right?
Howard: Yeah... Okay, how do you prevent eddy currents in a transformer?
Sheldon: Laminate the core material.
Leonard: C'mon, give him a hard one.
Howard: That was a hard one!

"Dear God. What is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so boring."

[after Sherlock has given Watson a Sherlock Scan]
Watson: That's amazing.
Sherlock: People who don't know me often say that.
Watson: What do the people who do know you say?
Sherlock: "Piss off."

"I'd say you're a genius, but I'm in the room."
The Doctor, Doctor Who

Rose: With you, did [the Doctor] do that thing where he'd explain something at like ninety miles an hour, and you'd go "what?", and he'd look at you like you just dribbled on your shirt?
Sarah Jane: [laughing] All the time!

Vash: It's over, Q. I want you out of my life. You are arrogant, you are overbearing and you think you know everything.
Q: But I do know everything.
Vash: That makes it even worse.

"It's a talent bringing dead worlds to life, but humility and common sense aren't part of the job description."
Jadzia Dax describing terraformers, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, "Second Sight"

Kasidy: You don't mean he was gloating? A Vulcan?
Sisko: That's exactly what I mean! Ohh, he may have hidden it beneath that "Vulcan calm"! But inside, he loved every minute of it.

"Have the Q always had an absence of manners, or is it the result of some natural evolutionary process that comes with omnipotence?"

"How can you speak six languages and sound like a dick in every one of them?"
Cisco Ramon, The Flash (2014)

""Narcissist", "sociopath", "evil genius"...there are a lot of ways to describe Lex Luthor. But I find "douchebag" to be the most descriptive."

Perkins: You know Doctor, I can't tell if you're a genius or just incredibly arrogant.
The Doctor: Well, on a good day I'm both.

[At a rehearsal for a live closed-circuit classroom on a Mars probe landing]
C.J: Mr. President, I strongly urge you to act as moderator and pass the questions off to one of the experts instead of answering them yourself. Would you like to see some of the questions?
[...]
President Bartlet: Katie, 6th Grader, Greenoaks Junior High, Austin, Texas asks: "How old is the planet Mars?" That's a great question, Katie: the planet Mars is 4.6 billion years old.
C.J: What did I just say?!
President Bartlet: I knew that one.
C.J: Sir, no one likes a know-it-all.
President Bartlet: Yes, God forbid that while talking to 60,000 public school students the President should appear smart.
C.J: That's fine, just don't show off.
President Bartlet: I don't show off. Stevie, 4th Grader, Ps41 Manhattan asks: "What is the temperature on Mars?" ... Well, Stevie, if one of our expert panellists were here, they'd tell you the average temperature ranges from 15 degrees to -140.
C.J: That happens to be wrong! [Consulting notes] It ranges from 60 to -225.
President Bartlet: I converted it to Celsius in my head.

"My friend is never wrong which is...as annoying...as that sounds."
Sameen Shaw, Person of Interest

"Ain't I great? Ain't I awesome? Ain't I a genius?"
Sento Kiryu, Kamen Rider Build

    Video Games 
"A shame. If you were anything akin to me, perhaps we could've become friends. Then again, you would need an IQ of more than 200 to meet the minimum criteria."
Bedman to... himself, Guilty Gear: Xrd

"Must I remind you of my superiority?"

"Sir, don't tell me how to do my job. I don't come over to your cave and tell you how to bang rocks together, do I?"
Terachnoid from Omnitech commercial, Ratchet & Clank Future: A Crack in Time

"I find myself in need of your unique skillsets, your "street smarts", as your intellectually challenged kind adorably calls them."

"It isn't hubris... when one is truly exceptional."
Gorilla Grodd, Injustice 2

"We're studying contrasts! I'm excellent and you're, well, not!"
"I look forward to analysing your mistakes."
"It's hard to be a genius when you're surrounded by lesser minds."
"I've prepared an entire treatise on your impending failure."

"You should be glad I'm with you to point out all your stupid mistakes."
Myron, Fallout 2

"Do you know what that condescending bitch said to me after our first game of chess?"
Cortana, referring to Doctor Halsey, Halo 4

"Prodigy" doesn't begin to cover it. "Insufferable" starts to.
Description of Nicolai Surev, System Crash

"I am asura. I personify genius."
Guild Wars 2, opening cutscene for every newly-created asura character.

Luna: Dril, you helped design the Yamato, right? I trust you.
Dril: Good! 'Cause I'm smarter than Mr. Last Place there. Right, Hamco?
Sho: Shut up, already!

    Webcomics 
Fryderyk Chopin: Unrelated, we are both on the cover of "Enormous Ego" this week.
Franz Liszt: Only this week?

Marten: Has anyone ever told you you're kind of a huge asshole?
Elizabeth: No. Everybody is intimidated by my intellect, so I can say whatever I want and they chalk it up to me being a "misunderstood genius."

    Web Original 
"I don't believe I'm smarter than anyone else... I KNOW I'm smarter than anyone else."
Logan, Sanders Sides

Life is rough for smart kids in school. There's nothing super-heroic about getting your underwear yanked up your ass by meatheads because you can read without moving your lips. Having said that, in any high school, there's always that one smug, self-satisfied smart kid who likes rubbing their big brain in the other kids' faces. Remember how much everyone hated that kid? Okay, now add 'super-intelligence' to your list of powers, where suddenly you can argue foreign policy with Nobel Laureates while doing long division in your head and scribbling a cure for leukemia on a notepad. You're gonna turn into an insufferable jerk faster than you can say, 'Well, I suppose that's a simplified way of looking at it.' Lex Luthor may be a genius, but nobody's inviting his smug ass to their house parties.

Despite his age he was a prodigy, but that level of skill at that level of immaturity was bound to cause some arrogance. Luckily he had teammates to rein him in.
Lightning Sentai Blitzenger, describing Kimura Sanjou

What a curiosity The Lone Gunmen have turned out to be. I find them a peculiar success despite the fact that I sometimes find them extremely annoying...The only one that I cannot get on with on a regular basis is Langly who strikes me as the worst excesses of geek hood in human form. Every time he opens his mouth I want to stuff something fist-sized inside, his mock anger is wearying and I hate the way he always thinks he is right in that pigeon-holed way that geeks do when their dander is up. He’s the sort of person that would hack into government files for something as facile as gaining access to disabled parking areas.
Joe Ford on The X-Files, "Unusual Suspects"

In any standard crime show, only one character can be a sci-fi geek, and it's usually the scientist or lab technician in the group. So what do you do when your entire cast is made up of lab technicians? How do you choose?!? Apparently, you make your geek the lab tech who's more pompous and annoying than all of the other lab techs put together. Sure, let's make the smug, superior guy the Star Trek—sorry, "Astro Quest" fan. Clearly, THIS is the guy who would go to conventions in costume, fantasize about his co-workers in Astro Quest-themed scenarios, refer to himself as a "padawan" and name his cat "Kobayashi Maru." Not the hunky lab tech with the smoldering eyes—the dillweed. Stop giving Astro Quest fans a bad name, Hodges!

You can't just keep using your intelligence as a way to escape your humanity. I didn't ask you to say salt because I thought a customer would seriously care or because I was insecure, I did it because it made you look weird and I was trying to get you to adopt behaviors and use language that makes you come across like a normal fucking person.
Everyone knows what sodium chloride is, but calling it that outside the context of a chemistry class makes you seem like someone who defines themselves solely by their intelligence, which is undeniably who you are.
I know you think there's nothing wrong with being that person, dude, but there is. Taking your IQ and deciding that it elevates you above the rest of the planet is an awful decision that will lead to a life of misery and alienation. It will color every interaction you ever have and make it impossible to have real friends or relationships.

    Western Animation 
"Try not to let the brilliance overwhelm you."
Kid Flash, Young Justice (2010)

"It's hard to not act like a know-it-all when you actually do know it all."

Gyro: Shut up everyone! I've done something brilliant!
Scrooge: Ah, Gyro. [to Louie] Gyro Gearloose, my head of research and development.
Board Member: I'm sorry, but we-
Gyro: Apology accepted. Now try to keep up with my mind-numbing genius.
Scrooge: Gyro, what did we say about interacting with other people?
Gyro: The cards. [sighs] Fine.

    Real Life 
"The reasoning man who scorns the prejudices of simpletons necessarily becomes the enemy of simpletons; he must expect as much, and laugh at the inevitable."

"All of your good qualities become obscured by your super-cleverness and are made useless to the world merely because of your rage at wanting to know everything better than others; of wanting to improve and master what you cannot command. With this you embitter the people around you, since no one wants to be improved in such a forceful way, least of all by such an insignificant individual as you still are. [...] If you were less like you, you would only be ridiculous, but thus as you are, you are highly annoying. Everything I wrote to you is not meant as a reproach, but as an attempt to show you how the world sees you, how even I have to see you, even though my love to you has been proven again and again. Now you have to see for yourself what you deduce of that."
Johanna Schopenhauer in a letter to her 19-year-old son Arthur

"The only thing that sustains one through life is the consciousness of the immense inferiority of everybody else, and this is a feeling that I have always cultivated."

"There are two motives for reading a book; one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it."

"A genius is a genius, regardless of the number of morons who belong to the same race—and a moron is a moron, regardless of the number of geniuses who share his racial origin."

""Well, all right, then it could be about whatever you want," they said. "It could be about magic." I am a bit of a sucker, I suppose, for the old magic. Also, I like showing off how brilliant and knowledgeable I am, so I could not resist saying, "Well, if you want to do an opera, and there's a bit of magic, then you should probably do it about Alchemy. Because, actually opera grew out of alchemy. Monteverdi was an alchemist." I know these things, and I really sort of enjoy rubbing people who don't know them's noses in it."
Alan Moore, on being asked to write an opera for the Manchester International Festival.

"In short, at least give the penguin a fair viewing. If you still don't like it, that's ok: that's why I'm boss. I simply know better than you do."
Linus Torvalds

"I'll try being nicer if you try being smarter."
Anonymous

"People who boast about their IQ are losers."
Stephen Hawking in a 2004 New York Times interview

With Derrida, you can hardly misread him, because he’s so obscure. Every time you say, "He says so and so," he always says, "You misunderstood me." But if you try to figure out the correct interpretation, then that’s not so easy. I once said this to Michel Foucault, who was more hostile to Derrida even than I am, and Foucault said that Derrida practiced the method of obscurantisme terroriste (terrorism of obscurantism). We were speaking French. And I said, "What the hell do you mean by that?" And he said, "He writes so obscurely you can’t tell what he’s saying, that’s the obscurantism part, and then when you criticize him, he can always say, 'You didn’t understand me; you’re an idiot.'"
John R. Searle on Jacques Derrida

"Intelligence is fine. But social skills, hard work, and perseverance carry you farther. Rather than being the smartest person in the room, be the person that others want in the room."
Ruben Navarrete Jr., The Daily Beast, "My Fatherly Advice to Kids Growing Up in a Divided Country"

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