open/close all folders
Anime and Manga
"What are you so afraid of, Cell? Isn't this what you wanted? I warned you! I told you what would happen if you pushed me too far! But you didn't listen. You forced me to awaken my hidden power, and now that you've seen it, you're afraid, because you know that I'm going to destroy you."
—Gohan, Dragon Ball Z
"We dreamed of creating the world’s strongest Pokémon... and we succeeded."
Comic Strips
Hobbes: Your duplicator is a big success.
Calvin: Oh no!
Calvin Clone: Are you kidding? It burned out after the fifth one of us!
Calvin: Oh no!
Calvin Clone: Are you kidding? It burned out after the fifth one of us!
Fan Works
"A lesson for all you budding mad scientists out there. It's an old lesson, but one that bears repeating. When you set out to build an unstoppable killing machine, please, ladies and gentlemen, make certain you really really want an unstoppable killing machine first."
—Artie, A Brief Moment of Culture: Jeffrey Wells's Very Long Narbonic Fanfic
"When other unicorns' spells go wrong they fail horribly. But noooo, for me they go wrong by working even better than I ever needed... or wanted."
—Twilight Sparkle, Composure
Yami: Ugh! The Seal of Orichalcos?! Why would you give this to me?!
Raphael: The only way to prove how evil you are, is to force you to play a card that makes you be evil.
[after the Pharoah uses the Seal]
Raphael: Now do you see how right I was about being evil?
Yami: Yes, Raphael. I see exactly what you mean. And now that I know how evil I can be, I am going to destroy you and everything you hold dear, and bathe in the afterglow of your demise. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Raphael: Well, well... good. I'm glad this worked out. Yay.
Raphael: The only way to prove how evil you are, is to force you to play a card that makes you be evil.
[after the Pharoah uses the Seal]
Raphael: Now do you see how right I was about being evil?
Yami: Yes, Raphael. I see exactly what you mean. And now that I know how evil I can be, I am going to destroy you and everything you hold dear, and bathe in the afterglow of your demise. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Raphael: Well, well... good. I'm glad this worked out. Yay.
"ReGenesis was an effort by certain individuals to create a super-soldier," he explained, "It was made with a combination of Reaper technology and magic. The project was headed by Professor Membrane and funded by the Globex Corporation, who expected a being that could tear dimensions asunder, destroy continents in the blink of an eye, and essentially achieved[sic] godlike power."
His look darkened.
"They succeeded," he snarled, "And now they're all dead."
His look darkened.
"They succeeded," he snarled, "And now they're all dead."
—Halloween Unspectacular 1, "Conclusion"
"It worked!... Too well."
—Makoto Fujiwara after his new “Armor Break” technique destroys his opponent’s clothes along with her armor, Marriage of Heaven and Hell
Sophia: "Emma, it worked!"
Emma: "...what worked?"
Sophia: "You know! It must have been, uh, that locker thing I guess, the timing's about right, it could have been something after that, but it worked! She is a fighter, and it's absolutely kick ass!"
Emma stared.
Sophia: "Look, uh, it was late last night. Armsmaster brought in a new cape who'd just joined after one hell of a debut, said she'd agreed to join the Wards and they were going through the paperwork. She fucked up Lung!"
Emma was getting a sinking feeling.
Sophia: "And she said she was going to unmask to us straight off, because her powers were terrifying so she wanted to make sure they didn't think she was a psychopath or something, I guess if they don't like my powers and theme and they keep getting on my case, it might be a problem for some people or something, but – fuck me if it isn't Taylor! And her power is so badass! She can control insects, and spiders, and stuff like that. All of them inside this, uh, huge range, it's at least a few blocks, and there's way more of those than I'd ever thought so it's even better than it sounds. She could fucking swarm the school in bugs – wasps, spiders, whatever – they might call her something like Weaver because of PR bullshit but she could be a goddamn apocalypse for the gangs – she fucked up Lung solo on her first night out. So it worked! It's brilliant!"
Emma was mostly screaming internally.
Emma: "...what worked?"
Sophia: "You know! It must have been, uh, that locker thing I guess, the timing's about right, it could have been something after that, but it worked! She is a fighter, and it's absolutely kick ass!"
Emma stared.
Sophia: "Look, uh, it was late last night. Armsmaster brought in a new cape who'd just joined after one hell of a debut, said she'd agreed to join the Wards and they were going through the paperwork. She fucked up Lung!"
Emma was getting a sinking feeling.
Sophia: "And she said she was going to unmask to us straight off, because her powers were terrifying so she wanted to make sure they didn't think she was a psychopath or something, I guess if they don't like my powers and theme and they keep getting on my case, it might be a problem for some people or something, but – fuck me if it isn't Taylor! And her power is so badass! She can control insects, and spiders, and stuff like that. All of them inside this, uh, huge range, it's at least a few blocks, and there's way more of those than I'd ever thought so it's even better than it sounds. She could fucking swarm the school in bugs – wasps, spiders, whatever – they might call her something like Weaver because of PR bullshit but she could be a goddamn apocalypse for the gangs – she fucked up Lung solo on her first night out. So it worked! It's brilliant!"
Emma was mostly screaming internally.
Film — Animated
Monty Uno: Come on, Ben, five kids with that kind of tactical genius and strategy? Had to be ex-Kids Next Door that you delightfulized until something went terribly wrong.
Benedict Uno: You mean something went terribly RIGHT! My first Delightfulization Chamber blew a fuse, increasing its power eleventy-billionfold! I lost the machine, but gained five perfect delightful children!
Benedict Uno: You mean something went terribly RIGHT! My first Delightfulization Chamber blew a fuse, increasing its power eleventy-billionfold! I lost the machine, but gained five perfect delightful children!
Film — Live-Action
"We increased the sharks' brain mass, and as a side effect, the sharks got smarter."
"Everyone forgot [about me]! That's why they weren't afraid anymore! That's why I needed Jason to kill for me, to get them to remember! But now he just won't stop!"
—Freddy Krueger, Freddy vs. Jason
Thunderbolt Ross: You must realize that what I'm about to tell you is very sensitive, both to me and to the Army. You know that we have a Bio-Force Department, and that we had a bio-force enhancement research project developed during World War II...
Emil Blonsky: A Super-Soldier.
Ross: A simplification, but yes. We decided to dust it off, and give it another go, aiming to create the better soldier. Banner's work was very early-phase. It wasn't even weapons application, he thought he was working on radiation resistance. I would never have told him what it was really for, but he was so sure about what he was doing he tested it on himself. And something went very wrong... or it went very right.
Emil Blonsky: A Super-Soldier.
Ross: A simplification, but yes. We decided to dust it off, and give it another go, aiming to create the better soldier. Banner's work was very early-phase. It wasn't even weapons application, he thought he was working on radiation resistance. I would never have told him what it was really for, but he was so sure about what he was doing he tested it on himself. And something went very wrong... or it went very right.
"At least you know it works. It's just a shame that your guinea pig had to be a homicidal maniac like Jack Frost, who I now have to put back... in a test tube."
—Agent Manners, Jack Frost (1997)
"Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."
—Dr. Ian Malcolm, Jurassic Park
"I was so careful... I picked the wrong play. The wrong director. The wrong cast... where did I go right?"
—Max Bialystock, The Producers
"The G-23 Paxilon Hydrochlorate that we added to the air processors. It was supposed to calm the population, weed out aggression. Well, it works. The people here stopped fighting. And then they stopped everything else. They stopped going to work, they stopped breeding, talking, eating. There's 30 million people here, and they all just let themselves die."
—Dr. Caron, Serenity
Literature
"i do not think the prudent one hastes to initiate
a sequence of events which he lacks power to terminate"
a sequence of events which he lacks power to terminate"
—archy, "prudence"
Cain: The goal of a Chaos Cult is to try and attract the attention of their patron deity. If they're lucky, they'll muck about, enacting rituals they don't understand, and maybe manage to wiggle themselves into some position of power where they can disrupt the day-to-day goings of the Imperium.
Cadet: What if they are not lucky?
Cain: They succeed in attracting said attention.
Cadet: What if they are not lucky?
Cain: They succeed in attracting said attention.
— Ciaphas Cainnote , "Cain's Last Stand"
Rune Haako: Stop! Enough! We surrender, do you understand? You can't just kill us-
Darth Vader: Can't I?
Rune Haako: We're unarmed! We surrender! Please - please, you're a Jedi!
Darth Vader: You fought a war to destroy the Jedi. Congratulations on your success.
Darth Vader: Can't I?
Rune Haako: We're unarmed! We surrender! Please - please, you're a Jedi!
Darth Vader: You fought a war to destroy the Jedi. Congratulations on your success.
"We should point out that mechanically, these massive haulers performed flawlessly. Unfortunately, a simple and understandable error was made in the search programming. It is rather amusing in a way.
"We have determined that due to the random vagaries of their search patterns, the two ore processors detected each other. Apparently each Automated Mineral Exploiter identified a large target of fabulously pure metal. The titanic ships came together and began dismantling each other for the ore. From our distant vantage point on one of the former pirate bases, we could only watch as the ore processors became the biggest scrap heap in this sector.
"We should emphasize that other than this minor error, the Automated Mineral Exploiter worked perfectly. The proof-of-concept has been completed, and all blueprints remain in the databanks of Orko SkyMine Corp. Given the potential wealth of the Hoth asteroid belt, it only makes sense to begin a second attempt.
"In the meantime we apologize for our error and throw ourselves at the mercy of the chairman, Durga the Hutt."
"We have determined that due to the random vagaries of their search patterns, the two ore processors detected each other. Apparently each Automated Mineral Exploiter identified a large target of fabulously pure metal. The titanic ships came together and began dismantling each other for the ore. From our distant vantage point on one of the former pirate bases, we could only watch as the ore processors became the biggest scrap heap in this sector.
"We should emphasize that other than this minor error, the Automated Mineral Exploiter worked perfectly. The proof-of-concept has been completed, and all blueprints remain in the databanks of Orko SkyMine Corp. Given the potential wealth of the Hoth asteroid belt, it only makes sense to begin a second attempt.
"In the meantime we apologize for our error and throw ourselves at the mercy of the chairman, Durga the Hutt."
— Incident report, The Illustrated Star Wars Universe (referencing the mutual destruction of two "World Devastator" resource gatherers in Darksaber)
Live-Action TV
Blackadder: Deny everything, Baldrick.
[Baldrick takes the witness stand]
George: Are you Private Baldrick?
Baldrick: No!
George: Oh. Um... but you are Captain Blackadder's batman?
Baldrick: No!
Blackadder: [Head Desk]
[Baldrick takes the witness stand]
George: Are you Private Baldrick?
Baldrick: No!
George: Oh. Um... but you are Captain Blackadder's batman?
Baldrick: No!
Blackadder: [Head Desk]
"The stunt that went horribly right."
—Julian Morrow on their stunt at the 2007 APEC Summit in Sydney
, The Chaser's War On Everything
, The Chaser's War On Everything Tabletop Games
"If the Modulons were built to simplify human lives, perhaps they actually succeeded in that goal — beyond all expectations."
—The End of the World: Revolt Of The Machines, "The Modular Menace - Post-Apocalypse"
"His mind whirled with great plans, never thinking of what might happen if he were to succeed."
"Of course it will grow beyond control - it was designed to choose its own evolution."
—Momir Vig, Magic: The Gathering, "Experiment Kraj"
"You sought to anger me, Nahiri. Soon you will see how well you have succeeded."
—Sorin Markov, Magic: The Gathering, "Merciless Resolve"
Video Games
Gunvolt: Why are you the only one in here? Where did the personnel go?
Elise: Oh, you didn't see them on the way down? You know, the living corpses?
Gunvolt: (Zombies? Even in a world full of Adepts, it sounded crazy.)
Elise: Sumeragi wanted our power. The power of Resurrection... So we gave it to them... all of them. I guess they should have been more specific.
Elise: Oh, you didn't see them on the way down? You know, the living corpses?
Gunvolt: (Zombies? Even in a world full of Adepts, it sounded crazy.)
Elise: Sumeragi wanted our power. The power of Resurrection... So we gave it to them... all of them. I guess they should have been more specific.
"In the city, science was unstoppable, until one day, science couldn't be stopped."
—BioShock 2 trailer
We constructed the Peacekeeper, the pinnacle of engineering and technology. This mighty war machine was designed to rid us of the Freedom Fighters, as well as any other potential threats to the peace we have so long pined for.
Its artificial intelligence ensures that this singular function is carried out with cold and calculating precision. Indeed, the 10,000 Peacekeeper units we created have now routed every threat to peace...including us.
Its artificial intelligence ensures that this singular function is carried out with cold and calculating precision. Indeed, the 10,000 Peacekeeper units we created have now routed every threat to peace...including us.
—Long-forgotten Correspondence, Final Fantasy XIV: Endwalker, "The Dead Ends"
"This was supposed to be for use in Nebulas and other, more creepy areas, but listen to the thing! FTL is not a psychological horror game, and this track was way too freaky and claustrophobic. Still pretty cool, though."
—Ben Prunty, FTL: Faster Than Light soundtrack liner notes on the Cut Song "Horror"
"I'm sorry to say I was ever proud of [the Faro Swarm]. But Ted could really sell a concept, and in the labs, in the light of creation... That first test run, when you saw they understood their own structures, could rebuild themselves from memory and light... there were no limits. Oh God... there were no limits!"
—Brad Andac, Horizon Zero Dawn
"[Cerberus] thought they were so clever. Turns out, mess with someone's head enough and you can turn a scared kid into an all-powerful bitch. Fuckin' idiots."
Shepard: I met your creators. They told me what you did to them.
Catalyst: We did as we were expected.
Shepard: They said you betrayed them. That you turned them into Harbinger.
Catalyst: When they asked that I solve the problem of conflict, they failed to understand they were part of the problem themselves. The flaws of their organic reasoning could not perceive this. They lacked the foresight to understand their destruction was part of the very solution they required.
Catalyst: We did as we were expected.
Shepard: They said you betrayed them. That you turned them into Harbinger.
Catalyst: When they asked that I solve the problem of conflict, they failed to understand they were part of the problem themselves. The flaws of their organic reasoning could not perceive this. They lacked the foresight to understand their destruction was part of the very solution they required.
"Alright, just to clarify, these rounds aren’t faulty. Heck, I’d say they’re better than the standard, but... that’s kind of the problem. I don’t know if it was a new shipment of materials, or a problem with the assembly line, but these rounds are supposed to pierce armor. Not pierce through the armor, five feet of reinforced concrete, a few warehouses, and an armored truck. Could you guys look into this so we don’t like, violate any Geneva Conventions or anything?"
—Armor-Piercing Rounds shipping log, Risk of Rain 2
"They placed their hopes and dreams on our shoulders and bid us fight for all that was good and right. We fought, and we fought and we fought... until there was no one left to fight. We won... and now our world is being erased from existence. We did everything right, everything that was asked of us, and still - still it came to this!"
—Arbert, Final Fantasy XIV Heavensward
Web Animation
"Successful as Bertron's experiment was, it was anything but a good idea."
—Wiz on the creator of Doomsday, DEATH BATTLE!
Maria:They're not strong or ferocious. They drain your will to go on. Bartleby's estate was haemorrhaging money towards the end. He wanted to cut costs on Huntsman protection, but in order to do that, he needed everyone calm. Always.
Oscar: [Quoting] "Managed to get two away from their pack. Hike back was miserable, but got the bastards in the cellar. Wife thinks I was out sealing the waterway entrance. I'll do it tomorrow, and tell her the truth once these things take the edge off of everyone. I'm... tired."
Maria: The next page proves that he did, but not before the rest of the pack followed their missing pair all the way home. My guess is that they made their way beneath the estate through the water tunnels that Bartleby sealed up the next morning. Bartleby's plan worked. No-one was angry, or sad, or scared. No-one was anything. And then... no-one was left.
Oscar: [Quoting] "Managed to get two away from their pack. Hike back was miserable, but got the bastards in the cellar. Wife thinks I was out sealing the waterway entrance. I'll do it tomorrow, and tell her the truth once these things take the edge off of everyone. I'm... tired."
Maria: The next page proves that he did, but not before the rest of the pack followed their missing pair all the way home. My guess is that they made their way beneath the estate through the water tunnels that Bartleby sealed up the next morning. Bartleby's plan worked. No-one was angry, or sad, or scared. No-one was anything. And then... no-one was left.
— RWBY, "Alone in the Woods"
Webcomics
Bunnigus: UNS military scientists have been working on soldier boosts for centuries. Thirty-one years ago someone put all the different programs under the same roof. Summarizing: They found that the right combination of these technologies would make any human functionally immortal.
Breya: Okay, but what were the side effects?
Bunnigus: You mean besides turning the entire population into a standing army of Super Soldiers? No side effects. Clean as a razor sharp, double-edged sword-whistle.
Breya: Okay, but what were the side effects?
Bunnigus: You mean besides turning the entire population into a standing army of Super Soldiers? No side effects. Clean as a razor sharp, double-edged sword-whistle.
Web Original
"Africanized bees owe their existence to science. Warwick E. Kerr created them in Brazil during the 1950s by crossing a European bee with an African bee. He wanted a bee that could live in the jungle. He got a bee that swarms by the hundreds of millions, is insanely territorial, mindlessly aggressive, has killed anywhere from a few dozen to a few thousand people, and can live in the jungle.
"And after they escaped and swarmed northward, it turned out they were a-OK with deserts, too. They'll be in Montana by 2010."
"And after they escaped and swarmed northward, it turned out they were a-OK with deserts, too. They'll be in Montana by 2010."
"So the good news is, Godzilla's back. The bad news is, Godzilla's back."
—James Rolfe reviewing Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah
SCP-1440: Should you choose to challenge Death to a game of cards for your life, there is one thing you must never do.
Dr. ████: And what is that?
SCP-1440: Win.
: Should you choose to challenge Death to a game of cards for your life, there is one thing you must never do.Dr. ████: And what is that?
SCP-1440: Win.
Western Animation
"Avatar Aang! Can you hear me? Your friend is safe! It was just a trick to trigger the Avatar State...and it worked!"
—General Fong, Avatar: The Last Airbender, "The Avatar State", trying to calm Aang down after he enters The Avatar State and nearly destroys the entire fortress.
Calculon: The year was 2019, and I was just a lowly robot arm working on Project Satan, a savage, intelligent military car built from the most evil parts of the most evil cars in all the world: the steering wheel from Hitler's staff car, the left-turn signal from Charles Manson's VW, the windshield wipers from that car that played Knight Rider-
Fry: Knight Rider wasn't evil!
Calculon: His windshield wipers were. It didn't come up much in the show, though. Anyway, only after bringing Project Satan to life did they discover they had made a terrible mistake! For you see... it was pure evil!
Fry: Knight Rider wasn't evil!
Calculon: His windshield wipers were. It didn't come up much in the show, though. Anyway, only after bringing Project Satan to life did they discover they had made a terrible mistake! For you see... it was pure evil!
—Futurama, "The Honking"
Owen: You mean that creature is still out there; it has the money, it's as powerful as Goliath... and it's smarter than you?
Xanatos: Owen, I think I created a monster.
Xanatos: Owen, I think I created a monster.
"Oh, the humanity! So much air! So much air! ...Whoa, too much air! TOO MUCH AIIIR!"
—Maurice "Twister" Rodriguez, Rocket Power
"Oh, no! Everything's going according to plan!"
—Star Butterfly as her Blunt Metaphors Trauma-induced plot to destroy a rival football team goes off, Star vs. the Forces of Evil
Grandpa: Now, where have you two been? Can't you see that aliens are attacking and the city's in flames?!
Arnold: Slow down, Grandpa. It was us. We did it to scare you.
Gerald: We did a radio show on the roof. It was us!
Grandpa: This is no time for jokes, boys! Look! [points to the sky] There's their mothership!
Arnold: Grandpa, that's the water tower. Stinky's up there. He lit it with Christmas lights.
Grandpa: Hoo, what?! W-What about them silver, bulbous, ugly-looking creatures at my front door?
Arnold: That was Helga and Harold and all the other kids in my class.
Grandpa: Hold the phone! That was you on the radio.
Arnold: Yeah, we used your old transmitter from the attic and we set it up so you guys would pick up a broadcast at the Halloween party.
Gerald: Yeah, check this out. [holds up a megaphone and talks like an announcer] "We interrupt this program to bring to you a special bulletin. Aliens have landed."
Grandpa: Well, what do you know? That was you! Ooh, very impressive. Hey, what about Douglas Kane flappin' his gums about it on TV? How'd you convince him?
Arnold: Wait a minute. Douglas Kane was talking about it on TV?
Grandpa: Yeah, it was a special bulletin, just like your prank. Except he was showin' a video of the same aliens that came to our front door. The news is all over town, the city's in panic!
Gerald: Uh oh.
Arnold: The TV station must have picked up our radio show. Grandpa, what happened to Helga and the kids after you saw them?
[screaming is heard; they look around the corner and see them running for their lives from an angry mob]
Grandpa: Well, Shortman, looks like we better go save your friends.
Arnold: Slow down, Grandpa. It was us. We did it to scare you.
Gerald: We did a radio show on the roof. It was us!
Grandpa: This is no time for jokes, boys! Look! [points to the sky] There's their mothership!
Arnold: Grandpa, that's the water tower. Stinky's up there. He lit it with Christmas lights.
Grandpa: Hoo, what?! W-What about them silver, bulbous, ugly-looking creatures at my front door?
Arnold: That was Helga and Harold and all the other kids in my class.
Grandpa: Hold the phone! That was you on the radio.
Arnold: Yeah, we used your old transmitter from the attic and we set it up so you guys would pick up a broadcast at the Halloween party.
Gerald: Yeah, check this out. [holds up a megaphone and talks like an announcer] "We interrupt this program to bring to you a special bulletin. Aliens have landed."
Grandpa: Well, what do you know? That was you! Ooh, very impressive. Hey, what about Douglas Kane flappin' his gums about it on TV? How'd you convince him?
Arnold: Wait a minute. Douglas Kane was talking about it on TV?
Grandpa: Yeah, it was a special bulletin, just like your prank. Except he was showin' a video of the same aliens that came to our front door. The news is all over town, the city's in panic!
Gerald: Uh oh.
Arnold: The TV station must have picked up our radio show. Grandpa, what happened to Helga and the kids after you saw them?
[screaming is heard; they look around the corner and see them running for their lives from an angry mob]
Grandpa: Well, Shortman, looks like we better go save your friends.
—Hey Arnold!, "Arnold's Halloween"
"All right. Good luck being everything. Sorry I helped."
—Ensign D'Vana Tendi, after watching a friend Ascend to a Higher Plane of Existence in the slowest and most horrifying way possible, Star Trek: Lower Decks
"So, my plan worked too well. Surely I can't be faulted for such an extraordinary level of success. Surely not."
—Cleveland Brown, The Cleveland Show
Real Life
"Someone near him said: 'It worked.'
Someone else said: 'Now we are all sons of bitches.'"
Someone else said: 'Now we are all sons of bitches.'"
—Kenneth Bainbridge, on the Trinity atomic bomb
Suppose we have an AI whose only goal is to make as many paper clips as possible. The AI will realize quickly that it would be much better if there were no humans because humans might decide to switch it off. Because if humans do so, there would be fewer paper clips. Also, human bodies contain a lot of atoms that could be made into paper clips. The future that the AI would be trying to gear towards would be one in which there were a lot of paper clips but no humans.
— Nick Bostrom On the dangers of AI with the goal without human morality.
