Quotes / Damsel Scrappy

"You see this a lot in screenplays that, maybe they have too much studio stink on them, or maybe they just weren't all that well thought-out in the first place. It's called LINETS: Love Interest Non-Essential To Story."

—The Nostalgia Chick

(In a parody of "Temple of Doom") Lady here only because she humping director.

—Stewie, Family Guy

"Dawn's in trouble. Must be Tuesday."

— Buffy, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

"You almost got yourself and all of us killed because of your unbelievably irresponsible, deranged, and self-centered behavior, but that just makes me desire you more, you crazy, quirky, irresistible woman, you."

—"Fangs of Endearment: A Vampire Novel" by Dave Barry

"I've traveled with a lot of people, but you're setting new records for jeopardy friendly."

— The Doctor on Rose, Doctor Who

"Ladybug's real test of heroism is whether she can stand saving Chloé over and over again, instead of just letting her die for being the worst human on Earth."

— So This Is Basically... Miraculous Ladybug

"I have never seen anyone more prone to life-threatening idiocy."

— Alice Cullen on Bella Swan, The Twilight Saga

Eggman: *Chuckles* Back in my lair once more. How many times are you gonna run?! I've captured you seventeen different times!
Elise: I feel like... it's gonna be at least eighteen.

— Real-Time Fandub, Sonic the Hedgehog

Seiya: Oh yeah? And spending your whole life running after Princess Whatshername, who's so dumb, so DUMB that she gets kidnapped every five minutes, you think it's a soft job?
Hippolyte: Indeed... seen like this...
Seiya: Miss is supposed to be the incarnation of a warrior goddess, but as soon as she goes to the Wallmart to take advantage of discounts for the Pig Feast, slam! Two mooks drop on her, and she can't even send them flying. And of course, who has to climb 6000 steps and beats up 142 assholes to get her back? Muggins here! And in half a day, to boot, otherwise Miss could end up dead cold.

— Flander's Company

Ashley: [under attack by Ganados] LEON! HEEEEEEEEEELP! [Leon arrives and beats up the Ganados] Leon! You saved me-
Leon: [slaps Ashley into the third dimension] I thought I told you to STAY IN THE DUMPSTER!
Ashley: Hey! What's the big idea?!
Leon: The big d— Bitch, I had to fight through, like, six dudes with a chainsaw, a big-ass troll thing, some BDSM-type shit, and a hot-ass Chinese woman just to get here!
Ashley: Y'know, technically she's Asian-American, so it's a little bit on the nose where she-
Leon: [slaps Ashley into the third dimension, again] WHY DIDN'T YOU STAY IN THE DUMPSTER?!
Ashley: Well, if you must know, I saw a butterfly. [a moment of dead, uncomprehending silence] And it was very pretty.
Leon: [slaps Ashley into the third dimension, yet again] Look, I've got like... like, three bullets left. Could you please, just... stay close, and we'll be outta here soon.
Ashley: Okay!
Leon: [opens attache case to use a green herb] Ugh... President isn't paying me enough for this kind of crap, I swear— [closes attache case to see Ashley about to be ritually sacrificed] ARE YOU— WHAT THE FU—

— Pringus McDingus, "Resident Evil 4... I Think."

All his life, the characters he hated most were those who got taken hostage; if someone wanted him to become the sort of weak character who held others back, they might as well just kill him.

— The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System: Ren Zha Fanpai Zijiu Xitong

"Aw, no- hostages. I hate hostages, man. Whinin' on about needing rescuing; takes all the fun outta the job! Sometimes I hate being the good guy..."

— Harry Tipper, TimeSplitters Future Perfect

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