"A human shield is just a hug facing out."
— Sabrina, Sabrina the Teenage Witch
I began to back away, keeping the wounded cadet between myself and any more incoming fire. After all, he'd already been shot twice, so another dent or two probably wouldn't make that much difference to him, whereas I was still up and running, and had every intention of keeping it that way.
— Commissar Ciaphas Cain
"You said 'take cover'."
— Chester McBadbat, The Fairly Oddparents
"Commence Operation Meatshield! Remember, just because your bones are broken doesn't mean they won't stop bullets from hitting me!"
— Sarge, Red vs. Blue
"Everybody panic! Oh my God, there's a bear loose in the coliseum! There will be no refunds! Your refund will be escaping this deathtrap with your life! If you have a small child, use it as a shield! They love the tender meat!"
— Jackie Moon, Semi-Pro
Dobson: (holding a gun to River's head) I'm not playing anymore. If anyone so much as moves-
Mal: (walks in and shoots Dobson in the eye)
Mal: (walks in and shoots Dobson in the eye)
— Firefly
"Activate hero shield!"
— Captain Hero, Drawn Together
"If she doesn't already know, I shall train my True Love in the art of unarmed combat, so that when the Evil Overlord uses her as a human shield she can slam her heel between his legs."
"Don't no man shoot, or I'll send her to unction. Any of you don't believe it are welcome to read my biography there."
MCPD Officer: This is the MCPD! Put down the princess or we'll open fire!
Crow: You do know she's not bulletproof, right?
Crow: You do know she's not bulletproof, right?
The Doctor: Now drop your weapons, or I'll kill him with this deadly jelly baby.
Sevateem Warrior: Kill him, then.
The Doctor: What?
Sevateem Warrior: Kill him, then.
[Pause]
The Doctor: I don't take orders from anyone. [Eats the jelly baby.] Take Me to Your Leader.
Sevateem Warrior: Kill him, then.
The Doctor: What?
Sevateem Warrior: Kill him, then.
[Pause]
The Doctor: I don't take orders from anyone. [Eats the jelly baby.] Take Me to Your Leader.
— Doctor Who, "The Face of Evil"
"Stupid shield! (drops his wrecked shield and grabs one of his opponents) Meat's the best shield, anyways."
— Valeros, Pathfinder
Professor Pau: You obviously know where you're going now. Why do you need me?
Ennesby: I thought maybe a human shield would be handy, but you don't screen very much.
Schlock: I might as well just eat him.
Professor Pau: I'll spread my arms out to look bigger. I will stop all the bullets!
Ennesby: That's the spirit.
Ennesby: I thought maybe a human shield would be handy, but you don't screen very much.
Schlock: I might as well just eat him.
Professor Pau: I'll spread my arms out to look bigger. I will stop all the bullets!
Ennesby: That's the spirit.
