"HIS FACE IS LIKE A BRICK WALL!"
"A BRICK WALL THAT CAN FEEL PAIN AND CRIES A LOT!"
"The ball flies right past the blockers into Sterling's awaiting face, back over the net, and right back into Sterling's face LIKE AN OBESE HOMING PIGEON!"
"He's a Toon, you can drop anything you want on his head, he'll shake it off!
— R.K. Maroon, Who Framed Roger Rabbit
"Don't hit Thomas like that. Hit him like this, it's funnier. And using the sledgehammer is strangely therapeutic."
"Hi, Haley. Look, I found all these free swords. They were in my spleen."
— Elan, The Order of the Stick
Kreese: Howard, I hate that prick. When we fought, that dirty bastard kicked me with his spurs and tore my scrotum.
Howard: Hmm.
Kreese: You know, my nuts unraveled like two balls of yarn - you know how fuckin' long two balls of yarn is?
Howard: Hmm.
Kreese: You know, my nuts unraveled like two balls of yarn - you know how fuckin' long two balls of yarn is?
— MadWorld
"IT JUST HURTS SO DAMN MUCH! AAAAH!!"
—Dale Gribble, wrestling with his son again, King of the Hill
"Sam! Guess what Florence does when you pull her tail!"
It's only funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's hilarious.
—anonymous
"Let's go around those. I'd rather not see you ride off a cliff. [beat] Okay, yes, I would like to see that, but it'd still be really inconvenient."
—Garovel, The Zombie Knight
Yang: Whoop, sorry, D. You okay?
Darrel: I'm okay... it's just my bones... and muscles... and organs... and I think my clavicle is currently trying to jostle my spleen.
Yang: Soooo... is that a yes?
Darrel: I'm okay... it's just my bones... and muscles... and organs... and I think my clavicle is currently trying to jostle my spleen.
Yang: Soooo... is that a yes?
Hilda: Drop it, freak!
[fires a BFG taser at X-Ray, electrocuting him and reducing him to a pile of ash, eyes and a mouth]
X-Ray: Ow. You're welcome... citizen.
Vav: Are you alright, ma'am?
X-Ray: Yeah, don't worry about your friend. Just third-degree burns all over my body.
[fires a BFG taser at X-Ray, electrocuting him and reducing him to a pile of ash, eyes and a mouth]
X-Ray: Ow. You're welcome... citizen.
Vav: Are you alright, ma'am?
X-Ray: Yeah, don't worry about your friend. Just third-degree burns all over my body.
Arthur: Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left!
Black Knight: (Cheerily) Yes I have!
Arthur: LOOK!
Black Knight: Just a flesh wound!
(...)
Arthur: What are you gonna do, bleed on me?!?
Black Knight: (Cheerily) Yes I have!
Arthur: LOOK!
Black Knight: Just a flesh wound!
(...)
Arthur: What are you gonna do, bleed on me?!?
"Pain is hilarious!"
— Bill Cipher, Gravity Falls
"Do you have any idea how much that stings?!"
—Jack Jeeves (after getting his head blown off), Men in Black
"I mean, I love the people down there, I do. I am in love with every single one of those little critters. That doesn't mean the slapstick injury isn't funny."
—Ten (a space probe), 17776
Webby: But [Glomgold] might have a brain injury!
Scrooge: Flintheart Glomgold blows himself up on a daily basis. A simple brain injury is actually a step up!
Scrooge: Flintheart Glomgold blows himself up on a daily basis. A simple brain injury is actually a step up!
—DuckTales (2017), "The Ballad of Duke Baloney!"
Vision: It's funny because of the grievous injuries that man just suffered?
Wanda: No — he's not really injured.
Vision: Ah. How can you be certain?
Wanda: It's not that kind of show.
Wanda: No — he's not really injured.
Vision: Ah. How can you be certain?
Wanda: It's not that kind of show.
Hibbert has treated Homer's entire body after that cliff, fugu poisoning, a heart attack, a coma, food poisoning, being trapped in another dimension, four simultaneous heart attacks, a flower in the head, his entire body once again, drowning, a bucket on his head, a twisted spine, a torn ACL, broken jaw, searing eye pain, rage boils, alcohol poisoning, crushed pelvis, supposed hallucinations, a back sprain, a severe tongue burn, a black eye, Homer suddenly thinking he's 10 years old, narcolepsy, a bullet wound, and another coma, why not? No wonder Homer got addicted to pain pills.
— TheRealJims, Simpsons Histories - Dr. Hibbert
"The crazy antics of The Three Stooges busting skulls and gouging out eyes. Isn't physical pain funny?"
—Narrator upon examining a TV that is on, Amazon: Guardians of Eden
"Thank god this is a light-hearted cartoon, otherwise that could have ended really badly."
— Bob, SMG4, "Stupid Mario Golf"
"Let me try!" Akaoni snatched his book back, and after taking a peek around, he spotted Kanade out with Souta. He used the book to knock both of them over in a heap, which the other villains laughed at.
Hans gives you a knock over the head with his guitar. You hear a loud "Bwong!" and you fall. Hans then throws you out with his broken guitar. Your adventure is over.
— OWL Magazine, 2007 Summer Digest
